Very good point. I agree, mature expansive fantasies are the best possible avenue for exploring life.
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From Sub Club I used Phoenix, that helped massively in processing the past through the lens of today. Outside of this forum, the best techniques Ive ever used is Emotion Code, Theta Healing and a series of energy healing videos by Vibration Elevation.
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I see. Thanks for sharing. At times, it feels like c-ptsd is an endless challenge. Most of the time I dont see a way out of it. Itās reassuring to know that Phoenix has proven to be helpful for you.
Usually when I listen to subs I become very dissociated, making it very difficult to process the subliminal. Was that ever a problem for you with Phoenix?
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Just read through from the start of the year to now. I wasnāt going to workout today because I havenāt been feeling up to it. But reading your journal gave me some spark and now i must do my workout!
Iām also going to test out Phoenix. I decided on CFW but Phoenix deserves my attention first. So thatās what Iāll be doing next cycle.
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Suggestions in a sub are normally dissociated from your current state, sounds normal to me.
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As stated above, using outside tools for therapy have cracked the code further in trying to get onto a solid platform for further growth.
Iām at the point now where I can suss out what to expect. Some of the things Iāve learned in this healing journey:
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Most energy healing modalities are super effective for complex emotional trauma
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Subliminals are only useful for ānormalā, trauma free individuals with a stable base.
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Confidence is the supreme root of all success, bar none. Self esteem is the foundation of confidence and is even more important to have.
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Knowing yourself and your talents will go very far in life.
Plugging away listening to Ascension for the best part of 3 years trying to correct a whole host of traumatic episodes, faulty beliefs and regrets was the wrong decision. However, once those other issues got sorted out, Ascension starts to work brilliantly:
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Since thereās no feeling of being unsupported, the confidence needed to be assertive can now be found
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Speaking back at individuals (for good or bad) is a lot easier, I can say whatās on my mind
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As thereās no self abuse feelings going off, relations with others seem to be a lot more pleasant and joyous.
So the lesson for me is donāt get stuck - use the tool that gives the biggest ROI at any given moment.
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What about healing subliminals?
Like reiki?
No one is trauma free
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This isnāt true. People with a history of trauma tend to project their own experiences out into the world, but I guarantee you there are plenty of people living trauma free lives.
Struggles? Yes. Emotional upsets? Definitely. Weāre all human. But trauma specifically is a reaction to events. Not the events themselves. And along with it causing a bunch of dysfunction.
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Nowhere near as effective. Phoenix, DR and Regeneration can take months for someone loaded with C-PTSD, the right energy healing techniques resolve this within weeks.
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What could be great with energy healing/psychology might be Khan Black. I havenāt gotten to stage 2 yet but thatās where youāre supposed to be able to become more sensitive to energy and also be able to direct it.
The second stage of The Crucible focuses on fortifying your energetic channels, enabling you to handle and direct the immense sexual energy that will soon course through your body. As you progress through Tempering of the Currents, you will naturally become more attuned to the subtle energies within and around you, and your ability to consciously control these energies will increase exponentially.
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Very interesting.
Still living paycheck to paycheck, working really hard (for shit pay) and still being subservient to my partner and others.
I donāt know why I keep wanting to be on the surviving rung of the ladder, maybe its an addiction to seeking help when all the energy blocks are gone. Itās why I havenāt touched Emperor or Khan just yet, they seem to be next level alpha.
However the teaching side gig is ramping up and I just donāt have the chops to retain the students attention (Iām a newbie).
So I keep thinking about maybe stacking Ascension with Chosen.
I also donāt think Iām a good person either - like an emotional blood sucker. Do I have enough to contribute to others? Money, emotional support, attention. Did I have enough growing up to want to share? It might be getting used to my needs being fulfiled after post traumatic healing. Maybe I need to be selfish for a while - to start exercising independence and assertiveness before I can give?
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@Michel : That is highly toxic and highly damaging self-talk.
It is of the highest importance that you stack Love Bomb and Love Bomb For Humanity for a solid amount of time.
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This is it 100%. Itās probably not selfishness. Itās probably shame being triggered with healthy emotional needs and it feels wrong. Iām there with you man, unraveling it is tough. Just remember itās not you, those thoughts are the direct result of the abuse you had experienced.
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When I read your reply earlier, I immediately thought of the reselience scripting in the most recent subs. Iāve been on Stark Black and Phoenix, and both have that scripting in them.
I thought of that when you questioned your teaching ability. I was a teacher too, and I seriously questioned myself before my 3rd year started. My old ways of relating to kids was exhausting me, so I brought in a little courage to set the stage. It worked in other settings, it was never āhardā, and when I began being more honest with students, it was beautiful. Just being myself was so much easier.
Concerning speaking up for myself now, Iām wondering about Emperor again. Iām working with a guy who critiques everything, and insists heās right. Iām tired of being voiceless around emotional jerks. Will see. (Emperor is big with the resilience scripting too.)
I thought Iād drop this in here since I read your journal regularly.
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Switching between Ascension, Chosen and Godlike Masculinity.
Being a part time teacher in between having a long menial second job is like sitting on a sharp fence, one side with potential and growth involved, but the other as a means of base survivalā¦ So I cannot quite settle on a complete stack that would take care of being boldly confident whilst having an approachable and neutral aura.
I also worry that Chosen isnāt āalphaā enough but GLM and Ascension would be too far in the dominating direction. 
The aim I need to get clear on is just developing confidence to eventually kick on and do the destined job of the Master Teacher. Right now Iām still too soft spoken, which works in a classroom setting but not so much in the hostile environment of the menial job.
(Thereās also customsā¦ 
)
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Spent a month away from this forum just to get my head straight and set priorities in my life. The first being getting to the root of my Nice Guy traits and the need to please people at work, even though they donāt deserve it. Other tools have been invaluable.
Even so, the idea of using SubClub albums still appeals, so Iād rather use Dragon Reborn stage 4, all of the āstand up for yourself, grow into a man, masculinity buildingā stuff. ST4 isnāt one Iāve used before, so Iād be intrigued in what it does in ZP2. That āconfidenceā eludes me, which is really fear of upsetting others, fear of receiving anger and a lack of self love. So maybe a does of Love Bomb too? Who knows.
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How about Phoenix + Love Bomb?
I ran 5 cycles of Phoenix and a lot is different for me and I just started Love Bomb solo on Sunday.
Sales page at bottom recommends Love Bomb with Phoenix. Check em out bro, see what you think.
Phoenix is one hell of a sub for us guys with past issues.
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