Thanks, I do not know man, I am quite chill on Khan st1, nothing unusual, no anger bursts, just doing my thing. But everyone is different, right? But you are doing good.
I have more of a problem deciding if I wanna go the third cycle with st1 or rather go with st2. But still have plenty of time until my washout.
In the self development bubble I was a part of, there was this notion of the partner mirroring your behavior and finding your wounds and putting his fingers in with minimal effort.
But this was considered good. Because it shows you where you still have to heal. It directs your awareness straight to your biggest issues.
And I can only confirm this from my own 3.5 year relationship that started inntlm this bubble.
We’re triggering each other often. But then we look at the root issue and try to heal/ solve it.
We also noticed that the main issues we have play a major role in the others life as well, only in another wrapping. So they might look differently on the outside, but if you go deeper, you’ll realize that they have the same root/core.
Another notion was that, since it’s your issue, you will make the same experience in every single relationship until it’s solved. Because you will always (unconsciously) look for a partner that puts her finger in that wound so you can acknowledge it and work on it’s healing.
I didn’t make this experience as of yet, since I’m still in my first relationship, but lots of friends confirmed it.
I am more than happy that I have a very conscious partner at my side that is willing to work on her issues and helps me working on mine.
I believe that as well. What you said just reminded me of a quote form the book " The superior man ". Which i have not read in a very long time which would be great to re read! Much thanks
Week 1/3 , 2nd Cycle
Mon: Khan ST1 + EoG 2025 ST1, 2 Min 30 sec
Wed: Khan ST1 + EoG 2025 ST1, 2 Min 30 sec
Fri: Khan ST1 + EoG 2025 ST1, 2 Min 30 sec
First week is going great so far. I’m beyond impressed by the unexpected money manifestations from EoG Stage 1. However, Total Breakdown (TB) seems to dominate about 75% of my awareness. Before diving deeper into recon and its effects, I want to clarify two types:
Type 1 Recon: This occurs when the sub tackles issues, beliefs, and habits blocking subliminal goals. The discomfort is clear and comes from a place that prioritizes growth, often accompanied by firm suggestions for improvement. For me, the symptoms are intense hunger ( which peaked during Week 2 of the 1st cycle ) and “boiling blood,” The symptoms and experiences vary depending on the user.
Type 2 Recon: Less beneficial and usually avoidable, this happens with overexposure or frequent changes in the subliminal stack. It leads to lack of focus, procrastination, overthinking, and poor decisions, stemming from a restless, survival-driven mental state. The symptoms are frequent mood swings that might lead to severe procrastination, overthinking, negative assumptions and fear. For me it’s most obvious when my focus becomes single minded on short term pleasure and escapism! Symptoms vary from user to user
Edit: This is the standard " overload " of the mental " process que "
The TB recon I usually experience is definitely Type 1 manifesting as irritability, mood swings, overthinking, and a short temper. Hunger peaks, especially noted during the second week of Cycle 1. This week, however, has been different. I’m handling the “boiling blood” more gracefully, viewing it through a new lens. What if this intensity is a glimpse of the inner state of a Khan?
From the Khan product copy: "With Khan V2, this inferno has been condensed and refined further to its most optimized form – gunpowder, ready to be utilized in myriads of ways, able to topple empires overnight."
This intensity fits. I tested it in the gym starting with a 30-minute treadmill run (8.5 km/h, 1-degree incline) before my usual 1 hour gruesome workouts. Despite no changes to my diet and the same half a cup of coffee daily, I finished the workout feeling like a mini Goggins.
Even though this is just Stage 1 - Total Breakdown, I realize it’s absurd to expect Khan’s benefits while staying the same—passive, reactive, wishful, and overly calm and rational 70% of the time. This intensity sparks desires: to amass wealth, attract extraordinary women effortlessly, and live on the edge. If life is a jungle, I want to be the beast that rules it with passion, wisdom, compassion, and ease.
