My Journey to Olympus

[Apollo]

Rest: Day 3

Made a custom from two ZP titles I’ve liked the results the most, Khan and Chosen. On one hand I am keen to run the new version of Emperor but running it with this heavy custom is probably not a good idea at this time.

Along with Wanted, AM is on standby as my third title in case I feel it’s prudent and if could handle it.

P.S.
I liked my initial impression of the new Emperor version. There’s a noticeable increase in attraction, however my temper was quicker.

Could be stress, recon or Emperor’s familiar low tolerance for the unpleasant is showing up, which I like. My initial impression is that this Emperor is more assertive.

[TheDerpinator]

@Apollo

I wish to be very good in conversations, comfortable and excellent socially but at heart I’m a very private, introverted person and maybe the fame part and high approachability is what’s causing my reconciliation.

You ever thought of just running either primal or daredevil instead to really focus on this aspect first before upgrading to stark? Note though being private and introverted isnt necessairly opposed to any of these titles, you can be socially fun yet private and introverted at the same time. If anything that causes even more intrigue in others. You do ofcourse have to be okay with the attention though.

[Apollo]

Indeed. I enjoy Primal, and had some of the best times I’ve had on SC sub on PS. No overthinking, comfortable with myself, social and confident and I felt like a hunter again.

I like celebrations and can be a social butterfly when I’m in the mood, but that mood does not come as often as I’d like.

I guess what Chosen, Primal, PS or Khan’s effect on my psyche is to be genuinely okay with that, and that helps my sociability.

As for Q and ZPv1 versions of Stark, I’m not sure. I wish I gelled well with it, I feel I’m luckier when I’m on Stark.

[Apollo]

Supposed to start today, but I’m waiting a little bit in case the ZPv1 320 version of Wanted becomes available so I can test it fresh. That said, I’m not in any rush, I’m even thinking of extending my rest days until Monday. In case it isn’t here yet, I’ll simply log when I make the switch to the latest version.

Another thought. I’m tempted to run the new version of Stark and see if the new update is the key for me to truly enjoy Stark, but I think it’s best to test the new custom first when it arrives before anything else so I can gauge it’s effects more accurately.

As of things around me, there are good news trickling in and I feel pretty good today. Not sure if my last run of the new version of Emperor and first version of CWON had something to do with it, but reading other reviews and comparing with what I’m currently experiencing, it certainly feels like it. Things are flowing much better in the past few days and my thoughts are clearer.

[Apollo]

9th Cycle, Day 1: Khan-Chosen custom ZPv1

My custom has arrived. I’m very excited and optimistic.

I’ll be running only this title today, and maybe Wanted, depending on how I feel later in the day.

Back on the journey to Olympus.

[Apollo]

Rest

Had a message earlier but I kept my composure and instinctively reframed the situation into something more positive and something I can influence within my current ability.

I’m pleased with the way I handled that, and something tells me it’s mainly the Chosen core that guided me in the way I thought, my demeanor and in regaining my balance.

I have been reading various reviews here on the forums and the recent updates and breakthroughs are ramping up my excitement for things to come. SC is definitely amping up the game.

[Apollo]

Addendum:

I’m tempted to run CWoN as my third title. I’m not around nature much, and I don’t even have a garden in my current location but something about this title is so appealing and the reviews are excellent.

[Apollo]

10 Cycle: Khan ST4 ZPv1 320, True Sell ZPv1 320

Day 1:

I had to cut my other cycle a bit shorter due to experimenting a bit and avoiding recon. I was originally going to run Chosen with Khan for this cycle, but then I have to try how True Sell mingles with my personality and how it improves my social ability, my wit, charm and quick thinking.

I tend to overthink, I’d rather I spend that thinking bandwidth into something more productive rather than worrying scenarios and stresses.

I credit this to CWoN; I’m currently in the beginning stages of something that might change my life and my reality exponentially for the better, and I’m going to need tools for the job, however life goes on before that I still need to function in my best form. Those close to me depends on me and I have to always keep that in mind.

I like the way I felt on Emperor but I noticed I wasn’t as social than when I was on Khan. Perhaps if I have given it more cycles it will mellow out and I’ll find my groove. Then again I’ve always had the best time on Emperor while running PS on the side, hence Khan.

Emperor and Khan… hmm what a choice. Both will make one legendary.

I’m back on the drawing board with customs, I have to reflect and truly find what I need.

I like Potentiator and wealth modules, so I’ll probably have that revolved around wealth and productivity and run Wanted on the side to look my best.

It’s tricky because there’s so many things I want, but I understand, the secret to success with subs is deciding what matters the most and sticking with it through thick and thin.

I have to keep pummeling that to my mind whenever the indecision hydra rears her heads.

[Apollo]

Day 1: Addendum

Oh what a lovely day. I know it will take a while before Khan and True Sell comes fully online for me but I’ve had glimpses of the possibilities today and it’s filled me with joy and excitement.

I was very productive and was able to do a lot today and most, if not all of them are a resounding success. The day was busy and yet there’s a sort of effortlessness to it.

