Helllooo everyone, been a few months I haven’t journaled in a bit. Recently I’ve stopped completely Prozac and Wellbutrin, reduced by a lot my caffeine consumption, started taking some big T booster, I did a small cycle of three weeks of Tamoxifen to boost my LH which was low…
Basically, this is my custom :
Custom
- Stark Core
- Primal Seduction Core
Positivity Matrix :
- Negativity Displacer
- Divine Self Image
- Inner Voice
- Merger of World
Manifestation Matrix :
- Divine Will
- Dominion
- Yggdrasil
- Gorgeous Manifestor
Attration Matrix :
- Temptation
- Earthshaker - Sexuality
- Ethereal Presence
- Entranced
- Approachability Aura
- Alexander’s Play
Success Matrix :
- Joie de vivre
- Natural Winner
- Furious Ascent
- Iron Frame
My goals with this stack is to :
- Re-gain sexual confidence in myself. Than I am an attractive man.
- Build a positive mindset and trust myself that I deserve good shit in life
As you might see, these thoughts were beliefs that have been created during my depression. And now, even if my mind is fine, I still need to get rid of those shitty fear to live my life. I spoke to my father few days ago about wanting more and he told me that everyone in the family is not taking lot of risk, and usually have linear carrer haha, and I kinda realised that year, looking at my uncles and aunts, cousins, I can see everyone not going too far out of their comfort zone xD
Edit : 23-06-2022, 12 days after starting my stack. I have a feeling my custom works on too much “outer” elements. While adding a loop of wanted to my stack (custom+LD+Wanted), I’ve noticed a better acceptance of myself. I am now wondering if my custom is really the sub for me. I will keep researching on the forum and trying subs to find the right one.
Edit : 26-06-2022, I ran 1 loop of Khan st4 yesterday with limit destroyer. I feel like Khan st4 might help me attain all my goals because of it’s profound alpha scripting. I also tryed to have sex last friday and I couldn’t get it up for the… I don’t know anymore seems like I am conditionned that sex - > Fear. Khan helped me with sex back in the day because of the cutting of external validation. I will also start to meditate.
Edit : 04-07-2022, after a week of Khan, I see it’s making me grow in the right direction. I will keep going with Khan (adding LD or Rebirth loop depending on the day). Growth is a process, ZP is working in subconscious, slowly working on my limiting beliefs and working on them. I will also add rich to my stack to help work some of those money goals, hopefully land a good high paying job!