Tbh, I just picked LBfH because its free. It’s a great sub as far as I’ve read, but my goal was to go for DR:LB after one or tow cycles and next year to start with DR multi stage…
I see my struggles and my inner limitations. That I can’t make a decision and work towards my goals in a focused manner. Also I know of many of my traumas from Childhood. That’s why I planned to go with the DR titels.
Which advantages do you see in keeping LBfH?
Stay focused on the subs you picked. Switching too fast is what slows down progress. Emperor and LBFH have a lot to offer. Do yourself a favor and stay the course. You’ll always have time for Dragon Reborn (which by the way is not a beginner’s sub).
Weight: 117,3 kg
Slept till 7:30. First day of running subs for just 7 minutes. Started emperor while reading the forum. When I checked in on the sub I was at 6:59 and stopped at exactly 7 minutes. Manifestation works
No impulses to look at anything pornographic in the last couple of days. Only here and there some images of games I used to play pop up in my head and vanish in a matter of seconds. Asking myself if this part of the healing.
Since I started subs last week, not solid at all. Sometimes even explosive. I had this happening before when I was letting go of certain beliefs, traumas, etc
Nothing major happening today.
Wasn’t as tired as the days before. Looking forward to tomorrow. Perhaps 7 minutes is better at the beginning.
Still spending to much time on this forum consuming instead of taking action. Came to the conclusion it’s ethical to start my coaching business despite knowing of subliminals being able to help people. I don’t know much about how the introspection will work with subs, but I realized, that a coach is still very helpful, even with subs. Getting a kick in the ass and a opinion on the topic I’m trying to heal from someone who did the whole process himself is paramount for a quick success.
I need to implement a tighter schedule, That’s the reason I was considering buying LE at first before going for Emperor. I’m still not that productive.
Also I realized, that I need to attack some big points:
Weight: 117,0 kg
Noticed semen in my underwear without having erotic dreams, thoughts or other stuff. No stimulation at all in that regard.
Decided to run an offline journal. No changes online, but I will start to write down, what I want to achieve, with or without emperor.
Will start tomorrow first thing in the morning.
I noticed that the last couple of days. Struggling if I really should start my business, if theirs need in the presence of subs, and I came to the conclusion, it’s what I want to do. At least in the beginning. You’ll never know, where emperor will take you.
28.09.2023
Weight:116.8 kg
Lost my pillbox yesterday on a hike through the forest. Manifested how I will find it laying in the grass. And just did so, exactly how I visualized it.
Ran both, Emperor + LBfH, for 15 minutes because I wanted to notice the ???-shift that should
Ran both, Emperor + LBfH, for 15 minutes, because I wanted to feel the ???- shift that should start after 17-20 minutes. Only thing that started around that time was an intense tiredness. Almost fell asleep at my desk.
I come more and more on terms with the fact that I need to take serious action when I want the subs to work at full potential. Considering getting up earlier to do some workout before making my grandmother some breakfast. Just Walking or jogging for half an hour and some stretching for the beginning should do.
Still didn’t start with my offline journal where I want to brainstorm what my goals should look like and what I really desire to see in my life.
Pondering about a third sub. When to introduce it? In the second cycle? afterwards ? or even later? Also which one? Wealth-related (RICH)? Productivity (LE or AM)? Healing (DR:LB Reborn)? Should healing be run alone?
The day flew by without much accomplishment. I’m getting angry with myself for not taking action.
Got up at 6:30 went for a walk, 4300 steps. A first step. Considering jogging instead.
Not much action taken today, but a lot of reflection.
I read @Fire s “sermon”
a few times. Reflected his text on my life. I need to take more action, need to become more active, taking control over my life instead of just living from day to day, hoping for some mysterious change happening.
I see a few first steps into taking action. Like getting up earlier and doing some cardio. I’ve listened to emperor 6 times and have been reading a lot in here. It wasn’t action in se. But it gave me a lot to reflect just like Fires text. And it assisted the minimal action I’ve already taken. Theres an anxious part in me, that I will drop out like AjUK, but it’s only little. There’s so much change in my live in the last 30 months, that I can trust my self, that I will keep fighting.
