ABC333 Khan Black

Journals - Major Programs
#235

I was able to purchase Ascension today. Thanks to a surprise small amount of money that was owed to me showed up, I didn’t know it until I got it.

So I’m also looking forward to the physical shifting in Ascension. It’ll be nice to see results to keep me motivated to work out and stay physically fit. I think the mindset stuff in Ascension would already keep me motivated and dedicated to my physical health/fitness and the body shifting will just be a bonus.

There’s a cashier woman who works at a place I’ve been going. When I walked in today I heard someone say hi and I looked over and she was the only one working that I saw. She wasn’t looking at me though. So when I finally got to the register she said hi again, but I couldn’t even say hi because she didn’t skip a beat and kept helping the other guy ahead of me. But she definitely said hi to me. She’s kinda cute, I’d be open to a one night stand. lol.

I also noticed that when I was in another store I’d walk past an aisle and if a woman popped out, she’d be looking at my eyes, but I didn’t make eye contact because I wasn’t in that mode. So I was thinking I maybe wasn’t making a good first impression. But these weren’t hot women, but it did help me become aware of something that could raise my first impressions.

I have noticed how a lot of sexual hangups have been cleared out. One night I was just feeling a nice spaceousness. So Ascension will be great because it goes back to the basics of I’d say self image and that’s probably the holdback from me expressing the new Primal in more profound ways. Plus it’s a lighter faster acting title, so since I’ve been one to get some of the bloom effect it could make for a interesting rest of the year.

#236

I would be happy to start my new cycle today. But it’s only day 15 of washout, I committed to a 30 day washout.

Evening Update: I have been wanting to get more athletic again. I tried out some plyometric warm ups, just some basics called pogos. My body is definitely not used to that and I can see how it really is best to maintain your athletic skills instead of trying to rebuild them when you’re older. But I’m not over the hill yet and will just have to keep volume low and take it slow. Ideally I would have Spartan in the mix for recovery. I’d definitely like to have a fitness title in the mix but it just doesn’t seem practical. I plan to take LB to 12 cycles. Not sure on Ascension yet but I could potentially see myself switching it for Spartan at some point. I still plan on running the Dragons to start next year, but might wait until I finish out 12 cycles of LB. I’ll be really close and might be more like March when I get to the Dragon duo.

#237

And just like that, now, today, I’m feeling like I want to get in a workout. I have been taking this day off for awhile now. I’ve only been working back into 3x a week. I even realized I need to change my workout days. I need Mon/Tues off to recover because I work my job and recovery is more important. So I’ll actually get in a workout on Sunday my longest work day because I’m done earlier in the day and that will make sure I get those 3 good workout days in.

I think I’ve got some chemistry from yesterday’s workout. I increased intensity but very very briefly. Just those few bursts of high intensity and then I finished my normal workout after. Today I was feeling like yea I want to get a workout in today because I feel good, like maybe I had even more testosterone today or something. So I’ll just do some light mobility work and keep the intensity really low but still break a sweat.

#238

So I’m planning to run through KB 1-4 again, but at 1 cycle for each stage instead of 2. Unless new KB drops before the 30th. If it doesn’t then I’m planning to stick to the current version of KB even if new version drops, as I finish out my second run through.

Between LB and Primal- I’m noticing way more I’d call it confidence. It’s just me saying things that I’d otherwise keep to myself. In conversation, though I wouldn’t call it conversation. It’s when I’m talking to someone and usually they don’t know any better, they don’t know the concept of letting someone talk, someone wanting to I guess just vent if anything, rather than asking for opinions and solutions. Like just about anything. And when someone automatically provides their opinion or “solution” I will just add my own two cents after it, just to let them know that I know that, but also for myself so I’m not left with unprocessed feelings about it, leading to unwanted blocks/feelings/limitations. I will say I notice that it still does feel argumentative to me. But since it’s normal way of “communicating” for most people it’s not taken as argumentative, but to me it’s still coming off as standing up for myself even though I’d really like to not be affected at all. But I think it’s necessary to my grown and Ascension will surely make me confront this more in a big way. I used to be non-reactive to people and I’d see them change and lived in that magic at times, but my own fears got in the way, it was like one of those shooting games where things are coming at you and your shooting isn’t able to keep up and so you get rolled over.

