Not me feeling left out or anything… 
I’ve been secretly reading it aha.
I’ll catch up!
Oh I might have wrote it wrong - I’m not afraid of losing him, I’d be sad if I did but I’m not afraid. I feel like the lines are getting mixed up though.
I need to write my goals down but I’m hella tired.
But one goal I DEFINITELY want to focus on, two actually is:
Making content for my TikTok/Instagram and using Stark to get known and them followers.
I need to get out of my head and caring what people will think of how many likes I’ll get
I’m hoping DR and Stark can work on this belief for sure. It seems like something they can do.
Another goal is:
Start eating better and working out again.
I hate diets with a passion and I don’t want to follow anything that has a restriction so I’m going to allow myself to eat what I want and follow my gut instinct but I need to cut down on shitty foods/take aways and learn more thing to cook.
Loosely going to follow a nutrition guide from Beach body and also one of their programs, Transform 20. I need to get back into shape.
Anyway, its rest day from the subs now so it’s time to rest and not take anymore subs in. Let’s see the magic work and them process!
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You wont be disappointed, i did this during my health journal with the right subs you will be fine.
Transforms 20 really helped me out have to do it next year again
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I’ve done Beachbody stuff for a long while but have taken break from it since June 
Transform 20 is great for sure but I’ve never finished any of their programs except Insanity Max 30.
Did you follow the nutrition guide?
Ive finish a lot of beachbody product including insanity mac 30
Nope i just kept track of my own eating habits and ate very health making sure i got enough nutrients
Oh really? That’s sweet, I used to do the coaching thing with them so I’ve done a lot of their programs, just barely ever finished them.
Yeah I’m just going to try and eat healthier since I eat a lot of junk and I’m trying to be better.
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Today was a rest day.
I felt so good today. I had a great day. Happy, around good energy and seperated myself from any horrible energy that was around, had a laugh with a good friend of mine who is going through her own trauma and healing process (without subs, but I told her about these!).
Yesterday I started something I was super hesitant with starting - a group dance piece. I’ve been super fucking scared of putting together a piece of dance where there’s transitions and formations but I did it. I haven’t finished it and it’s something we’re working on for next week but I started to change bits of choreo on the spot and adding things together and working stuff and I’m happy with it so far. Can’t wait to see the final product.
I put the creativity help down to Stark. I choreographed the piece quite quickly and found where the pocket sat nicely and I’m believing Stark really helped with that.
I continued to choreograph things, fix and change things today with my friend and it’s working so I’m happy. More work to do but nothing stark won’t help me with.
I told you guys I upped my loops too, to 2 DR, 3 Stark and Khan. Well, I’ll be moving them back down to 1. I’ll still be listening whilst I sleep (I was hella tired and can feel the processing hitting me hard since it’s been hard to wake up recently) but I know it’s working.
Maximum loops will be 2 per sub throughout the night tho. Just out of pure convience. Reading Saint’s posts and posts about people using Ultima’s through the night gives me evidence that this still works through sleep.
I’ve also been messaging and speaking to people on here and the general consensus is that 1 loop per sub is enough for results and ones that are sustainable.
DR, except yesterday, has been seemingly helpful with life and this week has been one of my happier weeks - still downs but a great week to be honest. I’m excited for the continued use and that my life can be taking action.
However I may need some of your guys help on action that I can take for certain things I want to achieve.
For example I’ve made a Tiktok and I’m determined to get to 1 million followers by following trends and uploading videos of myself doing my own choreography etc.
I then want to use my Tiktok to help me get to at least 10k followers on Instagram.
I’ve got so many goals but I don’t want to overwhelm myself.
However… I’m so excited to keep journaling my journey.
I’m happy right now.
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I’ve got a couple things to add in different posts so I’m not totally disorganised on what I’m writing but wanted to write a few reminders of what I need to add:
- Need to talk about some manifestations (wealth wise)
- Need to talk about some possible Khan thoughts in regards to matches and type
- Need to talk about my goals that I want to focus on.
Some of my goals have slightly changed however so I’m really honing in on them.
