Today in the evening there will be cacao ceremony…i would really want to take part…but we start at 8:30 pm…and i will be up to long…ill only take a sip
I just realized…i push myself down when i spiral and fall k to a negative mindset…i am ashamed for falling i to transference (negative bias)…i want to let go of that…there is no shame in going into transference…it just is and it is to see that i am focused on the false thing. Nothing to punish myself for. (Especially when tired).
Intense evening.
I stayed true to my word…and only took half a cacao. Proud of myself. Part of me wanted to drink it all…but i made the wise choice. 
It was the first time that i recognized the spirir of cacao and could communicate with it…alchemist does its work…i asked how to be able to feel all this fear in my body…and the spirit pointed me back to the alberto villoldo course: the answer is fear is only conquered by love…so work more on selflove and uncondiontal love in general…heartsong will help here from what i read.
Then during a blindfold game something happened that shouldnt happen…i was pleasured quite nicely and was completely relaxed, completely in receiving mode with an open system…and then was hit…some pain is something i quite enjoy…but normaly you build up pain…especially when its a blindfold game. It was a 9 out of 10. My system went into shock. I felt a lightning go through my body…
I asked myself why this was happening to me…why i needed to learn this lesson…and was reminded on the way i broke up with my ex…it was quite rough and fast…i dont know how else i could have done it… Bur it definitely reminded me of this…still i am sorry for the pain i caused to her…i guess this is one of those times where an adult is needed to hold two feelings…that k have at the same time did the right and the wrong thing.
And it also showed me something about responsibility when someone trusts the other. A topic that will be very important for me if i have a future i facilitating plant medicine…or everywhere else in life as a healer or teacher/coach.
I am proud for not getting into victim mode for long. I am proud for processing my anger soon, and not immediately withdrawing into solitude to precess feelings alone. I asked a woman for a grounding massage and during that i could reframe that experience into an empowering one.
Looking forward to beeing home again tomorrow.
This short loops today werent that impactful…it feels i can go longer on monday…i guess alchemist and emperor are currently more important. Will give heartsong a loop soonish though…maybe alchemist and heartsong on monday.
Started the day today with a dip in the pool…6 degrees celcius.
Going back to my room…remembering that i had a coffee yesterday…and a voice…the inner critic tells me i am weak…
For the first time inguess i could simply answer to this voice…so what…then i am weak…
And then came the realization…i just went into this ice cold water…twice (!!!) with a little pause inbetween…and this voice tells me that inam weak for drinking a coffee??? Really interesting what my psyche does here…i want to include some more reality checks into my mental landscape…
But i am definitely not weak…or i guess…sometimes i am weak…sometimes i am strong…
But what inrecently learned…only the ego compares and makes relative statements…
I am both weak and strong. And thats okay. I have weakness and strengths. I use all my willpower to work on something. I am doing my best. And my whole weaknesses will remain. And thats okay. I am just a human being.
But everyday i will work on myself and make the wise choices. Not to eradicate weakness from my life…but to nurture my strengths…only when a weakness comes in the way of one of my goals i need to work on in. But i wont life anymore ro become perfect, sattvic, or free of weakness…i wont try anylonger to become a god or holy man. I am a human and thats sufficient.
Masculinity is not to have no fear…it is to be able to hold fear and transform it into alertness.
The more i am able to do that…in the higher state of consciousness i am.
There is an interesting feeling in me today. I kinda feel disappointed. This need for touch and physical intimacy has resided and is exchanged with a wall somehow…that i dont want to leave anyone close who hasnt earned it.
I am realizing how much my attention is worth. Also woth what i learn from human design…i know that my attention is my worth as projector. And how important it is for my life now to not leak energy anymore.
I am asking myself how this would work in a relationship. I guess a healthy relationship will be s net positive for both of us…or atleast an equal exchange. Unsure if I am actual ready for that step.
I am still fluctuationg between my mature self and my not so mature self. From what I observe in spaces like this…not many people have aquired that level of internal calmness it feels like for me. But this may be a projection.
Learning to stay in that calm in contact with others is very important. I dont know how yet…i guess its also to increase my capacity for fear. And this will grow by going on.
Home from the weekend retreat.
It was a good experience. I am realizing again what happened in the beginning of the retreat…At home I am basically living the Ashram life…no News, now no tv anymore, not spending time with much friends…I am just doing my own process to develop myself personally and spiritually…So its kinda obvious that when I go out, I have some sort of drop. But I am really really proud of myself for this weekend. I could stay with myself. Nothing seriously triggered me and I am getting emotionally more stable and more stable. People like me more and more.
From one woman I got a compliment that I am a role model for her for how much one can change in one year…that felt amazing.
Another guy that I saw now the third time wants to book a human design reading with me…so business is starting.
Allready had some thoughts about doing a website soonish. Especially as I go through that training in Thailand at christmas…its a full on healing modality. Kundalini Bodywork. The teacher also calls it non dual theraphy.
I am very proud for myself for how I am behaving as I come home…in the past I would have immideatly went infront of the TV to chill…but now I go to the TV to journal. Allready tidied up the kitchen. Continous progress…and when I am to tired to make progress…its time to sleep. I finally surrender to my bodys impulses.
I am proud that I got used to do a minute or two of breathwork before everytime I take rapé. It allways recenters me nicely. Even before the rapé. Quitting it for that thailand journey will go well…although I will miss it.
This time it was super interesting to sense the entity of the temple thats central to temple culture…its at least as healing and powerful as ayahuasca…different…and I will need to investigate it further. I will have the opportunity next weekend and the following week with the training that I take.
I feel anger. And confusion. I am a little torn appart…all this temple events run quite late…they are indeed an opportunity to get some sexual experiences. Though I dont know to get what I really want to experience…I want to experience the wild stuff…atleast in the past it was like this…I don’t really know what I want to experience. I have all those wild fantasies running in my mind…a lot definitley fueled by my former porn consumption.
Its hard to integrate those two parts of me…that really wild one…that I up until now would allocate with my teenage self…but maybe this is because I am not allowing my view of a man to show this kind of behaviour.
And there is this second part…the adult…the one that is responsible…careful…wise…who thinks about consequences…maybe thinks about consequences to much. And who is rather careful into the implications of indulging in wild sexual experiences…who doesnt know what kind of bonding happens during french kissing and having really wild emotional experiences with another human being. There is definitley a fear inside of be to becoming addicted to sex and to another human being. A part that is afraid of sharing to much energy with another human being…an amount of energy that requires integration…It has become very important for me to only make experiences anymore that dont require integration afterwards…so I can continue to live in the moment.