End of night: I’ve been considering sticking with new Primal. Because I’m planning to start over KB from Stage 1. None of the first 3 stages were a problem for me. It’s only when I got to KB 4 that I started reconsidering new Primal. Funnily enough, right after stage 3 KB is when I felt like I wanted more Primal influence. So I moved it into the standard rotation for 3 titles instead of 1x weekly at 15 mins. 1x weekly at 15 mins was no problem, after a couple cycles I just wanted more of it. On KB 4, new Primal was kind of like walking through mud instead of clear water. I just mean to say that it was definitely more of a load and kind of humbled me.

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#239

I was sitting here eating a bag of potato chips, singing random made up songs about my cat. Then all of the sudden it hit me and I looked at my watch time 13:03 so I ran upstairs to get my food out of the oven. I didn’t set an intention, I basically forgot all about it and the food in the oven wasn’t even on my mind. But the other than conscious had my back. That kind of thing if I intended for it to happen it probably wouldn’t. That’s how my “manifestations” go too. If I intend it and work really hard, it might not happen. But if my mind isn’t even entertaining it and I’m just kind of having fun living in the moment, it happens just like that. But I can also say that I intended to get my food out at 13 mins because I did. So I did intend it but with absolutely zero attachment, and if I think about it that could be reckless or dangerous or whatever, and yet it worked out perfectly because I wasn’t attached and watching the plant grow so to speak.

Afternoon: I am still thinking and feeling that I’m going to go ahead with Ascension for the rest of the year. That’ll get me 4 cycles with it. I’m really excited about the physical shifting and narrowed down trimmer focus of Ascension as compared to Primal.

I don’t know when that new Ascension comes but I guess I’d expect by year’s end so I could potentially get a cycle of the new version in yet this year too.

#240

Feeling like I would like to start up a new listening cycle today.

11 more days of my 30 day washout.

I’m planning to move forward with Primal and keep my stack the same. Only thing I will change is that I’m starting over KB from Stage 1 and will do 1 cycle per stage.

I want to make sure that this isn’t recon that has me wanting to switch titles after 4 cycles. I’ve done that a lot in the past. So I’m staying for at least 6 cycles and then I’ll let myself entertain any changes in my stack.

#241

I’ve been listening to Hands On Healing by Bengston, only available as audioboook. It’s about using image cycling as a healing technique, you can even use it as a manifestation technique. Basically you have to be selfish and have no attachment to the outcome. You get a list of at least 10 things and you create an image in your mind, an image that represents that thing you want as already done. You can’t do it for others unless they give you permission. So like say you want money, well you have to go further and go well what would I buy with the money? And the car, vacation whatever. That’s the image you create, already having it. He uses an example to fix your knees, well you don’t know how, that’s not your business, you go to the end, an image of you already having healthy knees would be you skiing, or some activity. That’s the image. So you get 10 of those and you cycle through them rapidly in your mind with feeling, you learn to cycle faster so you can’t even see them.

Well I’ve been on a kick of listening to the book at least 10 times. I guess the first few times I had so much resistance so I never learned the technique. Just getting 10 things I want seemed too daunting. Well it’s a few years later and I’m really hearing the book new. It’s like a new book, I’m hearing things I never heard the first time around.

So today at work I was just playing with baby steps. I just was playing with the idea of shifting my own thinking as training wheels. So I kept asking myself what is something I’d like to have be or do? And I kept bringing it back to that, almost like a meditation while I was working. If I found my mind wandering I’d just ask the question to keep bringing it back. I was also letting go of course. It was fine. Then after work I started to get anxiety, almost like a panic attack. I did some box breathing and more releasing. So I kind of think the anxiety came about because of that new mental stimuli of bringing up what I want. For most people that’s probably not the norm, people can always tell you what’s wrong, but get them to give you a list of 10 things they want that’s hard. 10 things they want to change or don’t like that’s really easy.

