First 30 Seconds Of Talking To A Stranger

[friday]

Hey, I hope you are all having a good day!

There is something that really fucks me up. As I child I was rather quiet and enjoyed my own headspace and the tranquility within instead of bothering to talk to other people. It is not that I am shy. In fact, it is the total opposite, especially when I have good friends around me. In a club, you will likely find me dancing like this:

BUT, I have some inhibitions to start and hold a conversation with people, especially with strangers or friends I don’t know so well. My brain is like: What is the point to talk? What shall I even say to him/her? And I am literally coming up with nothing and just stay quiet or don’t engage (also in group settings)…
When I was starting running Khan, my social abilities, and the responses from the people around me dramatically improved, but it never got rid of this inhibition. Well… At least when I was sober. I actually wrote about that in my 6-month review of Khan:

Longterm Review of Khan

When I drink alcohol, I feel like Khan is taking over. Like my consciousness is getting turned off (due to the normal effect of such toxic) and I am acting only how my subconscious wants it, which is trained to be a Khan.

When I drink something, my social abilities get turned to the maximum. It is quite unbelievable. From a cool, but chill dude, I very often turn into a complete KHAN, taking over a whole room of people, making out with multiple chicks in one night. It is a bit sad because I don’t even really know what I do or how I seduce because I cannot remember. I am just so in the moment, spreading energy and fun and suddenly I am 2 inches in front of this beautiful girl going for the kiss. Of course, it could be that also the people around me when drunk are just more open to my energy and vibe. But certainly, if I had the same energy and carefreeness I have while intoxicated, I could easily sweep them away with emotions and wake them up from their slumber. I just don’t understand while it is so easy, while drunk, and so hard when I am in my normal state of consciousness, both while running Khan. And especially, while I have so much trouble innitating a fun and emotionally engaging conversation with a stranger like I easily do while drunk.

It could have to do with some limiting beliefs or a lack of confidence, so I tried combining Khan + Godlike Masculinity + Ares + New Beginnings in a custom, which worked WONDERS by giving me the biggest self-confidence in my life (I love it and it made so many things easier!) BUT made me very STOIC… Especially while combining that with QL, I am not only stoic now but also logical and just want to put my nose in a book all day lol.

So, I was wondering do you guys experience something similar? Did you find any modules or module combinations helping with that (Thinking about “Panther”)? Or have some advice for me?

I thought about creating another custom with Khan + Ares + Godlike Masculinity for the confidence and on top of that adding Daredevil and maybe Panther to counteract the side-effects and really get my social game in check (especially starting and holding a conversation). What do you think? SaintSovereign or Fire if you are reading this, I would also highly appreciate your input on that.

[Baphomet]

Have you tried Limit Destroyer for any length of time?

[friday]

Thank you Neurokinetic! Very nice to hear from you!

No, I have not but I would certainly include this module when I build another custom. However, I have dissolved a lot of limits consciously and with other methods, and also did 3 or 4 months of Khan St1. Will LD even work on that problem? If it is something from the past, it could probably be some form of karma or very early deep trauma that I can’t remember hence why I choose New Beginnings, but I am not so sure if that is the case. But it could also be just something on the surface area, like that I just haven’t developed that skill.

It is weird, but it just often feels like I don’t have the energy to initiate the conversation on that level. Like that it would be too strenuous for me to do. And on top of that I have NO IDEA what to talk about when in that situation…
Khan is more focused on social dominance, so Khan + Daredevil could do the trick but it could also be that this might be completely unnecessary and that problem could be fixed through a clear intent while running Khan… and maybe adding some other modules.

[SubliminalUser]

Try Dragon Reborn + Khan?

[Baphomet]

Always a pleasure to talk with you brother

The way I understand limit destroyer is that it removes the limiting beliefs. All the healing programs have their own methodology behind them in how they do what they do. Alcohol as a “social lubricant” removes the feeling of “I can’t”. In my opinion, Limit Destroyer is the same function. It’s purpose is specifically to remove any limiting beliefs of “I can’t because…”. In that way, I think if you’re trying to achieve that kind of off-the-top confidence, LDU would be the best option for achieving it.

[Yazooneh]

Khan got you bro. Things I learned on khan as a man coming from your exact same space, formerly able to party like a orangutan but conversations just were too out of my skill zone if it was one v one.

I try to wonder what they’re like, assuming the things I thought out loud and asking if they’re correct. From there you should have an idea of what type of person she is and can work from there. If you thought for a second that you’d fuck her, you’re interested in what she does in life

[aaa]

My impression, at the time you go… what is the point, I don’t know what to say… your too much in your head and not enjoying yourself/others.

