ABC333 Khan Black

[ABC333]

Day 7: 6 mins Alchemist Singularity

I didn’t realize it’s a listening day.

Nights

At work today, it just started making sense to go back to the original idea. Make a SI/CFW custom. Then I still have that third slot if I really wanted to experiment with a title.

I don’t want to jump ahead too fast. Since I plan spending a good amount of time on these two titles, it makes sense to just custom them. I can tweak it with modules to what I feel I most need now. I think that’s a better solution.

I’ve been seeing a lot more that other people get in bad work situations as well. So they end up having to find other jobs. I gotta keep in mind what I want. That got me thinking that it makes sense that I was so loyal to my friends in the past. When it comes down to it, if you have to be around people you would want to be around your friends more so than strangers who don’t have your best interests in mind. Also realized that my old friends weren’t the best influences either, kinda go caught up in the program as well. But I think it would have been the better situation, to be around friends. I pretty much lost all my friends when we all had to start working. Then even work friends I found out weren’t loyal either, they get caught up in those less than ideal influences around as well. I think SI will help me sort through more of that, and CFW as well. Just get me to a much better place so I get in the right places with the right people.

So yea, CFW/SI should have been my long term stack for sure. It’s not absolutely necessary that I have to find a full time job yet. But I think it’s on the horizon unless I find another way to make money. Still planning a year for sure with CFW/SI. I’m also on the road to Aeon. Which means I might run KB once more and then I gotta spend a few rounds with Alchemist first.

End of nights

Now I remember what came up earlier. I was seeing how some of my wishing I had friends may very well just be wanting a distraction from dealing with myself.

I was seeing how that tends to be the norm. Then the bully type stuff and wanting to pull others down is the same kind of thing. But that’s usually completely unconscious stuff. I’ve done so much work on myself yet there’s still things I need to take care of. Like if I check am I really living the life I want? So if I’m honest and the answer is a no, then I still have work to do. I think that’s what I call healing. That stuff seems to be surfacing, which has me desiring to get back to the feel good, fun, positive side of things.

I think that’s also where I started to disconnect from my friends. I was moving more towards authenticity, and they were still wanting to play the social game. Which tends to not be about authenticity. At least generally, which is why it also seems to be a thing of so many people in the mode of being lonely and wishing they had friends, like real connections. I used to tend to be friends with the outsider kind of people. They were just who they were kind of people and didn’t need to fit into a lot of the boxes. I thought I’d find people who had like awakenings, but then I find those people are all at their own stages, so it can still be hard to relate. So it’s still kind of an individual journey. Always coming back to ones’ self and eventually transcending the whole needing friends. More of like the now kind of thing. There’s no attachment or aversion to what is, and what is is perfect. In the meantime, it’s that inner work.

Oh I did stop at a drive through to get a burger before work. I was impressed with the guy who got my order. He was a younger guy but he had the right vibe and energy. I don’t know if I’ve ever got that good of vibe and energy from a customer service situation. When I pulled up to the window I just matched his vibe, I do that because they are much more likely to actually get my order right and hear everything correctly. Then I got to the window and he kept it going. I was impressed. He’s like what the ideal customer service should be, in my opinion. It wasn’t try hard or anything, it was just like yea, sometimes life does have nice surprises.

He even said my name. Here you go ABC333, as he handed me the bag. And I felt good about it, lol. That’s that How To Win Friends and Influence People thing, and it wasn’t delivered as like a trained thing and I think that’s why I felt good. Use people’s names.

[ABC333]

Day 8: No listening

Still stayed up til 5am again. Seems to be my new time for now.

I might have found a good reason to get me back on track with foundation training. I found out Charles Poliquin, a guy who trained many, probably the most olympic athletes at least at one time. He focused on working lower back strength. That transferred over to everything else. Some of the reviews on Foundation Training say that’s all they did for like an injury or rehab, and they came back to deadlift and their lifts when up just from FT.

Pavel T. the russian kettlebell guy, said what he gives people as a bare minimum is to work core strength and grip strength, and somehow that can help whole body strength. I have been thinking about adding in more core work with FT for the abs. Abs is something I haven’t worked much because I fell into the idea that you don’t need to work core if you do kettlebell swings. But even though I’m at a lower fat percentage my abs aint looking so good as a few years ago. Well, a few years ago I was hitting the Mcgill Big 3 to help come back from a back flare up and my abs looked the best. So I’m adding in some core work.

