yes the divine images some how are a result of apex paragon and transcendence 2 (not just transcendence2). because i ran just transcendence2 for a week and hardly any divine images. listen to 30 seconds of HS , 3 min of transcendence 2, 30 sec of apex paragon, and its working. i’m not sure what exactly is triggering them but its really real stuff i’m seeing.
current stack is
9/10 times, 3 minute max but more often just 30 sec to 1 minute every other day
going to start daily journaling on here again…
Last night was epic in terms of dreams.
I think it’s kinda funny how dynamic my spirit can be at times. I’ve gotten pretty good at recovering from low vibrational activities like porn and anger. But I’m still not over them. That’s mainly what is holding me back.
The imagery exercises and the dos disks are super powerful tho.
Still running transcendence 2, apex paragon, and HS.
Last night I watch porn and since it’s been awhile since I’ve done that, it did last long. But I new my dreams would be crap because they always are after I watch porn. Even when I do it in the morning. So I did some imagery exercises (3 random ones) then after I put the dos disks on a went to sleep.
It was one of those where you don’t even go unconscious, I just arrived in the dream world. Several high dimensional experiences like several void passes, space ships, sacred temples, water, past lives and images of Atlantis (very big city) and I was listening to this conversation of other people talking. Something about earth and revolution. Every thing last night was as real as waking life.
In terms of improvement, I just need to meditate more. More merkaba meditation, imagery exercises, neurofeedback, chakra balancing and CFTH.
I’ve started a few chapters of mantak chia books. Learning that is a big tool for what I’m going for.
There’s a powerful synergy with HS and transcendence2. Like if I can get the exposure just right, it’s a radiant love I can sustain in meditation
More updates soon
things I’ve learn about dreams:
The different levels of dreaming
Level 1: nightmares, repetitive, and busy dreams
Level 2: clearing dreams (clearing negative emotions/images)
Level 3: Great dreams (heaven/angels/etc)
Level 4: Light dreams (mainly white light and other geometries)
Level 5: union with God (everywhere at once)
Things dreams can tell you
aspects of dreams
Dream sequences don’t appear to our consciousness as a bundle of nonsense. They have a more
or less understandable story line. Although the story line might not make logical sense (one moment
| am walking upside down up some spindly stairs going toward the sky, the next | am crouching in
a basement deep in the earth), it still appears as a linear progression. Write your dream as you re-
member seeing it. When you write your dream down in your DreamBook, avoid short cuts. You want
your reader— your dream companion or company —to be able to “see,” to follow in their mind’s eye,
the sequences of images that you describe.
Every story line has a pattern. We will note without judgment the patterns in our dreams. All we seek
to do here is identify patterns; we are not yet trying to understand.
Pattern can be a map. The east, west, north, south orientations of the dream are patterns that we
note.
Pattern can be opposites: man and woman (| am a woman). Black (coat) and white (truck); night
and white truck.
What is the real question the dream is trying to figure out? This is the hardest level to home into.
The dream has a motivating purpose; it is trying to resolve something. Let’s go back to the man who
hates his mother and the synagogue. While this was not a night dream, it was a repetitive motif he
brought up every time he came to see me. You will come to see that there is little difference between
a person’s repetitive stories and their repetitive dreams. Your friends’ repetitive stories are like bad
dreams, and you must consider them as such. What was the real question here? What was the man
looking for? Hating his mother suggested that she had rejected him. He equated the synagogue,
where she went regularly, to his mother. In his mind they were one and the same. He had put them
both in the same bag. The question was: Where can | find loving support in a trustworthy environ-
ment? Clarifying the true question of the dream is already pointing us to what | call “responding to
the necessity of the dream.”
Here the dream companions pause and wait. If they have opened the dream appropriately (becoming the secondary dreamers of the dream, they have described what they feel about the dream, and what they feel its true question is), the original dreamer will be touched. His/her (the original dreamer) response signifies whether or not the treasure has been accessed, and the original dreamer feels relieved and
enlightened.
Reversing (the most important imagery exercise)
Do this every night without fail. Do it in bed, with your eyes closed, just before going to
sleep: Look at your day backwards, as if rewinding the tape of your day. When you come
upon a difficult encounter with someone, go stand in that person’s shoes. Look at yourself
from that person’s vantage point. When you see clearly how you were behaving, return to
your body and continue reversing the day’s events. If you fall asleep, remember that the
brain doesn’t sleep, and it will continue reversing. You will wake up refreshed, your bur-
dens lightened.
