Not by force but through power. This sums up my current impression of Eqv.
My first cycle with Eqv has come to an end and I usually would resume with a short five-day washout but I got some intuitive nudges that I should take a longer washout right now, so that’s what I’m going to do, 21 days is scheduled. The last washout that was even four weeks long took place in March this year. So It’s time to have another one.
I did one cycle of EmpD and then one cycle of Eqv (EmpD+KB3) until now. Here are some impressions:
- strong masculine voice is covered with EmpD, I do not miss Emperor’s voice or Voice is the Law in my custom
- while BDLM will give more results, EmpD does a good enough job down there, erections are full and strong
- resilience is off the charts: I’m right now facing some of the toughest decisions in my entire life and while I was an emotional wreck a couple of weeks ago, I really can keep my emotions in check, they do not control me and my behaviour at this moment
- speaking about control: I am much more able to keep my boundaries up and do not let me get derailed by emotional attacks from others
- I finally can see more clearly now who I truly am and what I truly want; I am more able to discern what ideas I was following that were not mine
- a very interesting observation for me: last year around this time I was doing two cycles with KB3 as a major with my VdM(v2) custom and the energy of KB3 was very much concentrating in my lower dantian area and not spreading very much; now the energy does not feel that strong but is really covering my whole being, it does not get stuck but can flow very freely; this might be because I did continue with KB with a second round since then, maybe because I use KB3 with MDFY:Freedom right now or maybe the Synergy: Energetic Transcendence does also help with that; in the end, the reason does not matter that much to me, the result is what is important → I feel that I can use the energy much better than last year.
That’s it for now. Maybe if I come up with some more insights, I’ll post them here. During my Eqv run I also felt a strong pull towards DR:LD because it might help me with my current situation. That would mean that I have to postpone my VdM custom but I think that I should resolve my current situation first.
I’m looking very much forward to what will come during my washout and my coming cycle with Eqv.
Two thoughts that came to my mind since yesterday:
- My skin has become smoother, I have some scars in my face and they appear not as prominent anymore. Also my face has some kind of radiance, like a glow from inside. Don’t think that this is only EmpD but also Synergy: Preordained vitality.
- In an older post I wrote about KB (mainly stage 3, Main Disc. Thread - Khan Black: The Crucible (Custom Core Now Available!) - #2401 by x3m): “can be used to boost your efforts in achieving your goals or strengthening your energetic aspects, depending on your personal preferences and aspirations → 4/5: it really helped me to work on my creative goals as musician. All the extra energy that I had could be directed into my musical ventures.”
Now that I think about it, it seems to contradict what I was writing yesterday in my last bulletpoint. But this is not the case. Looking back, I was able to direct the energy from KB3 to my musical aspirations but it took me some serious effort and willpower to move the energy from my lower dantian to my creative work. Right now it feels like the energy is flowing much more freely and without resistance - it’s effortless as I would describe it now.
Note to myself:
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After one and a half week of washout I already feel as if my mental space has cleared. I can feel some kind of “default mode” that I’m in that is saying: processing of the big chunks is done.
The last time I listened to my VdM(v3) custom was on October 23rd. After that I’ve done my cycle with Eqv exclusively and now my washout. Yet, the VdM custom really bloomed yesterday (five weeks later!), my singing all of a sudden took such a big leap forward, I really was surprised by my own emotional connection to the songs I sang!
My washout ends on Sunday. Monday will be the beginning of my new “season”. I feel good, my mind is clear and my emotions are calm. These three weeks of washout were absolutely necessary. Apart from the VdM scripting I didn’t experience much bloom.
I’m going to stick to my initial plan: next cycle will be VdM (RM:V 1+2) exclusively. When the new Genesis:TAoHaJ is available, I’ll consider if I’m going to add it as a second sub for this round.