Evenings

Got the 10 mins of zone 2 bike cardio in. Followed immediately by 20 mins walking with weight vest. Now mobility and the main workout.

Feeling a bit low energy. My longest work day is Sunday, and so stamina/endurance building will definitely help me most on a daily basis. Still need some conditioning to be able to bounce back a little better.

Plus if I can get to bed just a couple hours earlier a night that will also help me.

I’ve got my SI/CFW custom ready to go. Just need to buy 2 modules and have it built. Planning for next cycle.

I decided to put in these modules, Limiting People Remover, Code of Loyalty, Attachment destroyer. I’m also including Rogue for the first time in a custom, as well as Potentiator. I think Potentiator will be good for the custom. So I think that will beef up the people focus, removing those unwanted people and preventing them from getting in my life is the idea. Also will have Safety Net and You are not alone for the positive, right people manifestation.

The Potentiator is about stopping you from repressing your power and potential, and instead allowing yourself to express and enjoy the endless possibilities that lie before you. You will not only become aware of all these possibilities you have, but also have ideas on how to best make use of them.

I think Potentiator module will help me with CFW/SI and also increase my success and abundance in many areas, or at least the most impactful.

Might be a little healing with my new module package choice. So I’ll also be including New Emotional Healing Experience module.

Though I might scrap the idea of CFW in a custom altogether. I’m still hesitant after my DRLD/LBFH custom. I made it 4 cycles but it was a bit rough.

Maybe a healing title will be something I run for 4 cycles and then I’ll try Chosen again instead.

I think that’s the ticket - run a healing title for 4 cycles. Then stick with one title that stays, and the third title is my health/fitness type title. Then the healing slot can be a title I want to try out and see how it works for me.

End of Nights

I’m going to have to switch my workout days around. Monday should really be a rest day, but Sunday is a long work day. So I don’t work out on Sunday either. I’ll do my legs on Tues/Thurs/Sat and do foundation training on MWF. I just have to work around my work schedule. So work might be a little slower because now my leg days will be on my work days.

All I did today was cardio, bike and walking. Didn’t even get the mobility. I was tired and just didn’t have the energy today. The staying up until 5am seems to be taking a toll. I’ll be in bed by 3am tonight though.

[ABC333]

Day 9: 1:30 Survival Instinct, 5 mins CFW

From my perspective this is another cycle that seems to be flying by. Day 9 already.

I did have some anxiety today. I also went to the grocery store and had some anxiety. But when I got in my car for the drive home, I was in the zone while driving. I was very aware and on point. I don’t drive as much as I used to lately. So I forgot that when I drive I used to get into the zone. So I got reminded of that last night.

It does make sense that if I’m focused on a goal, then anything in me not in alignment with that goal would be stirred up. Hence, the uptick in anxiety since being on SI. This time around I just think it’s hitting deeper. The first time I used SI I was also on CFW , and I was talking about how it was the best combo for anxiety. So it’s gotta be that Alchemist Singularity component that’s stirring things up this time. Which is good. Instead of having that junk running unconsciously, it’s coming to the surface so I can see that I still have room for progress and growth.

I did a round of foundation training last night, no mobility. I think that’s the best solution. Today I’ll get in my knee/leg workout. Along with pushups and pulls.

My anxiety seems to have been with me as long as I can remember. I guess I’m probably an HSP, and finding out the horrible things people do to each other and the planet, just had me take on some negative, fearful beliefs. So I’ve always had a bit of social anxiety. It’s just coming up today, and it’s a little rough. But if I really look at it, when I was working full time in those toxic workplaces, I was probably running at a higher daily level of anxiety. No idea how I did that. It wasn’t actually a good thing. So eventually, I’ll realize that right now is fine. There aren’t any problems. It’s all just old junk that has nothing to do with right now.

I did add a little L-theanine to the pre-workout today.

I remembered I have this bottle of Mood Bites, it’s saffron and a little niacin. It took one and it seems to have wiped away those anxious feelings. Saffron seems to be a good one for anxiety. It says you probably need to take it for weeks, but I took one of these and felt a little good when it got absorbed into the body. Although I found some people saying they get panic attacks after anxiety. Might be due to needing more magnesium. So I’ll keep these as needed. I’ve had this bottle for like a month or two, and today was the first day I felt like I needed to try it to take the edge off.