I guess I am again thinking in extremes. Because in other areas I allow myself to take on experiences that need integration…like Ayahuasca. though I am very careful and wise with that.
I really dont want to make big commitments. There is definitley a fear there. A fear of losing my emotional stability that I gained in the last month. I guess it will be a process of becoming more emotionaly capable…and then I can have more intense experiences and integrate them on the fly.
The question if I truly want a relationship comes up again and again…and when writing this…I realize…I am approaching that from the wrong direction…I am again trying to create a role and then finding a human being to put into that role and to find someone to put my projections on…Id rather simply meet a woman and then decide what I would want to do with her. These interpersonal dynamics are complicated for me. And sex is the peak of it. What are the consequences of sex? What does it make with me? What does it make with us? How does it change the dynamics between me and partner? I see again how I intellectualize life…and rather should take it as an experiment… lets see when the opportunity arises to have sex. When it comes I should take it. To find this out. This time engage it more carefully…with the tools I learned in the sexual shamanism…talk before…what meaning this encounter has for both of us etc.
Part of me is resisting to do things only out of fun…only out of hedonistic pleasure… I am afraid to falling back to old patterns of only living hedonistically…but I trust myself and the only way to see if I can handle it is to try it out. I trust the universe. And that the timing will be correct.
I am proud of myself for the level of self reflection I can go into in this journal.
Hmm…
Waking up at home again…Good to be at home and having slept 10 hours again. My body needs that.
During shower I realized that I feel angry and frustrated. I again didnt really take care of my sexual needs and interests during the retreat…I am starting to accept my sex drive, but I dont take good care of it…that solution of masturbate once a week is like a band aid. But nor proper nourishing. Although it was quite nice to masturbate yesterday after yoga and meditation…no Porn…just make it a meditation.
There I encountered that I have an issue with pleasure…it just goes away…It doesnt have this long term positive effect on me…although…during all pleasureable experiences I learn valuable lessons that stay for me…
SO I need to take this more seriously…I admit…I am afraid of rejection. But by far not so much as I have been. This retreat I have been more bold…during a partnered excercise I where we could ask “If i see you, I want to make X with you”, i asked to explore her breasts. I wanted to do that since quite some time…getting that level of boldness now
I see how I use the word finally very often…“finally I got the boldness to ask for this”…I see the pressure that I put on myself…a lot of this pressure has to do something with my represses sexuality…it really longs for expression…I am not taking it seriously. I want to change that. Writing that out makes me feel a lump in my throat. I feel fear. Performance anxiety. With my ex, the first few nights I didnt get an errection. I have the fear to be a dissapointment…This is what I fear most regarding this whole seduction game…seducing and then later not bringing it on…being a fraud…
My experience though says that this wont be an issue anymore…
There is more stored in my throat…more fear…fear of making a fool of myself during flirting…but for my adult self…this is no issue anymore…by making her laugh and jsut going on as a confident man…I showing status and strength…and I guess thats the humor I am looking for…
It feel like I lost my humor somewhere in the last years. I would really like to rediscover it…I had a very very dark humor. It feels vulnerable showing that of…but at the same time i know… showing that of and shrugging all negative comments etc of…shows status.
It reminds me of the music I currently listen to…Rap…in one of the Songs, Sido sings:
I am a bad role model, but I have Sex, Woman and fun and you still have to take the train…
I need to become accomodated with being the bad guy. Having the strength to be tested. Have this internal sense of strength that cant be pulled down. Be firm in myself…that what the Emperor gives me. I am building that. But at the same time…this vulnerable parts inside of me still exist. They are still here and I need to take care of them. My sexuality is part of that.
Super interesting that during writing this entry, I get headaches…those subliminal processing headaches…Last time I listened was 2 days ago…But I guess slowly the script is getting ingrained into my subconciousness…
Meeting a woman today…we met 3 weeks ago for the first time. Shes beautiful but very distant and heady. Not really interested but taking the meeting of a learning experience…and a place where the chances that EmpD create in me can be manifested and trialed.
Its interesting…I again get the fantasys that crazy changes can happen overnight and from one day to the next I am drowning in woman that want to have sex with me and I have the strength not to attach to any of them…there is a part inside of me that is deeply afraid of the process…of beeing bad at something. of being a beginner at something…again an image of my dad and his perfectionism…obviously that this pattern laid itself also on this area of my life. Its okay to be an imperfect human being…
What comes up right here is: How do I manage other peoples imperfections? That they make mistakes and are not perfect?
Its super interesting…this situation from the temple comes up…I didnt put in any margin of error in there…the Main facilitator called it an accident. I immideatly made the person who did it (who I dont know…blindfolds) responsible…how good am I to forgive imperfections and let people be humans and make mistakes…and the asnwer is…not much…I am putting the high standards that I put on myself onto everyone else…and to be honest…I dont know if I want to change that. And if I dont change them with me…and let others have lower standards…how do I not create a big ego…for beeing better, taking more care, etc…? I guess the answer is…others simply try out things. they are free to experiment. Something I rarely allow myself…and voicing it like that…I want to change my high standards…suddenly they feel like a trap. Like something that binds me. Something that makes my life very rigid.
Throwing away more stuff from my home…
My parents would disapprove…keeping things for all occasions…I may need that at some point in my life…but I am having this realization…when I own all those things that I dont need anymore…I am attracting situations where I need those things…sure I wont throw away some servicing parts for my heating system…but throwing/giving away things from my old profession? I dont want to go there again. Im finished with it. Owning all these things…for this chance of “maybe” creates an image of unbundled enerergy in my mind…energy going in all directions and not focused. I want to get to a place where everything I own is conciously decided for. Not necisserily going full minimalist…but only owning stuff that I want to have in my life…and not because its a real shame to throw that away…I kinda see how this resembles with the half empty and half full glas…sticking with the cards that you are dealt with out of fear that the next cards are worse…And I start to see how life is like a game of poker…and my family is leading their life with the cards they are dealt with. not swapping any cards from the getgo…out of fear for getting worse cards… I feel proud for breaking that cycle. I feel pround for trying to win at life instead of trying to not lose at life…
Listening to another song on shuffle…
It will never be how it was…I realize how I still havent let go of my ex. How I am trying to recreate what was…
There is a part of me that wants that my life changes faster…that there is more happening…wishing for life to run faster and that I am at the goal faster…but there is another part that starts to love the process…that is astonished by the new me, that gets up every day and does something I dont like to do. That managed to balance my dopamine within 3 weeks. That manages to go back to the grind when at home…and I love how it gives me stability.
