Euphoria + getting high = the most addicting high ever.
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Yo seeing your results with Euphoria and another user has a custom like this one, makes me wanna make my own lol however even though Minds Eye and LBFH is already part of my stack I want LBFH to do its thing before I decide to make a custom with it.
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I hope you know that the main reason I made a custom with those two is just for convincing 
Why listen to 2 subs when I can just combine them haha
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I have some realizations from my dream last night, and the one thing that I can conclude is that an awakening is coming my way.
What’s more surprising is that today I got woken up by being called “Sir”, and while we always had at least one maid, none ever was the one wake me up, but today, out of the blue I get awoken to the following: “Good morning sir, there’s breakfast ready for you downstairs, please let me know if you’d like to have it in your room instead.”
That was somewhat weird, considering the fact that in the dream, I was given a crown, but it wasn’t like gold crown or something, it was made of pure light, like it was light in the shape of a crown, and the one giving me that crown also was wrapped in light, but here’s the fascinating part:
All the light came from me at the start of the dream, and they all came from my heart side.
So why is that fascinating? Cause yesterday, I didn’t wanna mention this to anyone so that I didn’t cause anyone to worry unnecessarily, but I had somewhat of a prolonged sting in the top side of my heart, and it kept on appearing and disappearing, but towards the end of the night, I noticed it only appeared when I was alone and deep in thoughts, so there’s that.
Other than that, I woke up to over 15 notifications from different people and groups (each chat counting as 1 notification, regardless of the number of messages), and what’s funny is that some of those who texted weren’t even in contact with me for quite some time (2 of them haven’t talked to me since 2020), and right now, I’m on my way to my cousins’ place, as they were among the people who texted me, and I’m already getting texts from girl asking about when I’ll see her today and if I can just go to her now instead 
This is all funny because the one module that was going to replace “Earthshaker sexuality” in my custom was “Aura of Craving”, but seems like people crave me enough 
.
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I’m ready.
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Well yeah I figured that I want to combine them too for that purpose but I’m waiting for a better job first, so I’m not worried about it. Plus from what I gathered y’all listened for like 10+ hours per listening day in the past, so I feel I can handle 1 hour per listening day lol
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Interesting, to say the least.
Sometimes I wonder what was it that I needed to reconcile in order to finally feel ready, but now that I do, I’m not stopping.
It’s time for the superior Invictus to take over, again.
Last transformation was good, I went from a spoiled pretty boy to a successful man, but after that I went back to the flamboyant spoiled guy (self spoiled this time around), but now, it’s time to take life to the next level, and I won’t be satisfied till I start entering rooms full of strangers, who would all know my name before I even step inside.
and so will you all.
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So I’ve been smoking hash quite a bit for the last one month or so, and what I’ve come to realize is that it’s just stupid, like don’t get me wrong, it’s fun and feels nice in its own way, but I seem to be getting into this habit of wanting to do it all the time, regardless of what I’m about to do afterwards, and the worst part? Unnecessary anxiety about getting caught as it’s pretty dodgy here and can get a local guy 10 years behind bars, so not really what I would want.
On the other hand, I have natural tolerance to side effects of nutmeg, the high is better, more joy, ecstatic, and generally I achieve more, even strength wise at the gym.
For context: nowadays I’m pushing 28kg max for 12 reps on each arm during incline dumbbell presses while high on hash, but nutmeg, I was easily pushing 34kgs for 12 reps on each arm.
Now I’m just gonna reflect on this habit of mine…
why am I so addicted to stimulation?
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I am happy you made this choice
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Why do you enjoy comfort so much, when all it does is take away your ambitions?
Where am I even headed in life?
I have no clue, all I’ve been doing for the last few months is let myself sail.
I make tons of customs, to see how the next “new” archetype would feel, how newer modules feel, how they express themselves, how differently people treat me within a day’s time, but it doesn’t take rocket science to deduce that I’m just messing around.
I’m just wasting 2 of my precious resources (time and money) for no apparent reason, other than just wanting to try new “flavors”, and that’s where I went wrong.
Do you guys know when was the last time I was truly conquering life and succeeding more and more, with new opportunities popping up on a daily basis?
