Building Stark 2.0 - BLACKICE'S Q Custom Journal

First reactions:

the room with the high windows feels like looking from the perspective of a child.

this feels like a dream about reintegrating the parts of yourself that felt like they were broken by pain

you can put it back together

shakier impressions:

phone represents communication. Between the parts of yourself, between you and other people

You have the power and the choice to establish communication

‘You eat with us together or you don’t eat”

Your heart may be open and recognizing your capacity and need to connect (again can be internal, external, or both)

Family

But also boundaries

(I may be projecting A LOT here)

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It’s been a busy few days, I’ve hopped on here a few times to try and stay caught up, but I’ve finally got a journal-worthy update.

My first custom has arrived! And, for whatever reason it’s Terminus Squared, rather than Terminus. Ok, cool!

It actually arrived over a week ago but I didn’t think to check my spam folder (rookie mistake) and instead kept refreshing my downloads screen. Oops.

I downloaded Halcyon last night, and added the cover art that I’d created. I meant to listen to it last night but the baby had other plans. I finally got a chance to listen to it after lunch today and it knocked me out, the same way that the first listen to StarkQ Terminus did for me.

I was weaving in and out of sleep, and afterwards I felt pretty good! This was my first time listening to anything in T2 power level (again, I’m basing this on what the filename says…) and so far I like it!

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Another quick update, I’ve learned that I’ve irrevocably exchanged “Free Time” for a Tiny Little Human that has so far gotten almost every bodily fluid imaginable on me, and I’m sure there’s still more to come. And… I couldn’t be happier. :slight_smile:

Ok, update. As I mentioned, I listened to Halcyon for the first time yesterday. It resulted in 2 journal-worthy observations, so here they are.

I slept well. Ridiculously well, consideing there’s a TLH right next to our bed, and I woke up multiple times during the night to check on and/or change her. My Oura ring gave me a 93% sleep efficiency for last night, a definite improvement from the previous nights. Deep Sleep module ftw!

The other thing is the dream.

I dreamed that someone was explaining how to control negative thoughts/emotions. It was just a voice, I couldn’t see the speaker… but I remember what they said.

The gist of it was that most people react to unwanted thoughts or emotions in 2 ways. They either experience them, and react accordingly (feeling crappy, etc) or they force them down. This often results in more energy being expended, as your mind forces the thought into submission.

That’s foolish.

In the dream, I was shown that negative thoughts/emotions are more like a helium balloon… you can just hold your hand out and with no effort at all, hold it anywhere you want. Instead of pushing it down, just let it rest against your palm. You’re not pushing down, you’re letting it rest against you.

Peaceful.

I’m not sure I 100% understand what it means yet, but I woke up feeling a combination of peace and contentedness, as well as with the sense that I’d been given some profound wisdom.

My daughter has been having some health issues since she was born… nothing life threatening, but we have had to go back to the hospital several times for some tests… yesterday she was fussing like crazy, today she was so well behaved and chill (even when she had to get a needle poke in her foot for a blood sample) that I was amazed. Infinitely more zen than yesterday, and literally nothing that she did caused me to feel anything but love for her. I don’t need any help in that regard (my wife jokes that I was actually born a dad, I just didn’t get a kid until I was 40) but I’ll credit Steadfast or Survival Instinct for that mindset help.

So yeah, that was day 1 on Halcyon.

Until next time!

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You were channeling a free Sedona Method workshop in your sleep. :smile:

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Just scrolled up to re-read the module list on Halcyon. What an awesome custom for a (new) parent!

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I’ve actually read The Sedona Method years ago, so that makes sense as my dreams last night included a lesson as well:

The same voice was back, and it told me that I already have the answers to everything I will be facing. It showed me several things I’ve been thinking about, and then told me to hold each question in mind and look at my bookshelf and certain books will have exactly the information I need.
It then showed me the books to read to help with aspects of each thing. In this case, they were all business topics but they are things that have been on my mind.

It even showed me a specific way to write down questions that I’m pondering, in a specific notebook, to help me find solutions faster.

I’d originally planned to include Informaticon, but I ended up pulling it at the last minute. So, I guess either Steadfast or Survival Instinct has similar guidance scripting for problem solving?

I realize I haven’t posted the final module list yet, so here’s what’s in Halcyon:

  • Regeneration Core
  • Survival Instinct Core
  • Carpe Diem Ascended
  • DEUS
  • Lion IV
  • Omnidimensional
  • Pragya
  • Gratitude Embodiment
  • ARES
  • Blue Skies
  • Attachment Destroyer
  • Inner Voice
  • Iron Frame
  • Negativity Displacer
  • EGO ADSUM
  • Joie de Vivre
  • Stress Displacement
  • The Flow
  • Steadfast
  • Deep Sleep

I was up for over an hour in the night with a fussy baby, and the weather has changed, so I’ve got another headache today. I don’t feel that I slept well last night, but we’ll see what my Oura ring says when I sync it.