I like it when life is like that. Smooth, productive, pleasant and worthwhile.

I missed this Khan feeling, the swagger, the confidence, the primal desire which fills me with much passion for life and living, and add to that the deep knowing that everything’s going to be okay, it’s all taken care of.

I just know those sparks of desire and passion will eventually become a burning flame of ambition and a desire to succeed and excel. It’s not over yet for ol’ Apollo.

On attraction, aside from the others, there’s this one woman that was giving my some pretty unusual IOI’s… in any case as always it’s very flattering. I like it.

When I got home to rest and mellow out, I had to listen to music and I was singing again, it’s been a while since I felt so carefree and just immersing myself without much care or worry.

Not that I am being careless or forgetting what I’m supposed to do, but thinking about what I want to achieve in my life shouldn’t fill me with pain, fear or regret, I do not respond to that. I shut down and become pessimistic.

This is probably why I like Chosen, because it filled me with positivity and not lack or despair. I was productive on that one. I just move into action. The overthinking and pessimism bogs me down. It’s a different kind of gasoline that works well for my engine.

What else… hmm I’ve had some questions answered by SC customer service today and what a superb reply. I’m tempted to respond just to thank them for that but I didn’t wish to open a ticket and add to the many messages they are responding to. It will just be a hassle for them but nevertheless I am thankful, and the person who answered is fantastic.

I’d include the answer to the mega thread here but I’m not sure if it will be useful as it’s about my custom.

I had to write this on my journal to remind me of days like this, and to look forward to a new, and elevated baseline of my life.

Soon enough I’ll be closer and closer to the mount Olympus of my dreams.

[Apollo]

Day 4 of rest:

Going through some very tough recon. Recon? Or reflection of what’s truly going on. It’s tough when the harshest words and and opinions of you are coming from you.

I’ve reflected on my life, my choices, circumstances both within and beyond my control. The cards aren’t optimal from the very beginning, and my choices and lack of understanding and realization only made it worse.

How do you heal a scar tissue, or transform a vortex? Is there getting back on the horse?

Oftentimes I don’t like to say these things in my public journal, but perhaps it might change my internal alchemy. What’s the difference, I’m my worst judge, jury and hopefully my best liberator.

[RVconsultant]

You got this, man!

Have you ever kept a gratitude journal?

[Apollo]

@RVconsultant Thank you my friend, I appreciate the motivation.

At this point in my life, I should be wiser than this. There is no hiding with ZP, and it’s just the truth.

The subs will help with what I make of these truths. From the ashes, a phoenix can rise. Wrongs can be corrected.

The realizations are painful nonetheless, but there is always something to be grateful for and that remains an empowering companion in this journey. It’s hard to see silver linings while in the thick of it, but it’s there.

[Apollo]

Day 7: Rest

I find myself remembering how I was when I was a kid. I remember thinking I’ll never perish, and that I’m indestructible, and I loved life so much that I’ll continue living as if I was immortal.

I miss that feeling. What heights I could reach to have that mindset once again. It’s naïveté and yet it’s probably one of my most empowering thoughts.

I wish to love life as I once did.

[Apollo]

Addendum: A reminder of something I could look back to for inspiration.

Why allow something I couldn’t control get inside my head.

In the past few days I’ve been watching a Netflix documentary, “The last dance”. It’s mainly about the Chicago Bulls and Michael Jordan and their championship.

I remember as I kid, those Jordan shoes were gold, and I couldn’t wait to get into class to show my buddies what I got. They all did too, and those were some good times.

I wasn’t into basketball as much as my friends and yet I knew MJ. Now in adulthood, I understand why I did.

What an amazing athlete and mindset.

If I could program my mind to think that way, and to have that kind drive, that kind of fire, the sky is the limit.

I know I’ll find that flame within. It’s in there, somewhere.

[Apollo]

Addendum:

Took a nap and had a dream within a dream. Perhaps deeper.

I attribute this with QL ST1 or the Deep Sleep module in my custom.

[Apollo]

Day 10: Rest

Going to try a different routine for the remainder of my 11th cycle. M-W-F, one title, one loop per play day. Technically one particular title per week.

Perhaps this would give myself more time to “breath” and integrate. The titles I am currently running are heavy, and one is mainly focused on cognition, productivity, brain and executive function, which goals I partly believe also gave me recon through Stark.

Been going through a very intense recon in the past week or two, probably the most intense I’ve ever experienced, but it also happened I have some big things going in my life and that mix was not pleasant.

It was quite the experience, my mind was throwing so much negativity at me, even when going to sleep, and when I awake, well life is happening and life is not optimal.

It felt like I had nowhere to go and no respite, and that people who are close to me, not only not believe in me, but is actually thinking poorly about me even though I know in my heart I mean well and would want nothing more but a happy and a succesful life for all of us.

I still do, and nothing can change that.

It’s probably recon, yet a benign shadow could look like a phantom for a mind that is afraid.

