Youre gonna love it man! Hands down the most complete stack
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I honestly have a hard time really picking much i can put here. Stark seems almost entirely integrated in my personality and comes extremely naturally. Chosen helps humble me a bit while somehow still increasing my confidence. Heartsong had some cool manifestations.
For the most part all this is so naturally and integrated though, that its hard to pick something to really journal as a “result”. Thats the magic of ZP, with Qv2 it felt more like it was helping me build those traits that the sub builts, meanwhile with ZP you start at the endgoal, already having those skills and traits.
This is probably also why it seems so hard to stick to ZP for a long time. All the things you want from a sub get integrated so fast, and it immediatly all feels so natural, that you already feel like youve achieved your goal and want to move on.
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Finally someone said it 
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I hate those long ass commutes.
I noticed a really strange reaction out of myself. So adter my first loop of heartsong i met my workgroup for this semester. It was online though so i didnt see their face, but in a very weird way one of them just seemed to fit me perfectly and be so extremely similair to me, to a very strange degree. Afterwards i kinda alreadyd decided id def ask her out at some point, just to see what more strange stuff HS has in store.
Today while with this same workgroup, we decided to turn on our webcam. She was really freaking hot. In a weird way i got kinda dissappointed though, with how hot she was. I kinda felt like with how hot she was it put a lot of pressure on me and i wasnt as eager to go after her anymore. Really weird how i secretly wish a girl i was already flirting with was less hot.
Aside from this i also started getting an exercise buddy. I really feel like i dont work out enough. I climb once every three days, wich is definitely very taxing on my muscles. But there are still a lot of other muscles that i barely train with climbing that i need to work on as well. I want to do just an at home training mostly for abs and chest right now. Not really any idea just yet how i wanna do this just yet, perhaps with one of those abs/chest HIIT apps? They aint perfect but i like having some sort of schedule to go off lol. If anyone has another idea though, def let me know. I have way to little knowledge about this kind of stuff.
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Just had possibly the most scuffed workout ever lol. I had at home an extremely small…. (Dumbbell you use for a bench press). I didnt really have a bench to work out though so i placed me back on a stool and my lower body on a bed, and than started benchpressing like that. It seemed to work though as i definitely feel my muscles afterwards. My workout was far from optimal as i have no idea what im doing, but hey, im a complete beginner, better a scuffed workout than no workout at all. Once i get this down i can start using the workout center in my bouldergym.
Aside from that feeling a bit of overexposure. Monday will be my last loops before a washout. Its hard to try and stick with my stack, theres so much else i also wanna run, like a dedicated seduction stack, or a proper fitness stack. But im committing myself to this stack for at least 3 full cycles. This stack helps with litterly everything i can think off at least to some degree, its a perfect foundation that fits me so incredibly much. And if i really need some extra focus in some direction, i can always use that third spot for a sub that can help with that.
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Starks charisma and social fluency is kinda insane sometimes. In my country we have this thing where you have a meeting with a house with 14 or so students, and you basically get interviewed to see if they want you as a roommate. Its extremely hard due to the fact theres such a shortage of available houses, so you often have 30+ people going for the same single spot. A few days ago was my very first time doing that, i had absolutely no idea what i was getting into. Stark carried me so much through it though, that i almost got the house first try. I barely missed out though sadly, wich i was kinda prepared for tbh so i didnt care to much.
The girl heartsong manifested also seems to be a weirdly perfect match. Already got a date with her and just actively flirting and all that. Im realy freaking bad at this though lmfao, but so far its going really good.
Im currently on day whatever of the washout. Definitely been feeling a bit of recon, but throughout the recon the effects of stark and chosen have always shined through. Theyre just part of who i am, i dont see them goinngaway anytime soon. The manifestation subs have been impressing me the most right now though. It seems almost surreal how quickly and aggressively these manifestation subs manifest… i really cant wait for ascension chamber lol.
