Think I want to keep Nomad finally instead of Inner Gasoline. And I also want to make space for Polyglot, I want to learn more languages.
I guess I will concede Nomad for Polyglot, as being a nomad doesn’t look to be in my near-term future. Let me focus on succeeding in my current role (it’s only been a week after all), and I’ll look into Nomad again once I’m ready to prepare to leave.
Polyglot is what will help me immensely to prepare for the nomad life, so I think I’ll bring it in instead.
Perhaps a part of me felt like the job was complete. After 2 years of hard and dedicated work, I finally was able to start an actual career with a salary and a legit job.
It’s the nature of man to never be content with what they have, what a shame. Reality is that this is only the beginning of week 2, and already I want more. I’m not satisfied with the amount I’m making and I haven’t even received my first paycheck yet 
I want more. Finishing school and landing this job wasn’t the end, it was the beginning. I need to embrace the grind, because it never left; only the environment changed.
This is only year 2 of my 1st 3 year plan, I haven’t even entered phase 2 yet and that’s where shit really picks up.
Shit, now that I think about it I’m still 3 months away from even beginning year 2. Just have to bite down and fucking work, not just for the job but for my life - my hobbies that I love, the physique I want, the mental acumen I need (which won’t happen without my diet being in check - it is truly my greatest weakness I must say). My spiritual journey must be strong and steadfast.
The name of this journal is a constant reminder, it follows me.
Decided to wash out WANTED and RoS.
Think I’m going to to restart on Monday with just Kaizen and Daredevil, and take it from there. Maybe bring back an old Muay Thai custom too while I’m at it…
Less than 2 weeks of WANTED and I’ve spent about 800$ on clothes and perfume, after having bought nothing in those categories all year.
Smfh. Fuck that sub.
Kaizen/Daredevil/Spartan starting tomorrow. Feels good to be going back to the ERB-guided stacks that led me to the most holistic gains in my life.
I really hope that SC stops releasing new shit for me to try, but I know they’re working on RoB and that will be difficult to resist once it comes out. Hopefully that day is far, like 3 months.
I’m going to miss RoS to be honest, and to be quite honest I believe it will make a return to my stack. It’s just too good of a sub to ignore.
I’m a little disappointed that I once again bailed on my plans to run Khan, but my excuse this time is that my job requires that I be extremely social especially right now, while I’m still ingratiating myself to the company. I need to be able to cultivate relationships across departments and I don’t think any sub fits better than Daredevil or Stark for that task.
Also met a girl who peaked my interest, but don’t want to think too much about it. If it happens it happens, if it doesn’t it wasn’t supposed to. I said to myself that I have to focus at my immediate short term goals right now, so I won’t let distractions happen unless they’re meant to (because they aren’t actually distractions).
Man I keep thinking about doing Khan, and then finding justifications as to why I shouldn’t run Khan. But everything in my mind and soul is urging me towards Khan, because of my propensity to overthink social interactions at the workplace. I just have to let go more than anything else.
Why not Daredevil? It focuses on precisely this issue and doesn’t require such a huge time commitment.
I’m currently running Daredevil at the moment actually.
Just to be clear, I’m not talking about overthinking from social anxiety I’m talking more about being politically savvy while still maintaining and cultivating relationships.
The calmness I get from Khan feels perfect for that, and it’s something I have yet to experience from Daredevil.
Hm.
Kaizen V2. Take out True Sell, Direct Influencing Aura, Ebon Manuever, Gloryseeker, Nomad. Add in the stuff I cut out, like Polyglot, Spartan, Inner Gasoline, Extreme Exercise Motivation, Achilles/Achilles Heel.
Focuses the title completely to a mental and physical aspect tailored towards work.
The modules cut from that, can be added to a Daredevil custom instead. I’m more interested in that idea by the day, because it frees up a slot for me to dedicate to the Khan journey I’ve been putting off for so long.