These desires aren’t new, but they always felt distant—like goals meant for someone else. It’s as if I’ve lived as Person B, always admiring the life of Person A—the confident, powerful version of me who naturally achieves those things. As B, I believed I had to become A first, thinking transformation was a distant milestone. But now, I wonder—what if I’m not just chasing A anymore? What if I’m starting to experience life as A?
Maybe the discomfort isn’t just recon. Maybe it feels unsettling because it’s unfamiliar to B, but perfectly natural for A. After all, B could only imagine what A’s intensity feels like—never truly knowing it until now.
Here’s the nuance: as long as this intensity feels “uncomfortable,” I’m simply learning wield it. It’s not an excuse to be a hothead. True power lies in harnessing and integrating this energy, channeling it through a calm yet fierce state. I no longer see the “boiling blood” as something to outgrow, it’s the very power I’ve lacked to achieve my dreams.
The goal is to control the intensity, not be controlled by it. If my conclusions are correct and if I’m going about this the right way! This intensity will burn hotter and hotter in the later stages.
I am very proud of myself for undergoing this journey! In the beginning, it felt crazy doing stage 1 of two multistagers for 3 months! All the perceived fun i would be missing out on, the pressure of committing to the process and what how i might deal with the lowest lows of recon. I am currently having more fun peeling off layers and discovering myself and the world through a different lens.
On the EoG Stage 1 side, like mentioned in the last post, I am making money through absurd means without even doing anything. It’s a situational thing but to even explain but it just shows the potential of of making extra money through such a limited, conditional and barely optimal way to even consider. Got me thinking what if i had multiple door ways for different income streams?
When i opened youtube i found a particular 5 hour long video of a certain " most googled man " and decided to watch hear it out of curiosity! His " lessons " represented what a hustler is and does to generate as much money as possible using the most realistic and morally compromised ways. There were some golden nuggets here and there, but i could tell someone fully embodying that mindset is living within a self made cage in a brutal " dog eats dog " world where monetary gain is everything
It was a valuable experience not only for the golden nuggets here and there, but i immediately knew that what he does is not that different than 90% plus of organizations and other grifters do. The only difference is branding and what each pretend to " align " with for the same end! Money is power, Power is everything! To me that experience was the a mirror of humanity! the symptom of a disease
Then i felt like seeing what Owen Cook is up to. It’s clear that he’s been on a spiritual path and has heavily rebranded since the old days when i used to watch RSD. It was such a contrast to what i listened to earlier today from " hustler ". I say this with complete neutrality and curiosity! I am far beyond emotional attachment to influencers, social media, politics etc. That is no cage i would willingly waste my time, energy and very soul into long enough to realize how dumb it was to even care. I can learn from anyone and anything!
Now i am beginning to see myself creating something! What type of content/brand could i make using the resources i have, being present & aware of the way the world operates as well as having a blast? It’s been on my mind for a long time now… And everyday i feel like i am getting closer and closer to that! I can fully envision myself doing that thing which meets those requirements. It’s not weird, cringe, alien to me anymore. I know 1000% I can do it… It’s already there… I simply need to put my fingers on it
Very cool to see EOG1 has had you already making money.
It’s actually getting you results NOW, not just building the foundation for results later.
By the most unlikely, laziest income stream currently available. Got me thinking what if i had the real deal. Scratch that, even a dried up riverbed would do for starters
Tomorrow will be the halfway point week in this journey. The rapid and ever snowballing growth i’ve undergoing is beyond rediculous. It’s been nowhere near as difficult, challenging and painful as i believed it would be. Things really do get easier with time, a firm direction and solid plan.
I could not begin to comprehend how unaware and shortsighted i was as a person at the start of this year. I cant even concieve using subs in the same half assed ways i used to.
My gym workouts are becoming easier. Today after the 30 min run, i took no break and hit shoulders stright away with above aversge intensity compared to how i usually would. I feel stronger and my energy drains extremly slow.
