Nova Elite: Kether to Malkuth

37 more days and 17 more plays of Dragon Reborn.

Have been getting some potent reminders of just how relevant and salient this program is to my life at this time.

I think I really need it, more than any other program, at the moment.

Anytime that I experience a challenging interpersonal interaction, or a moment of insecurity, or a sense of a lack of clarity regarding my life’s path or my daily activities; it is a reminder of the current salience of Dragon Reborn.

a work in progress

imperfect

doing my best

trying to find my way.

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I’m somewhat internally disoriented at the moment.

Woke up. Did my meditation from 7:30 am to 8:30 am. Mind was kind of internally agitated. Like a lake with choppy waves.

Last night was somewhat similar. At the same time, I finally started cleaning up the apartment. I knew that that was significant.

Things are happening.

I am riding with it.

At first, I found myself getting into that determined march (i.e., suppressed impatience) territory. “Just get to July 11.” That’s the date that my DR4 run is complete.

But I knew that attitude was mistaken. It indicated an excessive focus on the subliminal and an insufficient engagement with my life and my actions.

Ironically and fortuitously, it is precisely that kind of imbalance that Dragon Reborn is ideally suited to address. So, I reflected on it and contemplated it. I processed some things. I tried to set some intentions for how I want to use my time and what I want to do. And I felt shifts happening.

I realized that when I switch to the perspective of what I want to accomplish right now, 5 or 6 weeks is a very short time, and I actually want more time and want to really cherish the time that I have. I found my internal orientation shifting.

It feels like something I’ll need to re-do and repeat consciously during this time.

Okay. I’ll stop here. Just allowing myself to type free-form. And I suspect my next few posts may be in the same vein as well.

Writing from within the change.

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You have an amazing Self - Awareness .

Do you think your long run of QL helped with this ?

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Thanks, brother.

I have a very long way to go.

And I’ m grateful to be here walking the path.

I’m not aware of that specifically. It’s helped with associations and mental connections in general. But as far as self-awareness in particular? I think DR has stimulated more. (This view is subject to change with continued learning.)

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Damn. That’s pretty.

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More subtle practical shifts occurring.

Over the past year, my email inboxes had grown to monstrous proportions.

I just reduced my personal inbox from 1700 e-mails to 314. That last 20 % will require a bit more individual attention, possibly. But it’s not inconceivable that it will be empty by week’s end.

Part 2 will be my work e-mail inbox. (shudder).

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Haha that very well explains my clarity of mind in changing my stack.

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Same with me feeling “emptiness”.

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That emptiness is a space in between what came before and what comes next :pray:

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I’m glad you posted this jewel here and saved me the trouble of copying it back to my journal! :rofl:

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Haha. I was about to post it on Invictus’ journal but fortunately decided otherwise lol.

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Think about this:

At what point in your life did you know enough to be able to say: “I know enough.”

Never happened.

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Actively processing at the moment.

Things are feeling a bit different.

Dragon Reborn Stage 4. 2nd play period. This one ends next week Wednesday 15 June 2022.

Going to do one more after that.

I think during this second play period I’m experiencing more active processing of both of my customs.

Since Dragon Reborn Stage 4 is included as a core in my Drakari custom, I’ve begun playing a loop of straight Dragon Reborn ZP standard as well. That’s got to be adding to the intensity.

Take it as my personal experiment. I feel like I’ve only got a limited time and I want to maximize my Dragon Reborn exposure.

One interesting effect of Dragon Reborn seems to be that it is facilitating enhanced processing of my other modules. I’m just getting a whisper of this effect but I’m noticing it. I think it may bloom and increase even further after I stop playing DR.

I think this DR exposure is both stressing my system and enhancing my system. For the first time since I started running a very heavy stack in summer 2020, I’m noticing what feels like a gradual increase in mental bandwidth.

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Interesting enhanced effects:

Last night I fell asleep in under 2 minutes. (I know because I was listening to some audio and I could reference my last remembered content.). This is highly unusual for me.

Today, I began experiencing a general, decontextualized feeling of joy and wellbeing. It was subtle, not intense. But it lingered and remained for quite some time.

Yesterday, I got the feeling to go and look through audiobooks for possible interesting ones. Over the last two years, I experienced a marked decrease in interest in this. It’s still not high now, but it was interesting to note the increase.

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Meetings today from 10:30 AM straight to 4 PM. Just finished the last one. So it was an impromptu fast.

Funny how going through a fast can change your whole understanding of the significance of food intake.

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One week away from completing my 2nd play period with Dragon Reborn Stage 4.

I’m definitely feeling a bit like one of those werewolves who needs to be shackled in place to ensure that they don’t harm anyone during the full moon.

image

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This music came to me tonight.

And, with it, came these lines to my mind:

“You petition him in your august halls and grand palaces. And, I…? I seek my lord in the craggy peaks and shaded forests. He wanders there, aye; and holds court among the skulls and the thorns.

And If the stars shine on you, pray he grants you audience; and pray, yet more, that you survive.”

And so, here’s to Grimnir.

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(may fix the levels later)

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Oops. Didn’t respond to this one at the time.

But the truth is, I don’t know.

Ascension Chamber is specifically created to facilitate manifestation. How does it do that? I don’t know.

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It was difficult for me, as a young man, to be confident and to feel confident about myself.

But it was always about just recognizing and appreciating who you are.

It requires no justification.

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Felt pretty ungrounded yesterday and then found that (last night) I was not falling asleep for many hours. I wonder if it was related to my mind processing a lot of subliminal input. Not sure. Yesterday was not a listening day. And I didn’t have much trouble falling asleep the night before (which had been a listening day). Then again, that framing of things is pretty artificial. There’s no rule that says subliminal processing is linear.

This morning I, nevertheless, meditated with my stack as I had scheduled to do. The meditation session felt pretty smooth and good. As sometimes happens, I got up from the meditation cushion with a sense of pleasant stimulation that lingered for a while. For me, it’s a subtle sensation.

In the past month, I’ve noticed an increased tendency to ‘forget’ about the subliminals. I want to let them run in the background, and to be more focused on my daily projects. I found that happening a bit more.

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