Play this
My 13 year old son plays stuff like this ⦠he started when he was 9 though!!!
I did not know that but I do now
Seductress got me growing my nails the way I wanted them!!! Itās been a practice of discipline both mentally emotionally and physically, but itās getting there.
Au naturale. No gel or acrylic or whatever else. That stuff damaged my nails so much before. I tried using gel polish last week and my nails seemingly rejected it so I am staying this natural route.
I ordered a glass nail file. I may start going for basic manicures no polish every few weeks because it feels so good. I get pedicures all year round because as a yogi I am barefoot a lot! I mean majority of the time.
Day whatever ~ Seductress full loop
Hereās my morning rant. I was having some pretty heavy recon yesterday but Iām much better at the moment.
No matter how much people say that shadow work doesnāt matter, I donāt believe you can bypass your shadow side 100%. Maybe Iām wrong but I most certainly know I wouldnāt be where I am today without diving into my shadow side. My dark side. I see where things are showing up still and becoming more curious of how those experiences have come to pass. Itās all by my own doing or some other dark kinky persons doing. I was open to it and accepted their gift. Everyone is me pushed out ~ so some part of me believed that dark kinky freaky deaky shit could happen to me.
Okay. Well thatās helpful to know. Neville speaks on the importance of the fundamentals of the law.
āThe purpose of true metaphysics is to bring about a rebirth or radical psychological change in the individual. Such a change cannot take place until the individual first discovers the self that he would change. This discovery can be made only through an uncritical observation of his reactions to life. The sum total of these reactions defines the individualās state of consciousness, and it is the individualās state of consciousness that attracts the situations and circumstances of his life.
So the starting point of true metaphysics, on its practical side, is self-observation in order to discover oneās reactions to life, reactions that form oneās secret self ā the cause of the phenomena of life. With Emerson, I accept the fact that āMan surrounds himself with the true image of himself . . . what we are, that only can we see.ā There is a definite connection between what is outer and what is inner in man, and it is ever our inner states that attract our outer life. Therefore, the individual must always start with himself. It is oneās self that must be changed.
Man, in his blindness, is quite satisfied with himself, but heartily dislikes the circumstances and situations of his life. He feels this way, not knowing that the cause of his displeasure lies not in the condition nor the person with whom he is displeased, but in the very self he likes so much. Not realizing that āhe surrounds himself with the true image of himselfā and that āwhat he is, that only can he see,ā he is shocked when he discovers that it has always been his own deceitfulness that made him suspicious of others.ā ~ Neville Goddard
I am currently reading a book called Existential Kink where she explains why people arenāt having success with LOA or other new age practices.
Their shadow. The unconscious. The dark kinky desires.
The parts of ourselves that most donāt want to look at or acknowledge. The parts that are resisted. Repressed. Hidden but revealed in many ways if you really pay attention.
She basically explains that in order to get what you truly want you must get off on what you donāt want that youāre currently experiencing. We may consciously think we donāt want those things but deep inside thereās a part of us that does want it. We essentially do get everything we want but may not be enjoying those things consciously. Some part of us wanted those things and got them.
Our most dominate beliefs conscious or unconscious arr manifested.
Once we get really honest with ourselves by noticing what we currently are experiencing, become aroused by all of it, something magical happens.
We learn to love all of ourselves. Every single dirty kinky fucked up part. From that place, freedom awaits us. To actually start enjoying and manifesting more effortlessly what we consciously want coming from a different place.
Quote from book: We do always get what we deeply desire, but most of us arenāt that aware that much of what we deeply desire is some highly unpleasant, painful, secret, repressed, fucked up shit.
who said that to you?
Various LOA peeps. I donāt agree though.
Day 17 ~ Stark & LBFH full loops
Iāve decided that once wash out begins I am not resuming listening until the new year. Let the subs process bloom and execute.
I may have to do a short cycle of EB to get a website built where I list who I am, my background, services/pricing & a store where my replay yoga classes can be purchased.
I donāt desire an email list but people swear by it.
I love to write daily rants of gold so maybe thatās the place for that or a blog section of my website.
I probably need to get on some form of platform too. Itās been suggested here many times.
