Remember to tell yourself the truth…
Remember to tell yourself the truth. You know what that means.
The truth is you need to do more. The truth is you need to be more to reach your fullest maximum capacity and capability as a human being.
And if you tell yourself that truth, you will find discipline.
And if you find discipline, you will find freedom.Jocko Willink
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The virtuous framework of my custom makes it seriously challenging to accept improper things. Im having a really difficult time not voicing my agressive opinions about another coworker and his training times/failure rate. I have a strong dislike towards this guy and found out today he failed his 90 day review for the third time. And guess what happened…they extended his training another 30 days. Unfuckingbelievable. The union keeps crying ‘unfairness’ and its bullshit. I cant seem to not get upset by it all. I see strong injustice in these side deal, corrupt ass meetings trying to float dead weight. Get this fucker outta here but no, apparently the company values low integrity retards.
I dont know why im so triggered by the whole thing other than the Virtue framework. Im literally unable to accept or embrace this shit. I see this dude with anger and contempt, nothing else. I have zero compassion or understanding for him. Enough is enough. 3 extensions, over 3 failures, unreal.
I dont know if im filled with reckless aggression or righteous indignation, either way ive just been angry this week. I keep it restrained mostly but that fire just stays burning within me. Im also hypersensitive to respect/disrespect and just overly touchy lately. Super fed up with it all
Jesus did say Woe to those who call bad, good and good, bad. Seems like theres A LOT of that bullshit going around.
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Fri
Listening day 18
Arete - 5 min
Regon - 3 min
No LBFH today as im not sure where my struggle is coming from. Most days the past two weeks have been more contempt bomb for humanity than love bomb for humanity. Going to see if things level out without it.
I honestly feel that ive drifted away from my ideal self lately, less Spiritual, less focused on The Lord, less loving. Ive been more preoccupied with strength (physical and mental), more agressive and judgemental. Chasing inspired action type stuff. Im happy with the growth overall but im definitely drifting and I want to get back into alignment.
Currently I dont feel my heart is right Spiritually and physically I look tired everyday as if ive been pushing this whole time, the kind of tired that sleep is not fixing.
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I started going low nickel on top of my strict diet and the past week or so has been rough fatigue wise. Who knew nickel detox would be such a burden.
Ive been dealing with my right side too. Found out my lower right rhomboid isnt activating correctly as well as it seems theres some issue with my shoulder/bicep that has been compensating and is just strained from overwork. Now I get why my arm would hurt after 10 push ups and why I could never advance. I tried a different variation of push up the last day or two and man I cant tell if im sore because im still not activating the needed muscles or the right muscles are waking up and are not used to it.
This is the year I work on fixing this stuff. You just get tired of waking up and looking at weakness, problems, pain ect. Not only am I removing all the inner child damage, Spiritual corruption, brainwashing and negative programming but addressing physical injury, toxicity especially and eating completely differently. Its all going to get better no matter how long it takes cuz Im not going back and im damn sure not staying the same.
I have my next neurofeedback session today before work, hopefully this one goes just as good. Aside from feeling physically beat down today I am feeling pretty good. I have been working hard to maintain consistency in all my habits. Reading scripture everyday, no exceptions. Rucking everyday, no exceptions. Stretching, food discipline and maintaining proper sleep/wake times. The only thing I slid on was my breathing protocol and I thought I was ‘better’ now only to notice that theres more work to do.
I have to EARN self-respect everyday. The choices I make each day need to reflect a strong, centered man. Consistency can overcome anything. I struggle with rest though, its feels wrong sometimes like laziness but thats why I have Regeneration & Paragon to help balance it all. Arete says “Let’s go!” And Regon says “Balance motherfucker, balance!”
I really want to fix this right side shoulder/back muscle issue, I wonder what it feels like to work out without pain or limit. I want to use Spartan and go hard but this is stopping me…for now.
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I’ve chilled out on the intensity of contempt towards others. I think I am working through that reconciliation finally. Theres definitely a lack of love somewhere and I would benefit greatly from another long run of both Love Bombs in the future. I can feel the lack of that foundation hindering the expression of those high frequency virtues, values and behaviors.