The 3 min micro loop mark. So far i have been progressing just as comfortably as the loop durations increased. I have yet to plateu hard enough to refrain from further increases until it settles down. Moreover, 3 min is 200% the increse from the 1 min starting point. With each week, the added 30 sec will become less substantial compared to the prior week.
Just like aging. From 5 to 10 years is a 100% increse. However from 20 to 25 its 25% increse. Same 5 years, but far less overwhelming is the years go by. So i guess
The 3 min increase brought the heat back. This journey has been like entering an RPG dungeon without knowing just how many floors or levels there are. Typically each level lasts 1 to 3 days. I would enter it under leveled and I’m quickly crushed unless i take some form of action.
The earlier floors required adjustments: I passed those by learning and consistently sleeping from 9 - 11 pm to 6-7 am every day. Another challenge was optimizing my action. I learned to be comfortable doing all i can do action wise be it the basics such keeping my apartment tidy and organized, drinking more water and other small actions etc. I feel zero desire or need to watch p¤¤n anymore.
Up next i was confronted with plenty of limiting beliefs during the day, and batshit ludicrous nightmares during the night.
The next few levels required being comfortable in the unknown and the uncomfortable. Those are far trickier since there isn’t always something to be done about them. This has more or less remain consistent since then with little to no tangible rewarding results except the joy i afford myself for dealing with it better and better.
The pattern is clear by now. It’s going deeper and deeper each time. Aligned with my conscious guidance and goals, the subs are not mealy affording me to become " healthy ", " happy " or " successful " in traditional terms. No, those are byproducts of a much grander goal. To become someone unrecognizable.
The question is no longer about " What if you don’t really want all of that? what if it’s your ego, fears and delusions of grandeur? " Not anymore for i have fully discarded such notions long ago.
The question now is: How bad do you really want it? What price are you willing to pay for it? How much discomfort are you willing to overcome and thrive on in order to reach those goals? What are you really made of? Do you still believe that you need only overcome few floors to reach your happy ending?
For something to be gained, something most be lost and replaced. I cant take a breath without giving one. After discovering the depths of what i was chained with, i am discovering the cost of my dreams. My previous progress got me out of my old shackles and set me truly free. Now i am discovering that getting out of hell does not mean reaching the top!
This heat is no longer felt physically. I don’t feel irritated, frustrated or hopeless. It’s has taken a far scarier form. It’s calm, collected and serious. It’s questioning my ability to endure a dark path where only the step Infront is available. That there is no guarantee it will be a step forward, backwards or a trap that resets me all the way back, or worse. Sure the next step could be it but i can no longer use that as the only source of motivation! I have learned that the only consistent motivation is feeling proud of mealy taking that step, for nothing else is good enough to get me where I’m want to be.
For the future me reading this. Whether you achieved 0%, 10%, 30%, 80% or 100% of your goals. I vow to walk each step to it’s end, wherever it may be. Today i am strongest human alive. Today i am victorious. For no matter what determination, bravery and power i muster it feels never enough and short lived. Yet i do all i can and more. Heaven or Hell, this reality can go fk itself. What we do is all that has, are or ever will matter. Bring it on! There is nothing left to fight
After lots of reasonable contemplation I believe i found my inner gold.
Pros:
1: It utilizes that which i am naturally gifted at, Breaking down complex systems and abstract ideas into something tangible and digestible. Also, my unique personality and values will allow me to stand out.
2: It’s also something I am very passionate about which would need little to no motivation to execute
3: It would add massively unique benefits to others because of it’s uniqueness, It also drives me since I get very passionate about helping others with things only i can.
4: Very minimal upstart cost.
5: I am the content and the brand. Little to no logistical issues. It will be the bread and butter for all which to come.
6: Multi layered, and almost never ending. Could be milked as long as i put in the work, continue to improve along side the consumer.
