Need Direction/Advice on Life (Maybe subs too?)

Questions and Comments
#1

I started sub-club with AM due to recommendation from @pacman @RVconsultant @ichigo

The thing is, I’m very confused about where I want to go in life.

Where and how imma make money?

I’ve read when u use AM with a goal; it works better. Right now. I have no goal. What to do?

Feeling lost.

I had a small chat with a college friend who started a job last year.

He said whatever you learn, go deep as fuck else the industry doesn’t treat you very good.
I’m feeling sad and insecure since I read that.

It caused me to ask some damming questions.

Why am I using sub-club, really? Why do I use any subs, really? For pussy?
That’s an answer that keeps coming up. It’s the only thing missing from my life right now. It is exactly as pathetic as it sounds.

Is that all I am? An animal? Slave to my most basic primal urges? Fuck.
You want things you currently don’t have.

My life is quite comfortable right now.
Comfortable at home. I can eat and drink whatever I want. Sleep and wake whenever I want.
My sleep schedule has been fucked for more than a week. I’m writing this at 7 30 AM right now.
Haven’t slept all night. Thank you Netflix.

I’m a spoiled brat. I always got all the material things I wanted.

I never really really struggled for anything.

I’m getting a patent filed on a device my and my friend invented in college. I worked hard on that, but I don’t think i struggled. It’s my life’s 2nd biggest achievement. The first one is getting in that damm college itself. I studied 12-15 hours a day to crack that exam to get into that college. I’ve never struggled. It was a fuckload of work, but I won’t say that I’ve struggled.

Maybe I’m telling you this to reassure myself that I am worth something. That the future will be alright even if I am confused right now.

Due to this lack of struggle in my life, I don’t value anything. What a horrible existence!

Maybe I do value somethings and will only know after I’ve lost them.

Sorry for this rant.

I don’t know why I’m fiddling with subs.
After reading all these success stories, do I really still believe these things will work for me too?

Why do I read so many success stories? To reassure me I’m not wasting time listening to these things? That they really work?

These might be ramblings of a sleep deprived mind.

If you have anything to add, please do.

Just thought something… does this sound like reconciliation again?

EDIT1: I feel like I need a deep fucking emotional cleaning. That I’ve held a lot inside.

Throughtout my life (23 yo) I have been emotionally vulnerable to absolutely no one.
I have always felt showing weakness will drive people away. Dont know where this idea came from.

Even when I try to open up a little to this inventor friend of mine… i am always calculative about opening up. Releasing only limited info to make myself feel that I’m being vulnerable to someone finally.

I hate living this lie. God help me

EDIT: I also need to stop this fucking porn habit. I watch at night simply coz “its the thing to do.” I wasn’t even horny. Pathetic. I don’t want to view women like that. It sucks. There was an 18 yo girl I saw yesterday filming for the first time. She was so cute and innocent. She wasn’t a virgin but she did lost her innocent that day while filming. She helpless and shaken. She could barely take it. Fuck god. She’s somebody’s daughter. Somebody’s sister. Only 18. What the fuck do 18 yos know? She prolly just needed money for rent and food. Preying on such people is pure evil. This is not me god please no. I’m tearing up like a little bitch typing this. My sister is sleeping beside me taking a break from office. She didn’t get enough sleep at night.

What kind of scumbag father am I gonna be jerking off to other men’s exploited daughters?
Makes me wanna blow my brain literally.

No point waiting for anti porn script of AM to kick in. I gotta do it consciously. This is poison. Fuck god.
I hope something good is coming from this mental suffering right now. I hope I fall asleep soon. Gonna hug my mom. Thank her and sleep I think.

EDIT: Btw, i’ll add that I got placed from campus into the 3rd biggest tech company of my country as a software engineer. Will start the job in July.

My OP may have given the impression that I have no job, living at home type stuff.

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Quest of being my Ideal Self [Ascended Mogul + Khan + PS]
#2

Yeah. Your purpose is to worship God Alone, that’s why He created you and, feeds you.

