thanks 
It may contain twice the information but could also be the equivalent of 6 x the loops of 1 Q lol?
Day 8
Ran Emperor X in Q instead of Terminus today 2 loops
I’m able to pick up on what terminus is doing because I see it more highlighted in Q.
It’s there in Terminus but I don’t realize it until I slow things down in Q almost.
Anyway today was great. Knocked out 5 hours of work straight, complete ease in all the jobs I have now and with the people involved, PCC in custom seems to really support this, I’m finding I’m behaving more like a stellar employee again and less like a maverick who gives shit but gets the job done, this is bringing me peace of mind, and opening up new opportunities.
I started a 10 week experiential meditation program and alongside Alchemist I am present to my whole world opening up again, and am just loving the experience of even being alive. There such infinite complexity, wonder, and fulfillment, in my stupid days where I do nothing from a certain vantage point. All my drive for success has been so rooted in pain, I am now transitioning over to a new fuel source but also learning to embrace and transmute this pain rather than react from it.
Starting to cultivate an appreciation and value for things that will directly move my life forward, working on my own business is one of those things, reading more and more and implementing is another…
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I’m more and more present to the experience of nothing I am doing adding up to anything significant, not in a negative way, it’s just like nothing will ever fundamentally change except for me in any situation, I am looking at goals and achievements more like ongoing experiences and relationships to life and others than to a solid thing. What is the experience I want to be having in life? What do I want to be doing? What would I like to receive? Who would I like to be with? Who do I need to be/become to be living the answers to those questions.
At the same time I am really craving strong, feedback in the form of concrete new wins, new woman I am sleeping with, new business, new income streams. Its weird to have both of these going on-I wonder how the two will resolve
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I had intended to but no for a bit.
are you referencing something specific? and if so what kind of support in Ultima do you think would be best for what you see?
Day 9
Not much to report, I really don’t feel like posting this often, but I will continue to do 30 days as I said.
went back to Emperor Terminus today and it pushed me a bit to far into reconciliation. I got super tired, broke my day’s fast around 5 and lay in bed watching Blood of Zeus on netflix- it’s been 4+ month’s since that kind of relapse lol. I did get a bunch done earlier in the day, After a couple hours I was ready to succumb to full chill day but when running LightQ had sudden release of tiredness and funk and got a bunch of shit done, that I was ready to check off for the day.
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Day 10
still massively tired today
broke my no-nut November streak 
not making it a big deal
back on the horse now but it is insane the difference in the quality of my drive and energy when I No-Nut.
went back to Emperor X Q version 2 loops
1 loop elixir 2 loops Alchemist stage 1
and will run Light Q as I fall asleep.
I just got offered essentially carte blanche on billable hours for a certain project, it’s not what I want to do but I may rake it in to up the wealth for the holiday season.
My brother and I started working on my business together, he’s professionally made a good deal of money doing what I’m interested in and he wants to get on board and support what I’m up to. Also felt just really inspiring and good to connect with him, as we’ve been distant lately. I think Alchemist and Spiritual Abundance modules really helping with this.
I am absolutely loving daily mediation. I sit down and it’s like total freedom, and infinity -for 15 minutes.
I’m getting a lot of rapid changes and profound realizations between my healing sub and Alchemist Stage 1. Alchemist gives me a profound certainty in whatever I end up choosing.
I’ve also had a lot of difficult insecurities surfacing, and I’m dealing with them rapidly.
I feel like with Emperor+Alchemist-+Light Q -the synergy is I am letting go of the root of my fears and more and more acting from a space of fearlessness. Not even bravery or courage or confidence-but fearlessness-it just feels like clarity, knowingness, intention and at times love
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HOM at work
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Maybe a bloom from HOM contributed but I stopped running it two weeks ago.
I don’t know if it’s a healing phase but I am finding a strong internal resistance and fear of rejection to further reaching out/escalating with woman. I’ve always just powered through and let the chips fall where they may but lately I’m wanting more skill in this. I’m tired of the experience of mind-blowing ,meetings/ connections-sex and then things not working out, I think the fear of this failure is stopping me. I will be present with what is coming up and do my best to just be with it, and release it/ let it heal.
I’m finding a lot of reconciliation coming up towards the end of this week around shortening my stack or modifying things, an uncertainty I am doing the right thing. This is always a sign of reconciliation for me so the weekend off will be much needed.
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To me, this sounds like you’re good at and comfortable with certain parts of the process and now you’re practicing some other parts. It’s just a different set of skills and expectations. As you learn those new parts, you’ll just get even better.
In other words, it is not about a limitation in the current approach; it’s about evolving into a different area. (I’m not going to try to express this clearly. haha.)
That sounds cheery. But I think it might be true.
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thanks @Malkuth
I get what your saying, it also seems to be about evolving in the right direction in this area this time, like breaking a bone to reset it, or going back to being a baby to relearn.
Anyway, I appreciate what your saying and it’s of value to add to my perspective for going forward.
Only took Saturday off,
the weekend sucked total relapse in emotional, chill state.