I am doing my best to detach from expectations of idealization in people and the world. Its more important that I focus my energy of change onto myself and the energy of love and service onto others when opportunities present themselves. I’ve spent too much energy in vain for decades trying to move things outside myself to fit my idea of correct or right.
The concept is simple, not always easy but with the right heart, awareness and guidance, I can make it my new normal.
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Ask yourself, am I giving my time, energy and attention to activities and things that are going to build me, help me level up and ascend or am I giving my attention and energy to things I know are just holding me back and keeping me stuck in the same place preventing me from reaching my goals.
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Fri
Listening day 19
Arete - 7 min
Regon - 5 min
Increased loops today, things have been pretty stable as far as reconciliation and growth. I continue to struggle though with letting go of resentment towards others, specifically regarding my place of employment.
I am currently reading through the Book of John and I felt straight convicted when I reached Ch. 13 Verse 34/35.
34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
35 By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
I have not been living up to this at all and have even found myself throwing out accusations about a coworker which tells me im not in a good place Spiritually. So I am working on removing myself from anything related to this issue. I have to watch out for other coworkers bringing it up and not falling into the trigger trap. Im starting to realize this might just be a test and Im not passing currently. The path to righteousness is not easy. Im just grateful im getting a wake up call and working on changing things.
Another thing is my arm issue Im working on seems to be the coracoid process of the scapula/coracobrachialis strain. So far im not seeing much advice on healing/fixing it other than variated push ups, trigger points therapy/massage. Apparently ‘rest’ wont fix it, it needs use to regrow the muscle fibers. Idk…but im focusing on super strict form and mind/muscle connection. I’ll give it a few weeks and see if anything changes. Now I see why I cant put my right arm behind my back and lift up, you feel it exactly in the coracoid process muscle. At least the issue has been identified.
I continue adding exercise to my morning routine alongside my rucking. Super consistent, never skipping a day. Using light therapy on schedule too. Being in my 9 personal year is really pushing me to let go all so much of my past. Old identities, old habits, old trauma and injuries its all going away.
Breaking The Cycle and Power of Sacrifice are two very potent modules for letting go of shit that no longer serves your goals and life. Ive dropped a lot of dead weight since starting Arete. Behaviors, limiting beliefs, unproductive actions even down to things I used to buy and use, certain shoes or clothing ect. Everything in my life is up for audit and I love the vigilance towards streamlining myself, my daily choices. Its all in the micro - change and fine tune the micro and watch the macro of your life evolve.
After delving into numerology and understanding my life path, Ive been better able to fine tune my strengths and let go of pursuing things that dont fit. For example 4’s biggest weakness is laziness so I prioritize Discipline, purpose and motivation and stay in alignment with that. 4s are highly structured, law & order, routine loving ppl. So I focus on that. 4s do not do well in the spotlight or leadership positions but thrive behind the scenes or 2nd in command types so I dont bother pursuing leadership as its not a natural calling for my energy type. I’d be much better running Emperor/Emp Black than ever touching stark or Khan as a 4 LP. Its become easier for me to build customs or choose subs based on knowing these traits of mine. No more wasted effort trying to adopt an archetype that doesnt align with me.
Even though 2026 is my enemy year and not even half over yet, things have been going well overall. Ive gotten hit a few times already but nothing overly damaging to myself or life. Granted I am a hybrid so my enemy year wont be as bad as a pure Rat in a horse year so thats a plus.
The biggest challenge currently for me aside from addressing my physical health/body is fixing my heart Spiritually. I can be too rigid and unforgiving and that scares me because If I cant forgive others, The Lord wont forgive me. If I dont have Love for others then nothing I do really has any meaning, its empty. Gotta get right.
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Fully emotionally triggered today. My mother stopped by and just this whole thing erupted within me over concepts of presence, quality time, appreciation and prioritization. Her behavior and complete lack of awareness just hit me straight on. I was feeling great since my loops Fri but today something came to the surface relating to my mother and childhood.
In order for me to embody the best version of myself, these things must manifest. I am saddened to say that I did snap a bit but it wasnt at her as much as it was to her. I barely held the tears back until she left. I was truly shocked at how upset I felt, it came from a deep wound for sure.