It starts to get normal to do the stuff thats needed. It starts to get the new baseline and I love the sense of power it gives me.
Regarding my ex…this is what comes out of me:
I still you love so much…I never wanted to hurt you so bad. I am sorry, please forgive me. It was a wonderful time we spent together. I will always love you. But our lifes go into different directions now. I told you from the beginning that this will happen. I never thougth that the energy between us will get so strong. That such a strong bond would occour. I never thought that it would be possible to love a human beeing so much. It so strong. Its so strong. To strong for me to handle right now. Beeing with you will take my of my trajectory in life. It will pull me away from my goals. I am not here to make compromise. I am sorry. We knew it all along, but didnt want to face it…because it was so beautiful, sexy, dirty and seducing. thank you for all of that. It was amazing to see what a feminine woman is like. It was amazing to see how masculine I can be. Thank you. Thank you for trusting me more than I would trust myself. Though there is also anger with you…I was honest with you. I told you my boundaries. And you continued to test them and push them…I am sorry for trying to change you aswell… we both did it. Thank you for the time together. You will allways have a place in my heart…or actually…I dont want to trap that part of you in my heart. I set you free. I let you go. Go on and live the life that you want to live. I am letting go of you. I am taking my power back. I cut the chords between us. I love you, I thank you, please forgive me, I forgive you. Lets go seperate ways now. Enjoy your life. I set all energies that I keep from you within me free.
And at the same time…I know its not about you that I grieve…I grieve about how I felt with you…I am writing about all those beeing a man…standing above hedonistic pleasures and feelings…and at the same time I long for feeling so complete as I felt in your presence…I admit it…I WANT TO FEEL GOOD. I WANT TO FEEL LOVED…AND I CANT GIVE IT MYSELF ALONE…I ADMIT IT…I CANNOT…I AM SEARCHING OUTSIDE FOR LOVE… I REPRESS THAT SEXUAL SELF OF ME THAT I CANNOT SATISFY ALONE. I LONG FOR SOMEONE…I LONG FOR A PARTNER…I LONG FOR A MOTHER…I LONG FOR FEELING LOVED…
A tantric practitioneer there told me that she feels like that I need to work with the mother archetype…As i was typing this out I am listening to my crying playlist…and the song Mama came up…and then led me to this realization…to admit that I long for a motherly energy makes me feel ashamed…A man longing for a mother……I long for someone who holds me while I cry…I am trying to do it all by myself…all on my own…all this ayahuasca…everything is about developing the mother archetype withhin me…so I can do hold myself…
So lets work on that…
I am starting torecognize that part inside of me…that during all this process gudies me…holds me… doesnt let me down…is creative…and keeps on giving and beeing patient…
The part that takes time for this process…that does whats needed…
the mother is allready here and withhin me…
ChatGPT Magic…
The mother archetype is one of the most profound symbols in psychology and myth, representing qualities of nurturing, compassion, creation, and protection. When the mother archetype is expressed healthily, it supports growth and resilience. However, its shadow aspects can distort these qualities into control, dependency, or neglect, causing emotional harm. Here’s a look at both the healthy and shadow expressions of the mother archetype:
Qualities of the Healthy Mother Archetype
- Nurturing and Supportive: The healthy mother archetype offers unconditional support and care, creating an environment where others feel safe, valued, and accepted. She provides sustenance and encourages others to thrive independently, not clinging but guiding gently.
This is exactly the quality I am starting to see withhin myself…guiding gently…with patience…taking time for that hurt part inside of me…that doesnt give up on me when I am emotional…that doesnt (anymore) say…oh you cry again…oh you havent finished all that self love “issues” by now…
- Encouraging and Empowering: She allows and encourages growth by giving the “space” to make mistakes, fostering independence and resilience. Her love is empowering, allowing her “children” (literal or symbolic) to explore, learn, and build self-confidence.
I feel this energy right now…in the process I am goin through…taking quality time for myself everyday to journal…to grow…to process emotions…accepting them fully…giving myself the space I truly need…to go through that process in my time, speed and timing…that isnt anymore fixated on the outcome…only fixated on my needs in the present moment…not rushing and pushing me anymore…
- Compassionate and Accepting: A healthy mother archetype is nonjudgmental and patient. She offers compassion not only to others but also to herself, embodying an understanding that all beings are worthy of love and forgiveness.
Unconditonal love of all beings…something I want to develop. Something that I know will be the answer to all the fears I have…A part that doesnt say anymore…“oh you still fear that…a man doesnt fear that…”…Unconditionally accepting for what is in the present moment.
A Song is running…And I give, and I give, and I give, myself to you……this is what I am doing…I am giving myself fully to myself…FULL attention…FULL compassion…FULL patience…
- Protective without Overcontrol: The healthy mother archetype protects and defends, creating a sense of safety. She sets appropriate boundaries but avoids overprotection, allowing others to learn, take risks, and grow.
This is what I created in my life…I created for myself this space to grow. This safe space. Of having the time, ressources and structure now to fully get to know myself…to take care of my nervous system and my body…and to fully dive deep into all my challenges (I wanted to write issues again…but I am making a change now)… my inner mother wont see those things as Issues anymore…but as parts of a natural process every child/man/human being has to go through…I want to become more patient with myself from now on…and let myself take risks and learn…not beeing overprotective anymore…a quality that my mother definitley showed…
- Sacrificial but Balanced: She is willing to sacrifice and put others’ needs above her own when necessary, but she also maintains her own identity and well-being, understanding the importance of balance and self-care.
Exactly this is the change that happened in the last weeks…I let that inner child/tennager take over in my life…The adult me sacrafices itself for my child parts…just as my parents did…they sacrifice their own lifes just for the family…and for the family business…but that wealth is also meant for their inheritance…
I lost my own identity and completley sacrifices myself for the childish needs of me…not anymore…but its time to find balance between the adult/teenage and childish needs of me…writing down the word childish, i get a ping again that a man shoudlnt have childish needs…I see how I again try to live in extremes…hoping from one extrem to the next…but I get better at recognizing it…and that means that integration has started and will move on…
- Wise and Intuitive: Connected to inner wisdom and intuition, the healthy mother archetype uses her insights to guide herself and others. She respects the natural cycle of growth and decay, creation and release.
