Thoughts and Rambles

Journals - Major Programs
#221

Had a quick dream two nights ago about realizing I hadn’t responded to my friend in two days, so I did that and thought how my sense of time must be messed up since I swore it had only been a few hours. Ended up texting him yesterday and we actually caught up a bit.

Had a quick dream last night about running into a friend I haven’t seen in months. So quick/uneventful that I didn’t even write it down in my journal this morning. Guess who I just so happened to run into today? I didn’t even remember the dream earlier, but it came back to me the moment I saw them because of how strong the deja vu was. Different circumstances/place, but the exact same feeling as I recognized them.

EDIT: I’m also seeing angel numbers almost every hour that they exist. I’m usually really skeptical of that kind of thing but it’s just been going on and on for days. The only day I was more cognizant of the time and checking it often, I saw literally every one except for 4:44. Trippy.

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#222

Made a new name embed the other night. RM Vibes Stage 4 with Synergy: Divine Dominion. Figured that now with RAIKOV helping with school stuff and serving as a general life management subliminal, I had the freedom to switch off of ASBR for a little bit (although technically I’m still getting much of the same scripting). Still ZPQ so it fills the same niche.

A ton of processing dreams last night. I took sleep meds and gave myself a full 12 hours so it doesn’t feel surprising. I was directly talking to the part of my intuition/subconscious that processes RAIKOV during a decent amount of them, so I know I made the right choice with these past few combinations. In between one of the dreams, I was watching the pitch blackness of my vision, and its depth started moving a little bit. Like a ripple in the space in front of me. Looking forward to more Divine Dominion results since even though it’s a manifestation module, it still deals a lot with personal power and authority. Status too.

I’m not overloaded or in recon at all, which is very reminiscent of the older days. RAIKOV does its thing, and combined with Clear Sight helps me clearly see and understand processing and the changes. Today, it felt as though the script was a maze I was cleanly navigating through, as if it’s just natural. Having the thought of “alignment is easier than fighting” as well. Compared to when I buffed ASBR months ago, this is bearable and natural. In one of the dreams, I compared it to a class that was just one level above the one I stopped at, and was looking for a TA to help explain it to me. To not get into the nitty gritty, it’s basically like me already understanding the basics and data structures I’m working with, just needing to get used to interpreting them on more specific (and higher?) levels. ASBR on the other hand was an impossible riddle I thought I had no idea how to solve. Even when I listened yesterday, I was able to meditate with it without getting “kicked out.”

I feel like the new name embed rules are nice, but I actually like the ones I’ve made so far. I don’t necessarily want Mind’s Eye to be the main objective, I want its features to serve RAIKOV, and it’s been doing it beautifully so far, so I’m unsure if I’d ever change that in the future. I’ve wanted to work with Divine Domination for a while too, and its concept doesn’t seem to be covered too well by any other store title, and I’d like it to serve RMV. Eventually I’ll probably make a WDB + Limitless: Polyglot one, or I could make it a custom since I was eyeing a few modules I think would work very well for it. RoW + RICH will come eventually though.

Still the synchronicities and things I mentioned earlier. Doing well. I’ve actually been more hungry today, so I’m finally understanding that symptom of processing that people were talking about. A little bit sleepier, but I’m also catching up on sleep from the past week so it makes sense. I solved a code thing earlier that my lab can use for the future the next time the issue comes up. It feels like I can’t not learn.

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#223

Super interesting, instead of my normal 3-5 minute WDB microloop, my intuition told me to try something closer to 10 minutes. Started to feel really good around the 9 minute mark. I know that if anything, RAIKOV is helping me skip over some of the more tedious parts of change and letting me integrate what I want without resistance. I guess I wanted some of the “deeper”/more in depth scripting that comes later in the loop.