Everything else is enjoyment.
When the heart does not remember its Creator, it becomes agonized.

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#3

Sometimes the answers to your questions are within you. You have to introspect deeply.

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#4

There is wisdom in this but it’s not the truth. It just paralyzed you into not making a choice on direction.

Any direction you go is better then none because you can learn, and further clarify your path/purpose/goals much easier in doing and action-not in figuring it out.

It’s great to have that as an option to do, but obviously that’s not fulfilling to you.

that is quite an achievement if it set you up to not have to work for a while-life, and you still have the rest of your life to live …so here we are :slight_smile:

you are worth something (intrinsically even if your struggling with seeing that now )and the future will be alright even if your confused now–your confused because your a. evolving b. willing to want and look for something more-otherwise you’d be crystal clear and content with netflix and kicking back

there not magic for everyone-some people they are though ;)- but once you find your right fit and speed, they will work for you- the really kick in when your in action on the subs intended goals, and your consistent 3+ months with one sub

likely you got really hurt/betrayed when you opened up or were vulnerable in your earlier/young life - it sounds hard for you to trust yourself and other people -it’s just defense some people have -I have/had a ton of it- it makes life much less fun and interesting when it’s there, more like a battleground.

Dude, you had some success and now you don’t know what’s next, that’s cool! I promise in a couple hours it won’t seem as catastrophic.

As for both that and subs -this is what I could ask yourself- if you could wake up tomorrow and 1 thing would be different about your life and you’d be crazy ecstatic about it- what would it be (you can be unrealistic but not supernatural so billionaire or playboy, is cool-super strength wouldn’t fly lol)

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#5

If that’s what you don’t have in life, there’s nothing wrong with acknowledging your primal urges and even satisfying them. That doesn’t make you a slave to them unless it gets out of hand. Your urges are normal and natural.

Yup.

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#6

It appears it’s time for you to do a lot of inner work. I highly recommend going through all stages of Dragon Reborn sooner than later! With the new update for it coming out soon, you will find your true self.

This says it all.

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#7

I dont have money for DR right now… I bought some subs in excitement

I have rebirth, khan, regeneration and some other stuff

#8

I misread your post, you’re goal is to make money and find the way to do that and your looking to see which subs will help?

#9

The best thing ever said to me was by a life coach. She told me after I had poured out that I felt unworthy. She said with emphasis “(My name) you are worthy. There is nothing you need to do or to be.” You are worthy. It is the most important thing I have ever been told. It wasn’t earth shattering or changed my life. But it has stuck with me. In the darkest pits of hell, I am learning to embrace that I am worthy.

@David you are worthy. There is nothing you can do or not do to be more worthy. You are worthy of the greatest highest life.

My inner work has taught me to embrace the pain. Accept it. Its sounds like a yogi bullshit but its true. Tell the pain to come at you. Let it know you can take more pain. Embrace it. Wear it as armor. Once you have embraced it it will dissipate. Your trapped emotions want to be felt. Don’t run away from them. Not easy to do, not life changing, but necessary.

On subs, run a stack or one sub for a year. Trust the process. It will work itself out. Embrace the pain that comes with them. Take action on your goals. Run only sub club subs. They work. Remember to take rest days. Journal your journey.

Remember you are worthy.

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#10

Maybe something like Rebirth or Regeneration will help. I got loads of emotional healing thanks to Elixir + Regeneration. Maybe you could combine Regeneration with Ascended Mogul to help with clearing out all what you are experiencing. Or even try Khan ST1 for a month (which I admit will be rough)

In your present condition though, continuing AM might be best. It is possible that AM by itself is digging all these issues out and making you ask difficult questions to yourself

Which is a good thing (although it doesn’t feel good)

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#11

@David - and one more thing, my friend. It is perfectly okay to feel sexually attracted to young women. You may have sex with them or look at them if they are over the age of consent. Don’t give into the self-shame. When you accept that your sexual desire is perfectly normal, you will feel less guilt over it. The world has told you to not think of sex but brought you into the world with the same tool (sex).

