After a lot of consideration, conversations with the venerable @AMASH and a case of premature journalling, I have come to the conclusion to keep a journal here, even if for no other reason than to have a before and after snapshot.
Let me start with a little disclaimer:
I am running EoG AND Khan together, back to back, around 20+ hours a day. I feel I know myself well enough and I can take it under my current conditions. But you will notice there are some side-effects that make my experience harder than it should be.
This is a tricky combination, running both multi-stage programs, and generally recommended against. I’m doing partly to test my limits, and in part to fill up the remainder of the year and start a new program in January (Alchemist?)
For now, I will continue to run stages 1 for the rest of the month. As for how I will divide the rest of the stages of both programs out over the remaining 5 months is still open for debate. My best idea so far is continuing stages 1 through August, stages 2 in September, 3 in October, and 4 in November and December. I appreciate any suggestions.
For those familiar with my prose, you’ll know this will be a bit of an interactive journal. I make fun of things, including myself, and will share off-topic comments and questions that are in my head.
Finally, you should know that this won’t be the lost journal of Don Juan. Right now, my focus is on myself and my career. As much as I miss the company of women, they simply aren’t a priority yet. Should I trip over any though, all bets are off.
Although Khan has definite sexual elements, I expect the combination of Khan’s social and wealth aspects and EoG will mostly overshadow these. We’ll see.
End of disclaimer.
My goals, as I stated are to get my life back on track. I used to work a lot of projects. It’s what I’m good at, I’m a strategist, an architect, so I can build entire IT infrastructures in my head.
But at the end of last year, after some unpleasant experiences at assignments due to my radical honesty and sometimes confrontational form of communication, I came to the realization I was sick and tired of commuting all over the country from assignment to assignment, never getting to know anybody. So I gave my notice and have been between jobs since early this year, figuring out where to go next.
That explains why I’m so ridiculously active on this forum at all hours. And why I get enough rest to run both these programs together.
My first goal is to find a new source of income, and I hope that on the way there, I will figure out more about myself, what I’m supposed to do and where I’m going. I will take as many social opportunities as I can find on the way and will meet everybody, women or otherwise, with a smile. Que sera, sera.
The story so far.
I bought both programs on the 7th and started listening from that moment forward. I listen to ultrasonics on headphones whenever I’m behind the computer, masked when I’m on the road and asleep.
After the first few days, as you can read from the accidental journal I linked to at the start of this post, I started feeling a very strong need to change pretty much everything about my life. If I didn’t, I got hit with a mild sensation of depression as a result of disappointing myself. That sensation has since balanced out a bit, fortunately. I still feel the need, but not so much disappointment as before.
One thing that always happens to me when I start subs is that my sleep rhythm goes strange (usually I sleep deeper and longer) and my sex drive all but goes away. The latter being a challenge, since I have the libido of a teenager. I’ve always concluded that somehow the sexual energy is being used for something else and the sleep is used to work on stuff.
This time, it’s somewhat different. I actually sleep less, waking up after several hours. For the past few days, I’ve just stayed in bed and told myself to sleep for a few more hours, usually coming up around 9 hours.
As for the sex drive, @dorfmeister linked to a post about male multiple orgasms (I’d call it MMO, but that would attract gamers who have no time for sex, alone or otherwise). I was familiar with Mantak Chia’s work on the topic. Essentially it talks about how to reach the edge of orgasm and then draw the energy away into the spinal column, keeping the energy inside rather than spending it.
Why in the world would I mention this to a bunch of guys? Well, I was very surprised to learn that since starting these subs I have a new ability. I can control my erection by intent alone and it takes about two seconds to draw the energy away. I have NEVER been that much in control, and now somehow I am. If this stays, I look forward to experiment with a lucky lady in the future.
Okay, enough of that uncomfortable topic. Moving on.
After relentless coaching by someone I would like to consider a friend, I went against my instincts yesterday and volunteered at a charity BBQ for 1000 of the less fortunate people in the region. There were no girls to be seen, but I ended up being uncharacteristically social, almost getting two firemen to start line-dancing, and making more than one old ladies’ day.
The best part for me was not so much how comfortable I felt being among all those people and just helping out, doing something good for the community, but that I ended up with the organizer of the charity to discuss more volunteer work. This man has a professional network that reaches into the government, 700 volunteers and he likes me. I see possible income-generating possibilities in my future. If nothing else, I can fill the gap in my resume with volunteer work.
As a matter of fact, I will be meeting with him tomorrow to talk about how I can make myself useful. And he’s invited me to come fishing with him and a bunch of guys next Wednesday, even though I told him I didn’t know the first thing about fishing.
So I’d consider that improvement.
When it comes to my dreams, I have little to report. I rarely remember them, and when I do they tend to be ideas for fiction books I wish to one day write.
That’s about it for now, methinks. Thanks for reading!
And now for something completely different:
Funniest thing I learned on this trip so far: the word buffalo.
