Emperor Black + Ecstasy of Freedom (EOG St1)

Journals - Major Programs
#1

Welcome to another Emperor Black journal. There are many like it, but this is my own.

Today is Day 1. Ran 3 minutes of each. Emperor Black first, then EOG.

I don’t know what I’ll share here as I dive into the deep dark places, but the idea going into this cycle is to:

  • have EOG St1 dig up the deep-rooted poverty programming while Emperor Black helps me work through it with the goal of unleashing my creativity around wealth-creation, and magnifying my abundance mindset
  • use EB’s monk mode to establish useful habits so I naturally progress with my fitness, my business, and my martial skillset
  • reestablish spiritual practices I’ve been inconsistent with
  • dive deep into the dark recesses of my psyche and embrace the work of unraveling things that need to be let go of and integrating those aspects that have been hidden away

That sounds like a tall order for one cycle, but we’ll see what happens. I’m challenging my assumption that “change is hard”.

Anyway, I’m ready to face some things that I haven’t yet and am ready to embrace whatever else comes up out of the deep.

Shortly after my loops, a line in a movie triggered me to investigate expressions of Yin…

  • “Soft and as quick as shadows we must be.”
  • triggered ideas for tactics to take down a more formidable force
  • which led me to thinking of the qualities and forms of water
  • and resulted in a new insight about stillness

The impulse to practice martial arts and meditation was strong when that string of thoughts happened, but I didn’t pull the trigger. The feeling of that insight hasn’t gone away completely, but it feels like the momentum isn’t as powerful now.

Going forward, I don’t say “no” to or overthink the impulses my intuition serves up.

I have a feeling that there’s magic in those moments that I’ve been missing out on.

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#2

A couple lines from a book that inspired me this morning:

“Because a man must choose. Therein lieth his strength: the power of his decisions.”

“Even more difficult is defining a path for oneself. He who maketh no choice is dead in the eyes of the Lord, though he go on breathing and walking the streets.”

Made a deal this morning with someone who isn’t a friend and who’s annoyed me in the past.

Part of me wanted to say “no” because of those annoyances, but another, calmer notion came up: I wouldn’t be saying no to them…I’d be saying no to the flow of money and abundance.

Then I took responsibility for getting annoyed in the first place and let it go.

No sense of recon today so far. Energy is high, and focus is decent.

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#3

Ran 5 minute loops today. EOG first this time. Obvious head sensations around the 4 minute mark for EOG, no obvious changes while listening to EB. Wasn’t meditating during, just drinking coffee and reading.

Energy was good upon waking this morning, even though sleep was rough last night. Immediately took care of a mess I left yesterday and made a mental note to not slack like that anymore, regardless of how tired I feel…cleaning up a mess isn’t how I want to start my days.

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#4

“The brave, however, set afire that which was old and, even at the cost of great internal suffering, abandon everything, including God, and continue onward.”

Finding instruction, inspiration, and insights from the things that enter my awareness more and more the past few days.

Before I read this line in the book I’m reading, I’d sat down at the end of the day yesterday and revisited the question asked in my dream: did you defeat your father?

I wrote. I pondered. I felt. Then I avoided.

And one of the first things that came up on social media when I went to seek distraction was: a video of a grown man connecting with his father for the first time since he was a child.

I turned off the phone and closed my eyes to meditate…and passed out. My couch is comfy af, lol.

When I woke up, I pinged my mind and heart for any new insights or feelings about it. None came up, so I got up and did stuff.

While I showered, a realization began to form.

Rebelling against the father is the same as allowing him to control you; you have no independence.

“Defeating the father” is a redefining of that connection so it becomes a willful one.

Destruction is only a part of it, and necessary for the construction of something new that allows the soul to bloom.

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#5

“We stay poor until we’ve learned all the lessons poverty has to teach.”

:face_with_monocle: :open_book:

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#6

Had my first obvious wealth dream last night…

There was extravagance everywhere. Everything from the building structure to the tile on the floor was ornate and intricately detailed. I remember walking through the place – which was so huge the archways seemed to be a few stories high – and though I was apparently wearing fashionable clothes and carrying an expensive looking bag, both which allowed me to blend in, I felt out of place…but I didn’t show it on my face or in my movements.

I consciously thought to myself that “I belonged”, had no reason to feel uneasy being there, and relaxed more into the environment.

The women were beautiful and abundant and wanted my attention. And the men, although they had that competitive fire in their eyes, they respected me – apparently we’d played a game beforehand that went well.

I woke up feeling neutral about the idea of being so wealthy it seemed like living on another planet.

EOG St1 seems to be doing some thing.

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#7

Pulled into the parking lot to pick up some groceries and heard that familiar Christmas time sound in the air…

The ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding of the Salvation Army bell ringing.