7: It can be used alongside the secondary money-making options which will be available as the main value source which i will acquire through experience, knowing the consumers, my skills in marketing and sales as well as potential offers, collaborations etc
8: It’s a great starting point for my current skills. The content will be evolving slowly enough where i get to taste what it’s like to have an audience. I will be growing in skill using the different social media platforms alongside my slowly increasing audience
9: I will have all the time in the world to learn how to deal with haters, backlash etc… Tiny small doses that will give me the experience, knowledge, understanding and resilience any one with reasonable exposure will eventually deal with.
10: I can start with this alone! My progress and wealth are in my hands.
Cons:
1: It might take a long while before i see a single dollar. It will take longer still to reach a place where i can rely solely on it. Like planting a seed that needs lots of nourishment, care and protection.
2: I will have to develop and grow using skills i am unfamiliar with such as marketing, filming, video editing, Knowledge around social media platforms etc.
3: Since i am the brand and the content, I must continue to evolve alongside it.
4: Blowing up suddenly and going unexpectedly viral could be a double edged sword. I might get the much sought after exposure at the risk of being unable to capitalize on it.
5: The upfront costs could be a little steeper than initially expect.
6: Before it makes decent money, I cant sustain the work with mere motivation!
7: There will most likely be pitfalls and mistakes due to inexperience and by lacking a solid network.
8: I can not start immediately, but it’s possible in the near future.
Now most of the " Cons " are not really that bad. Just something to consider logically. This idea is still in its infant states. I do not need to figure anything out which isn’t " the next 2 steps ahead of me ". While there is much left unknown, I do not need to know it immediately or even in the near future.
Week 2/3 , 2nd Cycle
Mon: Khan ST1 + EoG 2025 ST1, 3 Min
Wed: Khan ST1 + EoG 2025 ST1, 3 Min
Fri: Khan ST1 + EoG 2025 ST1, 3 Min
2nd week of the 2nd cycle is done. I have nothing tangably mindblowing to report yet! I have not made any raidically tangable changes on my outer world yet. I might sooner or later but i re iterate. I HAVE NOTHING MINDBLOWING TO REPORT!!
That was never the point to begin with. This journey, this journal will be what i point people to when they ask how i am i so lucky, what made me become who i am… what is my secret etc…
As above so below. As within so without
I am effortlessly going full throttle on tacking action on every level… Spiritually with my consistent 1 hour + meditations, Mentally with the every day action towards my goals and physically by surpassing my limits at the gym… This is what real progress looks like for someone who had could be described as having an overpowering leg on his neck against the cold for about 95% of his life. The cause of that leg no longer matters and neither does it’s effects.
It’s all mere 1s and Zeros… I am no closer in understanding the logic of those numbers as was at 5 years old. But i now know how to turn the unwanted 1s into Zeros, and turn zeros into the desired 1s
Week 3/3 , 2nd Cycle
Mon: Khan ST1 + EoG 2025 ST1, 3 Min 30 sec
Wed: Khan ST1 + EoG 2025 ST1, 3 Min 30 sec
Fri: Khan ST1 + EoG 2025 ST1, 3 Min 30 sec
This week has been different. No recon in the traditional sense, things are going smoothly all around but few things seem off. I feel brain fog and lethargy despite still being sharp and aware. It’s weird because in a sense i am both simultaneously
It’s getting hard to fall asleep on time despite waking up at the same time i have for weeks and no major changes to my habits, caffeine intake or training intensity.
The gym session before the last one is where i first felt lethargic. I powerd through it with the 30 min running and the lifting. Yesterday, last gym session, was different. As i was running, around the 10 min mark, i began feeling sharp pain in the abdomen. I continued another 10 before i had enough. The pain went away after 5 min breather, I got a good workout afterwards.
My meditations have been affected as well. I feel stuck on the same awareness level just before i enter " the now " or " flow "… When it comes to meditation, there is nothing to power through. I simply set my intent and let she ship sail hands off the steering wheel.
