I think that Alchemist is helping me to bridge the gap between Idea and Action; between Thought and Movement.
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āAfter I do [X], then things will work out; then things will be okay.ā
This is a mistake.
Not the worst mistake in the world, but still a mistake.
It coddles and heeds the mind of desperation, of lack. It feeds a misguided sense of disconnection from what is good, and of disorientation.
The truth? The actual, fundamental problem is only that sense of disconnection and disorientation itself. Not some arbitrary finish-line or some circumstantial threshold which, once passed, indicates that āeverything is okayā.
Yes, continue to work on beneficial practices and growth projects. Itās healthy and right to do that.
But donāt defer success; donāt postpone the mindset of success. Embrace it from wherever you are right here and right now.
Connect, with gratitude, to those aspects of your current circumstances that already embody success, right now.
Accept this challenge.
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Interesting. I just did a ācomplete the pastā meditation and I have been ruminating on this idea over the past hour.
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As I connected with my higher self, this is the message I got:
Be. Have. Do. Give up the battle for your self-worth. Take it as a given. Itās not because of something in the past, itās not because of what you have right now. You are what you are.
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This is a false belief Iāve also struggled with for most of my life. For me itās always been in the form of āOnce I achieve Xā or āAs soon as X happensā or āAfter Iāve solved Xā (insert algebra joke here), or āAfter I get past Xā etc everything will be sunshine and roses.
But it never is.
Because the reality of life is, there are always more things to overcome.
No matter how many times I think about it and recognize that trap, I still fall into it. Some part of my brain still believes, naively, that at any given moment there exists some singular obstacle that, once overcome, will result in everything magically falling into place.
When I was younger and single, the āmountainā was finding the right girl. Then another time it was getting to a particular goal weight/fitness level. Other times itās getting a particular contract or business deal signed. And yes, to be fair, meeting the right girl did solve my insecurities about being forever alone (I was actually only single for a few months before meeting the girl who I later married, but at the time the previous relationship had crashed and burned badly enough to leave me in a deep, dark hole for a whileā¦ but I had company down there, and itās name was vodka. But, I digressā¦ lol), but that was itā¦ it didnāt translate over to everything else in my life like magic.
I keep having to remind myself that Iāve solved nearly all of the problems past me ever faced, in one way or the other, but guess whatā¦ present me still has issues come up, and future me will too. Thatās just life.
Itās summed up beautifully in a Haitian proverb: āBeyond mountains there are mountains.ā Iād originally heard it as āAfter mountain, more mountainsā but I looked up the original translation to quote here.
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Yup. You canāt earn self-worth. Only realize it. 
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āAfter I get my Custom Subliminalā¦ā 
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Same. Iām typing this now as a way to remind myself of the right way to go. I recognize the correctness of what weāre saying here. But truly internalizing it is another matter. For me, it takes effort over time.
Iāve observed for a while that one of the key triggers that gets us is PAIN. Weāre instinctually programmed to respond to pain as ābadnessā, as ānegative judgement of myself or someone elseā. It happens way before conscious thought.
When pain or discomfort happen (or even when we remember or anticipate them happening), itās easy to enter into a reflexive narrative and response (a āscriptā) about how ā[I/You/Something/The World/etc.,] is wrong and needs to be fixedā.
Most of the time all it takes is a little bit of pain (emotional, physical, social, existential) to destabilize our view.
If I follow my angst or my desperation way down to itās tiny sand-grain core, I usually just find a bit of pain or fear of pain that is being compounded out to a huge degree. Iām reacting to that pain, and Iām valorizing whatever I see as equaling the relief of that pain.
Anyway, thatās how I see it.
Either way, it takes time and insight to actually see through some of these things. So, we hang in there and do the best we can as we gradually increase wisdom.
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Yep. Guess what I just received today.
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HI @Lion,
I wanted to start running Asclepius module immediately, and the only place I saw to possibly squeeze that in was in my bedtime use of Regeneration. I decided to create a Regeneration booster custom with just 10 modules. Ordered it on Sunday and it arrived today.
I noticed that my lack/desperation was a bit too high about that and about my other titles. My intuition tells me that Iām making a mistake. But sometimes my body takes a little bit longer with the follow-through.
I analyzed my mistake and wrote a post above to try to remind me of it. Iām still making it right now in real-time. hahaha. But thatās how it goes.
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@Malkuth - I absolutely understand those feelings. Sometimes I have them too although am currently in a good mindplace right now.
Asclepius is so worth it though and canāt wait for you to experience it. So far, I have this feeling of surety for manifesting healing and I already got one manifestation which would help with physical healing by just playing one loop of the custom sub with Asclepius in it.
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Let me know how your eyes go and if they improve. Gonna send you some more healing energies in a minute. 
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Follow that intuition.
I donāt practise Ritual Magick, but like our fellow Dowsers, Iām sure you must have some way to take the help of a āSubliminal Modules Selection Specialistā. 
Ask for what fits your current needs, and that the quantity be limited to 20.
Also, expect to have your mind blown about why some of those werenāt selected - which your rational mind would have definitely picked.
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haha, itās very funny that you mention this.
this is precisely what happened.
I used the Yijing/I Ching (ęē¶ or åØę) to help me select the modules in this custom. I donāt usually do that. In fact, I donāt usually use the Yijing very much anymore. Used it a damn lot over the past 20 years. I feel like when you use things like that theyāre a scaffold for your own intuition. And itās good sometimes to put them down and just use your own gut. So, Iāve been doing that more over the past 2 or 3 years. From time to time, though, my own mind feels too implacid ( that may not be a word. canāt think of another word for that right now), so Iāll still consult the åØę.
Anyway, used the Yijing to get feedback on my modules. Actually asked about each one. Ended up removing Gratitude Embodiment and DEUS. Interesting. Also, I was planning to get standard build for this to keep things light. Yijing said ānoā. So, went for Terminus. Yijing said ānoā. Asked about Terminus2. Yijing said āgreat!ā
So, this Regeneration/Asclepius booster Custom is in Terminus2.
Hereās the final version:
Iām calling it DUAT - Regeneration Booster
Module List
Regeneration Core
Asclepius
Blue Skies
Negativity Displacer
Energetic Development XI
Apollon
The Flow
Dream Traveler
The Architect
Deep Sleep
Mosaic
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Kind ofā¦
I meant TOTAL 20 - replacing everything - PATHS, IMBUE, DUAT, QL, AL, Regen, Stark, ā¦ evveeeything.
Thatās a LOT of coin tossing. 
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ah. thatās not gong to happen right now. Iām locked in. This is what I want. And Iām actually feeling benefits. So, Iām not thinking of changing.
Took a lot of time and experiences to get to this point.
Instead, my focus now is on Conscious level strategies.
The subconscious strategies feel good. Honestly, thereās even more. Because there are more than just subliminals going on. I trust my gut with this area.
The current growth area is shifting to feel a similar sense of space, agency and prosperity around conscious actions and strategies. If I donāt manage that so well, maybe youāll see me back here again, regrouping.
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