Overall, I’m really really liking Halcyon. :smiley:

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More interesting observations:

Last night I had a dream in which the voice was talking about skydiving, as a metaphor. The lesson: At some point, you will find yourself falling. It’s up to you how you see it… you can view it as plummeting out of control, or you can see it as flying.

I had another dream in which I was going on a business trip with my EA, and I was rushing to buy food in an airport before the flight and the vendor (which felt more like a street vendor with a cart than a restaurant etc) was impatient and grabbed the money from my hand to count out the correct amount himself. I owed another $4.50 or so, and he took a $50 from my hand hoping I wouldn’t notice it wasn’t a $5. I did notice, and grabbed it back and handed him a $5. Then I said “keep the change…” even though he’d just tried to cheat me. That was interesting.

This morning I was sitting outside a doctor’s office as my wife and baby were getting a checkup, and I found myself looking at the ripples in a puddle in the parking lot and thinking how pretty the patterns were. Ego Adsum or The Flow?

I’ve also noticed negative self-talk being shut down very quickly, whether it be anxiety-related or just something that annoys me. I still have negative thoughts, but they tend to fizzle out after a couple of seconds now, which I’m still getting used to. I was at Costco today and was cut off by other shoppers multiple times, but instead of getting annoyed I was just like “lol ok, I guess you’re going next, even though I was here first…”

We also got a government letter in the mail today, addressed to my wife. My first thought was it’s something to do with her immigration status and a mild panic set in. (background info: she’s from a country that is currently not having happy fun time with my country…) But, after a second or 2 I rationalized that it’s unlikely to be anything serious, as she is here legally and has 3 years left before her residency status has to be renewed or she applies for citizenship. Turns out, it was just our baby’s birth certificate. So, what would previously have evoked a stress response, even a minor one, is now getting calmly reacted to. I like that.

I should note that this is still all from a single listen, several days ago!

Halcyon is awesome.

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@BLACKICE, woah congratulations on birthing a daughter!

Reflecting on your time with Stark, did you find yourself having any sleep issues, nightmares or straight-up out of the ordinary third person dreams? Or a heavy reconciliation cycle, happening every other day or so due to New Beginnings?

Thanks!! But technically, my wife did the birthing… lol :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

I’ve had sleep issues going back years, mostly in the form of very light sleep and a lack of deep sleep. I’ve been tracking my sleep with an Oura ring for a few months now, and what I’ve realized is I get huge amounts of REM sleep but often only a bit of deep sleep. So I wake up feeling tired still, but having remembered hours and hours of dreams. It’s not anywhere close to a good thing… I wake up feeling like I’ve been watching movies all night, instead of resting.

Since Stark, my sleep has improved (although tbh I have been doing other stuff as well, including being much more strict with my keto diet, and really dialing in my supplement stack and maintaining a good sleep/wake cycle). ALL of my dreams are out of the ordinary, and if I wanted to train myself to recognize that I’d be able to have lucid dreams very often I think. No reconciliation that I can directly attribute to Stark or any other subs, I’ve certainly had some doubts about various things relating to business, but those resolved themselves with clarification conversations and IMHO were not related to reactions to sublimninals.
Is NB in Stark or Regeneration? If not, I don’t think I’ve listened to it then.

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Aha, that’s right!

This is exactly what I’m feeling on Stark, a lot of sleep but none of it is Deep Sleep, seems like a lot of REM sleep due to all of those movie like dreams I’m encountering.

And yes, New Beginnings in Stark.

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Very brief update today.

I listened to Halcyon again today, and meditated out on the deck while doing so. I ended up falling asleep, and had a very intense dream. I swear I slept for a long time, but it was less than 30 minutes.

In the dream I was in a room with some other people, and we were adjusting our tuxedos. (yeah, fancy dream) For some reason, my bowtie wasn’t on right and while I could breathe, I wasn’t able to speak. One of the other people adjusted it for me, and it turned into an infinity symbol stuck to my throat, and began to hum/vibrate/whatever… like it was brimming with power. I don’t remember the words, but I do recall that there was something wrong with the bowtie that had caused it to block my voice.

I woke up feeling pretty serene. Then I had to go change a diaper. That was less serene. lol.

Before anyone asks, no there’s no discernable change in my voice afterward. :thinking:

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I am absolutely loving my first custom… though it’s still in T2 power level, so I’m only listening once per week.

But, since starting Executive, I’ve been thinking much more about getting serious with physical fitness again. I’ve been strict keto for many months, and that’s done wonders for me… but the last 2 weeks have been lazy… not junk food, but definitely not strict keto.

