i don’t want to feel weak because of this girl. I don’t want to feel hopeless.
I looked for some finance basics but I haven’t yet started to investment.
And I have lessons to work. Exams are closing, and I want 4.0 GPA in this period.
I need things to keep me busy, but I’m talking about things like studying.
Also I want to develop my self intellectualy but still I don’t read books regularly. I don’t want to feel empty, because I feel. I feel my self like an idiot. I want to realize myself. But right I don’t know how, even if I know I’m not aware or even if I’m aware Im not doing it, I don’t know. i feel like im stucked for a long time.
And I want say something in general I don’t feel safe. I always feel like there is hole in my heart.
And I say I want to do master at abroad but what I’m gonna when I get there, in socially? I don’t have religious beliefs but especially if I compared to myself I’m more like traditional (conservative) guy. And I’m not sure can I find a girlfriend / wife at there. Maybe I will be more alone at there.
And about shoes I looked at shopping malls but still I’m undecided, my right foot bigger than the other and it creates problem for me. I found some but im not sure about them
And I should improve my English. I almost have no experience about speaking.