I feel like I have developed that quality beautifully in myself. I mean…look at the beautiful progress and process I am going through since I started this journal…and especilly since now two weeks…it feels like I have changed in an amount that I cant even put into words…it feels like I am someone totally different…and its not “just the subliminals”. yes they help…but its me…who takes time to journal everyday. Who uses the pauses between retreats to journal…who as soon as a feeling appears works withit…as soon as an emotional need comes up, nourishes that need…not drowning feelings anymore in food, media or productivity…
Need to make a pause to have breakfast and nourish other needs 
going even through that first part showed me how much I have grown…how much I have changed. How far I have journeyed. It gives me the trust that I am at the perfect point of developing the healthy mother inside of me…I feel love right now
Shadow Expressions of the Mother Archetype
The shadow expressions arise when the mother archetype’s protective and nurturing qualities become excessive or warped. This can lead to control, dependency, and self-neglect or even rejection.
1. The Devouring Mother
- Qualities: Overbearing, controlling, and suffocating. The devouring mother archetype is so involved in others’ lives that she restricts their autonomy, often unconsciously stifling growth in the name of love.
- Effects: This expression leads to dependency, resentment, and an inability to function independently. The devouring mother may keep others “small,” fearing they will leave or no longer need her if they succeed or mature fully.
- Example: A parent who refuses to let their child make any decisions on their own or who tries to live through their child’s achievements, denying them independence.
The devouring mother was strong in my mother…linving through our achievements…as she was overidentifiying with her mother role and neglecting herself, she tried to steer all of us 3 brothers into a direction in our lifes. For me it wasnt so bad…but for my middle brother this was super bad…pushed him into a carreer…simply because of that carreer is socialy high seen and can give a lot of money… Also I wasnt really allowed to make “learning experiences”. Perfection was required from the gifted kid
2. The Abandoning or Neglectful Mother
- Qualities: Emotionally or physically absent, unresponsive, or neglectful. This shadow archetype is distant, dismissive, or unaware of others’ needs for support and nurturing.
- Effects: This expression can lead to feelings of unworthiness, abandonment issues, and struggles with self-esteem. Those affected may find it difficult to trust others or believe they are worthy of care and love.
- Example: A mother figure who is present but emotionally unavailable or preoccupied, leaving others feeling alone, unseen, and unsupported.
In our family, the question “How do you feel?” was never asked. It was only important how you performed, what you did or what you suceeded at. Emotions were completley abandoned. But my parents never learned to look at their own emotions…so what to do…
This resulted in all of us living from our head and abanddoning our hearts…I never really felt loved in my family…I have to say though…for needs of the material plane…food, toys, money for anything…my parents cared super well for us…but especially my mother, still as today uses this as a tool to try to control and steer us…She basically raised dependet men who cannot stand on their own and whom she can control with money…
3. The Martyr Mother
- Qualities: Overly self-sacrificing, martyrdom, and self-neglect. This expression involves someone who constantly puts others’ needs above her own, often at a significant personal cost, and may expect gratitude or acknowledgment in return.
- Effects: This behavior can lead to burnout, resentment, and guilt-tripping, as well as dependency in others. The martyr mother may feel unappreciated and misunderstood, expecting others to recognize her sacrifices and become resentful when they do not.
- Example: A mother who exhausts herself emotionally and physically for her family but becomes passive-aggressively resentful when her sacrifices aren’t acknowledged.
Ohhhh yes, this is so strong…my mother changed her own self worth for external self worth through our achievements…she abused the mother archetype for gains…she got lost in it. She gave to much. And failed to actually RAISE us. To make us self sufficient. It runs in the family I guess…her mother was the same. She thought that Kids grew up emotionally and psychologically by themselves…but again…what to do…she also didnt get that…
4. The Seductive or Manipulative Mother
- Qualities: Uses emotional manipulation or seduction to maintain control, sometimes blurring boundaries to keep others dependent or indebted. This expression often involves subtle (or overt) guilt-tripping, making others feel they “owe” her.
- Effects: Creates dependency, guilt, and confusion. This shadow mother archetype can create enmeshment, where others feel overly responsible for her emotions and needs, leading to boundary issues.
- Example: A parent who makes a child feel guilty for wanting independence or personal space, subtly making them feel like they are abandoning or betraying her.
This energy is very strong in my mother. She blames a lot on ungratefulness…she does so much and we dont show our gratefulness…gaslightning emotions…doesnt understand that I want to make my own life decisions and have my own lifes journey, rather than a preplanned one…but I start to see…how much I have allready worked on this. How much I allready claimed my space. How much I have grown in only 2 years…I am proud of myself
5. The Repressive or Perfectionist Mother
- Qualities: Highly critical, perfectionistic, and controlling. This mother expression is more concerned with meeting specific ideals or societal standards than with nurturing individuality.
- Effects: This behavior can stifle self-expression and creativity, leading to anxiety, self-doubt, and internalized perfectionism in others, who may fear failure or feel inadequate.
- Example: A mother who sets impossibly high standards for herself and others, leading to constant criticism and a lack of emotional warmth or acceptance.
Yes…she was like that when it went in the direction of how to live a life…“look at your father, look at how much he workes and does…dont be so sensitive…sometimes you need to pull yourself together…” My fathers perfectionism is so strong…and somehow she carries the same…but she externalizes it onto him…and is the complete difference…deeply flawed…but expecting perfectionism from everyone else…I am recognizing that I again using the magnifier and thinking black and white…shes not that bad…as I am writing…but I guess this magnifier has its uses…and I start to see that I have the magnifiying glasses on…
She was definitley very very concerned that her sons meet societal expectantions and ideal. And lacking space for individuality…
6. The Smothering Mother
- Qualities: Similar to the devouring mother, the smothering mother is excessively involved but may not seek to control as much as to merge emotionally, often lacking boundaries.
- Effects: This archetype can make others feel “drowned” in attention and care, which may prevent them from developing their own sense of identity or independence.
- Example: A mother who over-identifies with her child’s emotions, making it difficult for the child to separate and grow independently.
I also know this one…its a push and pulll…pull me in with being overly involved, showering me and my brothers in money, nice words etc as long as we behave…and taking it away if we dont behave…withdrawal of affection as a punishment…I did the same with my ex-gf…need to research more about this…I guess it has a lot to do with accepting my and my partners imperfections and reaching a state where I can both love someone and be angry at that person
Balancing the Mother Archetype
Working with the mother archetype requires awareness of both healthy and shadow expressions. To develop a balanced mother energy, it helps to:
- Cultivate self-awareness of when you are slipping into controlling or neglectful behaviors.