Regeneration must be expressing today though I wasnt able to contain it very easily.
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Listening day 20
Arete - 9 min
Regon - 5 min
True freedom is an internal state, not an external condition. Without self-discipline, a person becomes a slave to their own passions, impulsive desires, and external circumstances.
Things are good. Things are steady and moving in the right direction. I think my flow factor has improved a little bit since craniosacral therapy and my lifestyle changes, either that or Hero/Glm are just titles im super aligned with. Trying 9 mins today, as I was listening I felt this desire for more as if I was craving the scripting so that was cool. Im loving Glm, Discipline is becoming my favorite word and my favorite thing. Im constantly wanting to do the hard thing or start my day with the most challenging tasks. Ive always done that to be honest but before it was driven by fear, anger or self punishment. Now its driven by enthusiasm, opportunity engagement and a sense of ‘Get Some!’ energy.
The transformation from Arete continues to be Epic. Aside from tweaking my custom in the future, im not sure theres any other sub id want to run. Most of the new stuff coming out is not that interesting.
Man, you change the mindset - you change the man. Get rid out complaining, pessimism, indifference, doubt and victim mindset and a whole new world appears. The world tries to destroy your perception and self image through consumption and comparison among other things but with these modules and programs you can turn it all around. Grateful 
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Since that 9 min loop, the challenge of mediocrity has been at the forefront of my mind. Followed by frustration by the urge to act but held back by circumstances not quickly resolved.
Ive had this anti-mediocrity before with Hero, but its back even stronger now. My minds been reeling over choices, decisions and paths to take. Overwhelmed by a strong desire to act but without full understanding once again.
Every week though I get closer. I can see progress in many areas but my minds focused on what else. Consistency has been the key for me and my minds hungry to address everything.
Mastery of self seems to be the most important thing to me. Ive become so uninterested in others its becoming amusing. I used to be so focused externally and being that way got me nowhere good. I wonder how much further id have gone had I had this mindset earlier. Most days im in awe thinking about mindsets and how they relate to actions people take or dont take. How absolutely stuck I was before, looking back at that old mindset with this new one. I want to build the strongest mindset I can. I want to laugh in the face of all vices and temptations. I want to remove comfort from my life and stay just a little hungry(physically and metaphorically)everyday to cultivate sharpness.
Self restraint, self-deprivation anchor gratitude daily. Doing what needs done and not bothering with wants and desires that create the soft life society is pushing onto men.
Needing nothing attracts everything. Be uncommon. The less like the status quo I become, The better I become. This is the goal.
Hero, Glm and Spartan(soon) will be the foundation for me. I really want to see a Christ archetype subliminal from SaintSovereign but for now, Ill keep trying to piece it all together through customs.
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Fri
Listening day 21
Arete - 10 min
Regon - 5 min
Basics, mastering the basics seems to be the theme of my life. Im slowly and steadily retracting from the external. Im consuming less and less of the world while realigning toward the internal, everything which I have control over. I cant seem to tolerate or entertain other people like I use to. I find it difficult to watch any show, movie or video that isnt in alignment with growth, discipline, virtue or Spiritual pursuits. Mainstream just doesnt really exist anymore. Im overly focused on myself and the ways I can improve.
Hero seriously makes you feel uncomfortable with anything and everything that isnt ‘good’ for you. Glm added to that creates a powerful, positive push towards righteous growth. I really cannot emphasize how good these subs are. My daily routine, my behavior and my goals are so dialed in now, its unlike any other sub or time in my life thus far. This is the most complete Ive ever felt and that is not something to take for granted at all.
Recon has been much more manageable since reaching longer loops and addressing a lot of small issues in my life. The more I live my life in alignment with what I say and think I want, the easier the subs process and the stronger I become.
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A man who can’t control himself will always be controlled by something else.
I am really starting to love the days that I dont feel like it, those days feel the best when I do it anyways. Everyday I wake up looking to do the hard thing first. Im working on training myself to get excited or hyped over anything I normally dread. Re-framing is a powerful tool, building positive momentum at the start creates this almost effortless ease that makes the rest of the day go by smoothly.