Non-stop. No breaks. No lulls. Just a consistent, urgent, dinging.

It cut right through the closed windows and podcast I was listening to like a freshly sharpened katana through tatami. And the sound followed me as clear as crystal all the way to my parking spot.

Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding…

I wondered, “Is the strategy to get me to pay her to stop ringing that bell?”

This probably makes me sound like a Grinch. And in that moment, I can’t say I felt the 'ole holiday “giving spirit.”

But what I felt in that moment was actually very neutral.

I had a deep wish for the bell to stop ringing and for the lady ringing it to not be there, but I didn’t feel any ill will towards her. She was just doing what she thought was a good act…hopefully…I’m sure old ladies never steal.

Here’s why I’m writing this all out…

I didn’t walk more than 10 feet away from the car towards the entrance where she was located conspicuously in the middle of the entrance walkway…when her bell stopped ringing.

The silence was golden, but I was ready for the ding-ding-ding to start up any second.

Then I noticed another thing: she was packing up to leave.

I thanked her silently as I walked by, but I didn’t think anything more of it.

Then, something similar happened AGAIN…

Pulled up to a drive-thru of my go-to burger joint about an hour after the dinging stopped. I came to a stop about one car length passed a young dude in a hoodie wrapped in a red and white checkered blanket sitting on an inverted bucket holding a cardboard sign: “Will Rap For Food.”

I studied the dude through the side mirror and wrestled with a knee-jerk feeling to give him something.

It was cold outside. He was in a tough spot. I felt for him. But something seemed off, and I couldn’t put my finger on it.

And like smoke that clears away with a gust of wind, that giving feeling disappeared.

I wanted him not to be there anymore.

Several seconds later, he stood up. Put his backpack on. Then walked away with his bucket.

Coincidence? I don’t believe in those.

Clearly, this wasn’t a happy story about holiday cheer and merry-making…it felt a little darker, but I don’t know what to make of it yet.

Maybe I was projecting something dark within myself onto them. Maybe I was picking up on something unknowable through the 5 senses alone about them and responding to it. I’m not sure, but whatever it was, there was ZERO overt interaction between me and these two people who responded to what I thought/felt within only a handful of seconds it seemed.

I wanted to document it before I have a chance to brush it off and not attribute this somehow to Emperor Black.

Tomorrow will be day 3 of listening.

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#8

None of us are making it out alive.

And we can’t take our stuff with us either.

What will all the fame, status and wealth matter in five hundred years?

Everything in Time will die.

I added RICH to my stack today. Only 3 minutes to mitigate recon risk.

Got an intuitive nudge that EOG St1 + RICH would work beautifully for me and the wealth manifestations would become more and more obvious as EOG removes the limits.

In fact, I got an immediate idea to throw one of my ideas on a T-shirt right after listening. That’s not normal for me…so, it’s an instant RICH result.

And I’m going to do it. See if anything happens because…why not.

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#9

Well, I know more now about the options for creating and selling tshirts than I did an hour ago.

It’s awesome that the information to learn how to do almost anything is readily available. Here’s one straight forward approach that came up straight away from a simple search: How to Start a Tshirt Business with Little to No Money Down

I still might make a tshirt for myself, but there’s no way I’d want to run a tshirt business.

Everything takes time and energy to produce fruit, and this was a new shiny idea that was fun to think about for a minute and provided some distraction.

It did plant a seed in my mind about learning how to build a successful brand though, but that’ll have to wait.

First step is achieving a higher level of success with my current business model instead of starting over from scratch.

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#10

repetitio mater studiorum…repetition is the mother of all learning

Woke up after only a few hours of sleep and the first things I thought about was making money. (Thanks RICH.)

There must be a million ways to make a million dollars, so I wonder why that money isn’t in my bank account yet?

Well, my mind served up the answer: I simply lack the necessary knowledge, skills, or beliefs to create that reality. My action-taking could use more action-taking too.

There’s no sugar coating the obviousness of the truth. It is what it is.

After I got out of bed and made some coffee, I went back and reviewed the fundamentals: the market I’m targeting, the pain I’m solving, and the offer I’m making.

The next step is the repetition of reaching out and opening conversations – which is its own skill set to practice and get good at.

That’s it.

It’s formulaic.

The magic is the practice.

A thought that I keep coming back to is: why am I doing this?

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#11

I’ve been questioning a lot of things the past few days and feeling profoundly restless. At first I thought EOG might be causing the sense of recon, but I’m not only questioning my business and financial goals. I’m questioning everything in my life it seems, and the sense of certainty about my choices is all but non-existent at the moment.

Realized my subconscious is strongly expressing this part of Emperor Black script:

  • Profound spiritual deep-dive to discover who you are and what you want in life. In the absence of all, your truth becomes obvious.