I feel I need more energy, both physically and mentally, and of course more positivity and optimism, strength of character and not only the desire but the actual will and capability to bend my current reality to what I aspire to and would make me happy in this lifetime.

Chosen is part of my custom, and yet what has truly drawn me to the title is the positive, alpha mindset, and the nice impression I seem to make while on it in my previous runs. I’m not really clamoring to be a source of inspiration or to motivate others.

I know who I am at my core, but to be honest, I am also becoming pessimistic and nihilistic. I wish to stop caring too much.

[Apollo]

Day 16: Emperor, Commander

Inspired by fellow member’s experiments, I think it’s also time for me to experiment on my own and try to find the pattern that would work optimally for me.

I’ll probably let go of my custom at the moment as it might be too heavy and could influence my experimentation. If this is successful, I’ll reincorporate one of my customs again for my 12th cycle.

[Apollo]

Day 17: Rest

Was about to give up on Emperor ZP, and then things turned around today. A massive thorn has been pulled out, and a resolution appeared. The day was perfect, smooth as can be and circumstances simply aligned to get the best possible outcome.

Will stick with Emperor until I feel my heavy stack could accommodate Khan. The other stages are fine, it’s a lot of fun, but ST4 feels different for me.

I also noticed more gossip and a few people close to me openly shown their dislike. Felt like a pariah.

Didn’t see that one coming. Or perhaps I did, but still, I’m a human being, I still feel, and it stings. Not to mention the timing because I was already very low in spirits and my stress level was through the roof.

Salt to the wound indeed.

Even though I thought I’d forego my custom, I had to run it one last time the other day, and there’s just no possible way to explain what transpired today except Way of ROI massively manifested a tremendous outcome, out of nowhere.

It’s been a while, but I can finally sleep tonight, the soundest of sleep. My mind is at peace and my heart is joyful.

As for my relations, I hope lifeblood fable will shine.

What a roller coaster ride. Now to dust myself off and get back on the horse.

I’m thankful to SC for these life changing tools.

[Apollo]

Rest

After spending some time on Emperor, I feel it’s time I resume my adventures with Khan. I couldn’t replicate the feeling, even with an Emperor - Primal custom…

Khan truly is ineffable.

Looking back at my private ZP journal, I’ve had the grandest of time with Khan, Chosen and Wanted, and seeing that I have a Chosen-Wanted custom on standby, QL has free reigns, without having to relinquish one of the triumvirates.

The swagger, the certainty, the courage, the Joie de vivre, opportunities, alpha primal instinct and perhaps even the attraction and the intimate prowess.

I’ll be cutting this cycle short for a washout and resume the ZP stack that has shown me the most obvious results now that the extreme pressures and stresses have passed.

It was a traumatic experience, and one of the worst moments of my life, and right now the alpha title (in my opinion), beckons.

[Apollo]

Day 15

Some thoughts in my mind. Perhaps incoherent and unstructured but I want to read back and to truly see what’s going on in my head at these times.

I ran QL ST4 for the first time today. I ran it around an hour or so ago, and right now I’m feeling pretty good. Good enough to push me to write.

Didn’t expect that. I feel a sort of spark in my psyche. Having thoughts of things I previously liked to do but have lost interest in over the years.

It’s a nice feeling, and I want it to get stronger with time.

Perhaps I’m also feeling that Chosen/khan “can do” attitude, which also dulls my tendency to overthink about things that does not serve me well.

If I am to make a new custom with QL in it, I would certainly like to include the module “The Wonder”.

My aim is to regain that feeling of wonder, glory, adventure and the sense of invincibility and possibility in my youth.

Losing this ability is a sin I hope to correct with subliminals on my side.

Stoicism or at least as I understood it, doesn’t appeal to me. I want to feel good about life, to enjoy, to laugh, to care.

Although Aurelius and Augustus is well regarded, I want to see life like Julius Caesar. Adventure, conquest, success, daredevil, masculine. Excess? Maybe slightly.

Hence I why I believe in Khan. I want that dapper social alpha and the ability dominate my life, to be in charge while feeling so good about myself and enjoying what life has to offer.

There are times I wish I was the kind of man that has this linear and solid way of seeing life. To perform well in school, graduate, have a nice stable career and be wealthy and well respected. I admire them, and I envy them.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me, why I wasn’t like this.

My mind wasn’t wired this way. I liked too many things and would rebel against whatever made me feel stifled, and more often than not it was against my own interest.

My own worst enemy is myself and I wish to fix this.

I want to be my best ally, true friend and brother, not my attorney that performs so well when justifying my bad decisions in the courtroom of my mind.

So many opportunities wasted, and I was able to justify it to myself so I didn’t feel too bad.

I payed the price for that.

If only I used that energy for something else.

What a mistake that was. What a crime against myself.

Chosen and Khan helps me see things in a different light. I like the social prowess, daredevil and alpha of Khan, and the courage, responsibility and positivity of Chosen.

On another note, I still think the Chosen line is very special.

I wish there was a “city” version which has wealth, intelligence, success and stronger attraction while maintaining the courage, positivity and respectable aura of Chosen.