I know you wrote this to, Saint.
You have deep thoughts, as always.
While you are waiting, here are some things to think about.
Charm and humor can be a strong points. Often when people are in groups, they might have worries about being accepted, and you are probably the one in the group who makes people feel at ease.
Now let’s do a thought experiment. What if someone was hired to follow you around, and at a time when you least expect it, when your guard is down, said something negative about you, your body, your gender, how you look, etc. Then when it shocked you, they said “Just joking”. Might be funny at first. Over time, what do you think it might do to your self esteem? What about how much you trust what that person says if they are back pedaling with “just joking”? What emotions might get slowly associated with your identity over time because it gets repeated?
In other words, how important do you think your internal self-talk is?
I give women near asthma attacks, as you pointed out. And you’re getting people close to choking. I’m seeing a breathing theme here. 