Sex is a very basic drive just as the need for food and shelter. Tell yourself, it is okay. We are all telling you, it is okay and you will be okay

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#12

That is some read.

I’d say if your life is as comfortable as you say it is, maybe you’re not challenging yourself to the point where the sub kicks in. I’d also say you may be in a place where you have the luxury to run a few healing subs first, maybe talk to somebody about what you’re feeling since I’m getting a bit of a vibe that you’re mentally in a bad place.

As far as the porn stuff goes… the average age of teen actors in Disney movies is 24. So is the age of the average 18 year old in porn. :slight_smile:

Honestly, the amount of young girls that end up behind a camera nowadays is astonishing. It used to be that we as men would wonder how many men she’d been with before us. Nowadays I wonder if she’s ever done camming and if it was a solo-act.

Like a bride wearing white on her wedding, they are rarely as innocent as they look.

SubClub subs should eventually make you lose interest in porn. You’ll end up watching things like SexArt that is more about creating an experience. And that is if you feel like watching at all.

You could accelerate it by watching VR porn, then breaking your VR headset. Once you’ve seen VR porn, 2D porn loses its appeal. Combine it with funscripts and real women lose their appeal. It’s a fragile balance. :slight_smile:

@Lion I have a theory that as men we all walk the same path of what we are attracted to, which evolves as we experience it. So a man that never “got lucky” in high school and college will continue to be attracted to younger women until he’s experienced a few, then he will lose that attraction and become attracted to women in their late 20’s early 30’s and so on. We mature with experience. Unfortunately a lot of men never got lucky in high school. Fortunately 99.999% of them have the willpower not to seek out that experience once they are over 20.

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#13

@David speaking of what @Lion was saying, I don’t know if you’ve ever read much myth or legend, but in ancient Egypt the first born god Atum creates the universe and all the creatures by masturbating them into being. As Wikipedia puts it: " with the hand he used in this act representing the female principle inherent within him. Yet other interpretations state that he has made union with his shadow."

Think about that. Making love to his own shadow nature to create the world. In every creative act there’s a sexual element, creatively finding ways not to see your own brilliance is no exception. Here’s an NLP idea. Next time you’re having a dark night of the soul, see your shadow as a potential suitor that’s coming on a little too strong and find ways to playfully neg her. What kind of comebacks would you give to your shadow if they were a real person? :wink:

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#14

It’s possible. But my theory is that men of all ages are biologically more attracted to women who exhibit markers of fertility which comes with youth. That’s why women between the age of 18 and 23 are considered most attractive because that is their peak in terms of biological attractiveness

Personally though, I do feel attracted to women of all ages who have a “golden ratio hourglass” figure regardless of their age. And I got the hots for legs too lol

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#15

I’m a face-person myself. But athletic figure is a must.

I actually learned from a stripper that when she was on the pill she got less tips, presumably because the pill causes the body to sent out pheromones that indicate pregnancy and thus an inability to procreate. When she wasn’t taking them, she was much more popular. It’s scary how influenced we are by our biological impulses without realizing it.

One problem we have nowadays is that those fertility markers (possibly due to processed nutrition or other environmental factors) are starting at an ever younger age. A human female’s body starts creating eggs and throwing out pheromones that men are biologically attracted to around the age of 12. I knew a girl of that age that needed an operation to make her breasts smaller because the weight was ruining her spinal development. She got her period at 10. When I was in high school I knew a 14 year old girl who’d lost her virginity at 12. And she actually still looked like a 14 year old. Mentally she was no way developed enough and I spent a lot of time sheltering her from the world because she was drawing boys in like flies. Biologically it’s completely messed up.