Nights

I made the mistake of looking at comments on some local news posts. Got pied in the face. It’s pure projection and usually they make it political, that’s one of the favs, everything is wrong and there’s only one reason for it. lol. It appears as there’s no sense of unity, it’s all just attack each other. Luckily, it doesn’t seem like that when I’m around people. But I don’t spend any time with them. Just in passing. lol I’m sure the easiest thing to find is people with opinions and drama. Man, I always get hopeful because I let go, so I bounce back. Then I get slammed to the floor again, lol. I tend to think people are generally good people and there’s a sense of we’re all in this together. But I tend to get proven wrong, certainly on the internet. I found that a lot of the people who are the most judgemental tend to have the dirtiest houses. But it’s this thing where a person doesn’t know what their own house smells like, it’s always a guest who says your house has a certain smell.

End of Nights

I got like 7 more reps on my exercises after not doing these exercises for a week. I didn’t get to pushups and pulls today. So I’m still having to dial in my time management.

[ABC333]

Day 10: No listening

More of a good day vibe today. So far.

Evenings

I may have to do grease the groove style training with pushups and pulls. That’s where you take your make reps on an exercise and cut it in half. And do like 4-6 sets throughout the day. But at least a half hour break between sets. So it’s not taxing but you’re greasing the groove, and will improve your strength almost effortlessly without the fatigue of going to failure. So for me that would be like 5 days a week doing say 100 pushups daily but 25 at a time just spaced throughout the day. It would allow me to improve and not have the problem of having to skip them because I didn’t manage my time effectively, or I was too low energy that day.

It’s kind of the micro-workout thing. But just for a couple exercises you want to improve upon. You can still train normally with everything else.

I’m also noticing my typing game has gone down lately. Like I will mis-type a word. So to me that’s a sign that it’s time to drop back to 30 seconds on Alchemist Singularity. And just bring it back up again. Maybe could also consider like a 10-14 day washout next break maybe. Give the brain and nervous system a little break, perhaps. Previously I would say every 4 cycles or so I would do a 10-14 day washout. But I’ve been wanting to keep at it and get all the benefits of my stack. But sometimes that does mean a little longer break just for good measure. Maybe I will just drop everything to 30 seconds to finish out this cycle and see how that goes. I haven’t done that before. Just kept pushing through.

End of Nights

Yea I’m gonna say I’m due for a longer break this time around. And I’ll try 30 seconds for the rest of this cycle. Feeling like my nervous system needs a breather. I’m feeling a little anxious this evening. I’d say more physical anxiety today. Could also be the new stimulus of maxing out reps. That and I stay up a couple hours too late for my liking.

Oh there’s some recent research that says rewatching your favorite tv shows and movies can regulate your nervous system.

Yesterday I watched a live replay of someone who doesn’t stream anymore. And it helped me tap into some good feelings. Sometimes I use like a livestream to fall asleep to, it’s almost like a meditation for me. So that’s a trick I’ll have to use. It does seem to give me a little boost and get back to the good side of things. That’s something I haven’t been doing. I’ve been trying to cut back my social media yet, because it doesn’t feel good. So I think the trick is to engage in those things that do feel good.

Did a guided relaxation. Feeling way better. But I definitely feel like I need sleep. Looks like a night off working out again. I might do a round of Foundation Training though but that’s it. Did the bike ride today. I put my up care for sale online and already had so many views and sold it already. So I was waiting around for that and interrupted my workout time.

[ABC333]

Day 11: 30 seconds Alchemist Singularity

Really tired today. Like I’d like to stay in bed sleeping.

I did a couple more reps on band pull apart movements on Monday. That hits the muscles and gets me sore. Hit the lats, shoulders, chest, and tris. A simple basic warmup movement but it just hits those muscles in a novel way I guess. I get sore from that but not really from pushups and pulls.

Evenings

I might swap CFW for Chosen next cycle after the 10-14 day break. Feeling like I want a break from the intense healing focus.

I’m also considering maybe love bomb or genesis joy next cycle. I’ve talked about a title to shake things up a bit. Just a nice break from healing focus. Something that is just positive and good feeling oriented.

End of Nights

Still feeling like I’m not on track with the workouts. No workout today just bike and mobility.

I looked at my physique in the mirror just now. Looking a little spartan-y I’d say. I gotta start working those abs and tighten up the midsection a bit. But I’m definitely pleased with how my body is looking.