Experiencing a lot of recon today, I believe it’s related to Mogul because of my excessive spending lately.
Spending so much money on clothes and perfume, because that’s the way I cope with being one of the poorest people at my new job. Feeling quite insecure, every fucker that works here drives or is about to drive a nice car.
Feeling bad about my past decisions in life, I’ve stunted my growth significantly and it just annoys me. I feel impatient, insecure and generally depressed about my life today. What to do…
The beauty of running subs for a good amount of time is something I forgot, considering how much I’ve been switching and experimenting these past few months.
I feel like the cores I’m currently running must become staples of my stack for the rest of the year, and I believe that organizing my stack into 2 customs with the Khan journey on the side may be the best way to approach this.
Restructure Kaizen to be QL4+Mogul+Spartan. Intellect, Productivity, Energy.
Create a 2nd custom with Daredevil, True Sell and PCC or Stark (leaning towards PCC to make my interactions on Daredevil more intelligent - then again, True Sell can probably accomplish that by itself. AsC could be a better use of a core slot, now that I think about it).
2nd custom will take the social elements of Kaizen v1 and build upon them, while incorporating new components related to manifestation.
3rd slot will be my commitment to Khan, which is something that I’ve put off for far too long.
I plan to start this 2nd custom in July, the planning should be done at that point and my slate should be free. This also gives me a solid 2 full months of running my current stack, since I need to spend more time running my stack and stop switching subs the way I’ve been all of 2023.
On 2nd thought, why should that 2nd custom be so manifestation focused? I should add feel good elements instead, and I think Love Bomb would be the perfect core to add to it (over PCC or AsC). Manifestation stuff can definitely be included as well, but the focus of that custom is my social archetype for my career.
Kaizen 2
Intellect:
Core: QL4
APS: Head
Book Blitz
Index Gate
Polyglot
Work & Productivity:
Core: Mogul
Job Seeker
Lifeblood Fable
Free Pass
Victory’s Call
Energy Development:
Core: Spartan
Negative Energy Transmutation
Inner Blaze
Inner Gasoline
The Architect
Asclepius (or Nomad, or Machine: Action; need to decide between the 3)
Boosters:
Cosmic Navigator
Carpe Diem Ascended
Deep Sleep
Eye of the Storm
Daredevil Tings:
Social:
Core: Daredevil
Core: Inner Circle
Charisma & Flirting Automatic Mentor/Improver
Emperor’s Voice
Ebon Manuever
Dragon Tongue
Sexual Manifestation
Influence:
Core: True Sell
Direct Influencing Aura
Gloryseeker
Entranced
Temptation
Feel Good:
Joie de Vivre
Gratitude Embodiment
Harmonic Singularity
Inner Voice
Boosters/Manifestation:
Void of Creation
Dominion
Subconscious Flow
Cosmic Navigator
Spartan may seem like it sticks out quite a bit within the grand scheme of Kaizen 2, but if you understand the value Spartan brings to mental strength and a healthy diet, you’d understand why I put it there. I intend it to take the role that Fusion Optimized failed to.
The 2nd custom is definitely not close to launch. I definitely like the list though, and think it’s a solid group of modules. I also like the list for Kaizen 2, though I do wish I could find a place for Metamorphosis somewhere in there.
The 2 together make for a great combo alongside Khan in my eyes.
Edit: IST for SM in DD, Machine Action for Asclepius in KZ.
So what’s the plan? I can’t continue to fly off the seat of my pants forever. It took at least 6 weeks before the deep work began with Kaizen, so I’ll need to obtain that deep work effect from Daredevil and Spartan before changing it up. This has only been the 2nd week of Daredevil and Spartan, so I can only change things up after June.
Washout: May 3 (going on Wednesdays as approx. start date of washout, can also be the day before or the day after)
Kaizen, DD, Spartan
Washout: May 24
Kaizen, DD, Spartan
Washout: June 14
June 19 should be the first day of my new stack with Kaizen 2, Daredevil Supreme and most importantly, the beginning of my journey on Khan. I’ve waited long enough, I’ve put it off for too long, it must be addressed. This is the stack until December.