Overall though my satisfaction with subs is sooo freaking high. It really feels like cheat codes to live life on easy mode. If i really get desperate for finding a fun house? I can just run a loop of inner circle, and wjthin a week ill probably find the perfrct house and roommates. If i wanna get more chicks? A seduction stack is really easy to make, and theyll just come to me without me having to do much. Hell, even later in life when i wanna focus on money. A bit of stark and RICH will most likely get me there very very quickly.
Life with and without ZP seems kind of a night and day difference. I freaking love that i found subclub.
For now though, im just kind of satisfied with how everything is right now. I know there are a few specific relationship issues i need to get throigh. And knowing how ZP works, the fact that i realise this probably means that ive almost gotten over them already.
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Honestly, at this point im not really sure what chosen really brings to the table. It was an amazing sub when i first ran it, and the effects have never really gone away. It feels like its pretty much completely integrated as much as it can be at the moment. Its an amazing sub but for now i dont feel like im gaining much by having it in my stack.
The sub that might actually work on some of my current weakpoints would be spartan. I often have a lot of good plans to do stuff like, work on something study related in the morning, meditate before sleeping, workout in the morning etc etc. But all these things more often than not only last a day or two before im already giving up and moving on to the next thing. I really want to have a sub that helps with that dedication. Im hoping spartan can help with this.
For now i have a lot of work to do as i will soon have some exams. Im lowkey expecting that the inly reason i still have a chance to pass is stark lmfao. Dont get me wrong im still very much behind and a lot to do in quite a short amount of time. But ive actually done something. While normally if there isnt a deadline i do absolutely mothing lmfao.
Another great help that both stark and chosen, as well as modules like sanguine, joie de vivre and carpe diem ascended ahs brought is, for the first time in my life it doesnt feel like my mood is something thats detrimental to me. In the past it always felt like while i was fighting to achieve things, i was at the same time fighting myself and my mood if that makes sense. At this point though, ive become quite happy and easygoing on myself, so that has far the most part just disappeared. Giving me a lot more joy in actually doing things, rather than having to force myself.
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I didn’t see your stack above, was this heartstrong ZP? Or how long did you run heartstrongfor?
This is from a bit back. My main stack only consists of two subs so i often change the third sub around. I think baout 2 weeks or so ago i did 3 loops of HS over the course of a week or so. It was heartsong ZP, that shit is really powerfull.
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what are the main two subs?
And did the relationship blossom continue even after no longer running heartstrong?
My main two subs at the time were stark and chosen. Right now its stark and spartan though. Were still in a very early dating stage. We see each other about once or twice every week (often for school too so its not like we went on that many dates just yet). Its still going good, even without me running heartsong, i cant see that much about it though since its still really early, barely started dating.
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I only truly realised this when i ran AscC, so it could be that its due to that sub, or that it has been like this for a bit and i just didnt notice it before. But there really isnt much right now that i really want that much. Sure id like a nice studenthouse, chick(s), good grades, and whatever else. But these things are going fine by themselve, i feel somewhat detached to the outcome. Im perfectly satisfied with how everything is right now and i dont care to much if these things happen sooner, or later. I just have this inner sense of knowing that everything will work out regardless so im just kinda going with the flow. (Not saying im just waiting for things to happen, ofcourse im taking action, but im not really needy for quick results if that makes sense).
The biggest problem i can think of right now that i have is that i cant stick to a consistent exercise schedule lol. If that is my biggest problem, than you know things are going pretty well. A farcry from when i started subs a year back.
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Ive been working really hard for my studies these past few days. Im quite proud of my self how many productive hours ive been having. I definitely have a lot of faith in the test tomorrow, and after that ill have to catch up for my other subject. Ive actually been feeling zero stress for these tests, despite still being able to get myself to do quite a lot. I want to thank spartans mental toughness and discipline for this, i may be praising it a bit to soon, but so far it really feels like it has done, exactly what i was hoping it would do.
its kinda weird to say but i think i know something that would greatly help with my wellbeing, and my procrastination problem. I need to plan my days a bit more (without overdoing it as much as i am now), and also schedule more time for rest and enjoying myself. Right now i really dont have a moment where i feel i actually can be lazy. Dont get me wrong, i do take time to play some games, watch some tv, youtube, app a bit etc etc. But i do these things while still having in the back of my head that i should be doing ‘‘more productive’’ things. This means that even when resting, it still doesnt really feel like i can rest.
