Some feedback on Khan as the festival I was organising just finished yesterday,
Some context
With Wanted Black in November, I I got the charisma and cojones to get elected to a president position in a new NGO that had zero fundings and zero money in the bank.
I then switched to Khan in January. Between stage 1 and stage 2, I was kind of navigating between fucking women, and God knows what. Can’t really say what I was doing then, I became slowly the center of my power because realisations after realisations I understood nobody could completely help me, I had to rely on myself. I am ashamed to say it but I moved from hoping in an external God to some kind of God power that I can harness. I became less agressive in wanting to get laid, I was much less checking out women, yet still got approached by women (not as much as on Wanted Black though).
On stage 3, I chose to take the NGO to the next level and decided to organise a state wide festival to get our messages known, get public funding, get political partnership.
Through stage 3, I was pushing to make the idea accepted to the board as the team was quite afraid about the idea, everybody was new in the field.
On stage 4, I was full on in and fully convinced we had to to do it. Then I pushed through for it which implied so many things:
- Managed a board of important people/alpha male and women to work for/with me,
- Met women who introduced me to state level politicians to get ressources for the festival,
- Met all kind of men through all level who liked me and wanted to help me, got a full understanding on influencing through different levels,
- Managed/influenced state executives to get different venues (theatre, our national park, etc) available to us for free for our festival,
- Got through getting interviewed on state tv/radio/news outlets to get the public onboard and further influencing on political execs. Which implied getting comfortable speaking and talking like a visionary guy with passion and vision, and handling journalists
- Got through the stress, pressure for this kind of event, the logistics, the last minute changes, the questions, the team whining. I don’t feel stress anymore, it is like the same feeling but with no belief attached to it,
- Got a full understanding of what it is, what it take to be the top dog: everybody looks up to you, yet most responsibility is on you, you need to know when to play hard or soft, if you fail some are already there to take you down (because my team is mostly made of ambitious alpha male/females)
- Got approached by thousands of people who told me how what I was doing was inspiring them
- Got take down, by radio hosts, politicians, other NGOs or other activists, because of power struggle lol (sounds familiar? Lol)
I am a little tired, as the festival ended yesterday, I may be a little burned off, yet zero pressure, fully satisfied.
- Most satisfying achievement I got was to have the most influential people from our most import political party buddying me and wanting to partner with my NGO.
- Most satisfying skill I acquired is social influence, ability to talk like a leader, I wondered if I wanted to be a Chosen leader or a Khan leader, and I prefer the power and aggressiveness of Khan that yet can still be caring.
- I know some people like to know this : I don’t do porn in general, and I am not against masturbation, but since stage 3 or stage 4, maybe before I am not sure, I decided to transmute when I feel I want to masturbate. So no PMO since stage 3.
TL;DR : In 3 months I went from being a respected yet unknown white collar engineer, to a NGO president with state-wide influence, invited on medias, coached by the mayor of our state capital-city, leading an upcoming NGO, leading a team of alpha males/women, and supported by old money. I think I said it somewhere in this forum, what I wanted to be my ideal life, and this is in alignment in how I want my life to be. Lots of challenging to where I want to go but nothing I can’t figure. Next step is buddying the head of state, to have the state “in my pocket”, but I think with what I/we have achieved already the head of state already know us so it will be a slam dunk.
When I read my TL;DR a second Tim I have some cognitive dissonance because it reads like I am bragging, and I have my mind trying to rationalising my whole experience and telling me I am not that amazing because x or y. The mind is fascinating. Anyway.
I will keep stage 4 for a while in a single core custom maxing out alpha ness, power, sexual energy and sexual attraction.
Love,
EDIT:
Got asked listening pattern / fixed