I’m focusing on manifestations happening as I really want to manifest some great shit leading up to Christmas/New Year rather than relying just on subs/action - I mean I want to put effort into visualising and all that kinds of stuff.
Therefore, I’m adding Minds Eye to my stack and replacing StarkQ with StarkT (possibly) to once a week.
DR
Khan Stage 3
Mind’s Eye
X 1 loop per day
StarkT x 1 per week
Yesterday was an absolute rollercoaster train wreck.
If you saw my thoughts on the forum yesterday then my dear lord you’ll know how messy my head was in terms of making stupid mistakes.
The start of the day was great, I had incredible energy and I was totally here for it - maintained my vibe and had a great day…
Then it went down south as I had training.
The sound from my iPad to the HDMI cable wasn’t working so whilst everybody else was training (since we have to do a dance company through zoom) I was riding the sound for the TV. The sound was coming from the iPad but it wouldn’t fill the studio for everyone to hear so I spent 40 minutes of training fixing it…
So that was the start, then my teacher kind of annoyed me considering I’d spent the last 40 minutes getting the convience of sound right for everyone who had just trained getting what he wanted right, I got 5 minutes to get it…he told me not to get angry and everything but praised everyone else and I was just there like…
I’ve noticed he praises pretty much everyone, his guy students are all from the same university except for me so he has a connection with them and he comes across like he has a thing for praising girls a lot too and then there’s me, the guy that doesn’t fall into either category so I’m just like the odd one out already.
So after he annoyed me everything went south and I got angry and frustrated because it made me think so much of how I’m not appreciated and how people think I’m a shit dancer, when I’m really not and I work just as hard as everybody else pushing myself if not harder and everyone else puts in less and gets praised. It fucks me off so much.
My work gets attention but I also know people think I’m not good, and all this kinds of stuff so that mixed with Khan made my frustration go through the roof because I’m.not here for feeling my worth being degraded.
I’m starting to really evaluate and cut people/things out of my life that are pissing me off. Guy number one is ‘thinking’ about things and annoying me so I’ve deactivated my Facebook so he can’t reach me via our normal route and it’ll mean he has to contact me another way if he really wants to contact me. I doubt he will but…
I didn’t just deactivate because of him though, social media is really just pissing me off too much recently and I’m not here for it. So I’m deactivating Instagram too. The absolute selfishness I’m seeing I’m just like…okay. Facebook and Instagram are beyond frustrating me. Whilst is sounds contradicting I’ll be keeping my Tiktok open since the community (whilst still toxic in defense) are more loving and open also and I can meet new people since I don’t follow ANYONE I know on it except my boyfriend.
The evaluation of everything I’m feeling is stressing me out but also what I need to make my life better.
Anyway, another thing that I feel is happening with Khan is that my ‘type’ of guy is being opened up. I’m normally so picky with the type of guy I want and I’ve been seeing more and more guys who I’m finding attractive on Tinder and making friends since I don’t feel like I have an actual ‘circle’ except my boyfriend and one person (that’s my pure point at the moment - making friends rather than anything truly romantic or sexual).
This is something I’m truly starting to notice more and more and it’s good.
I’m glad about it.
Anyway, someone please tell me how I can detach myself emotionally from people. I feel I give too much emotionally to people when I want their friendship so I find it hard to not be messaging someone when I’m bored or whatever or waiting to see if they messaged me…how can I detach from that? I don’t want to be that person which is also why I’m deactivating my socials.
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Woke up early again.
My Apple Watch app Autosleep (great fucking app on my opinion if you want to track your sleep) has been telling me that I’m in a sleep debt from this/last week. Apparently I’m 23.1% in debt of sleep.
It’s telling me I need a total of 14 hours and 1 minute sleep to get out of this debt. I’m excited for my nap later now aha.
Thought some of you guys would want to see the data.
Anywho, I’ve told myself I have to workout today and after a mouse woke me up by nibbling at something in a draw I told myself to workout in the morning and get it out the way so that’s all done.
I feel good, sore (which I don’t normally feel during workouts which shows how long I haven’t done it for) but good. It’s put me in a better mood.