Despite the disruptions, i feel good about how unbothered i am. My " control free " approach has somewhat stuck inside my head and there is little to no internal conflict or overthinking. Despite the lethargy, my willpower and focus have not dimmed despite feeling the effects. I don’t have a clue what is happening, could be related to the recent freezing temperatures here in Sweden. Could be something else
What might happen if you stop caffeine?
Are you drinking caffeine within 8 hours of going to sleep?
Just a small cup in the morning, same as ever. If i were to stop it would be hard to get going in the morning where i need to be most productive
Maybe you can try yerba mate or green tea instead of coffee.
For sleep, 1g of Glycine at night could make you more sleepy.
I have one trick in my sleeve when it is night and I am not really tired but I know my bedtime is coming.
I am using this app on Android ( there is also iPhone version but under a different name)
And I have bought only one let’s call it frequency ‘Delta Liquid Dream’.
It is 30 mins sound that makes your brainwaves go to a delta state and just makes you sleep. Works like a charm, many times tested.
Just lying in my bed, phone like 50 cm from my one ear, sound almost mute and this sound is playing.
thanks for the recommendations. I might try sum
As for this, I’m afraid it might interfere with the subs. I could be wrong but i tend to err on the side of causion
Dont be afraid, be a man.
Week 3/3 , 2nd Cycle Complete
Now begins the washout until Monday 3rd of Mars. This next post will be the cumulation of my current understanding addressing old issues i had in my personal and seen, hear and felt experiences with women.
To start of completely blunt. All which ever frustrated me with women was due to lack of experience, clarity and deeper understanding. As humans, we are flawed and imperfect. Worse still, perfection is our worst enemy! Those who achieve it are prisoners to it, often sacrificing far more precious things to maintain it while never being able to fully enjoy it.
I will not claim that the our biology, society, expectations, experience’s and experiences are perfect! It’s far too easy to point out flaws in others who stand on the metaphorical " other side " despite how right or wrong but that alone is no satisfactory conclusion! It’s mealy a sad excuse of a reward called " SEE IM RIGHT! "
In general, Women are told they deserve the world, but still suffer tons of unhealthy expectations! an important detail, but generally speaking they are enough. They have inherit value while a man is often told he is nothing, and to fulfill his dreams he must work hard and achieve the impossible many times over. Sounds fair? probably not at first glance!
Looking deeper into it. While a man is born with little inherit value, he could potentially rise to the top of the mountain. His results and success is long-term and snowballing. He could be 60 years old but if hes dominant, confident, highly successful and very resourceful then he will be desired until his last day.
All things being equal, in the end it’s fair. Again just to reiterate this example, which is general and by no means applies to each and everyone. A woman is given a ton of gold at birth, while a man is given cheap stock which could theoretically obtain hundreds of tons of gold.
Now to the meat and bones of this topic. I will talk about 4 general types of men when it comes to women, using them in an example in a first date and somewhat longterm
Type 1 The weak & desperate man! In a date: He’s sitting next to a beautiful girl who he feels lucky to simply be in her presens. On the inside he knows he’s unworthy, regardless of its true or not, and tries to win her over by any means. He places her on a pedestal and is therefor below her
She shit-tests him and he feels sad, plays dumb or simply ignores it. She either feels sorry for him or gets frustrated… Either way he’s done without knowing it. He will most likely be used for dates, dinners and acts of service…
Long term: he will most likely stay single settling for scraps of attention and affection. At worst he will drop her off after spending tons of money while another guys who simply DMs her " wyd " get’s to sleep with her without wasting a penny or effort. At best he might get into a relationship where it’s all about her becoming an unsatisfied doormat who knows no better.
Type 2 The average guy! In a date: This is your average guy with some experience. His game will depend on how well he is doing in life and how hot the girl is. The hotter she is, the weaker his game is due to some desperation. She shit tests him and he responds aggressively or by reacting emotionally! His response is better than the first guy and she may respect him a little but it’s not much. She knows he reacts emotionally to her, that she has power over him and that makes him unreliable.