It’s uncomfortable, to say the least. My truth isn’t obvious yet (after 4 loops and minimal spiritual practice), but I’m committed to uncovering/recognizing it.

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#12

I almost decided to fast today instead of heading out to the store to restock some food, so I think the solitude scripting is starting to kick in hard, lol.

It seems like there’s another factor that’s contributing to that feeling of wanting to be isolated too: an increased sense of vulnerability.

I think it has to do with the fact that more of who I am is meshing with the mask I wear around others, and a misguided part of me thinks that those parts of who I am is weak – which isn’t completely wrong, I’ve made many weak responses to challenges in my life.

Anyway, switching gears to be out in public wasn’t too hard, but I had to consciously do it. It didn’t take much…closed my eyes, took a breathe, imagined how it would feel, then walked out the door. That’s it.

I began to feel more and more grounded as I walked. It was dreary and overcast outside, but I still noticed the vibrant quality of certain trees, the flowers, and certain people. It was instantly uplifting to be outside, and the sense of vulnerability I had was gone.

  • Develop a rich ability of mindfulness — living in the moment, focusing on the “now,” and being aware of all things around you

Forgot that that was part of the Emperor Black script. It works.

Got a sample of this part of the script while I was out and about too:

  • Generate a profound, incredibly potent energetic and physical aura of sexiness.

As I walked towards the entrance of the store, a young, decently attractive woman trying to get me to stop and talk to her asked me, “Are you a model?”

“No, are you?” I didn’t stop walking towards the entrance.

“No. But you look like a model,” she said.

I said, “Thanks,” and continued inside the store.

I didn’t put much stock into it because she was trying to get me to sign up for something I probably didn’t want to sign up for, but it was too obvious to dismiss. She didn’t have to take that approach, but it was the first thing that caught her attention so there’s some merit to it.

Then, as I walked out of a second store, a young guy wearing a suit stepped into my path several feet in front of me and said, “Hey, cool guy.”

“Hey.” I didn’t stop or slow my stride.

“Can I ask you a question?” he asked as he stepped to one side.

“Sure.” I didn’t stop or slow my stride.

He noticed that I wasn’t slowing and rushed to his table to grab a tablet, then started saying, “Have you ever heard of…” and I don’t remember the last couple words.

“Sorry bud, time’s up,” I said looking back over my shoulder and held up the peace sign.

That probably makes me sound like an ass to some people. That’s ok.

The point of sharing that was that the first thing he was drawn to, and pointed out, was his impression of my appearance. Same as the young woman only 15 minutes earlier.

I wasn’t dressed any differently than I normally am, and I don’t normally get comments like that even from people selling stuff, so I’m chalking it up to energy and aura.

There were also a couple reminders for me from both of those interactions:

  • you only have a few seconds to interrupt a person’s pattern/routine and gain their attention, don’t waste it
  • sometimes the timing is off, regardless of your approach; it’s nothing personal
  • you’re not entitled to anything, even if you give people value; better to qualify them right away and not waste your time/energy on the wrong person
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#13

There’s no such thing as

  • “wasting” Time
  • “making” Time
  • “spending” Time
  • or “saving” Time

It’s a mislabeling of perception.

You don’t waste Time…you squander Attention.
You don’t make Time…you allocate Attention.
You don’t spend Time…you invest Attention.
You don’t save Time…you limit Attention.

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#14

I think I’m reaching the limits of my discomfort with my current life and identity…

The things that used to bring me quick pleasure (and provide a welcome distraction) seem to be drying up.

Now even while I try to distract myself, I catch glimpses of what an awesome version of me would be doing instead, but there’s a fear that I’m not good enough, or don’t have what it takes to realize it, or that I don’t deserve it because of some things I’ve done.

It feels like the precipice of change and I’m either going to become, or be overcome.

A part of me has to die…and it’s not going quietly.

That probably sounds a little dramatic, but it does feel deeply intense.

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#15

“He who rides a tiger is afraid to dismount.”

The safer option is just to NOT ride the tiger in the first place, right?

Right – and that’s what I’ve been doing. Totally avoiding the ride.

Except that’s not the choice the awesome version of me chose. I know it.

I can feel the tension in the air. I can feel it all the way down in my plumbs (here’s a vid to that reference for a good laugh).

And laughter is exactly what I’d hear if I told anyone what the idea is in the first place, so that ain’t happening. The whole concept seems too farfetched from my current point on the timeline. And it scares me.

But if the vision was too small it wouldn’t motivate me enough and this definitely would, so this is exactly the kind of result I wanted in running Emperor Black.

I didn’t get the “nose-to-grindstone” effect in terms of work output. I did get it in spades for doing research into new topics and going deeper into topics I was already familiar with…all with the intent of understanding myself more deeply.

