Huge recon right now and huge breakthrough at the same time. Really big stuff got unblocked; integrating it…
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New recon surfaced, around scheduling and productivity
I don’t know which sub(s) causes that but I get clear signs that I’d benefit a lot from scheduling yet can’t stop feeling like it’s a voluntary self imposed slavery
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Noticing the work of financial subs. Some nervousness about specific tasks disappeared; worked more than usual;
Some recon too, in the form of hopelessness and depression and the feeling of [wanting to give up but not having the ability to do so] (no idea how to call it)
Maybe I’ll take a rest day tomorrow?
Also did some more tweaking to my routine. I’m nearly finished with setting up everything I wanted, learning about habit loops was the key. Now I just need to stay consistent and increase the volume of certain actions
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Yes, the mind craves a rest day, so rest day it is
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Going to reduce my stack back to 1 min; getting strong recon from 3 mins today
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Or maybe I even do the reset for all subs to give my mind a break and allow it to consolidate changes?
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having really stressful days, felt absolutely awful mentally this night but the day went much better than expected. Really felt like some big chunk got reconciled by the end of the day and got integrated, and a lot of my beliefs reorganized, and I could consciously see what has changed and how. Real progress is happening.
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Feeling as if I regressed back these last couple of days. It’s fine, stuff like that happens, gotta look at the overall trend
I don’t think it’s recon, just my lack of self awareness at certain moments that lead to emergence of the old habits
I have a vague idea of how I should proceed to move past it forever. Going to keep working on it
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I believe that’s the right way of approaching it.
Realising the excessive attachment towards steady upward progress is as important as the progress itself. The overall trend is up, so it’s wise to choose not to suffer excessively from the day to day ups and downs.
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Thanks
For some reasons, this phrase triggers negative feelings in me. Like, it feels right but I don’t want to accept it for an unknown reason
I guess that’s a limiting belief dropping in real time haha. Maybe it’s the self-sabotage scripting in The Stabilizer working right now
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just had an amazing wealth manifestation 
super happy, this money will help me greatly!
On a side note, I keep thinking about what to do when I finish this cycle of The Stabilizer.
On one hand, I do need to work a lot on my productivity, focus, boredom tolerance, etc. Hence, EE comes to mind. Also, Emperor, GLM and Ascension ST2 (all subs that seem to have a strong productivity push according to what I read on the forum). I wanted to use EOG instead previously but I dropped that idea, trusting that Mogul + RICH is more than enough at my current point
But on the other hand, it seems to be that The Stabilizer is slowly but surely tackling these issues. Along with other subs in my stack - RICH, Genesis Mogul.
It’s also worth noting that while I’m 157 days on RICH, I’m just 66 days on Genesis Mogul, and 54 days on The Stabilizer. It’s natural that the productivity scripting in both hasn’t kicked in properly yet - it’s a hard topic for me, there’s a lot of work that needs to be done
So the question is - do I really need to change anything with my stack? Or maybe I should just let it do its thing for longer durations, along with Genesis Mogul, and I’ll naturally experience the rise of productivity anyway via better integration of the script?
Maybe I’ll have even better results in the future, because The Stabilizer is a foundation-building sub. The wider and stronger my foundation is, the easier it is to build on top of it.
It also makes me wonder if this “resistance” to changing it is self-sabotage script at work, helping me let go of idea of finding the “perfect” stack?
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interesting day today, feeling like a lot of processing happened. Bought myself a wealth notebook - found this tip in Cal Newport’s podcast. He recommends buying a notebook specifically for your current goal/problem that you are trying to solve and filling it with thoughts, experiments, etc.
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I wonder if days like that mean that I’ve encountered and started reconciling some big block. Because I certainlly don’t have these days that often, and they are also filled with reflection, thinking about stuff, etc.
I’m also thinking a lot about money. The philosophical “why?” side of it - why do I need money? how much? What do I really want? (certainly not just abstract number in my bank account - I’m sure I need money for SOMETHING - but I have no idea for what exactly"
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Yeah I think these occasional resets are useful. I guess I’ll schedule them after every 20 listening days during the cycle
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Yesterday was great, today is a bit of a regress
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Achieved a little milestone in my work. Life’s good
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It seems like my reconciliation is going in cycles. I can feel a certain build up going on, like I have a very very vague idea of what is being reconciled at the moment. And from my experience, soon I’ll be fully conscious of it and afterwards it will integrate and I’ll have a breakthrough
I’m currently reverse engineering the process of tackling one specific negative belief and making a nice note for myself. I don’t really feel great about that belief and not really feel great about sharing it, but it’s also an act of confronting the reality and completely letting go of it, so here we go. If someone reads it, I hope this process will be as useful for them as it was for me (though, it was mostly subconscious for me until this point)
So the questions are:
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What exactly is being reconciled at the moment?