Long term: This is too broad to even begin to attempt describe. So insert your own or your friends situation here
Type 3 The strong, assertive yet good at heart guy! In a date: This guy is the ideal man theoretically speaking. He has the guts, experience and a conscious. When he is shit tested he simply responds to the disrespect with humor, or casual yet firm expression letting her know that she should not repeat her mistake without taking it personally. He makes sure she understands why it’s not ok and gets a confirmation from her. After that he moves on with the conversation because he has no has proved his point, most importantly his intentions clearly demonstrate to her that his boundaries will not be overstepped and if she was to repeat it, there will be consequences in the form denying her his time and attention. She will most likely have greater respect and attraction towards him and would feel that this man can be trusted which allows her to feel safe and secure emotionally.
Longterm: This man will be compared to 4th type of man, the bad, a lot which will allow me to convey what I’ve learned. This man will most likely receive a strong love and fierce loyalty from the woman. Her rules for the weak man and the average man will not apply to him. He will be her full priority and she will desire him to no end on one condition and that is for him to remain consistent
This is where the man will be truly tested. Not by a mere shit test or by the frustrations the earlier types deal with. No, he will be tested by something far worse. The need to be vulnerable. His woman will tell him that he can be soft, he could cry, he could " relax " etc but what she is saying and what he is hearing are 2 different things!
What he is hearing: You have won my love forever! I will treat you exactly the same as now at the added bonus of allowing you the freedom to be vulnerable and weak. You finally got what you have always wished for! Unconditional love! I will not respect you any less, i will not love you any less and i wont reduce the force of my feminine care and affection. The proof is seeing and experiencing the amazing treatment I’ve given you so far which will never change!
What she is saying: Unlike the type 1 and 2 men who submit to me, you are not! And i will test to see if you are like them! I will do any and everything it takes for you to open up fully to me! I will keep doing it again and again for as long as it takes, denying any and all other suiters until i have you wrapped around my finger. I might even get frustrated and gaslight you into thinking that you are denying us something great that could improve our relationships and i will say it with full convition… At the moment But if you do! At first i will reward you heavily for it! Once you do it once its game over, you are mine and my ego is sated… If my self esteem is high and my mental health is stable then i wont lose attraction nor respect for you
But if i have a low self esteem or I’m mentally unstable, then i will punish you for not remaining consistent and strong by reducing the full force of my love and passion ever so slightly, it will be so seamless you will feel like you are losing what you had at first, and losing me in the end like a frog slowly boiling in hot water… If you are unable to get your shit together, then you will become the type 2 man or worse the type 1 man and will be treated no differently.
Finally we get to Type 4, The bad boy! In a date the bad boy is very similar to type 3. The only difference is that he focuses more on fun and intensity. He gets no less attraction than than type 3. When shit tested, he responds just like type 3 etc
- By bad boy i don’t mean a guy who is simply dates girls short term. I mean the liar, cheater, manipulator and the narcist
Longterm: The bad boy breaks all the rules bad term. He is inconsistent, highly emotional, manipulative and selfish. However this is what frustrated me personally to no end. When type 3 shows vulnerability he is punished for it. However the bad boy is Rewarded for a reason i could not understand and deemed unfair! The bad boy proudly shows his immaturity, weakness and deep seated vulnerabilities but for some reason most women love him more for it. He is the only type that get unfairly rewarded for his weakness and selfishness. Not only that but he gets the women addicted to him and in some cases even breaks them where after a long time they become unrecognizable and unable to live without him
His highs and lows, hot and cold, the good and bad keeps the woman in a never ending roller coaster of intensity. He gives her the luxury to hate and love him extremely meanwhile avoiding to look in the mirror addressing her own issues and faults. Fixing and changing him becomes his life long mission which is far easier and more enjoyable compared to working hard on themselves…
In most cases the only leaves him when
A: when the pain gets too much
B: The finally realizes she is unable to change him and walks away not because she wants to, but because she has. Often deluding herself into believing she is " settling " for a good man while making him pay for the bad boys mistake. She might cheat on her new man, leave him due to boredom or worse still be with him while secretly fantasizing about the bad boy
C: The finally realizes she is unable to change him /The pain becomes too much and walks away growing from the experience and finding out the pointlessness of such men. Not only is she fully done with that type of man, but she will whole heartily embrace a different man with no less love and affection.
