@Prome,
Snap out of it.
You’re doing Khan ST1 Total Breakdown, a subliminal designed to completely break you down. You proceeded to overload your subconscious mind with 7~ loops of Love Bomb.
You are in deep reconciliation.
Let yourself process the input, then continue with Khan.
Then start developing your discipline. You have these dreams, but you lack the skill of discipline to achieve it. So start building it. Every single day start with 30 minutes, no matter what, of an activity that you know is good for you.
This can be working out, coding, working on your community, writing etc. It must be something that takes effort and will - you are training your skill of discipline. I recommend starting with working out.
And when I say no matter what, I mean you’ll be doing it for the rest of your life. Make that dedication, be fanatical about it, and do it. You want to be great? Then dedicate yourself fully, wholeheartedly, give yourself to the path of greatness.
There is no other way, no better use for your time, and no one else can walk this path for you. No one can drag you along it.
Take the leap of faith, do the sacrifice necessary.
As time goes on, it will get easier, and then you’ll start building out your day with more discipline and eventually you’ll find a mission, a purpose that you can pursue with both undying devotion and the titanium discipline you cultivated.
However, that is in the future. Focus on the now, which is…
To snap out of it.
Drop the drinking, the wallowing in negativity, let the subliminal input process, resume Khan and start training your discipline.
Forge the man you want to be, day by day, and on the path you’ll see… you’ve become him.
When you start to wonder whether you can take a break from the daily discipline, realize that each time you have such a moment you are at a crossroads between greatness and slinking back into more of the same, and that the answer is simple.
You want greatness - you choose it.
You’ve got incredible tools of self transformation and you’ve got a burning desire.
You are ready.
Walk the path of greatness, @Prome.