In order to evaluate the RM:V custom, I’m going to do two things:
-
Checking the rhythmic part with Michael Hedges’ Aerial Boundaries. I haven’t played this piece for a couple of years and I’v been struggeling to get it right ever since. It is quite difficult to really nail it and I never managed to do this. What I’m going to do is to just watch the video with the live version and Andy McKee’s take on it daily for three weeks and then try to play it (with tabs). Let’s see how much of it I can take in just from hearing and watching it (my custom has the RAIKOV module in it too).
Michael Hedges’ live version
Andy McKee’s interpretation -
Practice the singing with a song that I do already have a good feel for and see if I can take it even further. I think it is a very suitable song because it carries a lot of emotion.
Corey Taylor - Snuff Acoustic
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My life circumstances have changed dramatically since starting this thread. My EqV custom gave me the strength to go through this profound transformation. I didn’t expect that only one cycle of EqV made such a huge difference. My goals have not changed though so I need to adjust my tools that fit my current situation better. It will still be EqV with EmpD and VdM with RM:V 1+2 but carefully replanned to help me further. More to come.
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I finished the first cycle of VdM solo and then started a second one last week. During the first cycle I was a little sick and didn’t sing much. But my guitar playing really got better with the rhythm parts of Aerial Boundaries. The visualisation from RM:V 1 is mind blowing - I just watched the YouTube videos and was able to absorb the piece to an extend that I could easily replicate a lot of it when I picked up the guitar myself. I already knew that visualisation plays a huge part in any high level sports and music but experiencing it firsthand is something else.
I updated both, my EqV and my VdM custom to my current needs. VdM hasn’t changed much, only one module that I exchanged, EqV was modified more because of reasons. I do regret that I could not fit MDFY: Freedom in there again, essentially I made one custom out of two, so I really had to do some sacrifices.
Esse quam videri
#1 Emperor Daddy Core
#2 Heartsong Core
#3 New Romance Experience Core
#4 Alexander’s Play
#5 Love Without Attachment
#6 Limiting People Remover
#7 You Are Not Alone
#8 Code of Loyalty
#9 Safety Net
#10 Living Truth
#11 Inner Gasoline
#12 Prevent Premature Ejaculation
#13 Male Enhancement
#14 Pride Unbroken
#15 Solitude
#16 Synergy: Perfection Manifestation (Sexual Manifestation, Gorgeous Manifestor)
#17 Synergy: Beyond Seduction (Instant Spark, Focused Arousal, Long Range Seduction)
#18 Synergy: Preordained Vitality (Asclepius, Serum X, Fusion Optimized, Health Codex, Radiating Health)
#19 Synergy: Energetic Transcendence (The Architect, Energetic Development XI, Metamorphosis, Energetic Restoration, Energetic Augmentation)
#20 Synergy: Harmonic Conflux (Stress Displacement, Harmonic Singularity)
Virtuoso di Musica
#1 RM:V St1 Core
#2 RM:V St2 Core
#3 New Skills Experience Core
#4 RAIKOV
#5 Cosmic Navigator
#6 Dance Mastery
#7 Elegance
#8 Subconscious Flow
#9 Master’s Coordination
#10 Unlimiter
#11 Joie de Vivre
#12 Natural Winner
#13 Inner Voice
#14 King’s Radiance
#15 Approachability Aura
#16 Synergy: Voice is the Law (Emperors Voice, Voice Master)
#17 Synergy: Tale of the Dragon (Dragon Tongue, Song of Joy, True Sell, Story Teller)
#18 Synergy: Semper Praesens (Ego Adsum, Everpresent)
#19 Synergy: Wonders of Life (Spiritual Freedom, The Wonder)
#20 Synergy: Glory Incarnate (Gloryseeker, The Spotlight, Lifeblood Fable)
With my older version I did one cycle of EqV and three cycles of VdM individually, now I’m combining them right away and will run a stack of these two customs for as long as I feel I want to change some thing.
Since it covers several subs, I’m going to write about my rearranged stack here in my journal. This can be seen as the entry post:
Ok, since Feb 1 I’m on my fourth cycle of Eqv and VdM, makes it in total: 5x Eqv and 7x VdM since October.