Essentially, see images of your day in reverse and fix an image if you don’t like it while you are going to sleep
if you can do this while dreaming, amazing things can happen.
Also if you rotate 90 degrees to your right I’m pretty sure you go up a dimensional level ( or overtone) and turning 90 degrees to your left goes down. But if you don’t have strong enough field around you it might be undesirable in both directions.
Turning 90 down or up is un explored territory and is really heavy / advanced stuff. So don’t do tho unless you for sure know what you are doing.
As you are falling asleep, your start to see images. If you see an image you don’t like your can do the following, shrink the image and sweep it to the LEFT out of your field of vision. For me I see a bunch sometimes and you are actually able to sweep images to the left very fast and it just takes intention. So what I do is I just say to myself “I’m going to sweep any negative images to the left until I see images of light” and I do that with intention until I fall asleep. I don’t necessarily have to see the images, it’s just my intention that keeps it going. And it works most of the time
recon rants vol 761523
today was a bad day to stay in my room all day. sometime i ask myself how do i even live like this. like don’t get me wrong my job is great because there’s hardly work to do. like yesterday i watched Dune and today blue beetle. just so many slow days. and i wouldn’t even want to actually work a busy job. I just don’t care enough to care about working. I think some people my age understand.
I need to get a life. some how.
on one hand i really want to go all the way with ascension and the merkaba but its really hard sometimes. (especially when you have no friends even remotely interested in this stuff). at the same time, i know its real because i’ve had far too many experience. it really seems like my only way out is with my merkaba and CFTH. because everything here is just dull in comparison. and at the same time i’m super fing lonely. ever since covid nothing has been the same.
but i know if i get a girlfriend , it’s just more stress because humans are messy. but i want one nonetheless
god i don’t want kids. i just want to live my life. being a guy is hard. mainly because if i keep doing the same thing that i’m doing everyday, nothing would happen. nothing comes to me unless i have to make it happen.
for some reason, i don’t know why, I just don’t want to live like that. there has to be a better way. i just want things to work. i’m tired of completion.
the only way I can think of a way is via CFTH. but that is truly hard work. A) it takes a ton of courage just to attempt to try it. and B) when it obviously doesn’t happen, it just makes me want to give up. but then i’m stuck back here. and all at the same time, i know its possible without a shadow of a doubt.
i remember one of my last dreams before i woke up was a light dream. i was surrounded by an endless ocean / void of white light and in the center i saw a black fractal (Mandelbrot)
went to the handpan store today. played some awesome tunes on their only good pan. it sounds amazing. its d major and i have a d minor. thinking about selling the minor and getting the major. or just selling the one and saving up for the all mighty nordlys 14. that would be better long term. but that one is like 5000
also i think i figured out how wanted aura works. it does something to the lower Dantian. i find when i pull the sexual energy during orgams i can ignite it. i think that is a characteristic of an attractive man. the inner fire.
while walking around today, i was really mad at myself for not talking to attractive girls passing me by. there are soo many beautiful girls. its basically the only way i’m going to meet someone. and i literally think some girl said hi to me but she was so quiet that i kept on walking. i think i’m not afraid of talking to girls. i’m just not yet comfortable going up to random girls because i’m attracted to them. i also have no idea how to escalate.
but this evening i looked in the mirror and was like damn i’m freakin attractive.
i ordered a new custom yesterday:
Heartsong Core
WANTED Black Core
BDLM Core
Song of Joy
Sexual Manifestation
Eyes of Zenith
Instant Spark
Approachability Aura
Symphony of the Glyphs
Male Enhancement
Deep Sleep
Prevent Premature Ejaculation
Mosaic
last night i breifly had another dream where i was Creating from my heart. I closed my eyes, when into my heart, saw white ish light and felt the energetic power going through my whole being. but then i woke up eventually and was disappointed because i realized it was dreaming. also had a dream where i was in Minnesota. why Minnesota? i have no idea. i never even visited the state, but i was telling my friends there that i missed the nature and beautiful colored leaves on the trees. and that i was so tired of living in the city. i said its so grey there.