Throughout this cycle, I had several new insights into what (and why) I’ve been holding certain things back. And when certain themes I’d been exploring came into awareness, it seemed like they slapped me upside the head with the obviousness of the insight it produced.

I know that’s vague, but I have to flesh it out a bit more before I speak on it.

On day two of washout and will add ROM on the next cycle of Emperor Black. Maybe it’ll crank the “knowing my purpose” scripting up enough to break through whatever limits might be there.

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#16

Dreamt of being with a perfectly curvy, black-haired, tan-skinned beauty last night. We laid together, and I felt so grounded and fulfilled. When I looked at her it made my heart swell. She asked, “Why are you looking at me like that,” with a slight smile on her face.

So I said, “Because I’m happy…not because of you. But you are a result of it.”

And I woke up just as the dream started to get good. :laughing:

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#17

Woah, crazy good dream!!!

Big results happening for you internally

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#18

Today is the last day of washing out before I introduce Revelation of Mind tomorrow…and I’m really looking forward to the unfolding experience and what the combo of EB + ROM can do. I expect it to be awesome, in that I’ll experience more awe and flow day-to-day.

Had a surge of relentless focus yesterday in taking care of a lot of things I’d ignored the last two weeks, and it felt different than other titles that aim to drive up productivity. The energy felt smooth and consistent, with a seemingly endless reserve to direct as I willed. Felt closer to the type of productivity I got from running GLM as opposed to Executive or LE.

  • Express your internal power and strength in a healthy, but powerful and dominant manner, refusing to allow anyone to cross your boundaries.

My patience for tolerating willful ignorance that shouts from the rooftops (especially in my direction) is almost completely gone. One of my family members found out yesterday. :sweat_smile:

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#19

First loop of The Revelation of Mind yesterday morning. Ran the full 15 minutes, followed by 3 minutes of Emperor Black.

My first, second and third impressions were that I felt high. Not in a stoned kind of way, but more like a micro-dosing some mushrooms way – it’s an effect from ROM because I didn’t experience anything remotely close to that on the previous cycle with EB.

I spent most of the day traveling with a friend, but noticed some immediate results:

  • packing a mid-sized SUV, I was able to tap into some master-level Tetris-fu to help pack in a LOT of extra stuff that needed to make the trip (not my stuff), where my friend doubted the possibility; I just “saw” how it could be done, asked for some string, and made it happen
  • while singing, I noticed I could actually feel the level of relaxation in my throat which allowed me to play with my range a little easier; also, I didn’t have anxiety this time which probably contributed to the increased awareness of tension
  • the music and singing connected and resonated with me more deeply on an emotional level than before and there were moments of pure joy and pleasure, and others where I would’ve cried if I’d let it out
  • my friend said I seemed more “in the moment”, and when I asked her why she said that she didn’t know how to explain it…said that I seemed very calm and present, not really distracted by anything.
  • remembered a book that was recommended awhile back called The Magic of Thinking Big that I’ve had stored on my phone for months; started listening to it and it’s like it was written just for me…started with talking about belief and thinking small being the main reason people fail to achieve more (can concur)

I’m staying with family for the holidays, so it’ll be interesting to see what happens.

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#20

Second day of ROM + EB this cycle.

Went to bed early, had vivid dreams, and woke up before the sun without an alarm feeling rested. First time this has happened on its own in a few weeks.

Started a meditation practice last night that I’ve put off for two months. It’s a necessary step for my evolution, and it requires commitment and perseverance in order to bare fruit, like anything that’s difficult, so I avoided it. Emperor Black got me to reevaluate my choices the past couple weeks and examine my self, but it seems ROM helped me actually sit and do the practice.

And when I got interrupted mid-meditation and requested to go flip a circuit breaker back on out in the cold af garage, I felt surprisingly calm and flowed easily into the task and back into the meditation after I handled it.

Running EB and now ROM, I realize that I process and integrate spiritual titles really well compared to pure wealth titles. I’ve had the nudge to run Alchemist for months and months now, but I put it off because I thought, “I need to become financially free before I focus on spiritual practice,” which is wrong thinking, for me.

What I need is to feel aligned and congruent with who I am, what I’m doing, and why. Then the money will come because I’m not obsessing over it (stuck in scarcity thinking – part of my recent lesson in choosing partners).

In fact, an opportunity opened up to me yesterday to help someone sell their high-ticket offer in the financial market (which sounds awesome), and after going through some of their material and a quick conversation, the next step of evaluating their stats should happen shortly – the holiday in the US & UK may delay things.

This was the easiest opening of a pathway I’ve ever experienced…and I blame EB for helping me become better aligned within and understanding myself better (and also EOG St1 for removing blockages, too).

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