End of night: Once again, I’m wanting to start up the new cycle. 11 days to go.

#242

I went to the big box store today. To grab a few things. The hottest couple women were with their bf’s so I didn’t bother checking them out. There was one really cute chick and she was open to me. It’s just that I had zero chemistry for her. I guess I’ve been focused on two other women in my life. I was kind of like, how might I change that so I’m interested in the women that like me, but it’s not too big of a deal. I’m sure I’ll continue to experience changes and breakthroughs.

So far it seems that Primal is more “me” than any other title I’ve tried so far. I haven’t unlocked its seductive themes yet but it’s certainly got me into what people call the I don’t give an f, mindset. Though it always has to be disclaimed, it’s not in a destructive harmful way, it’s not caring about the things that don’t serve me. Being less attached to outcomes and that’s really one of the big secrets in life.

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#243

I’m wanting to get started with the next cycle again.

I’m thinking about moving LB to the 1x weekly spot at 15 mins per listen. Then I want to try my other 2 titles at 15 mins each and see how that works. KB 1 will be easier and Primal will be the big title in my stack until I get back to stage 4 KB.

The dragon’s are looking really tempting again. I tend to look at winter as a time where I can focus more on deeper healing and then want to pick those more fun titles for the summer. Just the really deep realizations and results people are reporting, has me tempted to just dive in on Double Dragon for my next cycle.

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#244

It’s looking like Double Dragon will win out- that is running stage one of dragon red and the next cycle is stage 1 of dragon gold. So running both titles together just alternating.

For the long term this seems like the way to go. As much as I like what new Primal is doing for me, I think this is the best path forward. I’ll continue with KB starting over from ST 1 as well. I am thinking to just go with 2 titles since they’re both multi-stagers.

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#245

Are you planning on listening to DRR and DRG in your playlist starting in March?

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#246

No.

There’s this office I clean and one of the office people has a sticker. It says No. Is a full sentence. It is, unless you have a 5 character minimum requirement! ahaha.

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#247

I guess I’ve come back to my senses. In the past I’ve moved on to other titles after 4 cycles. Those weren’t the best titles. I would say Chosen was but I didn’t like how much attention it was getting. I guess I still had beliefs/traumas whatever to work on within myself.

I’d like to have seen more from LB after 5 cycles but I am wanting to switch it, so I’ll take that as the sneaky recon.

New Primal so far is proving to be closest to what I’ve been after. It doesn’t shine for me as a seduction title but whatever it’s doing seem to resonate with my ideas of what I’m after. I’d like to go deeper into healing that’s why I’ve been tempted to get started with the Double Dragon now rather than later.

KB will stay no matter what. Once I hit stage 4 it seemed like things stalled, but only in that it seemed like it was more healing than anything. So now my thinking is that 2 full runs of a multi stager is really a full run. I still have one more run through before I’ve gone through it twice. So rather than start another healing title, I think it really is the best bet to just keep everything the same for four more cycles.

I’m guessing before then we’ll have the updated KB and of course I’d want to go back through the new version from stage 1.

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#248

I’m not understanding something. What is Double Dragon?

#249

I’ve already mentioned what it is at least twice. So I’ll break it down one more time but in finer detail attempting more clarity.

Double Dragon was a popular video game in the early 90’s. Now that I think of it I think they had a Double Dragon 2 also.

Sub club has two multi/stage titles named Dragon Reborn. One is Dragon Reborn Red. The other, Dragon Reborn Gold.

Somewhere I saw that there was this idea that one could alternate those dragon subliminal titles. Not run at the same time. Sort of intertwine them to get the best of both worlds and possibly some greater synergy.

So I had the idea to run them in such a manner dubbing it Double Dragon. It would consist of running stage 1 red and the next cycle stage 1 gold, making ones way through both titles in a concurrent manner.

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#250

Day 24 of 30 day washout.

