Mountain climbs EOG

Journals - Major Programs
#41

think Drld is working on something.

Are my goals consciously not in sync with my subconscious goals? Are my goals that bubble into thought my goals?

I’ve lived in four of the biggest cities in the us.

All four interesting in their own way. Very different from each other. Adventure and beauty everywhere.

Was amazing. If you have the right personality, do it.

I miss my grandparents house out in the woods. They loved in. Grilling, looking at the lake, fishing, shooting guns.

I keep looking at pictures of evergreen trees.

It makes me feel safe to see these pictures. I didn’t realize that was the emotion these pictures raised until recently.

We don’t really have many trees where I live now. A few cherry blossoms. The alley has some. The city talks about planting some.

I find a subway super convenient. But it’s always on. Nature can be relaxing. I don’t spend enough time out of the city. Maybe I want to get out of fight or flight and into I’m going to eat some grilled fish mode.

Haven’t even been to the beach this year or last and family lives out there.

That’s my nostalgic take for today. Trees. If you’ve never been Pennsylvania is beautiful.

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#42

“I haven’t seen you in three years. You’ve changed. what are you doing differently?”

Well, I do x and y and I play subliminals by subliminal club.

Look of confusion. “That doesn’t work. It’s placebo.”

“Who cares how it works, you just said it works.”

“You can’t just play voices under a mucus track and have it change you.” Look of disgust.

—————
Why do people ask? Some people are so afraid of looking foolish they become foolish.

These are successful people, working darn hard. That’s exhausting.

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#43

They are trés idiote. But I also think people ask because deep down they want answers. They’re wanting results.

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#44

Oh man, when you let go of things from the past you really let go out them. More work to do I’m sure.

#45

I have no doubt that my added process releases the fear wealth manifesting modules bring forward.

Having released I have no run rich and it’s bringing more fear forward.

I’m trying to decide if I should sit with it or release it again.

I mean subliminals are cool and all but I’m not really here for the alchemy. I want more money so I have more comfort. And the world is changing. Not because I want to slay dragons that don’t belong to me.

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#46

Incase anyone finds value in my rambling, rich definitely filled me with fear. That’s probably something that was already installed in me and not Rich’s fault. It made me feel like my stomach was tied in knots.

So I used something to release those emotions.

Which ended the knot feelings but I sat for a little while feeling like life is stupid and I don’t want to play these alchemy games. I was very much going down a path of learn to live with your limitations. I don’t own this shit. It’s not my fault I was assigned to whacky people when I got here.

But then I added some self love to the mix and I’m ready to go to battle with the demons again. I mean I don’t really want to but it’s something to do while I wait for the thunder storm.

Stupid demons. I’ll be honest with you. I don’t love it here. It’s basically like a c- planet. But as long as I’m here I’m going to try to make it more comfortable.

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#47

I just heard a talk where Richard himself said what I’m trying to do can work.

I wonder if he’s got any other thoughts on this subject. I know what I’ll be looking into tomorrow.

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#48

Richard who?

#49

Sorry, bandler

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#50

Synchronicity everywhere. Idk what to make of these. I know people talk about them. Let’s see what happens.

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#51

I still don’t know what luck is. I’m pretty sure it’s a natural force. Trying to increase it feels good. In my gut.

It feels correct.

Let’s see what happens.

#52

When I get frustrated that things aren’t happening as quickly as I like I change things. This makes sense to me.

I’m very high on openness to experience and very high on creativity.

I’m exceptionally low in consciousness.

This normally leads to be laughing at myself when I have to go back and remember all of the things I changed and try to figure out which one worked.

I wonder what it would be like to be higher in consciousness. It would probably solve some problems, but it might not be any fun.

Add is awesome!

#53

Throat healing. Throat healing appears to provide positive movement.

I wonder if that’s why nobody believes me about how I ended up here.

#54

I’ve been thinking about my goals. It now seems so obvious to me. I’m going to struggle with my goals until I get my root sorted.

You can’t build a great structure without a solid foundation. That’s why I struggled with stage 1 so much and for so long.

It seems to me, maybe I’m crazy, probably… but it seems to me the answer is in the esoteric.

Open to ideas.

More metaphor.

#55

This is awkward.

Did my subconscious just break my charging cable since I was working on something it doesn’t want me to?

Seriously bro, we’re going to do this and it will be better if we work together.

I’m such an ass.

What am I going to do, sabotage my wireless charger and my laptop?

#56

My desire to not feel like my guts are tied in knots is quickly outgrowing my desire to complete this project.

Not tapping yet but it’s coming.

#57

I’m still thinking sun is important. Just thinking back on when I got excellent results in the circumstances category.

I live in a big, dense city. There are no front yards. Back yards are very very small.

Idk, 15 feet.

I have a big tree. My neighbor has no tree. I should remove that fence.

I need to take this more seriously.

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#58

Something in me really wants me to overexpose. I know better than I do I suppose.

My root pain is largely gone. My solar plexus is unhappy. Some of my abs were locking up. Just observations of how I perceive the world.

#59

And now I’ve learned how to stop the sensation I don’t like. Hopefully back to results.

#60

Heavy wave of nihilism. Dense and heavy. I could try to break the feeling.

Idk was I too injured to take on this project?

I should order a pizza. Pizza is good.

They had a special, pizza with a small side of fries. We will make it through the density!!

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