Today was the definition of the “Seeker of Truth” day
To give a quick summary:
As you know I’m working as a teacher and I will start as a freelancer on the 1st of march. This is honestly because of the school. I asked them if I could work as a freelancer instead of an employee because it’s better for me to work for myself. They were a bit disappointed, but they agreed and gave me a nice offer to start as a freelancer I am really grateful because, without them, I never knew that teaching is what I am supposed to do in this world.
When we were negotiating, I was ill-prepared. I just walked into the meeting without doing any background. I asked for 60 because I knew freelancers get around 60-75 in education. She said that this was way too much and that most teachers start at 35 (I’m talking about euro btw). I knew this was a lie and that she was lying to me, but I just listened to what they had to say. A couple of days later they made me an offer. 400 euro’s a day. This means pre-work, 6 hours of class, after work, e-mail contacts, and checking reports and exams of the students. I knew by then, that most teachers made 50 euros per hour and got 20 mins per examen to check. We mostly work with reports instead of tests. Because I literally went to all the teachers and asked how they made lol, straight up no shame haha. Most of them were pleased and surprised that I had the guts to ask them that. Purely because I’m new to this.
Most told me that they made 50 euro’s an hour. Everybody had different preparation times, but most of them got 20min for checking exams and 1-2 hours of preparation time. When I started to count, I knew with a rate of 50 euros, that would make 8 hours a day. Our lesson days are 6 hours + 1 hour of preparation and 1 hour afterwork. That means 350-400 hours a day.
As stated, they offered me 400 for all-inclusive, but to me, this was not enough. I want to have 400 a day like most teachers, and get paid for the checking of reports. Especially because they are growing very fast and most classes are changing from 16 to 28. That means almost double the check work without getting paid for it. I didn’t like it, I want to get paid for what I do, not a penny more or less.
So I went back to them and told them “I’m a bit hesitant about the check work that’s not getting paid, that’s a bit dangerous” Now my female boss lost it. Getting really agitated and pissed that I was negotiating because they did so much for me. To me business is business, no emotions attached.
She said “Nooo this is an amazing offer!! if you don’t take this then I will give you nothing etc. etc. etc.” She started to emotionally manipulate me. The same way my mother did to me when I was a child. So what happened? I acted like my 7-year-old self and said “oke I agree to 400 euro’s a day” Feeling absolutely terrible because I know most teachers make 50 A hour.
Now, not to brag but my review is a 9,5 average. I have the most students reply to the evaluation of all the teachers and one of the highest scores. Most students tell me that I’m the best teacher they have got in this school. They finally learn something instead of a guy that’s just reading the PowerPoint and doing nothing else. Again NA teaches me to be humble, but I know in my heart I deserve this and that I’m exceptional well in this craft. Today again students told me after the lesson “I learned absolutely nothing at this school. But you and Jaco (Another new teacher) are the only ones that actually teach me something”. Honestly, this pissed me off. You are a teacher, do your fucking job, and don’t waste your student’s time. It’s a privilege to have people in a class to spend their time (what they paid for) with you. Do your absolute best to teach them in the best way possible.
I always make my own lessons, I adjust them with every class to meet the needs of my students. I take time in my feedback and really try to learn and educate my students. I even work on the weekends and do it with the most joy while being in rehab and having these heavy withdrawal symptoms. Most colleges always laugh at my feedback because it’s so long. They tell me that I can make it much shorter and the exam commission doesn’t care. I don’t give a damn about that, I want my students to learn.
So now that I’m sober and my confidence and clarity are slowly coming back. I was like “Wait a minute, I am not going to get paid less than teachers that don’t perform as well” I don’t have to be paid the most, but I will definitely not be the last. So I made a new offer and presented it today.
Today I had a meeting to talk about the planning for next march. Instead of planning, I wrote a new offer to them for 50 euros an hour with 20 min examen time. Also because my bargaining position changed because this other school wants to give me work and pays more. Of course, my boss got irritated again, but this time I did not let myself get emotionally manipulated. He was lying, straight in my face. Telling me that most teachers make less than me and that this is an amazing offer. They even got mad that I asked other teachers what they got paid. I told them honestly. I understood why he got mad because I confronted his lies with the truth. Nobody likes that.
I felt this kid coming up again and while in conversations I told myself “No, I deserve this, I speak the truth here and they are lying. I’m not gonna back down and accept less while I’m worth much more”. So I ended with “This is my offer, I won’t accept the 400 euro and explained why. I can go to the other school without any problems and get paid €20 per hour more. The reason that I stay is that I’m grateful because if you guys never put me in front of a class, I would never figure out that teaching is my passion. That’s why I don’t want to leave, I like it here. If that means you can only give me 2 days instead of 3, I don’t mind and take that. But I will get paid the same as the other teachers and this is my price.” He tried to guilt trip me one more time, but I hold firm.
We will sit next Thursday again and he will tell me if he accepts my offer. Whether he accepts it or not, I can look into the mirror now I spoke the truth and respected myself. Something I have not done in a long time.
When I got home, I was writing this message with a lot of judgment. That’s why I took some time to really reflect on what happened before typing it here. Because to me, this journal/forum is sacred ground. I went on my knees and sent out a question in prayer. I asked him if I was being selfish because I did not agree with the 400 euros. I felt peaceful after that, a bit scared, but peaceful. I feel it was the right decision and I’m glad that I stood up for myself and spoke my truth.
I’ll keep you guys posted what the offer is next Thursday.
Love you all