Now here is what frustrated me. Why women reward the bad boy for his weakness, outburst and unwillingness to change while punishing the good man who showed weakness, apologized and vowed to improve even if he made the same mistake few times. I realized that the difference is simple. The bad boy simply gives no fucks, he lies and promises change with no intention on keeping that promise… In a way he is consistent despite it being bad for her, she reward his consistency
The good man is punished if he is unable to get back up and change because he strayed from the perfection he made her get used to. If if he takes too long then he is truly inconsistent and is therefore punished despite his genuine and honorable efforts.
This is the simply " why " which I’ve figured out which at first made me no less frustrated. It felt as if women were saying " I will happily reward the selfish and hurtful as long they are able to convince me to forgive them. No, i will love them even harder because it means i get to focus on changing them instead of me ".
As the type 3 man. I hated this! I believed that i should be getting the same consideration and benefit of the doubt freely given to the bad boy! Why? Because i have it in me. I can also lie, i can cheat, i can hurt, i can do all those bad things… I am still human with equal good and evil, yet i choose good to the best of my ability. I choose the hard path because it’s the right thing to do. Yet i am expected to remain consistent and unshaking. Yet the bad boy gets to be as unstable and chaotic as he pleases and he only gets more love for it!
And now for the conclusion! I no longer have any frustrations about such things. I choose the hard road because i can sleep with peace. I am grateful for my awareness and conscious despite it depriving me the certain luxuries the bad boy is afforded. Because being type 3 is far better than being the bad boy for many reasons
1: The bad boy needs always lie and jump through hoops after each time he hurts the woman, despite being rewarded for it. I need no such things, all i need is to remain consistent!
2: The bad boy is flawed at his core and while he is afforded certain luxuries, the cons far outweigh the pros
3: The bad boy is limited to his " prey " who fall for his tricks, which are sadly a very large amount, but not all. His options are plenty but ultimately limited
4: While true unconditional love might be impossible, the bad boy exploits the faulty human nature which rewards him for his selfishness. Whatever love i can get as type 3, it’s infinitely healthier than the love he gets even if its less intense.
5: Despite the bad boys selfishness, somewhere deep down his conscious is haunting him. That’s a fate i need never endure
6: Lastly, and most importantly, i need not be the bad boy to learn a thing or two from him. The biggest issue with Type 3 is believing he needs not remain consistent. Other than that, if type 3 does slip up, he needs only to change his approach! He should NOT claim perfection by any means. He could own his shortcomings like the bad boy without needing to make any grand promises. He needs only reject perfection while striving to be better without setting insane expectations for himself.
So to wrap it up. Nobody has it better than the other really. Each of the 4 types relationship wise have their own unique cons and pros. How could type 1 the weak man have pros you ask? Well he has the luxury of not working hard on himself, to not face failure, rejection and the pressure to grow etc… It’s a pro by definition but the cons are far worse long term nobody could see it as pros.
EDIT: My message to my older self! You are a good and strong man with a healthy conscious! The pressure of remaining on top of your game is healthy and important! However you MUST embrace your flaws as well and do not treat them like the end of the world! Perfection is your enemy, Instead of hating the bad boy or being frustrated by the women who reward them. Learn a thing from the bad boy! He embraces his flaws, vulnerability and inability to not be on top. Unlike him, you need not justify those flaws and moments of weakness. By resisting them as hard as you have, YOU set yourself up to failure by projecting a perfect self into the women you are interested in. If you promise absolute perfection then it will be expected, you need not be perfect and embracing your flaws does not mean justifying them or becoming a selfish prick who abuses others.