I’m planning to join a martial arts club. Don’t know what style yet. Muay Thai seems popular in here and there’s even a sub. I found a club 10 minutes from here. The members there won quite some medals at world championships, so they know, what they’re doing,.
On the other hand, there’s a wing tsun club 15 minutes away. They offer also escrima, what I did for a year back in college. I really like escrima and wing tsun looks cool (big Ipman fan), but Muay Thai seems a bit more hands on. The sounds more benefiting for masculinity and alpha.
So, fist find a job.
Then join a martial arts club.
Writing my offline journal to outline my bigger goals is still not done. But also a big point on my to-do-list
Realized today, how much I hurt my fiance by telling my family about her depression without asking her about it before. I thought I did it, to reduce the pressure on her. But today I realized, that I did it, to reduce the pressure on me.
Woke up many times this night. Got up at 5:30. Muscle soreness in my legs. Felt like crap. Decided to spent some more time on my healing mat instead of walking.
Sunday or Monday, I’ll visit a renfair with my fiance. I made it a condition, that I have to seriously start looking for a job. And so I did.
First steps are taken. Found 24 possible openings. Started the application for the first one. Counting and Interviewing passengers in public transport.
Don’t know if it’s the subs, but it feels much easier to write the letter of application than in January, when I was looking for job the last time. It’s easier to focus on my abilities, what I have to offer and I’m not as apologetic about my past. Also, I did notice, that I start to like what I see in the mirror more and more with every day, despite being more overweight than most of my life.
There’s another possibel job as well. I like driving (who doesn’t) and a friend of my mothers has a taxi company. When I mentioned it to my mom, she said that a few of their drivers retired, so the’re shorthanded and probably are looking for replacements. Since the owner knows and likes me, perhaps that’s a chance.
Listening to the subs right now, just two hours before I’ll go to bed. Let’s see, what it will do to my sleep.
Slept quite well and long. No alarm on Sunday. Got up at 8.
Not much to report today.
Went to a beautiful ren’fair. Ronneburg. One of Germanys only completly undestroyed castles. We took a tour through the castle. Beautiful but huge and kinda like a maze.
Met a couple of new people. Sozializing is easy for me. We met a group of 7 young peeps. Talked about fencing, one of them even had a beginners course with my Trainer. One of them had a lute and played a song for us. Especially interessting since my fiance considers learning it as well.
I also met the organizer of the whole event and had a nice chat with him.
I was energetic the whole day. Only on our way home it felt rather like 4am than 9pm. I was done. Is it me getting older or is it the subs taking their toll?
Had a terrible night. Fiance was in severe menstrual pain. Took care of her but woke up pretty often afterwards. Nevertheless got up at 6:30 and went jogging for the first time. Ok, half of the distance was rather walking, but I know it will improve over time.
A nice change that I noticed is, that I’m surprisingly flexible. In the past I wasn’t able to touch the ground with the tips of my fingers after a longer period without sport/stretching, but today it was easy. Is this a part of Emperor?
Finished writing my first application today. Tomorrow I only need to take a new picture and I can send it out. Listened to my subs while writing it and it went real smooth.
Bought Ultimate Writer for my fiance today. Let’s see how it works out for her.
For tomorrow I have a few important to-dos which I keep here on record for accountability.
take a photo and send my first application to a possible employer
make the last payment to the debt collector for Germanies propaganda blackmail which I’m unwilling to pay. I need to open a letter from him, what I’m unwilling to do.
Open a letter from the chamber of commerce
pay the monthly fee for my coaching instructor
start my offline journal to really understand what I want to achieve in life
Open a new question-thread about which third sub to best add to my stack to reach my goal
Down 2kg in one week. I’m kinda hyped on this.
Night was a little better but still woke up quite often. Had a dream about porn or a porn game. Was rather disturbing, not arousinng at all. Since I started my journey with LBfH and Emperor, I had regular dreams and images pop up in my head during the day about what porn I consumed in the past without any arousal. Perhaps that’s a sign of healing/ letting go.
No Jogging today. Severe muscle soreness in the morning.