I haven’t felt like doing keto lately. But I have anyway. I’m not having to force myself or anything. So there’s some aspect of discipline that seems to be at work on the diet front. Or maybe even just habit at this point.

I’ve been on a healing title for 6 months of this year, at least. I forget what I started the year on. But if I do swap out CFW, it might be for Sanguine. Just to take the edge off a bit and relax and feel good for a bit. Sanguine seems like a good title just for a little change up from the healing side of things. Plus I haven’t done a Survival Instinct & Sanguine combo yet. That’ll probably be great.

[ABC333]

Day 12: No listening

Yep. Those band pull-apart exercises got my lats sore today. I think they also work the stabilizer muscles or something. I don’t feel like it’s a look good exercise, definitely more “functional.” Good for shoulder health. They say you can do them as stand alone exercises for the muscles but I don’t think I’d get the same development as from rows and pulls.

Evenings

Still a little fight or flighty at times. As much as I want to push through and stick with CFW. I think it’s time for Sanguine instead of CFW.

It seems like more of the psychological and stuck emotion/energy variety. I still get some body shakes and releasing tension when I do my letting go work or get really relaxed.

I’ll be scanning the Alchemist forum to see if maybe it’s once again time to try Alchemist. I think that first stage could be highly beneficial, all stages probably.

Yea, maybe what I’ll try is a 10 day break this time. Followed by one cycle with only Sanguine and Survival Instinct, get a full cycle washout from AS, and plan to start Alchemist after that. Or, maybe just keep CFW and drop AS. I think AS is the toughest title in my stack for sure. Though I can’t sort of intellectualize it and put it into words.

Ok here’s what next cycle stack is looking like now: CFW, SI, Sanguine

I think if I was feeling more fighty than flighty it’d be a case where I’d go, maybe I run phoenix for a cycle just to blast through it. lol. I don’t feel up to that. It’s more like okay, time to pull the plug for a while and get myself back to being calm, and centered, and feeling safe.

Been into some true crime stuff on my social media feed lately. I don’t know how people take that in daily. Because I’m more of an HSP type, it just contributes to me being in fight or flight. I clean for a place that they help certain types of people. The workers come and go so often, and I can see why. It’s probably horrible stuff they hear about and have to deal with. Just being around “normal” people has been enough for me. Like that poor work environment people stuff seems too common. Then there’s the people who are so angry and say you need to just work, but they don’t realize for some people it’s at the expense of their mental health, and then that snowball effect.

I just want to get back to my center, and back to feeling good again really. That’s the first thing for me. From there I’ll have my creativity and resources available. Instead of feeling like I have to push through and just put up with things and people who won’t ever change and even bring others down.

End of Nights

I may finally build myself my version of the fabled Sanguine/Love Bomb custom.

I didn’t work out today. I’m probably going to be sleeping by 2am tonight. Definitely felt like another day I needed to just rest.

Still been a little rough at times feeling the more flighty side of fight or flight. I think Sanguine/LB is close enough to cfw with my own tweaks of course to make it custom. Another part of me wants to see if I can’t just continue on as is perhaps. But either way I think I’ll take a breather from AS and swap it for Sanguine at the very least. I feel like CFW is definitely the best healing focused title for me.

Not sure what it is, besides maybe AS is just really digging in there.

9 days left of this cycle. I still wonder if maybe I could keep SI and CFW at the same listening times. I do seem to get a little positive boost after my loops of those.

Lol. Just feeling a little ragged and it’s definitely breather time. So the best course of action might be to just finish out with 30 second loops of all my titles.

With more listening I feel like I could do this Quantum Touch healing. It’s about using universal Love as the healing energy. They say you can learn it in a day. Maybe with an in person instruction. Maybe I just haven’t felt confident in myself enough to try it out.

I think Sanguine would help very similar to Chosen vibes, just in a different way. I still feel like I have that inner work to do before a Chosen or an outer focused title.

I used to always listen to zpv2 titles at 15 minutes. I could assume possible overload from AS. I don’t know. Either way after this cycle it’s definitely 10-15 days off just to let things process and settle a bit.

After typing that I think it’s this objective from AS, combined with CFW, just making things a little tough for me…

Decipher your memories, traumas, beliefs and subconscious structures and see them from many different viewpoints - an incredibly powerful feature that, while not easy to use, will yield incredible amounts of growth.

It just seems to be at some background or unconscious level.