The fact that i have so little of these scheduled in rest breaks could possibly be a big reason why i spend such a long time procrastinating. I need my breaks and enjoy myself a bit from time to time. Also, at this point i should realise that im gonna spend time on unproductive things regardless, so beating myself up over it and not being able to get all the enjoyment out of these moments, thats the thing that truly makes it timewasters. (in my custom i ran previously, i had machine:action and not machine:rest, so that may have something to do with this).
As for sub results. Ive been hinting at it above, but ive been spending sooo much time on productive shit. I really have been doing a lot lately, its kinda tiring me out. also getting the urge to workout a lot of times. I have yet to really create a real workoutschedule, but its a good start.
Also been feeling a bit of recon/overwhelm. This isnt all from the sub, but ive been feeling a bit overwhelmed, and really eyeing a bunch of different subs i wanna put in my stack, wich usually is a sign for me that im in recon lmfao. Im most likely gonna do shrooms again soon, so that might help a bit with this type of stuff and allow me to be able to relax a bit. I need to plan that shit well though, as there still is a lot to be done and a lot of plans for this week.
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Man i really cant stick to a consistent schedule. I never had this problem on Qv2 but on ZP it seems so much easier to get tempted. In the spur of the moment i decided to buy ascension. Tomorrow im gonna fully decide what my stack is gonna look like, and im gonna stick to it fully. No open spot, just one clear stack that im gonna stick to no matter what for at least 1/2 cycles.
Okay, this is the stack ive ended up on for now:
Expansive: stark, this one just fits my personality, alligns with a lot of my goals and both encompasses how i already am, and how i want to be. Its perfect for me in a lot of ways. The downsides though are that it can make me a bit needy and overly social.
Restrictive: ascension, self esteem and self consciousness have been real issues for me. Working on my inner power will benefit me a great deal. I also expect that this can offset some of the downsides i mentioned with stark like feeling a bit needy and overly social when its not appropriate. Another issue i often have is being really chaotic and wanting to di everything at the last moment. I also expect ascension to help in this regard. I really think this sub can do a lot for me and along with stark really become an all encompassing stack that does basically everything i want.
Balancer: im really havinng a hard time decidung this. Its still quite vague to me what exactly a balancer is supposed to do. The three main contenders ive ended up on though are:
- love bomb, offset some of the negative responses i could get from such a gigantic rise in status while at the same time adding to the charisma, confidence and just helping me feel great in general.
- primal seduction, some idgaf attitude, more confidence, while also helping me pull back a bit as far as seduction is concerned. Will also greatly help a lot of problems i have in regards to seduction.
- WANTED, same as primal seduction but with physical shifting and less of the healing aspects.
Im gonna do a bit more research on what a balancer is supposed to do before fully making my final descision, and than ill be making a new journal and sticking to one stack for at least 2 cycles.
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Ive chosen for love bomb as the balancer. That one seems to make the most sense for the reasons i mentioned above. I also got a sneaking suspicion that by raising all my confidence, charisma and status through the roof, than all the other stuff is quickly gonna dissappear on its own.
This also keeps my stack somewhat focussed and builds a perfect foundation for anything i may want to run in the future. I think this may be the most wellrounded stack ive created so far, both relatively small in density to make the results come quickly and ferociously, while also having subs that help me in basically all areas of life.
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Goddamn recon is hitting hard on my washout rn. Ascension made me realise just how much of an asshole i can be. We always like to think of ourselves as the good guys of our story, but honestly, even if were not all outright doing bad things. Im really starting to think about how selfish everyone really is, including myself.
This isnt neccessairly a bad thing though. At the end of the day we all have to take care of number one. I guess this may be the start of me starting to take responsibility for my own life.
I have a sneaking suspicion that ascension is gonna beat the crap out of me, possibly worse than DR did. I also feel like it will be the most beneficial sub i can run though. I kinda need it to beat me up so i can become better for it.
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