Medicine, meditation, fitness, business

This comes up in professional exams when doctors grade med students with no joy, endlessly killing the morale on how intelligent they are.
When you start coming up with mindset that my worth as a clinician isn’t about what doc grades you in exams but it’s about the life changing impact you make of patients and how much you helped to ease their pain.
That’s what matters.

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The journey is not funny. Most of my senior colleagues are writing professional exams when their sisters got married or might not even attend their dads burial due to school workload.

Just remember that what matters most in this life is the relationships you had with people not necessarily been intelligent and always busy.
Find time to reach out to your parents and friends hang out with them on weekends.

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That’s what am passing through that lead me to subliminals , I hardly hang out am so socially inapt just to make sure I read I avoid social activities here and there .

Even up till now I haven’t gotten in a serious relationship with the feminine, I always fuck it up with am busy.

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Thank you for your responses brother, you are definitely correct. It can be easy to get caught up in the BS, just need to get through. What year or stage of training are you in? I will check out your journal later. I [email protected]#$ed up with a lot of women in the past but that was just a learning experience that made me more desirable. We’re so busy and that sucks but I hope that things will be better down the line. Usually, all the guys I know that start working suddenly have a lot easier time dating higher quality women and having fun but it isn’t always easy. We’re in the right place!

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Bro don’t hope for something that doesn’t exist start living in the now. Find you interest in medicine start reading old books about it, what those doctors who started that unit believe in . Open a channel online telegram or Twitter and drop contents on how you can fix issues on those areas you picked.

Make problem solving you target now. And grow from it.

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I just finished Preclinicals , about to enter clinicals in the next 3 months.
Currently am preparing for my medical examination 1 to enter into clinical class.


Awesome, best of luck! I hope you do great and entering clinicals may be quite a nice difference from reading and studying in isolation all the time.

For me, I just finished a 9 hr licensing exam yesterday. A big hurdle I was studying hard for the past month. Huge relief that it is behind me. One more exam next week. Took a break today and will start preparing for that tomorrow.

Today, signed up for a new gym membership and did a workout. It’s been a while since I’ve been able to get a strength workout in so am quite weak, but it was really nice to get started again and I am excited. The sales reps were very nice and I got a very good deal, much cheaper than quotes I’ve seen online and elsewhere. I noticed on the contract they listed Amazon, so maybe they gave me a corporate discount or something even though I have no connection to that.

Taking the test took a lot out of me. When I’m in these depleted states, I feel more general anxiety, but went out and had a good day. Been spending a lot of money lately as a gift to myself for finishing that grueling exam (nicer hotel, gym membership, eating out), not that I can really afford it but living it up a little bit.

1 week update w/

"Social ZP"

QLQ4, True Social Core, Organization Perfected, Dragon Tongue, Lifeblood Fable, Lion IV, Joie de Vivre, Perfect Style & Smell, Story Teller, Song of Joy, Carpe Diem Ascended, True Sell, Virtue Series Hope, Way of Understanding, Approachability Aura, Chiron, Polyglot, The Oath, Natural Winner, Gratitude Embodiment.

Overall feel more sociable and that people have been nicer. I feel like I am also nicer to others and smile more often in public. I still feel some anxiety around others sometimes when I am burned out. Other times more confident and witty, particularly last week. Feel like I am getting better at listening when others are venting and being more of a therapeutic communicator. Listening every other day and I look forward to days when I listen as I feel it gives me a boost. I don’t want to enter recon territory though. Subs always seem to give me a huge impact when I first start them, and then the gains are not as noticeable and my enthusiasm kind of fizzles out. Whether this is recon or just my nature Idk but I will continue and consider experimenting with less loops / wk.


Some modules that may be of interest:

You mentioned some features characteristic of Impostor Syndrome. Many people deal with it (usually silently). New Beginnings is said to address that specifically.

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WOW, those modules actually resonate with me a lot and I am impressed by your ability to recommend those which I have overlooked. Kind of wish I added them to my current ZP custom, but I was also considering making another custom, though I don’t exactly know the focus…

Particularly when I was young, I had experiences of being “left” either by friends or family.

Perhaps some type of healing custom with those two modules. I’m not exactly sure but definitely welcome to more suggestions.

Thank you.

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Thank you for your thank you. :rofl:

I think the matter is probably not so time-urgent. Frankly, the professional spheres of all societies are well-populated with people experiencing Impostor Syndrome. It will not hold you back from success. But it does interfere with fully enjoying and maximizing your success.

At some point, you’ll probably feel the time has come for a period of focused healing. When that time comes, you can put together a nicely custom-tailored program with these and other modules.

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hey man.

be careful with the biking.

a few years ago i was obsessed with testosterone levels so i did a lot of research in that area and learned that sitting on a bicycle regularly can be HORRIBLE for men and kill testosterone and lead to erectile dysfunction and other such problems.

please look into this before you continue any regular use of a bicycle.

i also learned similar things about cardio so i would advise you to also look into any links between heavy regular cardio and low testosterone.