- Practice self-compassion and acceptance, acknowledging that mistakes and imperfections are part of growth.
- Set boundaries that allow both support and independence.
- Encourage and respect autonomy in others, allowing them to make choices and learn from their own experiences.
Understanding these dynamics helps individuals recognize and develop a balanced inner mother archetype, fostering healthy nurturing qualities without falling into shadow behaviors that may hinder growth, independence, or self-worth.
wow…that was quite an growing experience…
Wondering if subs can do all of that without journaling aswell…without knowing anything…
Would I want that to happen? I guess not…I want to understand how my psyche works. This is my capital for being a transformational coach in the future…if I take this route.
Had a phonecall with my bestfriend…
And realized: There was also this mother inside of me that fed ALL the wishes and desires of us children…and I this thought comes up: This is were the father comes in…who sometimes needs to discipline a child…who needs to help the kid to get rid of silly ideas and things that arent good for it…
I was missing some strictness in my childhood…in the right areas…
The word tyranical child comes up withhin me…
MORE ChatGPT Magic:
The child archetype represents innocence, wonder, creativity, and the potential for growth. It embodies the qualities of playfulness, curiosity, and emotional vulnerability, as well as a sense of dependency and trust. In healthy expressions, the child archetype nurtures creativity, adaptability, and the ability to see the world with fresh eyes. However, in its shadow forms, it can manifest as self-centeredness, entitlement, and immaturity. Below are the primary child archetypes, each with its healthy and shadow expressions:
1. The Innocent Child
- Healthy Expression: This child archetype embodies purity, trust, openness, and a sense of wonder. It is connected to a sense of awe, hope, and curiosity, seeing the world without cynicism or fear. The innocent child allows one to experience life with joy and appreciation, retaining a sense of faith and optimism even in challenging times.
- Shadow Expression: In its shadow form, the innocent child may become naïve, overly dependent on others, and vulnerable to exploitation. This can lead to a refusal to accept reality, a tendency to avoid responsibility, or an idealized view of life that denies hardship or conflict.
- Example: An adult who refuses to take responsibility or who avoids reality by maintaining an overly simplistic or “rosy” view of the world.
2. The Orphaned Child
- Healthy Expression: This child archetype reflects resilience, adaptability, and independence. Having faced loss or abandonment, the orphaned child learns to rely on inner strength, resourcefulness, and self-sufficiency. This child archetype often values community and understands the importance of empathy, support, and connection.
- Shadow Expression: The shadow orphaned child feels unloved, abandoned, or unworthy, often struggling with trust issues and a fear of intimacy. This can lead to self-isolation, chronic self-doubt, and suspicion of others, as well as a tendency to expect rejection.
- Example: An individual who keeps others at a distance or isolates themselves emotionally out of fear of being hurt or abandoned.
3. The Magical Child
- Healthy Expression: The magical child archetype represents imagination, creativity, and the ability to believe in possibilities. This child sees magic and wonder in the world, inspiring creativity and joy in others. In a healthy expression, it enables an open mind and a belief in one’s ability to manifest change.
- Shadow Expression: In its shadow form, the magical child may become delusional, unrealistic, or escapist, avoiding challenges by retreating into fantasy. It may lead to avoidance of practical concerns or an unrealistic approach to life that impedes growth and responsibility.
- Example: A person who continuously pursues unrealistic goals without grounding in reality, avoiding practical responsibilities in favor of dreams.
4. The Tyrannical Child
- Healthy Expression: This archetype can harness leadership qualities when balanced, with the capacity to assert oneself confidently and set boundaries. When grounded, the tyrannical child’s sense of power can transform into positive assertiveness and the ability to influence others.
- Shadow Expression: The shadow tyrannical child is controlling, demanding, and domineering. It seeks to be in control of situations or people and may throw “tantrums” or react with aggression when things don’t go as desired. This child archetype is motivated by fear of losing control and is prone to manipulation or intimidation to get its way.
- Example: An adult who seeks to dominate conversations, make others feel “beneath” them, or reacts with hostility when challenged or corrected.
5. The Spoiled Child
- Healthy Expression: In its healthy form, this archetype expresses a deep sense of self-worth, confidence, and the ability to receive love and care. It embodies a natural willingness to accept good things in life without shame or guilt, celebrating abundance and gratitude.
- Shadow Expression: The shadow spoiled child feels entitled and expects to be given whatever it desires without effort or appreciation. This archetype often struggles with delayed gratification and may react poorly when its needs aren’t instantly met, showing impatience, greed, or resentment.
- Example: An adult who refuses to accept criticism, demands special treatment, or feels that the world “owes” them, becoming upset when things do not go their way.
6. The Egocentric Child
- Healthy Expression: When expressed healthily, the egocentric child allows one to value their own thoughts, emotions, and experiences. This archetype encourages self-awareness, self-care, and a positive self-concept, fostering inner strength and a solid sense of self.
- Shadow Expression: In its shadow form, the egocentric child is self-centered, viewing the world only from their perspective. This child archetype may lack empathy, be demanding of others’ attention, or ignore the needs of those around them. It struggles with recognizing others’ experiences as equally valid, leading to isolation and conflict in relationships.
- Example: An individual who talks only about themselves, disregards others’ needs, or reacts with indignation when not the center of attention.
7. The Wounded Child
- Healthy Expression: The wounded child archetype embodies the potential for healing and self-compassion. Those with a wounded child archetype often understand suffering and are sensitive to the pain of others, which can inspire a deep sense of empathy and compassion.
- Shadow Expression: In its shadow form, the wounded child becomes stuck in victimhood, using their suffering as a reason to avoid responsibility or personal growth. This can lead to patterns of self-pity, blaming others, and difficulty moving forward.
- Example: An individual who constantly seeks sympathy or uses past pain as an excuse for current behavior, without seeking healing or growth.
Balancing the Child Archetype
To work effectively with these archetypes, it’s important to:
- Recognize and Integrate Both Sides: Understanding how these archetypes manifest in your life can help you appreciate their positive qualities while addressing their shadow forms.
- Cultivate Emotional Intelligence: Developing emotional awareness and self-reflection can help temper the impulsive, reactive tendencies of the child archetype.
- Allow for Growth and Self-Compassion: Embrace the need for self-compassion, while also practicing accountability and resilience. Letting go of entitlement, victimhood, and control can help move these archetypes toward healthy expressions.