I decided to sit outside and smoke a cigar tonight. I used to do that every night after work last year. Only smoked a couple cigars this year. Putting on bug spray after my shower so I could sit outside just didn’t appeal. Now it’s cold enough for jeans and a sweatshirt at night. It was nice.

Felt like maybe I will be able to continue with my stack as is. I mean I really want the benefits of CFW, SI, and AS. But as usual, I’ll have to wait and see. Even if I take a break from AS, Sanguine is gonna be good too.

[ABC333]

Day 13: 2 mins SI, 5 mins CFW

Got some of that anxiety in my gut yet today. Seems manageable though. I may end up going another cycle without changing titles. I think if I keep AS to 30 seconds for a cycle that will be doable. I just want to get the most out of CFW and it’s more important to me than AS. Since I’m on cycle 4 of AS I would ideally like to keep going with it as well.

I decided to keep SI and CFW at the same listening times. I do feel slightly good after listening to my loops.

GLM looks like a must try for me. But I’ll just take it day by day for now. I think backing AS down to 30 seconds will alleviate my anxieties that have been stirred up lately.

I sold my car that I had for like 15 years. It was sitting for the last year. I kept planning to clean it out. Finally did a few days ago. Then I put it up for sale a couple days later, and it sold in like 4 hours. Just feels a little weird now that I sold it. I guess maybe just that I had it for so long. I guess that is a thing, people get attached to their cars and so it’s tough letting them go. I saw a few ladies cry after they sold their cars, lol.

Yep, yep. Seems to be a feel good element from CFW and SI.

That might tip the scales back to me looking at a CFW/Chosen custom.

AS can stay in the stack it seems. It’s just that instead of increasing 30 seconds every listen, for me, it’s probably best to increase by 30 seconds every cycle.

I think I’m still overcoming traumas from my people experiences from the past. Previously I had been feeling like being around people was a possibility again. Then I got into the murky waters. But keeping AS to 30 seconds for awhile might turn the tides back to more of the positive experience. But it did show me that there may be things below the surface still needing some work. For me that means finding the right intensity level I’m willing to tolerate, as I work towards the desired outcomes.

Previously I was kind of thinking that these fall months and right after the holidays, are the perfect time for some heavy healing. But it seems like the ideal is finding that level I can tolerate and just keep the healing as a constant component in my stack. But a title like GLM is intriguing, as it takes a different approach, not necessarily healing as we have previously though of it.

Nights

Just finished up a quick 10 min cycle. I went with the highest heart rate so far. I was at like 135-140 for the duration. Zone 2 for my age is 120 max. But since I’m eating carbs today and I didn’t ride yesterday, I felt good and just went with it. I feel refreshed. That felt good, man. I will stick to zone 2 except for the Saturday ride. Must be that “runner’s high” they speak of. I like it.

I’ve seen talk of sprinting pop up on my social media. I would like to sprint. I haven’t sprinted in way too long. I won’t risk injury. So I’ll stick with biking and trampoline and walking for now. Being smart would mean training the tendons first, making sure my body can handle sprinting. I do the trampoline making sure to stay on my forefoot and toes, no heal touching. I think that will help build those tendons and injury proof them.

Yep. Having those good day vibes tonight. I go this pop song stuck in my head. It’s from years ago and something I’d never put on a playlist. But it’s catchy, lol. You Get What You Give - by New Radicals.

End of Nights

As soon as the order on 2 modules is completed. I’m clicking purchase on building my SI/CFW custom.

[ABC333]

Day 14: No Listening

Have the life is good vibes to start the day. The trick for me seems to be to keep AS at 30 seconds for awhile and let CFW and SI lead the way.

End of Nights

Now I feel like maybe I just go for Dragon Reborn Red. I guess I still have to just be patient and see how things play out for me. I really like CFW/SI combo as long as I keep AS to 30 second loops for now. But with the holidays coming up, I dont want to dive into DRR. If I make the custom I think it’d be a waste to use it any less than 12 cycles. I feel like I’d be happy to make that commitment because I’m planning to run KB and Alchemist multi-stagers again to get to AEON. At the same time, once I get to KB or Alchemist I won’t be running any multi-stagers. Thus the CFW/SI custom options comes back into play. That was the plan. Luckily my module order is taking longer than 24 hours to complete, otherwise I’d already have the custom sent off to be built.

[ABC333]

Day 15: 30s AS

Cutting AS to 30 seconds really seemed to have backed off the anxiety for me. It seems combined with CFW, AS just pumps up the intensity factor of the healing.