How do you feel when your brain is doing that?

[pacman]

My brain is like: What is the point to talk? What shall I even say to him/her? And I am literally coming up with nothing and just stay quiet or don’t engage (also in group settings)…

Seems like your ‘monkey chatter’ is steering you. Why not go back to Khan ? Maybe longer on Khan will erradicate that problem.

If its a problem that you had from a very long time…its going to take some time to remove those patterns. The good part of it is that you are aware of it and can identify it.

The other question is…
did you stop taking khan actions after you stopped running khan? like approaching and chatting women up?

[COWolfe]

I’ve got the same issue. I’d like to see them do a conversation starter module. I think I’ve gotten over the social anxiety that caused me to be like that in the first place, but I still can’t find a way to initiate socialization with a stranger that feels anything but forced and awkward. When I find myself in a good conversation, it just seems to happen, and I can’t really remember how it happened. I’d really like to have some unconscious competence with that.

[friday]

The way I understand limit destroyer is that it removes the limiting beliefs. All the healing programs have their own methodology behind them in how they do what they do. Alcohol as a “social lubricant” removes the feeling of “I can’t”. In my opinion, Limit Destroyer is the same function. It’s purpose is specifically to remove any limiting beliefs of “I can’t because…”. In that way, I think if you’re trying to achieve that kind of off-the-top confidence, LDU would be the best option for achieving it.

Thank you so much for that profound explanation @Baphomet. That actually makes a lot of sense! Have you tried Limit Destroyer personally?

Try Dragon Reborn + Khan?

Dragon Reborn + Khan would definitely be a powerful stack but I don’t want to drop any of my customs right now for that. I would love to try the Dragon Reborn Ultima though haha. Do you think Dragon Reborn (Q version) has Limit Destroyer in it?

your too much in your head and not enjoying yourself/others.

How do you feel when your brain is doing that?

Very true. Especially with my QL custom now this is definitely more pronounced than ever.
But your post gave me a realization. I have a deep need to feel loved by the people around me. Not surprisingly, as I have Leo as my Sun Sign. On top of that, I am very empathic so I very quickly notice what people think about me and how my status is in a group just by subtle body language and gestures. On booze, I probably just don’t care so much what other people think of me and how my status is in the group. I don’t hold back. I don’t overthink. I don’t care. And I drop all notion to say anything “good” in general.

Why not go back to Khan ? Maybe longer on Khan will erradicate that problem.

I am on Khan currently. In fact I am running a Terminus Khan custom for two months. And by going all over this, it is very clear that Khan is already working on that issue. In fact, I had some crazy reconciliation yesterday.

I’ve got the same issue. I’d like to see them do a conversation starter module. I think I’ve gotten over the social anxiety that caused me to be like that in the first place, but I still can’t find a way to initiate socialization with a stranger that feels anything but forced and awkward. When I find myself in a good conversation, it just seems to happen, and I can’t really remember how it happened. I’d really like to have some unconscious competence with that.

WOW that is EXACTLY what I am talking about. What are you running currently? With all that said above that it is likely some sort of limiting belief or anxiety, Daredevil would likely help with that really well.

[SubliminalUser]

Do you think Dragon Reborn (Q version) has Limit Destroyer in it?

@friday I think Dragon Reborn has technology that exceeds our current understanding and is not describable in terms of the other subs before it. I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s 100% original scripting.

[COWolfe]

WOW that is EXACTLY what I am talking about. What are you running currently? With all that said above that it is likely some sort of limiting belief or anxiety, Daredevil would likely help with that really wel

I’m running my Ascension based custom at the moment. I’ll give Daredevil a try at some point, but I think a module just to get past that sticking point would be great.

[Azriel]

@friday! Good to hear from you again. Hope your detox went well

I have a deep need to feel loved by the people around me. Not surprisingly, as I have Leo as my Sun Sign. On top of that, I am very empathic so I very quickly notice what people think about me and how my status is in a group just by subtle body language and gestures. On booze, I probably just don’t care so much what other people think of me and how my status is in the group. I don’t hold back. I don’t overthink. I don’t care. And I drop all notion to say anything “good” in general.

This is spot on, logically it may help to understand that the highest status thing in the world is authenticity.

You can’t be emotional reactive or concerned about status when your authentic. Personally this understanding gives me permission to just engage. And it’s way easier then worrying.

As social animals biologically attuned to status, when our brains perceives we have status-it gives us permission to be ourselfs, and when it perceives we don’t, it can inhibit us -for damage control. The irony is the a circular loop system-so by being yourself in any situation and not holding back -you’ll start to experience extremely high status.