By stacking a lot of small wins in the beginning of my day, by the time I get to work Im in a great mood with a sense of invulnerability where nothing people do or say effects me and I focus hard on my work.
Im becoming very aware of weakness too. I can spot it in my mind, in thoughts as well as in others. I find myself overly sensitive to it and view it as a literal poison now. My mind is so primed for success and opportunity that I cant give my energy to anything else.
Courage Reclaimed and Synergy: Winner Overdrive are powerful as heck, at least for me. Its the closest I’ve felt to ‘Unrelenting’ but I want more.
This past month my minds been opening up and expanding around possibilities, its been wild. I’ll drive by a neighborhood with really nice homes and have thoughts like “Why cant I get one of those?” As in, “why not me?” And I feel this sense of empowerment that I could achieve whatever I work for. The traumatic limitations that plagued me are dying and I feel a sense of vigor towards having an actual life. My mind is constantly analyzing moves, ways to elevate. If only I turn up the intensity a little more on this drive.
I cant wait to see myself in 6 more months. See the progress in all the areas im working on. Im finally making changes for me, nothing is external based and maybe thats why Ive been so consistent for once.
My sleep is finally stabilized and im between 7.5 to 9 hours of continuous sleep. Breathwork and circadian rhythm alignment work has paid off. As one example.
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Is there a module that helps address gossip/mocking and generally minding your own business? Not letting yourself get pulled into drama, keeping opinions to yourself?
I get triggered by perceived injustices at work. I go overboard with my opinions which I shamefully admit can and do turn into condemnation, gossip and mocking and Im really fed up with this weak ass character defect.
Just because something bothers me does not mean I have to react or respond. Idk if its the Hero/Glm virtue scripting making me so sensitive that I feel I must contribute in some way or what but Id rather be quiet, detached and frankly unbothered by it all. Granted we’ve all been pulled into work drama and gossip at some point but Im really starting to notice how easily I am being influenced to stir the pot with my opinions and its going to backfire on me sooner or later. I am already starting to get a slight reputation. I just dont know how to not be affected when I see ‘wrong’ and everyone is indifferent to it.
Almost everyone I see has no pride in thier work, poor character, poor work ethic, embraces laziness and lying and it fires me the hell up. How do I overcome this…
This is a bottleneck for me. There is no honor in my behavior regarding this situation and I devalue myself when I engage like this. The desire to improve myself is strong and im doing great things, but when it comes to other people I am stuck being around its not good. I feel contempt and judgement and I struggle not expressing it wether verbally or with behavior.
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Fri
Listening day 22
Arete - 11 min
Regon - 7 min
Self-Optimization is the focus. Paragon has been, in my opinion showing me all the little issues I have been unaware of or ignoring with myself for too long. Biomechanics rabbit holes, postural restoration and skeletal alignments have been my priority this week specifically. Figuring out my right side issues are not separate but all related, ordered new shoes for my rucking. Turns out that for me, barefoot shoes were causing some issues. Turns out Im pretty sure I have an Left AIC pelvic pattern and why I have a slight anterior pelvic tilt only on the right side. Lower right rhomboid issue caused by all this misalignment. I dont think I ever would have taken action to figure this all out with Paragon. My goals is to fix the root, the foundation and resolve this finally. Wanting to get in shape, build a stronger body but being limited by b.s. issues is aggravating but im getting there, it all takes dedicated actions and the right information. I wasnt expecting that much from Paragon but if I actually think about it, A lot of my changes can be attributed to it. Its more valuable than I gave it credit for.
Aside from the physical, the inner hostility Ive been dealing with seemed to have started fading yesterday but im not sure its gone. I really think its about me and not other. Some weird form of projection and intolerance. Regeneration could be helping, Idk but I have daily struggles tolerating low frequency behavior, poor mindsets, low integrity, lying, laziness, debauchery and immaturity. I literally dont want it near or around me and can become quite uncomfortable at times. I of course in times past was engaged in those states but now Im not and so I think I react in a less than ideal way when exposed to it all and Ive yet to find a mature way to coexist when required. Ill find out next week about that unqualified coworker and whether ill be forced to coexist or be free but in general Im trying to not feel so viscerally angry around different mindsets and behavior because it doesnt serve a positive function to be like that.