Remaining washout days (3rd week Wednesday until end of weekend):
July 5
July 26
August 16
September 6
September 27
October 18
November 8
November 29
December 20
January 10
12 cycles remain until the end of the year, 10 if you exclude the ones planned with DD and Spartan.
I think 3 cycles for stage 1 and then 2 cycles for each stage after is a solid idea. Gives me 9 cycles, 8 if I just run 1 cycle of Khan 4 (since the last cycle could be run at any time because of the previous deep work of the other stages).
After 8 cycles, I can replace Khan with RICH for 1 cycle so that I can get that big-time end-of-year raise. Then I can return to Khan and gameplan for 2024.
Best course of action in my eyes. My greatest amount of growth came with stability in my stack, that will be the focus for the rest of my year. The only changes I can perceive are with 1 or 2 modules in the customs if I feel like they stick out and could be improved, but nothing drastic. I’m not going to be some little recon’ed bitch.
Stability. Consistency. This is the key to growth.
A couple of days ago, I had a dream about a girl (not anyone I knew, she looked like a combination of my ex, a girl I currently work with, and Selena Gomez) that went from a falling-in-love adventure, to a sex dream, to one of deep sadness and loneliness.
Today, I have a dream about a girl from my past who I lost contact with - she came to stay at my house, for some reason my father was there and tried to abuse her and I but I protected her and fought my father. Then she stayed with me and it was fun, the time we spent together reminded me of the time we used to spend together when we were in school. One thing led to another and we began to kiss, and then I suddenly became hyper-aware of the fact that this was a dream, and then I woke up.
This is a girl from my past who has only come into my thoughts twice in the past 2 years, through 2 different dreams - the first was in a dream when I was running CFW, where she was frustrated with me because I “betrayed” her. She’s probably the person who I regret losing contact with the most during my depression/The Great Purge of my personal life.
Now she appears again in my life, this time through what I assume is the work of Daredevil. I wanted a social focused sub and I’m getting a romance sub instead.
As much as a part of me wants to avoid a relationship for the time being while I focus on my self and my own development, the other half of me craves a partner and feels quite lonely.
In my entire adult life, the longest period I went without being with someone was about 10 months and those 10 months were filled with growth, upheaval, change.
Right now we’re approaching 6 months and I have experienced a lot of growth once again in those 6 months. I develop so much more as a person when I’m alone, and I hold myself back when I am with someone. This makes me fear the idea of being in a relationship, but at the same time I feel lonely and I miss being with a woman.
Casual sex is out of the question because it goes against my moral and religious values, and kinda feels gross to me; I briefly partook in it when I was 19, and it never felt good.
My only option is a relationship, and a worthwhile one. But I need to find the right person, one where I can be comfortable continuing my growth and development.
The biological male impulse to reproduce frustrates me. It just feels like a distraction from my current short-term goals, and a waste of time that could be better spent on my actual career and intellect goals like developing my computer skills by learning more coding, learning about pentesting or my personal intellect goals, like learning more languages (Arabic and Spanish mostly - I know a bit but I want to actually get good at both, to the point where I can have a conversation with someone).
Man, I literally made a plan for the next 7 months yesterday. One dream later and my bitch-ass wants to run Heartsong smfh
Today felt great. Those ZP dreams are something, I felt like I really was able to be relaxed today. Feels like the dreams are “reps” of social experience that I get while sleeping, which is literally the definition of working while others are sleeping (and embracing “the dark”, as my previous journal so aptly put it).
Mogul unlocks your fucking life, wow.
Hung out with people tonight, never felt more out of place in my life ever, while simultaneously being social and respectful of everyone.