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I do think that I have a deep-seated imposter syndrome. I don’t even know how you recommended the other module, because reading that really floored me (you’re a wizard or have impressive spiritual power), since it is an issue or topic that has periodically invaded my dreams for over a decade and led me to pursue meditation, healing, spirituality for a long time. I think these trauma have also contributed to my compassion for the suffering of others and wanting to “be there for others” as a doctor to provide support for those disadvantaged or felt “left” themselves. Pt-physician relationship is a special thing after all. Thing is that I am coming up on an important transition point in my life and career and am in pursuit of preparing myself for that. Healing will be very important and something that I seriously have to pursue. I want to rid myself of the negative parts of experiencing social trauma (have definitely done so in many ways), and I feel it is of utmost importance in my life. Just have to consider if a healing custom is something I need to fully dedicate to or can integrate with my current custom.

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Thanks Madara, that’s not something I really considered. I was using the bike heavily for the last few months but am going to focus much more on strength now, so good timing! Appreciate the concern and notice.


you should also know that a lot of weightlifting apparently also LOWERS testosterone.

its counter intuitive but back when i was obsessed with keeping my T as high as possible my research had led me to a 20 min workout twice per week.

that was what my testing and research showed was optimal for max testosterone naturally.

im not sure if you care about your T levels but if you do i strongly advise you to do some serious research before starting anything and to also get blood tests regularly to monitor T levels.


Definitely important to consider. I’m not worried since I am not an extreme athlete or anything where I think it would be more of a concern. I think my T levels are normal as I did some labs some years ago to check my levels. Appreciate and welcome the concern!

Taking an extra rest day from sub today.

Thinking about my personal philosophy for my journey long-term, themes of subs, order, progression, objectives of what I want to work on. I think my current custom fits #2, but I’m inspired to go back to working on #1 thx to Malkuth.

  1. Foundation: inner healing, self-understanding, trauma-release, self-love, purpose, stability, contentment, self-generated unconditional joy, peace
  2. Love spreads (inner joy overflows and spreads outward): social connection, communication, compassion, joy, love, positivity
  3. Love returns (you get what you put out): attraction, wealth generation, financial freedom, experiencing gifts of this life, mastery of physical world (flow of money, energy, influence), philanthropy, abundance
  4. Union: Transcendence, spirituality, oneness, deep understanding from God perspective, simplicity, truth, immortality, wisdom, peace
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Well than people in my country are fucked lol, as cycling is the main way of transportation of most people here.


I was very inspired to make a “healing custom” so I went ahead to do so and just listened to it.

"New Beginnings ZP": Dragon Reborn ST4, Sanguine, New Beginnings, Pride Unbroken, Inner Voice, ARES, I AM, Divine Will, Blue Skies, Depths of Love, Divine Self Image, Harmonic Singularity, Path of Forgiveness, Chosen of Venus, Faith Unyielding, Jupiter, Starfilled Night, Stress Displacement, The Flow, Power Awareness

Instantly felt in a deep meditative state. Feel completely relaxed like jello right now. Like I can’t even tense my muscles if I wanted to. Strong thoughts of self-compassion. Thoughts of self-love. Acknowledgment that I’ve been through a lot and I try very hard, and that I am proud of myself, that I don’t have to go through these things alone like I tend to feel. Mix of sadness, feeling strong energy in my chest/heart, almost like I want to cry, but at the same time feel like there is hope, that this can be a real new beginning. Just feel super relaxed right now, watching basketball and appreciating things. Very powerful state. Just feeling good and feel more grounded in the moment and present experience. Interested to see how this will continue going forward but I’m thankful.

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I’m no doctor but I can 100% say that what Mandara just mentioned is completely false lmao. Low T caused by exercise or heavy biking is not a thing. Overtraining and lack of sleep which can be caused by those two factors are the reason T can get lower. I’ve been training 5 times a week (Not overtraining) for years now and my T has always been good if not better since I did so MU “heavy research” is probably some reddit post;) but yeah if your T levels are good then you have nothing to worry about as long as you don’t overtrain.


Yeah, I haven’t explored any research around the topic but not too worried. I can see how maybe extreme periods of bike riding (pressure/temperature), or like you mentioned overtraining, stress, lack of recovery, sleep, can be important for levels short term.

Loop 2 of NB today


the growth process and the responses to subliminals tend to follow a sine wave or “spiral staircase” pattern. There are ups and downs within an overall tendency towards improvement.

Be mindful of this as you work with your program, enjoy the momentary euphorias and also try to take them in stride, and think in terms of a deeper long-term growth process as well.

Your decision to jump straight to Stage 4 of Dragon Reborn can work (according to the product description). There is a recommendation however to move through all of the stages. So realize that skipping stages may require you to work somewhat more gently with your custom. DR can be an intense program.

Sounds like it’s moving nicely right now. Hope you keep journaling and sharing your process.