No. I have sex with other women too. It’s equal. And yes, we very much do love each other. Have for twenty years.
1 Like
Dude! Fuck yeah 
Not fish in a barrel… I’m not a part of that scene but I’d imagine competition can be even more fierce or people could be more choosy than normal because it’s about sex. A bit extreme of an example, but surely a smelly homeless couple couldn’t just roll up and get play 
Nice one
1 Like
There really IS no competition. Not like in the bar scene or when you’re looking for a relationship where there’s only one winner per desirable person.
LOL I see 
I was trying to give the maximum props possible. That’s really counterintuitive!
1 Like
Oh, I’m taking the props. Maybe it would be helpful to start thinking about the whole thing that way.
Anyway, for now it’s enough that I crossed that long standing mental line. That’s a HUGE victory for me.
2 Likes
Having dealt with the new breed of homeless WAY more than anyone should, they get plenty of play with each other.
2 Likes
Oh god lmao I regret saying anything now.
2 Likes
You made me think of it, you pay the price. 
2 Likes
**6/5/23 STAGE 3 CYCLE 4 WEEK 1**
- I’ve been thinking more about the party this weekend. I did feel the push to take action that stage three is supposed to have. Also it let me know about my failure each time I wanted to do it but didn’t.
A big part of my hesitation was, or seemed to be, that I just didn’t know how to do it. I mean I had no concept of how to walk up to a woman, start a conversation, and guide things to the bedroom. It seemed insurmountable and highly confusing to me.
I’ve actually been with quite a few women in my time, but it always seemed to just happen when I really wasn’t trying or thinking about it. Either they initiated or we were talking and all of a sudden we were making out.
I figured out that I was in a situation where I could be direct, and it worked.
Another part of it was a lot more basic. I had almost zero success with girls until I was just a few days shy of eighteen. Matter of fact, my first few attempts to get a “girlfriend” in Elementary school ended with me not only getting rejected, but rejected harshly.
I think that those few experiences got a very negative association cemented in my mind.
That is, approaching girl = mortifying humiliation. That lasted a long time. I believe that I started working through it on DR and got further on Khan st 1. By that point I didn’t feel visceral terror at the prospect. Maybe the “I don’t know what to do” thing was that part of my subconscious’ slats line of defense against me changing that perception. It had to be changed internally and now I have to change it outwardly through actually doing it.
But I did it. It was in an easy environment, but for the first time in my life I approached with intent and made it happen.
It seems to me that the sex party type of thing is a good, call it, training ground, for me. It’s helping me to change that “approach woman = humiliation” impression to “approach woman = sex, or at least a more positive response”.
3 Likes
-
Genesis feels really good to run. Hard to describe, but I just felt happy after my loops tonight.
-
I went for a good ride today. Then I ran into a sudden hailstorm at about sixty MPH. That was interesting. I have little bruises on my face.
I am quickly getting my skills and comfort with riding back. -
Tonight I got some really strong spontaneous visualizations of having achieved all of my goals at the end of this run.
4 Likes
I’ve gotten deja-vu moments where I would visualize something or dream of something and later on it manifests
I’ve never had the EXACT thing I’ve visualized manifest, but close. I don’t often remember dreaming, so I don’t know if it’s happened that way or not.
1 Like
-
So. BDLM huh? I’m curious to see people’s results with that one. Unfortunately I’m going to have more important things to focus on for the foreseeable future to use my second program slot for that.
-
I’ve been keeping up on the listening to the writing podcast and putting one or more events on the timeline for my slowly evolving novel every work night.
It seems that Genesis really is guiding me toward writing. Interesting. That’s the first thing I focused on and took any action on back I’m high school, but it fell by the wayside. Now it’s back.
2 Likes
- The first week of cycle 4 is almost over. That means it’s time to start designing stage 4. I’m going to be on that one for six cycles, so better get it right. I am kind of holding off until the last week just in case STKS becomes available in time, but if it doesn’t, I will of course get it re made when it does. That could actually make a good comparison of results.
This first version really goes all out on the results modules as far as seduction goes.
- Khan St 4 core
- Alexander’s Play
- King’s Radience
- Power Talk
- Dragon Tongue
- Stress Displacement
- Stone like
- Edge of falling
- Hegemon
10 seducers gaze
11 Eyes of Zenith
12 Cosmic Navigator
13 Furious Ascent
14 Potentiator
15 Voice Master
16 Focused Arousal
17 Instant Spark
18 Panther
19 Sexual Manifestation
20 Mosaic
That should make it a fun run.
2 Likes
You bringing memories back with this one. In grade 2 we started calligraphy style writing(or whatever you call it) using pencils. I never lifted my pencil once so it slowly faded and casted a shadow on every word I wrote. The kids in class would laugh at my writing but at the end of 2nd grade my teacher asked me if she could hold on to my books because she had never experienced anything as beautiful which made me feel proud and appreciated. My parents never gave a damn because they were the abusers in my case. I’m currently on Khan St3. Great journal 
2 Likes
Thanks. Yeah, I had some very special parents too. It really does effect your whole life until you realize what was really going on.
I’ll share what was probably the biggest revelation from my DR run.
My parents were fucked up long before I was born and were acting it out on me. It had nothing to do with me.
How’s your Khan run going?
1 Like
I fully agree with you, sometimes I wish I could blame them for everything but their parents messed them up too growing up. Atleast we got these amazing subs to help us break and challenge these damn curses. On my 2nd week of st3, I don’t do Khan justice because I’m not out and about. It’s more introspection and ware abouts taking place and I’m horny as hell lol 
1 Like
Imagine if we could somehow blast a good sub into our distant generational past.
2 Likes
I can’t tell you how many time I have thought of the same thing.
1 Like
- Dream: I was in a wooded area trying to get somewhere. I saw a naked guy lying face down on the ground. I didn’t know if he was dead or what, but I figured I should probably call for help.
Then he started trying to get up and screaming incoherently. I don’t know if he had a head injury, was on drugs, drunk or what he had going on. I got the sense that he was dangerous though, I don’t know, like maybe a zombie or something.
I still wanted to call for help, but I didn’t want him to notice me and possibly attack me, so I tried to give him a wide berth.
It somehow seemed that he was keeping me from doing that. Like it would be difficult to get where I was going or to where I could call for help because he kind of noticed me and was moving to block me.
1 Like