I just hated the mentality and the demeanour of almost every person there, and I’m frustrated about attending. It’s so weird, I’ve never felt more cringe at myself after going out than now, I’ve genuinely never felt this way before. I wasn’t antisocial too which is the weirdest part, I just went on autopilot and did what I needed.
I was able to pick one person to speak with (I had never met most of the people there) and turns out he was the only person there who’s mentality I could resonate with and sure enough, he was the only person there with who lived the life I’m working to get.
Ngl, I think it’s done for me with social outings. Unless it’s my closest people (who operate on a similar frequency), I’m genuinely not interested.
I’ve been feeling lonely lately, and it’s clear that I wasn’t missing out. Think I have a social insecurity of sorts, and I need to stop compromising myself to fulfill that insecurity. It’s useless, just level the fuck up.
This is the power of Daredevil and Mogul combining together, incredible.
Man, Mogul has given me the biggest money insecurity I’ve ever experienced in my life. I feel like I need more, I’m not satisfied, I’m not happy with what I’ve got and I want more.
I am getting distracted by temptation.
What are my goals for my subliminal journey?
I want my stack to exemplify the ERB principle. I want to tackle the most important worldly aspects of my life.
I want to have a sub that enhances my ability to succeed in my career quickly. A wealth-driven subliminal.
I want a sub to enhance my own archetype, ease in social situations, supreme confidence and relaxation.
I want a physical sub, to drive my physical growth in sport, strength and aesthetics.
So, what is the plan of action towards that?
Kaizen v2 fulfills the first criteria, but the problem with Kaizen is Spartan. I am slightly compromising Kaizen with the physical component of Spartan, but it’s because I don’t have space with the rest of my stack for good reasons (which I will explain). At least Spartan can be used as part of the energy element, and be put to good use. Kaizen is less of a work-focused sub with Spartan’s inclusion, and more of a total life productivity sub.
The reason why I don’t have space for a physical sub (the 3rd goal of my subliminal stack), is because of the 2nd goal becoming my primary focus now. Daredevil is incredible, but I genuinely feel that combining its effects with Khan would be such a potent recipe, and exactly what I’m looking for with my 2nd goal criteria.
But I can’t make a Daredevil/Khan custom, unless I want to melt into misery from recon. I need to set out on the Khan journey and build that necessary foundation if I want to create my ideal social custom which would combine Daredevil with Khan 4 and True Sell. So Khan has to occupy a slot in the stack until I complete my journey on it, so the concession is trying out Love Bomb with Daredevil instead. I am a little hesitant because I’ve never tried LB, only LBFH. Its effects are what I would love to see with Daredevil though, so I’m looking forward to seeing them combine together once I’ve done enough deep work with Daredevil solo.
Once the Khan journey ends next February, I can rebuild my stack once again.
Daredevil+Khan4+True Sell.
QL4+Mogul+RICH Crypto.
Spartan+LoS+ME.
That’s the goal for 2024. Get to Ramadan 2024, reset my stack via spiritual healing, and then implement this crazy stack. I’ll be turning 30 in 2025, I’m doing everything I can now to make 30 the ultimate launchpad for myself and my growth.
6 digits is the fucking beginning.
Gotta thank Invictus for his recommendation of Victory’s Call, that combined with Mogul has been such a potent combination it’s incredible.
Shit I’ve put off for literal years, being accomplished in front of me. My life is changing radically as we speak.
Me of 3 years ago, looking at me now, would be so happy it’s incredible. He would have cried tears of joy knowing that in 3 years, I’m in the position that I’m in now. He wouldn’t have been able to believe it, he wouldn’t have understood what happened in between for me to reach this point, or what had to happen for me to get there. Me of 3 years ago would have been so fucking proud of me today, there are no words to describe it; it’s 2 different people basically.
Cheers to me in 3 years. The work I do now, the grit I demonstrate now, is what will pay off in the long run. Bite down. The method works. The universe returns whatever you give to it.