I realised that I have no problem keeping my VdM constant. I’m practically using the same music custom for two years now, the only major change was from UA+MEye to RM:V1+2 when the latter were released.
On the other hand, I do have some tendencies to want to change my Eqv. A great part of it might well be recon. Still, I did rebuild the Eqv custom about four or five times since last October, although I only used two versions of it. Screams like recon.
Anyway, I’m now going to remove the “archetypes” from my Eqv custom and only put in general cores and modules that serve my longterm and probably lifetime goals. They are easy to name and I did write them in my very first post in this journal: stay as healthy as possible, have good connections to others, understand myself better. Just like my VdM custom is for becoming a better musician. I’ll write out more specific goals of course but I’m not sure if I will post them online.
I can do this now because I let go of my own self limitation of only wanting to use two subs at once. Now I’m going to use my two customs as a base and then add a major title as a flexible third option. I think the possibility of name-embedded majors with one module played a big role in this decision.
My new Eqv is going to look like this (it’s still a draft though, I’ll have to finish my current cycle first and then do a proper washout):
New Eqv
#1 Genesis: Art of Happiness and Joy Core
#2 Alchemist: Singularity Core
#3 Dopaminergic Revival
#4 Joy of Wealth
#5 Aura of Wealth
#6 You Are Not Alone
#7 Code of Loyalty
#8 Safety Net
#9 Limiting People Remover
#10 Attachment Destroyer
#11 Inner Gasoline
#12 Mimisbrunnr
#13 Living Truth
#14 Art of Trust
#15 Pathways of Intuition
#16 Synergy: Beyond Connection (2)
#17 Synergy: Venus Unveiled (3)
#18 Synergy: Harmonic Conflux (2)
#19 Synergy: Preordained Vitality (5)
#20 Synergy: Energetic Transcendence (5)
I can say that I not only like this new custom, it literally looks beautiful to me.
The biggest contenders for my third sub are KB St3, RoS and now He:O. I always wanted to run RoS, but I think my stack might be a bit heavy on the spiritual side then. KB3 is great, would serve me well with my music custom and also my Eqv. But as I have written in the He:O thread, I somehow hear some calling from this program. Finally Hearstong could also serve me well. We will see.
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Recently I started dreaming about snakes. I think this is a part of heartsong that is finally kicking in after three and a half months. I just started my washout of two weeks to prepare for my new EqV but now I‘m wondering if I should continue with Heartsong… I‘ll let the mind do its thing during the washout and then decide later.
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Huh, I had a dream about kidnappers and snake-like creatures yesterday when I was using LBFH.
That’s a strange coincidence.
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Maybe more like selective awareness than a coincidende but the concepts of love might evoke subconcious connections that are dealt with such occurrences in dreams. I‘m not sure what meaning my dream did carry.
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Removed Aura of Wealth from my planned EqV and added Formless Clarity instead. The description of Aura of Wealth seemed a bit vague to me, or at least, it didn’t speak that much too me anymore than when I read it the first time. Joy of Wealth on the other hand stills sound like a truly great fit for my goals.
Stephen R. Covey was your mentor? Holy dope! I envy you, mate!
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I met him through the HBS alumni program in 1992 when I spend one year abroad in the U.S. for my own Ph.D. studies. From the very beginning I admired his work but I think this was before he got acknowledged by a wide audience outside the U.S. through his books. He had a gift to really make you feel appreciated for what you are trying to achieve. And in my eyes he really was an example for living what he was teaching. Just by observing how he was behaving you could learn many invaluable lessons.
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That’s wonderful, I’m so happy for you. I’m also a huge fan of his work, I never met him, but what I read about him makes it clear that he really embodied what he taught. “The Seven Habits of highly Effective People” was the first book that opened my eyes really for self-development. Before, I was stuck in the mindset of “you have what you got, and you are who you are”. Through this book, I learned that it is possible to be the master and captain of your own feelings, behaviors and fate. It was so crucial for my own development.
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