it appears my dreams know me better than i know myself lol
More depression. So desperate for real connection. Tried talking to some girl at the store today but she didn’t speak English
today was pretty bad. yesterday i listened to 3 min of AP and 3 min of Transcendence 2. today i felt super lonely and did nothing at work (there was nothing to do at all). I’m just so done with this chapter of my life. this world feels brutal some times
oh and i did a little merkaba meditation at work today. that was fine. nothing to write home about but worth noting
today was much better. i was my normal happy self. i did some neurofeedback today once at lunch and one 30 minute before 6. but were solid. I’ve been running apex paragon and transcendence2 for a while now and I can really feel my 3rd eye energy more often. i really want to stick with these 2 subs bec there is a powerful effect when you don’t switch your stack every month. its like a doubling of power effect.
when i was doing the neurofeedback with the flameinmind app, i was listening to the alpha waves and breathing prana in the central channel (prana tube). when i do that, its almost like i’m a lantern and i’m lighting up my inner vision. i started to actually see (not visualize) a new world while being conscious like i am now.
i did a dos disk session this morning but i didn’t end up falling asleep which is strange. I’m also thinking of uploading ALL of my imagery exercises to a undisclosed soundcloud account.
so my custom hasn’t even come yet but i feel like the effects are manifesting already. when i look in the mirror i just feel like damn (then i look at my belly haha)
new custom just arrived. lets gooooo
I’m going to call this one Wanted Heart (so creative i know lol)
as for when my first micro loop will be, i’ll use my intuition. maybe this weekend.
today was a pretty normal day. hardly any work to do at work. my contract is ending in January so i need to figure that out. if not its back to the states.
i thought of an app idea and it actually has some good potential so i started working on it nonchalantly at work. got some decent progress done.
i find myself agreeing too much to other people. so i just need to be myself and not a yes man lol.
healthy beams of light = pure images from the heart
woke up feeling different today. like i can actually choose the things I want in life
peace of mind is everything
first day of listening to everything:
30 sec of transcendence 2
30 sec of AP
30 sec of WH
Monday i listened to 3 min of transcendence2 and apex paragon. that was probably to much for me. i honestly don’t think i’ll ever get too a full 15 minute loop lol
another wave of this
side note: i need to remember everything more. like i’ll have these level 3 dreams and days will go by and i’ll just now remember them. same for meditations. so i can do 2 things: journal and practice reversing
What is remembered lives on – Collete
yesterday i bought smoky quartz crystal. i had a dream a while back and in it I had a clear quartz, smoky quartz and amethyst. the only one i was missing was a smokey quartz until now.
so yesterday i was doing a dos disk session and the smokey quartz was a foot or so above my head on my orgone generator. i had forgotten that i put it there. in the session i was in this trance and i heard this female voice above me and she was putting these cool waves of energy over my head. i think in general, my mental activity is higher than others, so this was relaxing. also my hand chakras were spinning really really really fast. but they were stable
got some classic recon of male loneliness. I’m starting to think that its not a girlfriend i want, but inner peace.
did merkaba meditation back to back at lunch at work today while using flameinmind app. my main focus was feeling sacred love. you can’t fake that. i was listening to my alpha waves and there was a steady alpha signal when i was doing the prana tube breathing. also at work i got really sleepy (prob because of my crappy sleep schedule) and i closed my eyes and i was dreaming right there sitting up straight, not ideal but worth noting
tomorrow i will be listening to
wanted heart
transcendence 2
apex paragon
also last night i had a dream where i was talking with some people and this one girl i was talking to had the most interesting sliver diamond eyes. i asked her some questions and she said i was in the andromeda galaxy. i ask her shouldn’t i be in the milkyway galaxy? and she immediately replied that the andromeda galaxy is always in a close connection with the milky way galaxy. doing some googling at work i found it is actually the closest galaxy from us. she also gave me a few planets that we live on, one she said was called “home” . before that there was this big solar flare going on where it was getting very bright. i can actually reverse the dream pretty far back just using my memory. reversing with images is really powerful
I think i may need to back off and remove one of the customs from my stack 
i did lots of cleaning in my room today. also i had such bad sleep last night i took a half sick day for work. still there was nothing for me to do at work.
my contract is set to end in January, so i’ll either have it renewed and stay in the city or move back to Michigan and get back on the job search. or i’ll find a new job here in Montreal with a new work permit.
i’m going to drop apex paragon. even tho its a great custom, i need to focus on dating. wanted black has fat burning in it so that’s the main thing I wanted to use it for. and just for the record i haven’t seen any actual fat burning/reduction and i’ve been running that since at least august