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#224

Some aspects of Stark Black feel like developing a city I don’t have access to yet. If running a sub is like developing multiple different cities/hubs in your mind, then taking action is what allows you to get to that city, see results directly in that area, and change your beliefs/identity in respect to that. Without it, it’s not as if the city doesn’t develop, but you won’t be able to give the full extent of input as if you were there. That’s what the waking world is for, putting yourself in situations that mirror the sub. Hoping that since RM Vibes 4 is similar to Stark Black in structure, but specified to situations I’m in a lot more, I’ll begin to explore those specific cities more in depth. Eventually, when I run it again, it’ll be able to generalize and I can experience the same success in multiple different areas.

RoD + Regen are also coming to mind as a nice combination, my personal belief of what a true anti-recon custom would be like. Maybe RoM would work too, but I never ran it for long enough to give real input on it. Those along with Clear Sight, some happiness modules, and some introspective modules would be wonderful. I still can’t speak to RAIKOV yet since I’m still very much in the thick of changes and could be biased, but if it’s promoting conscious-subconscious communication to the point that I refer to it in my dreams as I’m processing, I think it’s definitely one to consider as well. So many good combinations, so few slots to achieve them. Even if I can handle an extra sub or two, RoD is its own beast that I can’t juggle at the same time as school and other commitments, which is why RAIKOV is so attractive. With Clear Sight, it’s improving my dream quality, letting me explore my mind in the same way I would with RoD, and integrate changes and even jump past processing stages since it’ll let me embody something so long as it’s clearly described and laid out. We’ll see how the next few months look. Might be a blessing in disguise that the upgrade won’t come until next season (hopefully a year from now) when I have more bandwidth and freedom for full-send inner exploration.

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#225

Looks like today’s about blending the Dream Current with authenticity and my emotional state. Looking forward to see how the internal becomes external. Had a dream about breaking down the feel of each constituent module in the Synergy, so I’m probably still making full sense of that one. Some related dreams, but still learning the overall expression of it.

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#226

Tidbits of a subconscious conversation from last night. One of the reasons that I can’t just receive all the information my subconscious has is because it would limit my conscious decisions. A ton of results are gained from ignoring those subconscious thoughts. Ignoring fear and taking a leap of faith, a decision made from careful deduction and calculation, the breezy “I don’t care” attitude that lets you become so much more robust to change. In order to handle more information and stronger intuition, I just have to become that much stronger consciously. Not to let myself get drowned out and bogged down by information, but to integrate and innovate. To be the person I always am. To do exactly what consciousness does best.

In terms of the specific ZPU feature Saint talked about, I know it has to do with internal getting translated external. The RICH post talked a lot about asking questions to yourself and journaling to get to the exact structures that hold meaning, so something like that I believe. In a way, it could be like how the anti-recon speeds up recon in that it makes you more consciously aware of the processes going on. Need to catch up on Azriel’s journal though, I’m like a year behind lmao.

EDIT: If specifically those two are close to figuring it out, it likely has to do with the immediate externalization of internal processes. Saint said before how he loves reading salespeople’s results because they immediately get to see what works and what doesn’t, because they’re immediately thrown into action and testing the new beliefs and mental structures formed. Which would also relate to the journaling and vision board followed with great results that immediately followed.

One more edit to add that if they were waiting for this kind of support scripting upgrade before increasing the density, it most definitely has to do with revealing all subconscious structures associated to what you’re processing at the moment. Laying out what you want, why you really want that, what caused you to really want that, and then the layer underneath again of what you really want. That kind of process super emphasized. I’ve kinda been putting this off with WDB thanks to shiny sub and “wow I can do this with RAIKOV” syndrome. But it fundamentally makes sense. Almost like a line/path of logic that gets drawn. You find the exact end result of what you really want with wealth and explore its intricacies. Now explore what’s holding you back. No, what’s really holding you back that you don’t want to admit. Same exact process as before. Now, you have the two structures and are intimately aware of the paths and relations between the two. Now that you have those consciously aware and in a way you can clearly state, you know exactly where to work on and what you can do to get to that exact place. I kinda fell off on this with WDB at the going deeper step, since it got a little painful going into things, so my path hasn’t been as direct. However, I’m fortunate enough that my new path just so happens to be going exactly into this. Literally from my personal journal last night and the night before, I talked about digging deep and moving fast on these Dream Boy concepts to find the exact points of hurt that existed and to resolve them. I guess it isn’t necessarily resolving in my head though, it’s finding the clear line between the conscious action I can do now and that hurt that exists in order to change the pre-existing limiting belief. Don’t care too much about how “correct” I am since I know this is a mechanism that exists and feels more prevalent now, so I’ll be working with it anyway. The goal is super fast change that I can look back on six months in the future and be like “damn, I did that much??” If I had to guess, a physical mechanism could be with journaling or creating some physical world equivalent to the subconscious expression so that it can be consciously understood.