Ran 1 loop of Emperor Terminus Sunday and kicked into gear got a lot of personal commitments done. I need to plan my weekends better, unless I travel, they’ve become like wipe out states from the insane week. I want to either be actively with woman on the weekend or doing something productive for my own business, or have some planned social time.
I’m dropping all Terminus subs for the week and will run Emperor custom in Q with Alchemist, and Light Q. May even drop azriel Q for the week. I need a de-load. Will also take the week of Ultima.
Enjoying this while working.
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Just read the last three week of your journal and really nice having news from you!
I would like to point that out :
I know you told you had low interest in Sex & Seduction, but since SS is weapon X, it would be really effective at developping this 
And I also have a question that popped into my mind while reading. Your custom, Emperor X, there is no healing in it! Only action modules (or skills, or manifestation). How do you think a custom with no healing affect you vs a custom with healing. What’s the difference between running a stack with healing vs not?
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thanks for the recommendation
yeah its weird I could use a boost with that but wont be switching out anything for SS anytime for a while.
I think Primal might be better for this though. I just have no umpgh to reach out and make things happen, it’s more inner game than skills, but I’m sure S and S would help with it as well.
Also I have Primal Seduction which has the weapon X platform of Sex and Seduction in it. It’s in a dense custom and stack. I’ve found I’ve slowly been developing progress in fitness, seduction, self love, self image, sense of limitlessness, alpha masculinity, social life- with everything I’ve been running, while more strongly making progress in discipline, focus, execution, work, independence- So exactly as expected the goals of Emperor taking the front run, while the goals of the other subs slowly building. One of these slowly improving abilities may be S and S in PS but I’ve only noticed a dramatic improvement in my in person communication with woman.
Actually everything in terms of manifestation and ease has dropped off the face of the map as of late, woman, deals, I seem to be in a challenge phase of making everything happen one foot in front of the other. Or I may not be acting on opportunities manifested so nothing is coming of them, I can’t tell (note to self to take inventory of that)
I’ve run it only consistently with Azriel Q-which has Ares, Blue Skies, and Feburss, and the newest custom in my stack is almost exclusively healing, so it’s not really like I’m running it without healing lol.
I think the changes are going deeper but the execution is slower with healing. First week of December I may experiment with running just Emperor/Sex Mastery custom solo.
I’ve switched from the Terminus version, terminus seemed to boost my confidence and Alpha insanely and had spurts of some insane manifestations but wasn’t consistent.
I have not really seen much in the way of sultan, longe range seduction, and sex manifestation -my stack is large, and I jumped into terminus on this sub, so nothing against the potential of these modules, but expect to see the manifestation go up on Q, and lowering the stack.
Hmmm, do you think the manifestation slowed down when you added the extra healing? 
No, I added the healing sub November 1 st and it’s actually accelerating changes and transformation very fast. Running my 4 core Azriel Q likely has slowed down the custom Emperor though.
My sense, intuitively and as far as I can tell is that. I would say that Februus, Regeneration, Blue Skies to a degree, Survival Instinct, Primal Seduction all slowing down my wealth, purpose, career, progress but add other advantages, while the modules ares, limit destroyer, spiritual freedom, I AM, attachment destroyer, core PCC…and the others in my custom healing are speeding things up
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Ok ok I’ll try to mix all of this in my head. It seems we can never get a grasp of subliminal and how they affect someone!
yeah it’s nuanced, and not as black and white as would be easier. To many variables.
I’ll make it easier. All the subs that are slowing things down, involve unearthing difficult emotions or have primary goals not related to wealth, success, or career. All the subs that are speeding things up involve removal and disconnect from negative emotions, and have primary goals that directly dissolve limits, attachments, stuck areas or add intense positive emotions/capacities that are easily applicable to the goals of wealth, career etc.
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Day 11
Emperor X in Q format 3 loops
1 loop Alchemist
will play one loop Light while I pass out
Emperor X in Q format-AHHH feels good, feels like back home at Emperor Q but better. I missed this. Everything is crystal clear, contained, controlled flow.
Routines done check
workout check
meditations check
what’s different about this is I am back connected to why I am doing what I am doing, it’s to optimize the conditions, machinery, being, and capacity to achieve greater things and hit chosen goals.
I believe I may have been having much more reconciliation than I realized on Terminus Emperor. at least without a solid day or two break from it after. It gives me super confidence, dominance, attraction, productivity so it’s hard to notice the recon but I see now I may lose sight of why I am doing what I am doing and go a little to far into IDGAF mode. But Q feels more what I need right now, steady, and slow, and building consistently.
Alchemist stage 1 has been bringing up a sense of bland blahness about life towards the end of last week, it’s like a numbing flavor or blanket I can feel, that’s my recon on it at list, or part of the purification process, but after running a loop tonight, I feel my energy way up, my clarity sharpened, my mind clearer, my will stronger, and a sense of distance from problems.
I am very drawn to the new dragon reborn multistage. I need a hyperbolic time chamber to catch up on multi-stage subs. I wonder if it will stack well with alchemist 
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