The child archetype, in its healthiest form, inspires us to approach life with openness, playfulness, and wonder while maintaining emotional resilience and maturity. Recognizing both the light and shadow aspects of these archetypes offers a path to inner balance, enabling us to embrace the gifts of innocence and joy alongside the wisdom of self-awareness and growth.
will work on this at a later point
I had a really nice talk with a woman who is polyarmourus with her husband…
It was super intersting. ButI recognized…he wasnt in his masculine and wasnt taking in the masculine role in the relationship…again I see my tendency…to try to push extremes onto two partners. Sure both can have some masculine and feminine qualities…But i defitley want a relationship in which I can be more than 50% in my masculine…a polarized relationship…yet on eye level…
I asked her about her view on falling in love…and she said…well…with those other people there can be lessons learned…
I immedeatly thought back on this encounter I had with my buddys ex…where I felt something…and that I cut off because of that…I feel there can be control over whom I allow myself to fall in love. In the preparatory course for my course in thailand there he mentions how its importance to have coherence between mind, heart and sex…In those tantra places I see an overemphasis on the heart…just follow your heart is a dangerous road to walk I feel like…its another extreme as just follow your cock…or just follow your mind…its all about balance…
There is a part withhin me that is open and interested in polyamourous relationships…because of the freedom it promises…but I feel this is a danger…it is a dangerous path to walk on…and this level of freedom in that dimension will have a high cost in other dimensions… I feel like being polyamourous is relating on steroids…its divinding energy again…dividing attention. A fear of going deep with one…and this is something that I want…I want to go deep with one…its scary, but I feel like that thats the right path…
It feels good to write this down. Something relaxes inside of me.
There is another part…that imagines that the wanted black path is fun and everything…but it misses a certain seriousness that I start to like withhin myself. It somehow misses purpose. It feels to be something that is of shallow nature to me. dividing energy.
This is helpful for me to “define” my relationship status: I am looking for a partner, but I am open to explore and have fun till I met her. I dont really know yet what I am looking for in a partner…or actually…
I would love her to be able to go in her feminine…to be able to let her be led by me.
I want to be able to be present with her. To be able to jsut be with her…relax with her…no talking…just being…I want someone who can accept my need for solitude…someone who is able to nourish her own emotional needs and not only resides on me to do so…someone who works on herself…who is also on this process to purpose and her core…where we can share wisdom and growth together…
And sex is very important…I need someone who is open for crazy sexual experiences in their multitude…tantric sex…slow sex…sex on drugs…BDSM…
I want someone to have an intensive time with…and a calm time…and then also some space apart to integrate what he have experienced with each other…without needed each other to do that. I want someone whom I dont have to change or be a project for me…someone who has distanced herself from toxic people in her life…so we can can actually grow together and not me pulling her along (like it was with my ex).
So it seems I know what I want…
From a physical standpoint it would be nice if shes slim and smaller than me…I like blonde and blue eyes…just like me…She needs to be deep and intellectual…there needs to be a connection at sex, heart and mind…
I want someone who is financially stable…i have accepted that woman will want some financial help from me…
But I want a woman that i can break up with even if she lives with me and who can affort to get her own place…my ex wasnt in that position…she had no savings at all…
I want a woman who can look after herself…or has her own safety net installed…someone who is stable…basically…and i relaize this jsut now…how unstable I have been…and how much this last month has changed…
And a voice inside of me asks: you just learned walking alone…and you want to dance with another? are you ready for that?…A wise question…The universe will help me and will only bring a woman to me when I am ready…I trust in that!
And in the meantime there is shameless masturbation or visits at the sexual theraphists…
That meeting with the woman…WENT GREAT
I had no interest in her at first…but man…as I start to accept my own intellect and not only try to live by the heart anymore…I could also admire her intellect. And she indeed is full of wisdom…I am a bit hooked…not to much…
But at the end of our meeting…she asked me when I leave to thailand…and asked me to have another meeting before…only when I told this my best friend he reflected that to me I understood…that means shes interesten in me…
This meeting was immideatly followed with a online session with my shamanism teacher…an intense one…we went deeeeeep into my mother wound…and she gave me some advice no therapist will give me. How to behave with my parents…how to express my boundaries properly and in the moment…she showed me ways how to talk with my parents that I couldnt have imagined…
Also she reflected to me that the places I have to work on my triggers…parents, very good friendships…are hard places to work at…to socialize a bit more…talk with strangers…I have resistance to that. But I deeply know that this is a medicine for me that I need…Emperor Daddy for sure will help me with that.
Now going for a walk in the dark cold fall…
My body asks for it. I yield.
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I feel great right now…I feel happy…I dont feel like that often…
As soon as I recognized that I feel happy…fear came up…a fear that said: be careful, someone is gonna come and take that happiness away from me. I dont know where this comes from…some intuition says its coming from my childhood…that I played happily with a toy and my brother was in a bad mood and came and started to distract me and didnt let me play alone in my happiness…
Its super interesting…I am quite a hermit…And I am happy to be it. I start to get to a place of beeing happy in my aloneness. I see a parallel between a lot of things that are currently changing withhin me…It feels like my alonetime starts to become very peaceful…and time with other people bring two things and are a two edged sword: they bring closeness, growth and many positive feelings…but they also bring out a lot of triggers. And those triggers are a danger to my peace that I start to love.
My human design talks about this…that I am a hermit…that I want to be left alone very often…but at the same time that I have a body that wants company…that the profile I am carrying is quite unharmonic and has a certain tension to it.
Its kinda crazy…upon the realization that this girl may be interested in me…the spinning in the head starts…I am making good effort to stop it. This is very dangerous. I learned it with my ex.
We had quite deep talks yesterday…talking about our past relationship experiences…and seemingly I am still triggered between what happened between my Ex-Wife an me…
Trusting her fully…investing quite a lot into her…both money and time…Living for free, in a quite luxury house…free plane flights…I helped her so much when she did her college degree next to working. I took good care of her…and all of this was worth nothing to her…There is definitley some anger left. A psychologist that talks openly about men woman relating on youtube says that woman work differently. Men think in that level of investment. But woman are more in the moment and if a man doesnt manage to instill a certain level of emotion in her and attraction…there is no loyality…
I dont want to paint all black and white. But I definitley take more care in the future how much I invest and think of everything that goes to a woman as gone…and not really believe that there is an us.
Today I am gonna to meet the San Pedro Spirit again.
I plan to journal a lot during this trip. Gonna last the whole day.
I definitley want to work on those child archetypes and shadows…and on the father archetypes and shadows.
I want to be more centered and relaxed again. I lost the level of relaxaton I had before the retreat.