Anyway, I’m pretty sure David didn’t mean for people to start an academic dialogue about sex and porn. :slight_smile:

PS Is it just me or do Gal Gadot’s legs go on forever? :wink:

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#16

True. A large part of society is oblivious to this

Again, another issue but this one being a bit more well known. Unfortunately, nothing’s really been done about it especially with how easy it is to get junk food and birth control pills. Add to this the drop in testosterone for men due to the same reasons and we got quite scenario on our hands.

She’s hot but am more for the curvier type. Like Isla Fisher and Amy Adams (who at first I thought were the same person :smiley: )

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#17

Yes.

What that man wrote.

I was just saying the other day:

Trying to use Reason to control emotions is not very Reasonable.

Use Reason and observation to explore and understand your feelings. And then also use reason to identify methods that can actually impact your feelings and experience effectively. (For that second part, reason itself may not actually end up that high on the list.)

Another wise thing I’ve heard is “Take your path seriously, but do not take yourself so seriously”.

We’re locked up in rooms too much and we forget that we are small as fuck in an extremely vast Cosmos. People actually need experiences that remind us of this on a regular basis. Awe-inspiring experiences.

Gives the old nervous system and hormones a nice reset from time to time.

Your passion and your agony came through in that post. Life can feel like that sometimes. The mind can get like that sometimes.

Might seem impossible to believe, but the same power that is fueling that passion and agony (Pagony? sorry) is precisely the same inner resource that is one of your greatest treasures. Like a bucking bronco named Rocket. It’s kind of manhandling you and throwing you all over right now. (‘AAAGGHHHH!!! I’ve just had an epiphany! I’m a piece of SHIIIIIIIT!’) Most honest people will admit that they’ve been there before. Probably will be there again.

But yes, that passion and that intensity are EXACTLY the same thing that will be fueling your successful life journey. That bucking bronco will eventually be your best friend who will carry you as you streak around the landscape of life.

Don’t curse yourself for having happiness or privilege. The more happy people there are in the world, the more freaking happiness there is in the world! :slight_smile: Your misery would not make anything better.

Instead, be thankful for your life, and keep on evolving. Spoiler alert: whether you appreciate it or completely deny its value, this shit more or less ends the same way:

‘Exhale’.

So, my vote’s for appreciating it. :wink:

Oh, one other thing: hahaha.

You were probably experiencing Reconciliation as you wrote this. This is often exactly what it feels like.

Respect, man. :peace_symbol: Solidarity.

You’re good.

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#18

Surprise! That’s the healing module.

Bruh, Ascended Mogul is working on you and you don’t even realise it :smiley:

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#19

“Man is what he believes.”

Read that again.
And again.

Seriously. Read and UNDERSTAND it.

I have been in your place. And I’m just gonna link the post I gave another member in here:

What you are searching is purpose.
Meaning in your life.

The great thing about our current time is (but also the tough thing) that you can CHOOSE your purpose.

Men of the past couldn’t. They were born into it.

That meant they were given a meaning, but it also meant if they didn’t like it, too bad.

Do you not SEE the GREATNESS of being ABLE to choose your own purpose, meaning, and success in life?

There is a system I developed with which you can find your purpose. I usually charge for that, but since I resonate with your message, DM me and I’ll give you free access (if you’re interested).

You can also try to find it yourself, no pressure.
Don’t wanna give off the vibe that I am trying to sell stuff here.

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#20

I think part of the beauty of QV2 as it’s being demonstrated is this focus on manifesting results, because results are what feed into motivation to keep the cycle of using the programs running. The reason people usually hop subs is usually because they’re not getting results but getting plenty of reconciliation, and the frustration of the apparent stagnation causes a loss of confidence in the process.

Seeing the results quicker also helps people who are unsure on purpose see whether the path the results take them down is in alignment with their purpose or whether they need a different set of tools. So with a quicker feedback loop purpose can be clarified without going through as much trial and error.

I know I’m excited to see what ones aligned with my purpose can do in opening up pathways to manifestation, like Alchemist or QLQ.

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