I have resistance around this.
I got on a call other night with 2 of my friends talking about working together on something. Sounded cool. Noticed some hesitations. Iām ready for more and new experiences for sure.
I have a lot to offer. Iām full of ideas. Need to execute them in new ways for sure.
Something to sit with over the holidays on wash out.
I see angel numbers all the time, not new. Seeing 777 often is however a new discovery.
Seductress:
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Got a glass nail file and filed my nails into an oval shape pretty good. I kept feeling this urge to do it. Before I just clipped my nails really short.
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Consistently doing my morning and night skin routine again. My face feels so soft and clear.
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I look in the mirror until I feel satisfied with what I see.
I was thinking today how I wonder if the objectives from the subs have lasting effects ⦠specifically physical shifting.
Day 18 ~ rEsT dAy
What a crazy dream world pertaining to some parts of me that I was definitely self judging in a not so loving way. Parts that felt scared, worried, icky, anxious, fickle and other things too. The girl who changed her mind a lot followed by defence mechanisms to try eliminating shame or guilt.
I donāt remember too many details at this time.
I slept with 2 different men in the dream with whom I had slept with previously after leaving my fiancƩ.
I went a bit lucid having some form of inner conversations defending my case. In the waking world I am currently abstinent.
I was hanging out with people I wasnāt too familiar with while having this looming thought of my period. It went away and came back the next day. I remember looking at a pad full of blood thinking, āhow is that even possible?ā
I do see where I had past traumas with sex, periods, pregnancy and having had 2 abortions due to being so fertile even when ācarefulā during sexual activity.
It feels good to work out these unconscious kinks I have still sticking in my deep tissues.
There was a time when I wouldnāt talk about periods or my abortions. I wouldnāt even say the word period. I freaked out every month worrying if Iād have a missed period. Why was pregnancy so easy for me? All 3 of my kids werenāt planned.
Itās liberating to speak on this.
I feel this sense of love and compassion for the men on the other end of this.
LBFH is doing healing in very subtle ways.
I do now see where I have felt deep shame and humiliation for my actions of the past. Thereās no more covering them up.
Time to be naked and free.
Just got back from taking my girls to Santa Village with my ex fiancƩ. He was getting super close to me several times. Just standing in my bubble,
No biggy. He even brought up my invitation for him to join us for a Christmas/our daughterās birthday vacation. It felt so different today. Holy heck!
You look like female version of Bob Marley with that cap
Day 19 ~ seductress full loopy !
Feels like I didnāt get much deep sleep last night. Went through various processing moments. The inner workings of my Mind are quite fascinating. Not to be feared or rejected but to be loved and integrated back into wholeness.
I did some gentle like yoga this morning with a focus on grounding and opening up. Alternate nostril breathing. Sensual somatic touch followed by a little sage while sipping my mushroom coffee. Ended up making 2 shorts for YT and a Reel for Facebook. Already thinking of my drums and itās not even 10am.
Listened to this song and had a little crying session. Reflections of my relationship to the ex fiancĆ©. The love I feel for him, for us, even after 3 years apart in the physical sense. I feel so deeply connected to him on another plane or dimension. It feels like I am married to him in the ā5D.ā
What is it about me that has me so smitten by him?
Iāve been bringing it back to me. This is my experience. Iām done seeking answers outside of me relating to this matter. It hasnāt helped me anyways. I spent 1000ās on psychics during recon last year. Iām not doing that anymore.
I am very much gifted as an intuitive with various psychic abilities. Why go seeking that which I already am?
Anyways, almost wash out time until the new year. A few more days!
Just got the idea to make YouTube videos that are private to only be viewed by those with the link⦠from hereā¦
To share my subliminal experience through videos feels highly desirable at the moment.
I get frustrated with my keyboard on my phone. It changes words, has a mind of its own!
Maybe I do it, maybe I donāt.
I have realizations throughout the day about my āwinsā relating to my stack and think to myself how cool it would probably be to share about it on video.
Maybe during washout Iāll share the bloom effectā¦. Maybe notā¦.
This is an evolution of giving reviews
Firstly we have had only written ones but the future lies in personal videos