Did some Rapé in preparation…I feel the call to listen to Heartsong again…my past relationship hurt is still deep…and its in the way of all my connections with woman…be it casual or serious.
It is really suprising to me how deep this rabbithole goes…but I start to realize…Heartsong is not only working on my past relationships its also working on the relationship of my parents…the relationship thats was the base of all my relationships…and I feel it also works deeply on my mother and father wound. Its really intense healing work.
A pump in my basement broke today…allready did my 1.5 hours of admin stuff that I dont like…(put things to give away from craigslist instead of throwing them away)…The repair will happen another time. its not critical to do it immideatly.
One thing that came up several times in the last time was my relationship with pleasure. I dont allow myself pleasure. I dont feel like I deserve it. There are stories running from my fathers side…all work needs to be finished before you are alowed to relax and get pleasure…and all work is never finished…my mom is the contrary…she is living a pure hedonistic life…
I start to see how I took on those gender roles…that somehow the feminine is allowed to be lazy, be served, be pleasured…and the masculine is not…this thing that comes over and over again is this ascetism…you have to be a happy with nothing, be able to create energy and unconditional love withhin you, and share it to the world…while receiving nothing…I see this with “my role model” of a guru…and i start to see now…that this is simply the magnifiying glass on the role of the masculine in the relationship that was role modeled for my by my parents…and at the same time…this is also what in Human design a generator is…and I am not that.
1.5hours into san pedro…I feel very very vulnerable. I feel fear, I feel like I am 15 years old. I want to get away from my parents. We dont share our view of reality anymore. They only think about US US US…but in the End its my mom who is just like ME ME ME…a neverending sink of energy. A source of shoulds, rules, how to behaves and musts. I dont want to have her in my life anymore. I feel bad and ashamed for wanting that. And thats okay. My shamanic teacher yesterday told me that my parents are feeling that…and because of that they are slowing down and not moving forward with that house ownership topic…when they dont have me on a financial leash anymore…they have no control over me anymore…when they dont have that control over me anymore…they have to behave with me…they have to treat me as an equal to be in contact with me any longer. They have to be interested in what I do and have to say…and not brush it off in desinterest. It hurts that there is no interest in my process…in my process of becoming a healthy, adult man…a great man to say…it really hurts. But i know that I cannot change them…I am not trying anymore. I accept it… I accept that they arent interested in anything I do…I accept that they will not approve of me growing up and maning up. I accept that they will challange me into my manhood on and on again. I accept that they will push and test my boundaries over and over again.
While I write that I dont want to see them again…there is also a part withhin me that finds comfort withhin family. All the history we shared. All the experiences we had…there were a lot of beautiful ones…actually…I start to realize another program of my family…to spoil children to the max, because later life is serious, not pleasureable and shit…
We three brother have been really spoiled…with everything…but emotional comfort. And boudaries. And rules. And a strong hand that helps us to become adults.
Time to get into the shadow of my child…
I am sorry for being ungrateful. I am sorry for not honoring you. I am sorry for misbehaving. I am sorry for thinking that all belongs to me. I am sorry for being so narcissistic.
I am sorry for hurting your feelings. I am sorry for being your biggest nightmare. I am sorry for beeing your fears come true. I am sorry for being a spoiled bratty child. I am sorry for wanting you to be different than you are. I am sorry for expecting you to be omnipotent and not accepting you as imperfect, failable human beings with endless ressources…I am sorry for taking your money as granted. I am sorry for not seeing your limitations and pushing on and on. I am sorry. I am sorry for taking all the nurturing you provied for granted. I am sorry for seeing you half empty instead of half full.
I am sorry for failing your expectations of a child. I am sorry for being imperfect. I am sorry for not being what you wished for. I am sorry for not being able to fullfill the projections you put onto me. I am sorry for being a failable, human being with endless capacity.
I am sorry for not rebelling enough. I am sorry for rebelling to much. I am sorry for trying to manipulate you. I am sorry for trying to change you.
I am sorry for being to sensitive for you. I am sorry for forcing you to grow. I am sorry for forcing you to expand your horizon. I am sorry for forcing you to confront your shadows. I am sorry for beeing dependent on you.
I feel deeply humbled…when trying to look at myself from the lens of my parents.
How ignorant I was for believing I was the perfect child…The shadow expressions of the mother and the father for sure would have pulled out the worst of the child archetype in me…
Lets dive into the meat:
MORE ChatGPT Magic:
The child archetype represents innocence, wonder, creativity, and the potential for growth. It embodies the qualities of playfulness, curiosity, and emotional vulnerability, as well as a sense of dependency and trust. In healthy expressions, the child archetype nurtures creativity, adaptability, and the ability to see the world with fresh eyes. However, in its shadow forms, it can manifest as self-centeredness, entitlement, and immaturity. Below are the primary child archetypes, each with its healthy and shadow expressions:
1. The Innocent Child
- Healthy Expression: This child archetype embodies purity, trust, openness, and a sense of wonder. It is connected to a sense of awe, hope, and curiosity, seeing the world without cynicism or fear. The innocent child allows one to experience life with joy and appreciation, retaining a sense of faith and optimism even in challenging times.
- Shadow Expression: In its shadow form, the innocent child may become naïve, overly dependent on others, and vulnerable to exploitation. This can lead to a refusal to accept reality, a tendency to avoid responsibility, or an idealized view of life that denies hardship or conflict.
- Example: An adult who refuses to take responsibility or who avoids reality by maintaining an overly simplistic or “rosy” view of the world.
I am deeply guilty of that. I am naiv, I am overly dependent on others and I am vulnerable to exploitation. I am avoiding responsibility. And I have a tendency to create a idealized view of life without hardship and conflict…all of it…I admit it. Its been getting way better in the last years though…
I see the other side of the coin aswell though…I am learning to experience life from a state of joy, faith and optimism…more and more…everyday a bit more.
2. The Orphaned Child
- Healthy Expression: This child archetype reflects resilience, adaptability, and independence. Having faced loss or abandonment, the orphaned child learns to rely on inner strength, resourcefulness, and self-sufficiency. This child archetype often values community and understands the importance of empathy, support, and connection.
- Shadow Expression: The shadow orphaned child feels unloved, abandoned, or unworthy, often struggling with trust issues and a fear of intimacy. This can lead to self-isolation, chronic self-doubt, and suspicion of others, as well as a tendency to expect rejection.
