Today I did introspection after a long time,most likely it was RoM result I’ve only listened to it once
And idk why I also questioned the reliability of subliminals(probably RoM again or just recon).
There are some things that make me feel bad
And RoM manifested to my music taste,after a long time I listened Pink Floyd and some Led Zeppelin and they are my favourites music groups
I’m in wash out and I don fucking any feel good. My mind confused right now fuck it.there are things that confuse me I feel depressed for a few days.
I say I have to focus my lessons and… I don’t know. only thing I have to do is just focus my lessons
I must not focus on anything else. Cause if I thought enters my mind(except lessons,exam) it distracte me from lessons my focus shift to this. Yes I have problems,Some areas of my life are lacking.but I can’t focus them this year I cannot,I should just focus my lesson not other things,I dont wanna live same things again again.i must succed this exam this year.this exam is psychological war and I cannot lose again
I have time to study today but will I do ?
I wrote something in my offline journal. And I feel better.I need to get rid of the negative influences of ego. Funny… You just have to delve into
What have you found helpful when experiencing this in previous washouts?
I think it is not directly about washout.maybe it understood a little wrong.i felt bad and rn i’m in washout.of course being washout might effect this way but there are things that effect me badly sometimes.and I think I have to first solve this(get clarity) and as I mentioned after it felt good to write in my offline journal
Fuck I took a L today,man.
It was this morning I was listening a song. And then I googled this artist. And then I saw her ex wife in his bio I looked her Instagram and I saw her bikini pics that I didn’t expect that she was looking decent woman.fuck. in this moment I didn’t get horny quickly . But after 5-10 minutes I was reading something and I get horny. I looked some nsfw photos but I didn’t mastubate I closed phone.
But then I started looking at these things again.and I did pmo.i haven’t been in pmo for two months and I broke it.
In first pmo I didn’t feel bad , ashamed but I didn’t feel good afterwards either.it was huge c*major
But when I did twice I feel little bad. I can’t feel like a man after this
I don’t know. I have problems.and i have to make some decisions and I don’t wanna deal with p*rn shit again. Because this year could be the most important year of my life and I don t wanna lose time and energy with this.
“easy peasy way to get quit porn” has helped me in the past(though I haven’t finished this book yet) I could read this book again but actually I don’t want to cause it feels like waste of time I have other things to read
I was thinking adding EB to my stack I will buy probably Paragon and I have some thoughts to buy DR LD maybe it could solve my p*rn issue forever
This year I will re-prepare for uni exam and I don’t want p*rn to be an escape for me
When I began to do this viscorious thing I can’t control my self I don’t know really but I think things like this damage the human soul I wander how this affects people’s higher-selfs
I was thinking post somethings for a few days to here but after pmo i feel like I have no right to post here,Like if I write here I’ll feel hypocritical.
I have to remind myself when I don’t pmo Iam not losing anything,I am not missing.i am not gainin anythingh from this shit .it s fucking.trap and
when more you do the worse it gets
I have to be addicted to winning not to p*rn and masturbate
What is p*rn’s correspondence in astral realms
Iam wondering
(And sorry to everyone writing too much p*rn to here)
I mean yeah I can stay away from p*rn for 3 months etc(for a long time) but can this heal the damage done by p,rn, how can I reverse the effects on my brain?
If I was concerned about something such as that, I would use the Bio-Tuner by Sota. I would also use Dr. Schulze Brain tonic, and his Superfood formula. I would also minimize my time on the internet.
i should write now this. i played Paragon for 4 times.i also played today and i still have head ache etc I took painkiller again. i didn’t see any f***ing result from paragon
Nothing
First i listened paragon 17th day of my last cycle.
And i listened 20,21th days for too cause i had flu,headache and shoulder neckpain,and sure I took my pills than 5 days washout I also take antibiotics.
And i listened in the morning and i had no pain,but later today I have still pain and i took pill again
And i don’t know how this subs work? How many days i should wait?? How many??for months???!!