Day 32 washout day 13
Think I’m gonna run Primal + SSX. WB has been great, but I think I need more inner work.
edit: went out to buy some stuff and the cashier asked if I was famous lol. Might’ve just been the neighborhood I was in, but yeah I sort of attributed that to the WB aura…
Day 33 washout day 14
So the problem with WB (or my custom with it), is that I feel little to no drive to go out and meet girls/“game”. I feel good, cool, like I make good impressions the majority of the time wherever I go, I feel the aura working, and I do appear more handsome in the mirror (physical shifting), but yeah little drive to approach. But I do like it, and I stand by my theory that WB would work with basically no effort in a work environment where there’s lots of women you see daily. Also, I think it would work well if you already have good game/social skills, like I feel it really does amplify your aura/charisma/mystique automatically. I also feel like it does make me smoother socially, but again little drive to approach, so maybe it’s not just not the right sub for me at the moment… anyway, maybe will switch WB with PS, or Primal.
Edit: was driving for Uber eats (which has been shit lately), was feeling kinda needy and annoyed, I need a new job lol. Though I think I did get some female attention while walking at the mall. Went to buy some weed (legally), and the budtender was a chill and pretty (imo) girl, and either she was kinda into me or just had a good and chill vibe (or both) but either way, it was a good and healing interaction. SSX healing at play?…
Day 1
PS 15 min, SSX 15 min. Been wanting to run PS for a long time, just gonna do it.
Day 2 rest
Did very little this day. Have achy joints in my hands (hopefully not arthritis lol), I think I messed them up doing pull ups. Went to a yoga class, but not much happened there except there’s this girl who I found hard to get out of my mind. I wanted to talk to her, but also had no idea what to say and also wanted to play hard to get. The first time I saw her, she lit up with a smile, but since then, she’s seems uninterested and quickly looks away if our eyes cross.
Day 3
15 min PS, 15 min SSX
Note: if I run the WB/SSX custom again, replace Cosmic Navigator with Approachability Aura, Potentiator with Enchanting Smile, Direct Influencing Aura with Song of Joy, You Are Not Alone with Alexander’s Play, Entranced with Gratitude Embodiment, and Ethereal Presence with Negativity Dispacement.
Edit: Had a shitty headache today so really didn’t do much (again). I don’t think the headache is from subs, but from going to bed really late the past two nights.
Day 4 rest
I actually seem to feel LESS needy on this stack than with my WB/SSX custom. Maybe it was just because the custom was more dense than the stack, hence more recon. But on the custom I would get annoyed if I didn’t get any looks/attention, maybe because I was expecting it? Idk, but haven’t talked to many girls the last few days so can’t say much is happening yet. I do feel needy when I do my job, but I think it’s just the job. I hate it, it’s been really crappy lately (minimal trip requests), so it’s hard to walk up to a girl and start chatting when I’m in a totally frustrated/irritated mood. Want to run Khan St1, I do think I have some stuff I need to clear up. Might switch…
Oh, btw, I think the healing aspect of SSX has been working, but I don’t write everything down in this journal. One example, is that during yoga, a lady, or girl farted lol. This kinda served to me as a reminder that girls are human too and maybe that took them off the pedestal a bit in my mind…
Day 5
15 min PS, 15 min SSX
Edit: was a good day. Didn’t do that much the first half, later hung out with my parents, went to some old places with them I used to as a kid, and had chats with girls working at these places (some of them seemed pretty interested ). I feel way more chatty and social on this sub than WB, so far anyway. Honestly feel like the reality bubble thing works, like you pull girls into it after a minute or two of chatting with them, and you can turn it sexual or not.
Day 6 rest
Didn’t do much today except drove to buy some stuff, then went to the gym. First walked up to a girl and asked if she worked at a certain weed dispensary, she said she didn’t, I really thought it was her but it wasn’t. Left and talked to another girl, commented on one of her tattoos, and we had like an hour long conversation. She talked a lot, and I got her number. I think she just wanted to be friends though, I don’t care that much as she was a bit thick for me. She looked around a lot while we were talking. But idk. Maybe just someone to hang out with 
Day 7
15 min PS, 15 min SSX. Dropped car off at the shop, went to a yoga class later. Really didn’t do much today. Definitely feeling more of a drive to go out and socialize than my preview stack (WB/SSX custom).
Day 8 rest
Seemed to get some female attention today here and there. Again PS feels way more social for me than WB, in that it makes me WANT to be social. Did some Uber Eats, then went to the gym, at the gym I had the epiphany that when I try too hard to not be creepy, I think I come off as needy/lame/tryhard/boring, but when I’m too forward, I come off as creepy (sometimes at least) and needy. So I figured, screw it, I’m a creep, whatever lol. I’m creepy, and I’m gonna go talk to girls I’m interested in 
Day 9
15 min PS, 15 min SSX
Writing the next day, so don’t remember everything, but went to a yoga class and met a girl (who is married with a kid) who I knew in high school at the yoga studio and had a good chat with her, though that isn’t really a romantic prospect obviously. I was kinda embarrassed that she was married with a kid and here I am still living at home with my parents. But she assured me that having a family and all that kinda sucks too because now she can’t go out and do whatever she wants. And basically she said “nobody’s ahead or behind”, so it was a healing talk in a way. Aside from that I don’t remember everything that happened this day.