Week 1/3 , 3rd Cycle
Mon: Khan ST1 + EoG ST1, 4 Min
Wed: Khan ST1 + EoG ST1, 4 Min
Fri: Khan ST1 + EoG ST1, 4 Min
Starting 4 min strong with the 3rd and last cycle for this journey. This washout has been rough on all accounts. For some reason i began needing 2 to 3 hours to fall asleep despite no changes to any consumptions or routine which lead to staying up late instead of struggling to fall asleep for 3 hours which in turn got me sleeping & waking up late just like my old habits. Took few days to correct it but everything is now back on track. Moreover i’ve felt tired, had consistent headaches and very lethargic for no reason.
Negative thoughts like how I’m losing my win streak, my momentum or that my attempts are fruitless and i will end up just like i used to haunted me. Unlike at anytime in my life, i had no power over them yet i did not resist or bargain with them. I simply observed and stayed neutral. It felt like after winning the mental battle, the old went somewhere else. It went to the body and both tried their hardest to push me off my path. However the hardest part was over long ago, this is a cakewalk in comparison.
It feels like im done with Khan Stage 1 Total Breakdown for now. There isn’t much happening anymore on the surface. At most i would get weird dreams of reconciling with my significant exes, enjoying the moment and making peace without attachment. This in turn lead to thinking about them being pleasant but without a need or attachment. No hate and no love. Just appreciation. More could be happening which i am unaware of. I feel like I’m in a weird limbo like state. Like someone standing awkwardly naked after taking off an old suit without what to wear next or how to act while in this state. It’s not bad, it’s just… something. It’s almost like watching a cashier struggle scanning an item you want to purchase and you are just standing there.
While i feel like im done with Total Breakdown, i will finish this like i said i would. I feel comfortable saying and doing that! Matter of fact, i wouldn’t want it any other way
Been getting this feeling for a while. That Total Breakdown is done for now. There is nothing more coming up, no ups no downs and it’s been like like this since 2nd washout. I did feel exhausted and foggy but still clear emotionally. However it could also be a clever way for my mind to sub hop but i am in no rush
NSE has been guiding me towards 2 different paths in the future. The first path is running Khan Stage 2 & Limitless. Those 2 i could run for another 3 cycles and would do me great favor. They align greatly with my original goals and would pick up after this run. Why not continue EoG Stage 1 or jump to Stage 2? Because I’m in no position to cash in on them at the moment! Running either after this would be great but not as beneficial as the alternative
Now the second path NSE started pulling me into is Revelation of Spirit & Love Bomb. It started this week where i’ve stubbled upon Carl Jung and the Shadow. To begin with I’ve had a skewed view spirituality and healing stuff like that due to most people on about it being spiritual narcissists whom replaced ego spirituality and " being divine " of sorts as a new ego to sate narcissism which is derived from rejecting it. Those who act and talk spiritual is their whole personality " peace and love " types. I can always see through peoples BS and self delusion but i was not so different either albeit in a different way. But those polluting and grifting on and with the spiritual wisdom do not take away from it. It could be that the NSE from Total Breakdown is pushing me towards deeper actualization and individuation since it’s job is done through RoS and LB.
No need to make a decision right now. I am in no rush. But i see great potential in both paths. The first path would pick things up and propel me towards great success in many different endeavors. The second, However, could offer hidden gems worth more than any thing i could dream of. In any case, i will stick to either for at least another 3 cycles for the value greatly compounds that way. I considered doing RoS and LB for a cycle and then going back to Khan ST2 and Limitless however one cycle is too short for the quality and amount of value i am after. Then again it could be a great refresher before going back to it.
Shit i don’t know. Only time will tell. For now i finish this cycle according to the plan