I totally forgot, that 3. Oktober is our national holiday. Disrupted my whole schedule. My Uncle didn’t go to work, instead he said he’ll finish a workbench I asked him about a couple of days ago and that he would need my help. So I spent three hours preparing and assembling it. Afterwards I was finally able to tidy up my leather workshop, because I now had the space to store everything. Did this until 7pm and took a long overdue shower.
At 5:30 it started to rain cats and dogs. I called my mom that her bedroom window was still open. Half an hour later she called me, that I immediately HAVE TO come to the bathroom were I left the window opened. Its totally drenched. I wasn’t even in the bathroom today because I was working from right after breakfast. When I told her that, she immediately hang up. I’m so done with this shit. She could have asked me nicely if I could help her mop the bathroom. But this whole unjustified blame thing is infuriating. When I asked my fiance, if she could help her, she told me, that my mom did the same blame game to her. She even clarified, that she wasn’t the one opening the window. It was open already when she got up. And that my mom opens it every night for air circulation.
I don’t take this shit anymore. Could be emperor as well that I’m enforcing my boundaries.
So tomorrow are has the same to do list as today.
Kinda annoyed, that the weight didn’t go down. Had breakfast yesterday and also drank a beer in the evening. Not doing this anymore. Kept to my eating schedule today and won’t have a beer tonight.
No Jogging today either. I was looking outside and there wasn’t the slightest bit of motivation to go outside. Just lay on my healing mat for an hour and started my day.
Also I didn’t do any of the tasks from my list. I’m angry with myself. Or is it disappointment?
Probably the later.
Did some household chores in the morning and in the afternoon I continued cleaning my leather workshop because I was sleepy after to many carbohydrates for lunch. After that I started to high-pressure-clean our yard. You know these relaxing videos of easily removing this dark film from stone? Exactly that.
My mother asked her Taxidriver if they’re still shorthanded and he affirmed. Tomorrow we will visit the owner.
I still need to have a conversation with my mom about her outbreak yesterday. One part of me would have totally forgotten about it, but she need build awareness about this stuff. She also has emotional healing to do and awareness is the first step. Also my fiance expects me to talk to my mom about it. That she’s really pissed when she’s treated like this and I can totally understand her. It’s a good lesson for me to do the things I usually would seek to avoid. Although it would also her responsibility to take care of her well-being, but that’s for another day.
So, for tomorrow I have the same important to-dos which I keep here on record for accountability (again)
I got up at 6:30. Straight to the scale. I was shocked. I didn’t eat much yesterday, not after 6pm and still my weight increased by 800 grams. Turned me totally petulant in an instant. I was like “gaining weight, ok, so if you don’t do what you’re supposed to do, then no jogging for you either”.
In the afternoon, I called the Taxi owner, and he said, they’re looking only for a night driver on standby duty. Totally not what I’m looking for. A part of me saw this Idea, of me driving taxi, as a hint of fate, that I came up with the idea and that it will be all easy. So When I got declined, I got petulant again. So I player some Witcher on my PS3.
After that, I continued cleaning the yard.
On the bright side, I did a few tasks from my to-do list. Payed my coaching Instructor, Took the photo for my application and sent it out, and I finally started my offline Journal. Only 3 pages yet, but In know, there will be at least 10 more in the next couple of days.
I also did some research on my third sub. I’m not sure about the approach I should take. Getting hyper produktive and start earning money with my business, healing whats holding me back or running a wealth title. LE sounds pretty good for route 1, AM as well, especially with the alpha scripting. But that’s in Emperor as well, but it’s also in the stacking recommendations. And Genesis would be another option for this path.
Perhaps Nuevo Fucking Vesper is all I need. Will know tomorrow.
Here are my to-dos for tomorrow
Finally some weight down again.
Got to sleep late yesterday, because we watched a Bollywood film. Slept till 7:30.
Buying groceries and bringing my aunt to the airport was much more time intensive then I thought. Barely managed to read the Nuevo Vesper book and the corresponding thread.
If @Vesper is right with his interpretation, then Nuevo RICH might be the perfect sub to build my coaching business (new money) and to disrupt the porn market.