Day 10 rest
Got crappy sleep the past few days and as a result I was moody, angry, crazed, and needy feeling today and somewhat yesterday. Not sure if it’s recon or just crappy sleep. It was a busy day for me. Went to the orthodontist, then a smog check, then gym, then drove for Uber Eats for a short bit (which has still been fucking trash lately). Feeling this way has me thinking I should add Sanguine to this stack, and perhaps I will…
Day 11
Inner Circle 15 min. Yep added IC to the stack. Was a good day that started kinda crappy, definitely felt weird after running IC, like mentally, kinda like reality shifting. Felt the same way first few times I ran my first ever stack WB and SS, but that was way worse with anxiety and sadness etc. Had some good interactions with people, and one girl who I think likes me even though I think she has a bf now (not sure though), and yeah curious to see what IC will do. Honestly I sometimes think journaling is detrimental to me, it feels like breaking the flow and is time consuming, and I feel it sets me up for disappointment in a way. Sounds more fun to just run things and let things unfold.
Day 12 rest
Really just went to the gym today, but of course my brother and a couple friends went out tonight, I wanted to go but I’m just fucking tired. It’s annoying, it feels like I’m stuck in a routine and shit is just not going the way I want it to, like my brother/friends go out on nights where I’m exhausted and already did shit during the day etc. This is one of the reasons I want to make a custom with Current Invoker, to hopefully tune to another “current” or “flow”.
Ah, anyway, approached two girls at the gym (well 3 if I count a girl who was using a machine and I asked if I could do some pull ups on it). One girl I asked what her shirt said, and it said “Hood music and dancing” or some shit and was curious where it was from. That was basically it, and she was nice, and I think she was with a guy. Then another girl who I asked what her shirt said and she said it was her boyfriend’s so she didn’t know. She let me read the back and I was like “oh redemption? is it a christian thing?” to which she laughed and said no, I asked if she goes to the gym often and she said she usually goes with her boyfriend, then asked for her name, and then asked for her boyfriend’s name to which she didn’t tell me and was like why? And I just said in case I know him, to which she said I doubt it, then I asked if he was in his early 20s too, and she said yeah, so then I asked her how old she thought I was, she was being non-compliant lol and kinda said something like I’m just here to drink water (at the water fountain), at this point I literally said “eh whatever, go for it, see ya” and left. Normally I’d probably be more persistent, but I suddenly and quickly imagined what all the pick up artist guys I’ve watched/read over the years would’ve done at this point, and they would’ve probably just left, so I did. I felt good about my reaction, like I just let it go and demonstrated to both her and myself that I’m carefree, outcome independent, and easily let things go, I’m willing to walk away.
Anyway I actually don’t give a sh*t about all that lol, I only write it in case it may somehow help anyone who reads it, I’m more annoyed at this routine I feel stuck in.
Day 13
15 min PS 15 min SSX. Beautiful day that started good, then lots of good ole irritation, frustration, neediness, etc. Like I started out strong and secure, and had girls checking me out and stuff at a Sephora, then picked up bad vibes that it stuck with me and was hard to shake. That happens to me a lot it seems, like I just start to feel angry and irritable, maybe I just get hungry and/or the recon kicks in. I even talked to a girl about that who I pick up from frequently and she said it’s the same with her lol. Oh well, it was an okay day, 50/50.
Day 14 rest
Was a good day. Watched a video about the attitude you should have with women/life to be the guy girls sleep with. Was very helpful, not just for women but life in general imo. Just drove for Uber Eats, went to the gym, and went to a yoga class later. Kept this “attitude” in mind and everything went smoothly. Don’t remember the details as I’m writing this the next day.
Day 15
15 min IC. Was a pretty good day, don’t remember the details honestly. Talked to some people. I feel IC makes me more approachable.
Day 16 rest
Drove for Uber Eats and went to the gym. Was a good day. Actually had a girl ask to work in sets at the gym which I don’t recall happening before (been going gyms for 17 years). I attribute it to Inner Circle, I feel people have been nicer/viewing me more positively since running it, like I really think it does make one more approachable, or at least appear so.
Day 17
15 min PS, 10:10 SSX (had to cut it short)
Gawd so much craziness today. Uber Eats was shit, and I was also just angry/needy from recon(?). Had a couple small pleasant convos with fellow drivers. Then later had a convo with a girl who works at a restaurant who seemed interested at first, then she lost interest at some point, and I felt all cold and needy. Was so annoyed at the whole day, so I just went to the gym and worked all that shit off, and ultimately it was okay starting to realize it doesn’t matter how many people like you, whether romantically or otherwise, if you don’t like yourself, none of it really matters. Sure you might get short-lived ego boosts or short-lived natural highs, but if you don’t genuinely like yourself, then you’ll always be reliant on others liking you. Oh so obvious, but I’ve never seen anyone state it that way. Liking yourself is permanent/long-term, it lasts. Having others like you is short-term and never fully fulfilled really.
With that said, I want to run a Primal custom next cycle, or Khan ST1, we’ll see.
Day 18 rest
Again felt crazy, needy, weird, etc. Calmed down after I took a yoga class and a 5-htp, had some positive interactions before and after those things. Was a good day overall.