Played DR, Khan Stage 3 and Minds Eye last night whilst I slept. Each at 1 loop.
I also had the worse sleep ever the week I decided to do subs during the day compared to subs during sleep.
Mind’s Eye, already after 1 loop I’m being more visual - seeing things in my head more and can see a bit more of a picture - this is coming from someone who isn’t the most visual of people in terms of making a picture. I can see things but they’re not super clear or the full picture or whatever else.
This is going to help me make some great choreography and all that stuff. I’m happy about that so far.
Truly going to start doing what @SubliminalUser does and write down their goals, read them and visualise them.
This is a concept I read from the book The Lazy Man’s Way to Riches by Joe Karbo where you write down everything you want, read it and visualise it happening so this is something I’m going to work on with Minds Eye.
I know this technique is something most know already but I want to use it with Joe’s way as when I did this before I had massive visualization issues.
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Can you feel the difference between the rtages of khan ?
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I did with Stage 2, Stage 2 was complete and utter hell at one point for a good few weeks and it really fucked me up. My mental health really took a turn for a worse and now I can understand why it has a warning sign for it because it makes you question EVERYTHING. It was truly fucking difficult and I believe it’s a good reason for you to stay on Stage 1 as long as possible @pacman.
I didn’t ‘feel’ Stage 1. Stage 3 I feel happier on. I feel a push for action which can be difficult sometimes but it’s given me a lot of matches on Tinder and all that kinds of stuff but I haven’t gotten sex or what I like off it yet. I still have a lot of negative beliefs that I’m hoping to break down with DR.
But I can’t say I’m not getting some kind of results. I’m more open sexually, I’m more social, my worth is gradually increasing, I’m taking more action towards those things, I’ve manifested some wealth even if it’s small things for example I got two checks come through the door last week and they were the most random cheques I ever received.
One from my old bank that I had issues with but never put anything through sent me a cheque and my old phone provider who I haven’t been with for about 3 years sent me one too…
I’m probably oblivious to other results that I’m getting as I’m that kind of person at the moment but Khan is working - my stack is dense and it’ll take some time but it’s working most definitely and I can feel stuff happening. If my stack was purely just Khan like yours is this I’d get quicker results.
I’m definitely sticking with Khan for a long while but may take a month break from it and stay with Minds Eye, DR and Stack T (once a week) to come back to Stage 2 of Khan. I haven’t decided.
Keep doing what you’re doing @pacman, you’re doing amazing. Keep working for that 90 day goal. I know you want to switch and you’re looking for results but you’ll get there. Please take it from me, don’t switch. Stay with it and you’ll be rewarded massively.
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Oh I forgot to add, it might be DR but it’s probably Khan, it’s starting to make me not give a shit about people in terms of I can see how people are treating me and I’m evaluating and cutting people off that aren’t giving me the same effort.
I’m becoming aware of what my worth should be and getting there - slowly but surely and that’s going to make people become aware of my worth and who I am as a person and that they shouldn’t fuck with me. Too many people take advantage of my kindness and Khan is making me see that.
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Thanks buddy!
Very motivational
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Thats def happing to me every day lol
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Always brother. If you need a pep talk or whatever else you’ve got the whole forum to count on, tag me whenever you need to dude. Stay the course. I’m ready to hear about your results.
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@pacman i second this the community is there for anyone who need the support, we will be there for you, we are at times running the same of different sub it does matter we can chime in from time to time to support, we got you
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The community is amazing, and we always band together regardless of what sub we’re using or what journey we’re since we’re all here for mainly one thing - to better our lives and future. That’s what I think is so magical about this community.
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So guys, there’s someone I’m talking to from Tinder, I just have a great spark with…he’s great, we have a lot of similar interests and all sorts…this is big for me…
I’ve literally known him two days but the connection is just there and he’s so lovely. He hasn’t asked me for fun/nudes or anything (which is what most gay guys do on apps like Tinder…). Obviously I’m looking for guys to do stuff with but I’m also looking for friends and whatever happens happens but he’s great for sure.
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