In the evening I met an old friend from school I didn’t see in 8 years. Was very nice to catch up. Looks like I’m not the only one with a Life full of twists and turns. Many of my former friends have broken biographies. And only one really made it. He’s Chief Information Security Officer at the Deutsche Bahn, the German Railway.
Job-wise, I heard back from my first application. They wanna have a zoom-call next week.
Taxi-driving is back in the game. I heard, that three companies are locking for drivers. On the downside, I have to pay the medical checkup and a lot of other stuff from my own pocket. That would be around 400-500€. So half a month of work for just getting a job I don’t know I will like.
Only completed two of my goals today. So most will stay.
Here are my to-dos for tomorrow
make the last payment to the debt collector for Germanys propaganda blackmail which I’m unwilling to pay. I need to open a letter from him, what I’m unwilling to do.
Open a letter from the chamber of commerce
Open a new question-thread about which third sub to best add to my stack to reach my goal
Writing another application for a job in production
Continue my offline Journal
Are you building a romance/dating coaching business?
I just cannot believe that they pay as little in Germany. I would get 800€ a month when working as a hotel entertainer in Spain seven years ago (the food and accommodation was for “free”). I will be getting 1000-1400€ a month (working 120-150 hours a month) for working as an English teacher in Hanoi yet the cost of living are way lower than in Germany. Have you ever thought of working abroad?
I’m looking for a part time job only. 20h/week, 4 weeks a month, 12€/hour. Makes about 960€ for a month. After taxes it’s about 820€.
And for working abroad, I have my family here, and are the one responsible for my grandma.
I’m looking only for a part time job to be able to build my business.
That could later be part of, but the main topic is porn addiction. Since many real porn addicts never had a relationship, that might become necessary as well.
I see not sure if Nouveau Wealth will help reach the big wealth in that niche. Like it help with wealth for that offer but I don’t know how big you can scale it. Might want to broaden it further down the line (One of the guys I use to know had that exact same coaching offer). Like making that offer part of a dating, social skills, etc offer. You’d be able to target more clients which will mean you will have more customers which will generate more wealth.
Either way WB + Nouveau RICH. Would be the perfect combo for this or True Sell + Nouveau RICH.
07.Oktober
Weight: 115,3
Forgot to set up an alarm and slept for 10 hours straight. Didn’t happen in ages.
Listend to LBfH while writing my last post and could.t sleep afterwards. Interestingly, Emperor makes me sleepy, LBfH acts like coffeine.
Weight went up a little, but I don’t care atm. I know that I kept my diet and that’s the important thing. Funny thing though, when I got of the scale in the morning, my knee started to hurt real badly. Especially when I’m taking the stairs. And there are three between my Bedroom and my office.
Opened the letters. Payed the last rate (that went up 50 Bucks from the last time (handling fee)). Continued my Offline Journal. Still reflecting on my Questions thread. On the one hand, I need to understand better what I want to accomplish, on the other hand what is most urgent and needs to be done as fast as possible.
So tomorrow its
Forgot to set an alarm and slept till 9:30.
That’s totally unusual for me. Normally I wake up everyday between 5 and 7:30 when nature is calling. But on Friday night, I said to my body “I forbid you to wake me with pressure on my bladder”. And I didn’t wake up since then.
My knee is pretty well again. It started with some pain, but it got better over the day and expect it to be gone tomorrow.
I realized, that I accept my responsibilities in live. After I paid the debt collector and my Coaching Instructor yesterday, I got a mail from a coach I had one session last year, that was supposed to help some internal blockade but did absolutely nothing. Last year, I wasn’t willing to pay because there were so many liabilities and I didn’t even know, how to pay for food sometimes. Today, I don’t know how to pay all my debts, but I feel the need, to start paying off, even if it’s just in little steps.
It’s Sunday, so I took more or less of today, enjoying my day. Some would say wasted my day, but that will get better as well. I completed two tasks from my list, and tomorrow, I’ll take care of the rest.
Btw, while answering the letter from the chamber of commerce, I found out, that I don’t need to pay any fee as long as I don’t make at least 15k/year. That’s a relief, because in my former state, the annual fee would be about 200€/year.
So tomorrow it is