I should be utilizing Virtues for positive purposes, not letting negativity reign or allowing Ego to subvert them for pride or arrogance. Theres times I feel like I need to humble myself hard, mostly from internally built perceptions not outward behavior but ive caught myself a few times thinking I was out of line and thats not the path I want to be on. I wish I had an extra spot in my custom for Light of Humility, it probably needs to be included.
But there is that saying…
So maybe Im just trying to find balance and my perception of myself isnt really that bad.
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My boss said to me “Thank you for being an overachiever, I really appreciate everything you do” tonight at work.
Gratitude
I noticed that there was zero inflation within me when receiving that comment. My response was “Someone has to, if I dont then no one else will”. It came almost automatically, not even a thank you back. I kind of wonder whether I dismissed the recognition or simply let it pass by without latching onto the validation because I am so internally validated and stoicly detached now. Its not that I felt nothing, just that I really didnt ‘need’ it at all and that is a nice win in my book.
It seems I am not that affected by praise or even the lack thereof. The self-validation from Hero and Glm is real.
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If you dont provide value, nobody cares about you. Thats just a fact.
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Fri
Listening day 23
Arete - 12 min
Regon - 7 min
I spent all week across my state at a company training class. My resilience really showed. I hardly got upset, annoyed or frustrated whether travel related, it being hot out, hotel issues or loud guests. I could really the effects on Glm on my overall behavior being in an unfamiliar environment.
I frequented the same restaurant every evening for dinner and regardless of the server, I made small talk and complimented them when the opportunity arose as well as showing appreciation and gratitude to them for thier service. The Kindness, Charity and Gratitude scripting was showing real nice. I tipped more than normal and also just felt a strong desire to make others days if whatever way I could. This felt like real inner growth and I was embodying the qualities Ive sought out for years. It was interesting to see myself embracing connection with others as for decades I was so against connecting to anyone and even better was how unattached I was as if everything was meant to be ‘single serving’.
I couldnt do my daily rucks but I did use the hotel gym while gone to maintain routine and structure. Its become extremely important as a 4 to have a solid routine that I keep no matter what. Today at home when I got up, it was back to the grind and I love it. This stack has seriously elevated me and this process of becoming better is so satisfying 
that I really want nothing else these days. Im so invested in myself that the external has lost its appeal. Until I am the best version of myself, everything else can wait.
I did receive great news last night, the other guy in my dept that was training (still) was finally dropped. Society seems to reward mediocrity but this time doing the right thing prevailed. I went hard trying to show how much he did not belong in our department and I feel vindicated and justified in my pursuit to expose him. I am super grateful that I no longer have to worry about working with such dead weight. Step up or step off.
I finally received my new PRI inspired work shoes, between those and my walking/running shoes my overall pain in areas ive struggled with have reduced greatly. Who knew those barefoot shoes were causing so much issues but it makes sense. It starts in the feet. I am hyped to continue figuring out the few physical limitations I have and fixing everything permanently. Paragon has been interesting, while I dont magically wake up fixed lol, the actions I seem to take end up helping a lot and most of the time it doesnt even occur to me to relate it to Paragon. It deserves more credit. I might think im finding therapies, or trying different things and its just me but I doubt it. Im addressing the foundation of health. Even before Paragon, two years ago I started with the diet and over time Ive seen good results and now I seem very focused on structure, alignment and proper function. Specifically musculoskeletal lately and I credit that focus to Paragon. It really does help you see whats priority whether you consciously realize it or not. I just seemed to have started working on it and then realized why later.
Ive been increasing my Hero/Glm custom each week by 1 minute the past few listens and its been going really well. Surprisingly I get mild reconciliation symptoms the first 24 to 36 hours after listening and then nothing. I seem to be embracing the stack well and I find myself eagerly awaiting my next listening day. Out of all the subs Ive used (which isnt that many compared to most users) Ive never really ‘craved’ any except for Arete’, this custom just feels right.
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