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What’s the source of this recon? I.e. lack of information (e.g. I want to build a habit but don’t know how to build habits), limiting beliefs, identity crisis, low habituation, belief-based action aversion (e.g I procrastinate starting working because I believe that I will feel uncomfortable (even if the work is actually pleasurable - in this case I’m talking about negative beliefs about the idea of work itself)). Maybe there are more sources of recon but these are what I noticed in myself at the moment
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What actions can I take to resolve this recon?
- Limiting beliefs → journaling and examining these specific beliefs, then reframing them.
For example, in my perception, work was akin to slavery. If I didn’t have to work, I wouldn’t, and if I do, I feel negative about it - I don’t want to do that but HAVE to.
Is work = slavery? Of course no - I don’t really have to work, there’s no one to punish me. I also can choose my own work. I can work to build something great, rather than work because I have to survive - same process, different feeling. I can work to achieve something I want, to feel fulfilled in the process, to improve within a specific craft, to use work as a catalyst for overall self improvement (e.g. focus training, creativity, discipline, etc.), I can use resources that I gain from work to fuel my other wants and needs, and to help others too (=spending money, charity), etc.
So, the conclusion is that work itself is overall a good thing. Just like reading books, learning languages, working out, etc. (all of the things that I’m enjoying)
- Lack of information → should be obvious - learning
I fixed my perception regarding work but I still procrastinate on it, mostly because years of previous negative perception are leaving an impact. Can’t just switch how I feel with a snap of my fingers, but also need to start working more to solidify new perception.
So how do I start working more? Well, for one, I can build a habit of it. Great, how do I build good lasting habits? Go read Atomic Habits and apply it
- Identity crisis → choose a new identity, take actions aligned with it (build up if necessary) and give it time to integrate.
Honestly, just implementing what I learned in the previous step and re-affirming new perception seems to be the answer. Small and consistent actions + time + subs
- Low habituation → action + repetition + time
Basically, it means that new actions are still not automatic, natural choices and doing them requires a higher degree of perceived effort. Again, it’s a matter of consistency and amount of action
In my case, if I want to habituate to work, I can either:
a) start working like a maniac for 12 hours daily, grinding through the initial suck but then my body and mind would adapt (because the brain is constantly looking for decreasing the amount of effort we spend, thus habituating specific actions, which reduces cognitive load and makes them easier). This is fast but hard method of habituationIt’s also like doing hundreds of cold approaches to get used to it
But imo it’s better to use this approach after building a solid “starting” habit. If the habit is too fragile, too much stress from this approach can break it
b) slower but more sustainable - atomic habits + time. Slower habituation due to lower amount of repetitions but way more sustainable and enjoyable.
- belief-based action aversion. For example, I avoid work and procrastinate on it because I think it will feel uncomfortable. Solution: building tiny habits, habituating, getting new experience which breaks this mental association
In my case, it’s showing up and doing the easiest, most pleasurable tasks, while drinking tea (I love tea), maybe listening to calm music or even having something in the background if it’s work that doesn’t require much thinking. Basically, creating as many positive associations as possible
Ultimately, the goal is to seamlessly move to new baseline, essentially undergoing a transformation
Depending on the amount of blockages, state of nervous system, initial beliefs and other things, it might be very easy and you’d have no problem with it (just like it was for me with language learning) or it might be extremely hard (just like it is for me with the idea of work lol)
Subliminals seem to aid every part of the process
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feeling down these couple of days. Part of it is related to not sleeping enough
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I think I’m beginning to see the path with subliminals. I’ve been having huge insights with my current problems that block success. Finally was able to reconcile some huge beliefs
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Just realized it’s soon a washout. It’s going to be my first 60 day cycle that I was able to finish in one go, without a washout in the middle. Progress? lol
Anyway, I’ll stop using the stabilizer a bit early to give it 12 rest days by the time I start a new cycle (as per stack rotation rules). And I’ll start washout somewhere around ~25th of August.
After that, I plan to microloop the hell out of stark black for a pretty long time, occasionally rotating it with the stabilizer.
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