Played Emperor & Executive the previous night as well as first thing in the morning.
I woke up in a very happy mood and was eager to get work. My usual morning grogginess wasn’t present, and that was strange.
At the moment i work in a truss shop as a builder. I have much bigger plans though and I am actively working on becoming a freelance copywriter.
I walked in with a sense of excitement, I just wanted to get to the table and start building. However, I didn’t have the plates to build my trusses, so I took it upon myself to go grab them myself and get to work.
Upon walking back to my table, I noticed my boss watching me with a look of surprise on his face. It is unlike me to be so upbeat and quick to get started in the morning, and I could tell he noticed.
I found myself in a calm yet energetic state of mind and I felt confident in my ability to get my work done without the usual stress and worry of “am I doing enough”.
My confidence was through the roof. It’s quite surprising really as I used to struggle hard with “social anxiety”.
I’ve gotten much better over the past 2 years and today was truly a breakthrough moment. I was saying hi to people, actively participating in conversations, I even made friends with a new co worker and helped point him in the right direction.
I felt a small sense of imposter syndrome, like my mind was at war with itself.
I would describe it like my subconscious was yelling at me saying “This is unlike you, why are you so happy and confident, you’re supposed to be self conscious and tired all the time”.
I was able to easily ignore those negative thoughts and shift my focus back to more positive thoughts.
After work, I played my first loop of primal seduction.
I came home to see my step brother and his girlfriend were over. So after a quick shower, I grabbed myself a glass of wine, and went outside to say hi.
My whole family was outside, we all talked and had a good time. Strangely enough, I wasn’t as self conscious as usual. (Not in my head)
I am a very analytical person so I am very much aware of my body language, my vocal tonality, my facial expressions the way I speak and how I make others feel etc.
I found myself present in the moment. Although I still had these thoughts, they were much quieter and faster. So they didn’t take me out of the conversation into a self reflective state if that makes sense.
Instead I could maintain eye contact, actively listen and still maintain awareness of these key social dynamics.
Throughout the night I maintained my joyful, confident mood and found it easier than normal to just let go and be myself.
Usually I’m more reserved around my family when drinking and “partying” as I don’t want to make a fool of myself in front them.
But today was different, we played some throwback hits and I was singing along and having a good time without worrying about if I’m coming across as awkward or annoying.
I was cracking jokes left and right. I was actually starting conversations as opposed to being the usual “fly on the wall” watching others.
Another thing, I noticed his girlfriend looked at me a lot, especially when laughing.
(Just to be clear: I would never make a move on any of my friends or brothers girlfriends. Nor would I actively try and seduce them for self gratifying purposes.)
She talked to me a lot that night and we got along quite well. Mind you I have only met her a few times and didn’t know her all that well until tonight.
This may sound strange, but I felt a warm feeling around my stomach area while talking to her. Especially at the beginning of the night. It was comforting and made me feel less inhibited.
Not sure if this is a sacral chakra thing, maybe it’s just the white claw I drank, I don’t know. All I know is I felt it.
While there was no romantic connection or “spark between us” I could tell she found me attractive and she was clearly drawn to me for some reason.
Overall GREAT first day. Maybe it’s placebo, maybe it’s working. While likely a mixture of both, I’m happy with my results so far.
In the future I’ll continue to add more entries to the site.
I’ll be adding in Quantum Limitless to the playlist next.
Feel free to comment or leave any questions you have. I’m excited to connect with this great community of people and I’m all for helping each other reach our desired goals
So if you’re interested in my journey…stay tuned and thanks for reading