Khan ST1 - Day 9
Limitless - Day 18
Today when I wake up, I felt a sense of insecurity/fragility.
I believe that Limitless is making me want to learn to draw, because I feel this desire for drawing and learning to draw better.
On the other hand, with university it’s a bit bad, I’m not motivated to study.
Maybe you’ll want to help khan with some more healing subs, like regeneration or elixir to get you over the hump of issues you’re wrestling with.
If it helps can be a good idea. Which of the two do you recommend?
I’ve seen people use Khan ST 1 & Regen and if I remember right it’s just better to go with The Elixir as your booster with Total Breakdown. My all time favorite is Sanguine for that mood boost and goodness but I never upgraded when it became Ultima.
So Elixir seem the best choice to pair with Khan ST1, right? Why not Regeneration?
Regeneration is to bring up your traumas and take you through them or something. The idea is you don’t need that since you’re already doing Total Breakdown. But if it calls to you absolutely use Regeneration.
The Elixir is like a mood boost and frees up energy or something.
I’ve never tried any of the healing titles other than khan ST1 so I can’t speak on them. Look to the sales page to speak to you I’d say. Or even dragon reborn.
I think all you really need to do is stick it out once you hit that 30 day mark you’ll have gotten to some positive aspects of ST 1.
That’s good!
If I notice that I need Elixir I will try to use it to see how it affects me with TB.
Dragon reborn seem heavy to me to being added with Khan.
Khan ST1 - Day 10
Limitless - Day 19
Important thing: I always feel the need to control how I deal with people, if my communication is alpha enough, I have to stop this behavior. An alpha does not need to verify that it behaves as an alpha, as long as I behave naturally, whether it is alpha or beta who cares, the important thing is not to be obsessively self-conscious and to control my behavior all the time.
Tonight it happened as usual, an invisible force and a thousand excuses in my head blocked me from hit on some girls, who in the end went to other males. My mind goes blank and no clever idea springs from it, or maybe something is there but a pinch of courage is lacking.
I am always immersed in a thousand excuses in my head that are the basis of some fear.
What should I do? Let me free myself from such negative states by Khan ST1, to act from a free state without such negative emotions? Or make an effort to act despite these blocks?
It bothers me a lot to have these handicaps and I want to change … conquer …
Great motivation in study for university.
Khan ST1 - Rest Day - (Days done 10)
Limitless - Rest Day - (Days done 19)
The Elixir - Day 1
I try to use on rest days like today The Elixir and see the effects.
In my mind the victim mentality is disappearing, I start to feel my inner self urging me to be responsible for my life because only “I” can change things. Complaining about things or being a victim will not lead me to anything, only by acting and taking my responsibilities I can do something. I am responsible for my life, no one else.
Also, the more I fail, the more I feel the need to excel, and to act (And non-action for me is the greatest of failures, like last night).
Yesterday’s defeat gave me the strength for today’s victory.
Tonight there were the girls from yesterday I wanted to talk to, I did and they turned out to be nice girls. I have not done anything great because then they went away, but I would have liked to deepen the rapport.
One of them remained, I saw some little flirtations with her but I wonder if she does this with everyone (because her personality seem extrovert) or if she finds me appealing. I have just this problem, that I never know if women like me or not while interacting with them. Even when they laugh and there are signs, inside me there is a little monster who says to me “Are you sure they laugh because they like you? Won’t they just be polite to you? Are you sure you’re attractive enough to afford this girl? ”. This voice creates doubts about who I am and whether I am attractive or not. The bad thing is that I do not feel attractive, although I could be objectively, I have the doubt if I am an attractive guy, despite the signs, I understand now that I see them with a negative lens or doubtful.
Khan ST1 - Day 11
Limitless - Day 20
The Elixir - Rest Day - (Days done 1)
I know this is an older post. However, @Azriel would you be willing to link to or post what you’ve learned about tinnitus?
How are you foxdie?
I’m fine, thank you!
that’s a larger endeavor I can’t go into fully right now
I’ll say this
not a health professional
first- rule out any hearing loss or underlying medical/ structural causes with the proper professional’s ENT, neurologist etc.
Even congestion/ ear wax -mixed with hypervigilance can contribute to it
Then look into neuroplasticity and tinnitus and/or tension myotis syndrome and tinnitus
in my experience there is huge underlying trauma, emotional, stress causes related to it.
Recon from subs has on and off brought this up for me as have subs with strong intelligence/cognitive shifts but this is almost unheard of generally. Time off or moving through recon brings me back to baseline.
Custom wtih Paragon with ASPS: Ear when I ran it completely eliminated it for me during the time I ran it and for a month or two after.
I no longer consider tinnitus as a clinical anything. I at times become aware of a dimension of something going on for me in terms of internal process and there are some sounds-like hearing my breath or heart beat. At times there is complete silence. They’re both parts of my consciousness and experience and either is fine.