I’ve spent way too long typing this and am going to eat my muffin now before this meeting.

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#227

I’m stupid and could’ve sworn that I had a meeting but… I’m free! My downfall will forever be my productivity existing on a very wide scale surrounded by me doing nothing 80% of the time and getting immense amounts of things done in the 20%. Works for creative stuff and writing, but frequent meetings help me keep it under control for things that involve working with other people.

I also know for a fact that I was connected with my intuition when I figured this out:

since I had a super strong urge to bring my laptop and charger with me to class even though I didn’t need them. Turns out I forgot to charge my iPad last night and I had the perfect seat next to an outlet in my first class. Maybe a nice small thing, but it’s not as if I need to take notes in my classes every day, just in general but especially as RAIKOV helps me map the knowledge I’m getting immediately. But then, I end up getting a text from my friend that she’ll be missing one of our classes and asked me to take good notes. Absolutely insane read since this is one of the classes I just don’t take notes in some days, so I’m really proud of that.

I also got a nice visualization of how information can work last night. Similar to my city example, learning information about a subject can be like building a building. You get the barebones of it from the start, and begin to refine it, make it functional, and even expand and renovate it over time. A lot of people (including past me) treat it like a zero-sum game. You learn it to forget it after the class ends, you create a structure that won’t last and that’s made to be torn down later. Why though? The human brain isn’t that limited that we need to tear things down the moment we don’t need them anymore. We have nigh on infinite storage capacity, so why not make the building to last? Sure, it may look like a crap ton of construction and an ugly building by architecture standards, but it’s still functional isn’t it? I may not need organic chemistry or discrete math immediately for the next year, but what about the rare situation that comes up where it would be insanely useful? Now I can go back to that stable foundation, make it like home again and either continue building it or begin to refine it, renovate it, or make it look prettier (as a metaphor for finetuning the knowledge and making it specialized to whatever context I’m in).

I’m very biased to these kinds of metaphors since I like exploring my mind as a person exploring real physical spaces. My first processing dream was literally me in a huge shopping mall like place where a ton of information was flying by super efficiently (and that I was playing mario kart in). Love that I’m free for the day, I can be efficient and catch up on manga for 3 hours and actually do work for 2…

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#228

@Athanaxos this is my guess as to what’s happening though.

#229

Currently working through processing RM right now. It’s so weird being in a no-recon state. Normally when I feel it, it’s like an instant victory. I can immediately track down where the feeling is coming from, relate it to the title, and go back to where in my childhood the original belief was formed.

But this? It’s like walking around in a dark room with headphones. I have to move intuitively and follow my instinct and deeper feelings. I know I’m doing better with it now because I have the perfect title to help, but it’s still a lot like unraveling something I don’t know the form of. Writing this just because I think I started to latch onto something. It’s like the sub goes deeper than words, in a place where I have no eyes and few context clues to go off of. Just a few extremely subtle thoughts or impulses that may or may not lead me down the right train of thought. Even then, it isn’t conscious thought that resolves it. I have to give my subconscious a train of feelings and meanings. If the question isn’t verbal, the answer can’t be either. It’s like I’m learning a new language and speaking it on the spot through trial and error. I know I can derive a method once I’ve done this once. I know I can solve it now. It’s just a lot of following feelings that feel a little good, leading to more that feel good, that somehow lead to an answer that I can relate back to the subliminal. And then I have to make it more robust, spread the feeling, until I have a complete answer and feel of what I’m trying to embody on a deep level. Embodiment is probably how I’d describe my ZPQ experience over the past few months. It was really hard to be aware of what was being worked on, just that my intuition was getting better and things kept happening. I need to stay open to listen though. I’m resuming my normal stack (with RMV instead of ASBR) with Regen on the side to hopefully bring myself back to the answer and progression I was on the path to reach at the start. Embodiment is easier than fighting. But, in order to embody something, I at least need to understand it on an intuitive level and be able to become it. I know once I start that, I can make full use of Divine Dominion with it too, and I’ve already started. It’s guiding the path that the subliminal is choosing right now. If I can begin to follow this hidden language, I know my entire conscious worldview will change. There’s a structure to everything, I just need to begin to move without sight.