That’s changing now… I’ve gone back to strict keto, and I’m scheduling workouts at the gym next week now that it’s open again… no more drop-in, just reserved times to limit the number of people. I’m also planning to start another SARMs cycle, along with some herbs & supplements that @Azriel suggested.

Which brings me to my next custom

Extremis

This custom is designed for one thing and one thing only. Getting me to my peak physical fitness level, and maximizing healing. It will be run alongside my emotional/mental healing custom Halcyon, and also with StarkQT, BLU, and The Executive.

  • EF ST4
  • Spartan Core
  • Deep Sleep
  • Pragya
  • DEUS
  • Carpe Diem Ascended
  • Apollon
  • Asclepius
  • Epigenetics & DNA Modulator
  • Equilibrium
  • Extreme Exercise Motivation
  • Inexhaustible
  • Master’s Coordination
  • Physicality Shifter - Sexiness
  • Serum X
  • The Architect
  • Alpha Body Language
  • Limit Destroyer
  • Lion IV

And for the 20th spot, I’m considering:

  • Yggdrasil
  • Jupiter

I would greatly appreciate any thoughts & suggestions for modules. Am I missing something? I’m not sure when I’ll be ordering this, but likely sometime in October.

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looks really good,
the only thing I would comment on in Apollon and Physicality Shifter-Sexiness.
If you go through the new Q pack module thread, you can read Fire’s comments on them, as they seem to have different end goals that may contradict each other slightly, I couldn’t get an answer on it. But perhaps something to consider.

What about IQ booster for the 20th spot?-it would go well epigenetics & DNA Modulator and is technically a physical change module. Plus you’ll get really smart about your planning and structuring your workouts lol.

For this custom between Jupiter and Yggdrasil I would go Jupiter, its conscious intentionality and visual specificity may help with manifesting the physical changes your custom aims at.

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Hmm… I’ll take a look again. My goal is just to get an ideal body for my own sake, not trying to impress anyone (ok maybe I want to impress my wife… she says if I get 6-pack abs, she’ll get a Princess Leia gold bikini costume…) or win any awards. If that was your goal, which module would you go for?

I’ve actually got that one in both my wealth custom and a planned intelligence boosting one, based on QL. :slight_smile:

Thanks! I appreciate the feedback, as always! :smiley:

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For sure!

Honestly, I just like the connoisseurship of subs distinctions, but I am being self indulgent in nit-picking and would probably go for both :slight_smile:

awesome, can’t wait to see the cover art for that.

Of course :slight_smile: !

but if I had to pick one for your goal, it would be Apollon

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Revision #1:

  • EF ST4
  • Spartan Core
  • Deep Sleep
  • Pragya
  • DEUS
  • Carpe Diem Ascended
  • Apollon
  • Asclepius
  • Epigenetics & DNA Modulator
  • Equilibrium
  • Extreme Exercise Motivation
  • Inexhaustible
  • Master’s Coordination
  • Serum X
  • The Architect
  • Alpha Body Language
  • Limit Destroyer
  • Lion IV
  • Jupiter

new

  • Informaticon - new health-related info would be useful
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Excellent list of modules, @BLACKICE. I was strict keto for around 8 months and it did help me lose 33kgs.

But do take a look into the Carnivore diet (it’s a form of keto diet). I feel like recommending this to you for some reason (possibly because you are focused on health and cause you are a new dad).

Am doing this since 2 months and it’s working great for me. Jordan Peterson was recommended this diet by his daughter and it helped heal both their depression among many other things especially for her.

I would recommend the MeatRx YouTube channel if you want to listen to loads of testimonials on this diet. And here am linking Jordan Peterson’s daughter, Mikhaila’s own story regarding the same diet:

I’ve been hearing about the carnivore diet a lot actually, most surprisingly, from my doctor. She’s all for it… I’m not so certain.

Last year when I was in China, I realized that they don’t do raw vegetables there. I couldn’t find a salad to save my life. After flying back home, I think I lived on salads for a week. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good steak, and had bbq ribs for dinner tonight… but I really miss veggies if I don’t get enough of them. I think I’d have a very difficult time on the carnivore diet.

I’ll check the video out though, as I recall feeling the same level of skepticism years ago when I was first introduced to the paleo diet. :nerd_face:

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@BLACKICE - the skepticism is understandable since even I thought it crazy. The science behind it is very sound though and the hundreds of testimonials back it up. People are giving up their medicines and healing their neurological diseases (and many others) based on just eating meat.

The short science of it is that plants are not actually good for your body since they have anti-nutrients in them.

But don’t listen only to me of course. Do listen to Mikhaila and the videos in the MeatRx YouTube channel. And prepare to be mind-blown.

But whatever diet you follow, wishing you well on your new custom, dude👍

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