As a conscious effort /experiment you could mess around with the following-stop looking for cues from others for how to act or what to do, even if your so sensitive and attuned you perceive something-choose to act/speak anyway. I bet your a highly calibrated person socially, even if your quite at times, and would have no concern of doing something uncalibrated if you just let it rip.

like every other human being, you probably have a concern for looking good and fitting in at times.

When your drunk the visceral experience and overflow of your self expression overrides that concern. Also you may simply feel love when your drunk to the point where you don’t need, want, or expect in from others so you stop looking for cues from others for how you can act. That’s like the switch for you to go beast mode.

You may just also get into a very logical state of mind, and might benefit from practicing turning the noggin off with stuff like improv, or some physical activity/meditation before socializing.

One random weird thing that helped me

Chew Gum-it activates the part of your brain related to speaking, so it makes it easier to go from not speaking to talking if your chewing gum

I was at this conference once. And they were taking comments from the audience, and this guy got up and was like " I don’t know what I’m going to say but it is going to be important" And he said it super confidently. My first thought was ’ this guys a dick and people are going to think this is weird’ Then there was silence, everyone laughed and then cheered like crazy and he got off stage lmao. After hearing that I realized when you just own whatever your saying it doesn’t fucking matter.

Whatever the case Dragon Reborn will help tremendously with this, I’ve been running some loops this week and I find myself more inclined and interested to speak more, care about conversations more, and be more in the flow of them, and have been talking to strangers (attractive woman) much more than usual, I’m even going out of my way to do it. This is a large departure from my general behavior on Emperor custom.

I relate to the issue your speaking about a lot in my past and I no longer have this as particular sticking point. Subs and some of the stuff above helped.So as always-when I say anything that sounds like suggestions/advicy/preachy -if something resonates great , even not please throw out!

[friday]

Azriel, I love you! I did not cry but I was close lol. Your analysis was SPOT ON. Thank you, and also all the others here in this thread, for taking the time and helping me

[aaa]

@Azriel is on fire !! Booyah!

[Vesper]

I feel like you I had the exact same thing even before running khan.

Like this one time a few months, I went to a party and this beautiful girl was there, thing is I didn’t want to drink at that party (Why, no clue). So anyway we talk and play beer pong (I drinked water instead tho) and then we go to this closed it was me, my friend and the girl (At that I was so bad with girls) and then I remember touching her and she said “daddy” anyway my friend said we should hook up and that’s when my old virgin mindset kick in and I was so awkward at that moment that I couldn’t even go for the kiss even though her face was not even a inch away from my face.

Anyway later on she leaves and I get sad so I start drinking, instantly like if I got possesses by the gods of seduction I go up and strike a conversation with this other attractive girl give her the best massage of her life (Her words not mine aha) and then I think you could guess the rest of it:)

This also happened to me when I went on vacation to a club. It’s like something magical in a way I still I can’t explain how it happened. So I go up to this club and usually I’m the type person that just can’t approach people in a club even if it’s just to make friends. Anyway, so I decide to take some shots of whisky hoping it would help and instantly the gods of seduction (I’m calling them this now lmao) come back and not only did I have fun with girls but I made a group of friends who I always hanged out with on that vacation, it went from just me clubbing to over my whole group of friends there filling up the club. Honestly was the best vacation my life.

It’s insane to think about it, I’ve every “social” supplement or “drug” you could think of none of them helped the way alcohol did. Like every time I take alcohol and go to a social event, it’s guaranteed that I will either get laid or make more friends and have fun.

P.S not a alcoholic, the only time I drink is at social events.

[friday]

Wouldn’t it be great to have a custom that induces exactly these “Gods of Seduction” as you call it haha (I love the naming) without having to drink alcohol

Did somebody run Daredevil here and could give us a little review ?

[Vesper]

What do you think would happen if someone ran Dragon Reborn with QL?

[Hermit]

Whatever the case Dragon Reborn will help tremendously with this, I’ve been running some loops this week and I find myself more inclined and interested to speak more, care about conversations more, and be more in the flow of them, and have been talking to strangers (attractive woman) much more than usual, I’m even going out of my way to do it. This is a large departure from my general behavior on Emperor custom.

What Custom are you using that has Dragon Reborn within it? @Azriel, can you please share everything you have observed in regards to Dragon Reborn, I’d greatly appreciated your effort to do so and will always return value wherever I can.

[Vesper]

For me meditation was actually the issue for me. I used to meditate before social events until I realized whenever I do it I become so anti social in a inexplicable way. So I stopped meditating and it really improved my social abilities.