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#230

There’s a deeper confidence and dominance from Stark Black that I never tapped into. Leaving this reminder to myself to explore that city. It feels like falling into acceptance, like the rest of the features and feelings respond to it and snap into effect the moment I let it take over me.

Beliefs are just a complicated way of saying models of the world. They’re there to predict, so the better they are at predicting, the deeper in the mind they go. If you noticed a trend in the market, would you not see if it went deeper and could describe events on a macro scale? From there, if they’re that good, even micromodels can be made out of them, those sub-beliefs underneath. For the vast majority of limiting beliefs, they existed because they at least on some level contributed to what we believed was an accurate model of the world. So while it may be necessary to outright get rid of some, others just need a slight tweak to become both more correct and serve us immensely. Additionally, if I just come up with a model that’s immensely accurate right now, I could probably get it to encode as deeply as some of those earlier childhood memories. You can back propagate and apply your new belief system to old things that happened in the past too.

It’s like I’m existing on multiple levels of my mind. Obviously I exist on the level of my everyday life and my immediate actions, but I’m also on the level of these beliefs to where I bump into them when I quiet my thoughts and listen to what’s there. I’m also navigating through the blind maze, but my intuition of it has gotten stronger. I just move towards the actions and feelings that feel good, empowering, and in the direction of my goals (sometimes in a nonlinear order). Everything is feeling and there’s no logic to be applied, I just have to be that good at things.

I think recon exists in a different part of the mind closer to the surface, at least right now. Something that might’ve caused me to beat myself up was just… fine now. You beating yourself up over something comes a specific worldview with its own set of assumptions. When you’re the victim or “in the wrong” according to those assumptions, it’s hard to notice just how illogical or out of nowhere they are. I was already ignoring the thoughts that tried to perpetuate it, but then that realization came and absolutely destroyed what little ground they had left. I’m sure (almost for a fact) that recon can get deeper as the changes and worldview reconciliation gets deeper, but it’s just interesting that just by existing a few levels deeper, it seems nonexistent to the point that it’s almost impossible to locate. Changes just flow in over time since on a deeper level, I’m already operating from the newly reconciled worldview.

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#231

What if the only recon was me worrying about not feeling recon this whole time? I can literally see when something’s processing, I know when it’s working. It just reflects an insecurity related to the thing I want in the moment.

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#232

Just knew I’d get one of the earliest timeslots for registration. It’s a lottery so of course my good luck would apply. Exact thing happened. Some people just get it. Luck and favorability are like that.

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#233

“New money” and “old money” vibes are honestly such a universal thing, it just gets called out and recognized in wealth because that’s what people live their lives focused on. What about the difference between a savant with perfect pitch and someone who practices for thousands of hours? What about someone with natural genius and one who studies 12 hours a day? One’s genetics vs one’s effort. It’s about the side of the system you were born on. What you inherit vs what you create for yourself.

Whether something’s natural or fought for, is there really a difference? You can fight for something and establish it so hard that it’s natural, what then? These are just indicators we made to make sense of things, but they’re inaccurate. One can both be naturally smart or naturally stupid, nature is nature. Everything is perspective. If it doesn’t exist, create it, then it’s natural because you naturally evolved to create it.