If I were in a cycle I’d say Love Bomb seems to be kicking in today. I woke up feeling like I needed more sleep but despite that I have been in a good mood all day. I don’t have specific reasons and nothing major has come up but it’s like things are just sliding off and we rollin’!

Night Update:

So now that I’m finishing up the night. Laying down relaxing it seems to be that I’m getting some clearing in the heart area. It’s almost like energetically the tension will gather in my heart area and then it releases. So it makes sense what I realized today.

I was going to rate my recon with my 3 titles.

#1 recon is new Love Bomb. It’s not all recon but I think the recon I do get mostly stems from this title.

#2 is Khan Black stage 4, the first 3 stages were pretty smooth.

#3 is New Primal. I wouldn’t say I’ve had any recon from this title. I haven’t noticed it yet anyway. I think this title most aligns with me the most naturally. But I haven’t gotten the seduction stuff online or the socializing stuff online, and well, I think that stems from some energetic heart blocks/traumas. Hence, why LB brings up the most recon for me of the bunch.

So, yes. It does make sense for me to stick to this stack for at least another 4 cycles-long enough to make it through KB 1-4 another time.

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#251

Now I’m taking another look at new Sanguine. I am considering replacing new Primal with new Sanguine. New Sanguine is a much lighter title and new Primal is a pretty big title. I am still going through healing with new Love Bomb and so it seems new Primal isn’t fully blooming for me.

I’m thinking I go back to a lighter title and give new LB space to do what it needs to do. That seems to be my biggest blocker, whatever LB is working on. So Sanguine would supplement that and continue on with those traits that I enjoy from Primal, without the push to date and socialize. I consider fall/winter to be my deep healing months. I’d bring back new Primal for the summer.

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#252

Since I’ve narrowed down what I need to work on the most, that’s Love Bomb. I’m still having a challenge deciding what to do with new Primal. I like everything in it but the seduction/social stuff is not serving me right now. Once I get things worked out enough with Love Bomb then that stuff will come alive for me.

I’m again taking a look at Ascension. I think if there were a Primal Black or Lite, something without the seduction focus, I’d want that. I also like the optimism, personal freedom, and fun of Primal. But I really think I won’t miss it and might even be able to maintain it if I switch over to Ascension. I think Ascension will bring its own challenges maybe. And I think paired with Love Bomb it could speed things up in terms of working through whatever I need to.

I have been keeping to 3 days a week with workout. It’s been going great. Gives me enough recover and I’m now starting to notice it in my body. Feeling more capable and a bit lighter. I have an 88lb kettlebell and in my mind I want to just go pick it up. I can do deadlifts and rows easy with it but I’m still taking things slow and steady. Plus I’d rather focus on being able to do chinups and dips more than add any mass with the weights. I think mastering my bodyweight is definitely essential for longevity.

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#253

alright. 5 days to the start of my new cycle. That will complete 30 day washout. I’d say so far if anything was or is still active it would be the lightest title in my stack, new Love Bomb.

So I finally updated my stack for the last time and I’m gonna roll with it. Ascension, new Love Bomb and Khan Black 1.

I will listen to Ascension and new Love Bomb on the same day. I will also start off with 15 mins to see how I fare.

I was also briefly considering bringing Wanted back on board. I think after my time with Primal it would be even better. But since I’m not looking to date right now it could be overkill- I was looking at it for the self-image stuff. Like how it was with Primal, I think it’s great but I just wasn’t benefiting from any seduction aspect just yet.

#254

4 days until I start my new stack!

It was obvious the whole time. But it finally came to me. I was forcing myself into staying on KB. So that was putting the squeeze on myself- limiting myself to one or the other. The two titles in question were Ascension and new Sanguine.

Well, I’ve decided to drop KB and go for what I consider the ultimate baseline foundational stack- Ascension, Love Bomb, and Sanguine. So that’s my stack, planning for the rest of the year. By then there’ll be a new KB and I’ll have a much better idea on where to go from there.

For me there’s more sense of life or aliveness when I consider the possibility of Ascension, LB, and Sanguine. So that’s the way I’ve gotta go. Feels like things are moving again. I’m really looking forward to it.