Here’s a reminder:
At that time, I was just soaring high, got a nice job, got popular from day 1 at my workplace, my dating life has already been perfect, I was consistently getting bigger and bigger, and overall I was just becoming the embodiment of 90% of the male population, and what did I do with that?
I got comfortable.
Way too comfortable.
And don’t get me wrong, life has been fun, but that’s all it’s been, fun.
I often rant about how it feels like I’m already so far ahead of guys my age, but what did I do about it?
Nothing, just kept enjoying the glory and got comfortable with just maintaining it.
I lost ambition.
Even when it came to gym, I always talked about maximizing my gains and stuff, but once I would get complimented, and/or get stares in public, I would subconsciously chill out and take it easy in the gym to maintain my body and sexual value, and then end up ranting again about how I’m not gaining fast enough.
Now don’t get me wrong, I do look good at 71kg and 10% body fat, but is that my end goal? Hell no, that body composition can get me laid with multiple chicks, definitely, but it won’t get me to the level where I’m at my utmost limits, nor is it the peak human condition that I strive for.
So yeah guys, this is me coming clean to y’all, I’ve been too comfortable, and that is the most self destructive state I’ve ever been in, and that’s coming from someone who was in therapy for depression and trauma (don’t worry about that, was quite a few years back now, and I’m doing much better, with and without drugs).
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Hey, you inspire me. I think it’s probably focusing most on what our destiny in this life is that will keep us from derailing too much in futile, shallow tangents… but it’s okay to breathe and have fun along the way… we are supposed to love our time here on the journey.
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What are you trying to build? Where do you want to be in the next 5 years? What’s the plan? Start thinking/planning for the next rung, and you’ll get out of your comfort zone. It’s perfectly OK to revel in your successes. In fact, it’s very healthy.
But, if you’re feeling complacent, then start thinking/planning for your next step.
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Thank you both for your comments, and while yes, I know it’s fine to enjoy success, but not so much that it becomes self destructive to your identity.
If you are happy with how you are presented, but not how you feel about yourself deep down, you’re gonna end up reaching a point where you might feel like there’s a void inside, because the “enjoyment of success” will lead to extreme comfort over time, especially in my situation, where I have a confirmed raise and a better job waiting for me to start in January (can’t start now cause of the army service), so in that case, it is pretty self destructive, cause comfort is the enemy of ambition, and once that ember of ambition dies, it doesn’t feel as good while you reignite it, because while it is possible to reignite it to be bigger than ever before, it’s gonna hurt you in the process as you realize that you are the sole reason for extinguishing the previous flame.
As for what I wanna do in 5 years?
Well, that all starts with the new job in January, mostly because my whole career path changes with the transfer, so even if I made plans for what I wanna achieve with work, I don’t even know what I’d be working on first, so I’ve just been trying to improve my interpersonal skills, as my job revolves around public and business relations.
I’m stopping Euphoria and going back to Mind’s Eye.
It just doesn’t feel the same, and I don’t need LBFH anymore (at least not now).
The major title? Alone?
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Yep.
Nope.
You see Fahrenheit ZP up there?
I updated it 
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Imo sex is the most emotionally charged thing. Many men literally see it as a rejection of their whole being when they not get sex.
Plus, a society that virtually dispalys female sexuality EVERYWHERE has men ingrained that this is the holy grail of success. To get the dig wet.
This was the initial reason for me. One of the very first subs SC made was about sex. Most people come to magick for sex or money.
It’s what drives many.
HOWEVER,
once you’re on the path long enough, you will eventually see the shallowness in one’s actions. How to ascend the primal drive to higher realms and why this is where you find all your happiness, peace, and success.
But I think, the darker side, the lower vibe, the shadow side, needs to be integrated first before you can get there.
I did not gain access to higher knowledge until I overcame my lower instincts. Coincidence? Maybe, but I dont believe in that. I think this was decided intentionally, so I put it to good use!
Once a person reaches that point, there are ALL the subs waiting for him 
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guess that’s what i’m doing at the moment, which also makes sense when you see my forum activity being less than before.
i should start posting more haha, especially what i’m running now
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@DarkPhilosopher @RVconsultant
Can either of you close this journal please?
Thank you.
If anyone is interested, I’ve started a new journal with a new custom, with the new ZP experimental build.