So for new money and old money, I think I understand the vibe they go for with Nouveau RICH. Old money is just the aura of “this is natural for me,” not trying to justify yourself by playing status games. You trust in the systems that got you to where you are, because clearly they had to have worked if you’re this far ahead. New money is action and innovation. To take a huge middle finger to things that existed before and dare to redefine them completely. To dismantle the very things keeping other people on top. But it’s not as if everything’s dismantled, you can very well redefine a new paradigm while still remaining natural in another.

Innovate in your own way, and make that your “old money” structure. Make it natural to you, live it, breathe it, and rely on it so strongly as if it were part of you. Gain the air as if it was completely natural to you. Now you have old money air with your new money method. Success carries over to different parts of your life too, so now you can start in a new area already an “heir” of its wealth. Just don’t forget the drive and effort it took. Make it naturalized, be that self that it’s just easy for. That’s how you become an old money Nouveau, at least from my perspective. The difference between the two are nonexistent, it’s just a human label we put on it. There is no new money, there is no old money, there just is.

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#234

Procrastination gets weaponized. Not being able to do something is a definition of weak. What would that make not being able to do something now as? Weak now. Whether it’s disguised through a layer of not wanting to, the fact is that because you don’t want to, you’re not able to do it. That’s why it’s weaponized. It’s powerlessness disguised as self-satisfaction and instant gratification.

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#235

You’ve got some good experience with RAIKOV now. I cant stop thinking of a dual core NE with RAIKOV and minds eye.

How do you think that would synergies. Maybe the minds eye essence is enough to keep density down.

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#236

I honestly think it’d be one of the best stacks for self mastery. You learn from others quickly and naturally integrate it into yourself. Yet not only do you visualize those things you learned, you explore yourself, the things that you want, and how you approach the world in general. Visualization is a great manifestation technique of course, but I feel like being able to make sense of the world inside your own head is also a really good use/side effect of it as well. When I ran Mind’s Eye for a little bit it didn’t feel too dense, but for me at least, I like the visualization and all of its objectives to be tied to something. Visualization and memory for their own sake don’t appeal too much to me, I want them contributing to something.

What would your goals be for the NE?

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#237

Ive got my major NE dual core with C&C + RICH Trader that generally describes my overall goals with subs. LB is to work through what I think has been a bottleneck aswell as general improvement to quality of life.

NE Major with RAIKOV would be to help with the trading aswell as making me a learning beast. Then I thought adding minds eye would be a massive boost to this.

Another side goal of adding RAIKOV would be general boost to all skill learning. Language, oration, sports, creative skills etc. The inner awareness you keep mentioning is also very attractive.

I want to do at least a while with the stack I have now before potentially adding this for density reasons but I am getting giddy at the idea of it.

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#238

I think it’d help a lot with that. You’d learn from the market and be able to “see” a lot of things as you’re learning them. I’ve also become a lot more flexible and fluid as a person since the NE so I’m sure you’d see positive effects in other areas too.

I’m not sure if it’s just a me thing or because I went experimental (both with Terminus and my use of the title), but it also feels like a mental secretary in a way. Like I’ll see something I need, immediately ask my intuition about it, and it’ll guide me on how to get/embody it. Then with visualizing changes, models, or basically anything I’m learning. If you’re super busy or jump between a lot of different disciplines or focuses, the sub would probably adapt with you and help you manage it. The one thing I’ve been thinking of is that some of Beyond Limitless would be really nice with it. That “solutions arrive sideways” kind of thing and the mental theatre/cinema.

Regardless, the NE sounds perfect for learning and an approach I really like. I’m not the biggest fan of “expand your cognition” when I already know it’s expanded enough to learn what I want. So I think that titles that focus on the application of your cognition work really well. All that to say that if you think you can make the additional visualization boost work for you, it should end up working really well. I’d recommend it.

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#239

Amazing I will plan on doing this.

First I will focus on what I have now and add this in later as my third sub.

That will basically be my stack for the year. (As long as I am not too tempted by new KB) lol

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#240

New KB is a stack killer. When it comes out I’ll probably take a detour on WDB for a few months.

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