Sorry for my bad english, yes I meant don’t care about others opinions.
That’s hilarious because, with my perfectionism tendencies I can end up just doing that.
that’s deep. But this must come from a revelation.
Not at all, this is very useful, I am quite clueless about my subconscious behaviours, my mind is tricking me in multiple ways. I am running Wanted and I am doing some light therapy in the same time. Ascension is too strong for me.
Now that you’re running subs, it will be “tricking” you in good and healthy ways.
I put it in quotes because I don’t think it’s actually tricking you at all.
Just because you don’t understand something, it does not mean that that thing is therefore “tricking” you. Your subconscious mind is not tricking you anymore than your liver, your gallbladder, or your Calculus textbook are “tricking” you. The ones with the mistaken assumptions are us. We were given these amazing, priceless mind/body systems—light years beyond iPhones and super-computers in complexity—and for some reason we think they should be easy enough for a child to understand and explain. 
. Well, they’re not!
"Thought Exercises"
Whenever I look at what someone else has achieved, and ask myself "Would I like to achieve something like it too?", I can mostly give a Yes or No answer.
But …
When I look at someone else and ask myself "Would I want to trade places with him? Have his life, as is, in it’s entirety?", my answer is almost always invariably, NO.
Meaning…
I haven’t found one single person yet, who has had it perfect, by my standards.
So if everyone is a loser, then what’s there to compare.
So if I’m not even willing to switch places with DiCaprio or Musk, then it means I must be having it real good.
The more I think about trading places with someone else, the more I realize how different we all are from each other … our own unique journeys, strengths, hobbies, scars, and adjacent possible opportunities.
I support this view pretty much 100%. (As usual. It is a @Simon original, after all.)
On the other hand, that’s not what the topic of this thread asked.
That is what the word ‘compare’ means.
There’s nothing in there about envy, perfection, emulation, or trading places.
The ‘thought experiment’ that you described above was fundamentally a form of comparison.
I guess the original post meant to ask, ‘Do people with high self-esteem ever want to switch places or switch lives with others?’
But it didn’t.
It asked whether ‘you compare yourself’.
Everyone does compare. Even to genuinely be aware that you would never want to be anyone other than yourself, requires that you first compare.
Our responses to those comparisons can be very diverse:
“I want to be him/her”
“No thank you, I’ll keep what I’ve got. I like it.”
“This whole premise is a bit ridiculous. My very desires are an aspect of the person I am now. If I were to transform into that person, I would no longer even have the original desires that prompted the transformation in the first place, and so it would not be satisfying.” [I am pretty partial to this one.]
And on and on.
So we all end up in our own points-of-view.
But the comparisons occur nonetheless.
And there are so many other useful applications for comparison that have nothing to do with envying or trading places with someone.
Exhibit A: Empathy
Exhibit B: Learning from the Experiences of Others
Exhibit C: Expanding your World to include more than just one narrow point of view
Like pretty much everything else, interpersonal Comparison has its beneficial and non-beneficial forms.
Yeah I am pretty bad at explaining. 
You’re good at explaining. The first post is clear.
You said ‘sometimes I come out above and sometimes below’.
That’s one kind of comparison. Ranking things hierarchically.
Simon expands the frame beyond hierarchy. Apples and oranges.
That’s one of the answers. To expand your comparisons. You’re not going to erase comparison. And if you couldn’t compare anymore, it would make for a very confusing time when you tried to enjoy watching the Olympics.
“What is everyone excited about? These people are all performing exactly like everyone else!”
Or music concerts:
“What’s the big deal? That sounds like me in the shower!”
And on and on.
Comparison is necessary. But other things are necessary too.
You’ve got to add other ingredients. Like self-love and acceptance. The ability to focus on the task at hand. Awareness of your own dreams, attributes, and of what makes you and others unique.
Here’s a good book that deals with this whole topic:
Check out her discussion of ‘linking’ versus ‘ranking’.
I did read this thread, and I do understand what you are asking.
I’m going to give you some ideas that may be off topic.
If you are concerned about your self-esteem, Ascension might help.
I’m guessing you are a man. If so, GLM might help.
There is also Regeneration, Elixir, and DR.
For your CONSCIOUS mind, how about “Ten Days to Self-Esteem” by David D Burns M.D., or another book by him called “Feeling Good”, which is generally marketed to people who are depressed, but there are skills in there that could potentially help anyone.
Hey @RVconsultant thanks for that.
I thought about healing for one cycle. I agree I will run Regeneration/Elixir, the combo seems great and Saint recommended it.
On the other side, Ascension and GLM are too hard alpha for me (or to me rn), I will start slow with Commander and Sanguine to focus only on being stress free, positive, confident, positivity, and marshalling my ressources.
I will read the recommended yours and @Malkuth recommended books and re-assess after a cycle or two.
By the way you did run Blue Skies module right? I am still confused on what it does exactly?
Actually, I think that is a great idea!
Yes.
For me, I’m not sure what it did. Seriously, for me, it was like listening to just a trickling stream.
So I would recommend entering a support ticket to get more details about this module.
Where I am now:
And listening to Louise Hay on the background. I found her the least woo as she just talk about beliefs.
I’m not OP but I want one
Well the pattern is that everyone sees comparison as something bad which should be stopped
But I’m not sure what you are trying to tell exactly - that comparison is actually a good thing and should motivate you or what?
Because that’s my initial thinking on comparing yourself to others. I compare myself all the time but it’s not tied to negative emotions for me, it’s more like “This person is better than me at X. I want to get to the same level or higher and they show me that it’s possible so what can I learn from them?”
My other thought is that you are hinting at the fact that comparing yourself with others is bad but you can compare yourself with your yesterday self, for example. Have you gotten better or not? That would also be a useful thing IMO
This is exactly my mindset. When I meet people who are very competent at something I’m not, but I’m interested in, I get really excited.
Comparisons come naturally.
What’s important is what you do with it.
Whether you suffer, thrive, give up, become elated, threatened, motivated, jealous, etc, it’s up to you.
That’s how I see it. The comparison itself is not the problem, it’s how you react & what you do with it that’s important. What’s the best thing you can do with all of those variables laid in front of you?
As you are writing about self-worth, I want to know about your thoughts on self compassion and how one could go about developing it.
Brother these posts are really helpful, I identified certain patterns in my life where I attach self worth to them. For example, I decide my self worth on how attractive my partner is and how she does things that make me feel wanted/validated along with also validation from the guys about dating this attractive women. But I still don’t really know how to stop deciding my self worth like this, how do I let go of this program?
Thank you man, I appreciate it. I’ve been getting closer and closer to these realizations lately, along with strengthening my self worth and de-attaching it from the variables but these posts just made it click.