- Example: An individual who keeps others at a distance or isolates themselves emotionally out of fear of being hurt or abandoned.
ohh wow…thats me. Thats me building my own soul family. Thats me finding communities where I feel at home. Thats me learning to trust anew after all the heartbreak I went through…I see the tendecy of myself to isolate myself. To trying to do everything on my own…and I see how I run away from commitment and emotional bonding out of the fear of being hurt and abandoned…
3. The Magical Child
- Healthy Expression: The magical child archetype represents imagination, creativity, and the ability to believe in possibilities. This child sees magic and wonder in the world, inspiring creativity and joy in others. In a healthy expression, it enables an open mind and a belief in one’s ability to manifest change.
- Shadow Expression: In its shadow form, the magical child may become delusional, unrealistic, or escapist, avoiding challenges by retreating into fantasy. It may lead to avoidance of practical concerns or an unrealistic approach to life that impedes growth and responsibility.
- Example: A person who continuously pursues unrealistic goals without grounding in reality, avoiding practical responsibilities in favor of dreams.
Well…here we are…this one is strong in me…its shadows? I DONT KNOW…as all of this shamanism…subliminals…ayahuasca…has shown me that things are possible that was way beyon the scope of what I dreamt of… I have definitley been trying to run after unrealistic goals…thinking that as soon as I finished my yoga teacher training to be some sort of guru instantly and people will come rushing to me for guidance or wisdom…so here some fine calibration is needed…but with subclub here we know…craaazyyyy things are possible!!! Human design also tells me that a sign of me being myself is when my view is focused on possibilies…rather than probabilities…
4. The Tyrannical Child
- Healthy Expression: This archetype can harness leadership qualities when balanced, with the capacity to assert oneself confidently and set boundaries. When grounded, the tyrannical child’s sense of power can transform into positive assertiveness and the ability to influence others.
- Shadow Expression: The shadow tyrannical child is controlling, demanding, and domineering. It seeks to be in control of situations or people and may throw “tantrums” or react with aggression when things don’t go as desired. This child archetype is motivated by fear of losing control and is prone to manipulation or intimidation to get its way.
- Example: An adult who seeks to dominate conversations, make others feel “beneath” them, or reacts with hostility when challenged or corrected.
I know that one…I know my fear of not beeing in control…it feels like all of this is in the process of getting transformed…I definitley react with aggression when things dont go as desired…but I dont live out the aggression…i internalize all the anger…by now I know how to process it…but I definitley want to be able to direct anger at someone…in a balanced healthy way. not as a reaction, but am action. Tell people to stop it. This is what my shamanism teacher told me yesterday…telling my parents to stop it as soon as they are infantilizing me. In the moment. As soon as they are overstepping a boundary. In a calm and manly way. This is a nice goal. I want to get there. It grows as my resiliance and emotional maturity grows.
5. The Spoiled Child
- Healthy Expression: In its healthy form, this archetype expresses a deep sense of self-worth, confidence, and the ability to receive love and care. It embodies a natural willingness to accept good things in life without shame or guilt, celebrating abundance and gratitude.
- Shadow Expression: The shadow spoiled child feels entitled and expects to be given whatever it desires without effort or appreciation. This archetype often struggles with delayed gratification and may react poorly when its needs aren’t instantly met, showing impatience, greed, or resentment.
- Example: An adult who refuses to accept criticism, demands special treatment, or feels that the world “owes” them, becoming upset when things do not go their way.
I know this…i really lived in the shadows of this…impatience greed…struggeling with delayed gratification…it feels like here the biggest change is happening in the last month. And all of the healthy expressions are emerging. a deep sense of self worth and confidence. There is still to grow regarding accepting good things in life without shame and guilt. And to celebrate abundace…I would love to celebrate abundance with my parents…And I start to see, this is what happened at christmas. This is whats happening when we celebrate birthday.
I am definitley growing a lot here. Especially regarding knowing that I need to work hard towards my goal to achieve something
6. The Egocentric Child
- Healthy Expression: When expressed healthily, the egocentric child allows one to value their own thoughts, emotions, and experiences. This archetype encourages self-awareness, self-care, and a positive self-concept, fostering inner strength and a solid sense of self.
- Shadow Expression: In its shadow form, the egocentric child is self-centered, viewing the world only from their perspective. This child archetype may lack empathy, be demanding of others’ attention, or ignore the needs of those around them. It struggles with recognizing others’ experiences as equally valid, leading to isolation and conflict in relationships.
- Example: An individual who talks only about themselves, disregards others’ needs, or reacts with indignation when not the center of attention.
yeah…strong in me…I was so self centered and lacking empathy…but it feels like all of these qualities by them selves got healed as soon as I went from my mamalian brain to my frontal lobe…Since I realized I need structure. Since I realized how bad the dopamine rollercoaster is for me.
7. The Wounded Child
- Healthy Expression: The wounded child archetype embodies the potential for healing and self-compassion. Those with a wounded child archetype often understand suffering and are sensitive to the pain of others, which can inspire a deep sense of empathy and compassion.
- Shadow Expression: In its shadow form, the wounded child becomes stuck in victimhood, using their suffering as a reason to avoid responsibility or personal growth. This can lead to patterns of self-pity, blaming others, and difficulty moving forward.
- Example: An individual who constantly seeks sympathy or uses past pain as an excuse for current behavior, without seeking healing or growth.
Have been there i was so bad in victimhood…and it kept me stuck. This retreat one month ago was all about escaping victimhood and becoming the creator of ones life…and it worked again… I was deeply wounded. And i know now that out of that wound my medicine emerges. Out of that I will provide something to the world. Out of that I will lead people from their own wounds to their medicine. To becoming their own medicine. And spreading that medicine…
Balancing the Child Archetype
To work effectively with these archetypes, it’s important to:
- Recognize and Integrate Both Sides: Understanding how these archetypes manifest in your life can help you appreciate their positive qualities while addressing their shadow forms.
- Cultivate Emotional Intelligence: Developing emotional awareness and self-reflection can help temper the impulsive, reactive tendencies of the child archetype.
- Allow for Growth and Self-Compassion: Embrace the need for self-compassion, while also practicing accountability and resilience. Letting go of entitlement, victimhood, and control can help move these archetypes toward healthy expressions.
The child archetype, in its healthiest form, inspires us to approach life with openness, playfulness, and wonder while maintaining emotional resilience and maturity. Recognizing both the light and shadow aspects of these archetypes offers a path to inner balance, enabling us to embrace the gifts of innocence and joy alongside the wisdom of self-awareness and growth.
This was in interesting journey…
I feel deep relieve that happened in the relationship with my parents.