Yea, as soon as my order completes. I can send off the custom to be built. I’m gonna go with it. CFW/SI custom.

Still sore in the lats. I think it’s a combo of the band pull apart exercises, which I though were just warmups. And I do like a some people call it an asian squat, for mobility. I hold a kettlebell for the last 15 seconds or so and do an isometric contraction while holding good posture. That’s also more effective than I realized. I thought I wasn’t getting that back work since I’ve been skipping foundation training sessions lately. So I’m still getting sore and I couldn’t figure out why. But apparently I’m still getting that back/posture work.

I’m also okay with just hitting a couple workouts a week. Once I hit my goal on reps, I’ll switch back to more frequent lower intensity work.

Evenings

Today I noticed that my sense of inner power has gone up a little. Good things from CFW and SI. When I read the new GLM thread, I really want to try that title though. But having the custom opens up an optional slot, so if I really wanted to I could try it. But I’m most likely going to try Beast Unleashed first. I feel like my joints still need some work to get rid of those slight aches and pains. I want to start hitting the heavybag but sometimes I still get those pains in my elbows. Knees don’t feel like they’re ready for running. But they tolerate the cycling and trampoline jumping so far.

I also see that instead of trying to be a super athlete mentality. I kind of see at work, I could use more work just being able to do things that I do in daily life. Say, bending over, squatting down and picking things up. That would be most beneficial to my daily life. Some of that stuff that would help, doesn’t really get addressed with normal workouts. It’s almost a thing where I’d have to be creative and come up with movements that will help me be better in daily life.

After making that quick entry, it reminds me that yea. I’m on the right path. Taking care of my body, building it up so I can feel good and be active in my body. Also working on those inner game things. So GLM can wait. If anything that’d be like the cherry on top, the icing on the cake. I’m finding that I’m not really drawn to seduction titles anymore. The money titles don’t seem so urgent either. I think CFW/SI is just, still, that right foundation for me.

I decided that I can find a good series to watch to help with SI. I started watching this show from the 90’s called The Pretender. This guy can be anyone he wants. He learns it all and then he goes out on missions to help people. Like he could be a doctor, a diver, a pilot, lol anything. Then I plan to watch this new spy series. I think it helps with how to think better. Like how they read situations and improvise and all that kind of stuff.

There was even a good scene in this episode I watched, where it actually had good banter. A little flirting perhaps but it wasn’t cheesy. It helps me tap in and see that yea, that stuff works in real life. And I can see how a little acting might be necessary to better navigate the people world. So this pretender guy is a good guy, he’s almost like say a sociopath, just the equal and opposite. So instead of manipulating people to get ahead for his own benefit, he’s doing good and he has a heart. Also a bit of a Chosen element to the character.

Nights

Anxiety was kicked in slightly today. Also have some memories of old work situation coming up. Slight anger around the work situation. It just makes no sense to me that I was a do my job, mind my own business kind of person. Then had some people decide I was a problem and tried to make my life difficult. I’ll be happy when those solutions come to mind, or wisdom on how I can prevent such things from happening again. To me it was that I did inner work and attained certain things, and they had zero understanding besides I wasn’t like everybody else. I never considered myself above anyone, but still found myself in crab bucket work situations. Where if a crab gets to the top of the bucket and is getting out, the other crabs will pull that crab in. Whereas other creatures may have more of a work together situation to overcome challenges, thus benefiting their population, rising together.

After AS, may have slight anxiety. After CFW/SI, I may be feeling like life is good.

End of Nights

Feel like I made some progress. I got a little insight on lust. I’m happy that lust seems to have been turned down. Seeing that some of the women I went for in the past was purely out of lust. I still have a sex drive but I think it’s just getting transmuted. Maybe some KB still in play.

Also today I was feeling a bit like a fighter. So there’s some taking on of that warriorness. I guess that’s SI, or a combo of spartan still at work maybe. But on Spartan I didn’t have that feeling like a fighter or warrior like what I was feeling a little earlier.

Also was having some thoughts of just guy stuff I guess. Like you picture an emergency and how you’d handle it. Then I realize well that’s not happening now, but just shows me that the gears are at work.

Moving through the anxiety/fear kind of stuff and getting a taste of the next level up. So beliefs are getting dealt with and energy moving.

[ABC333]

Day 16: No listening

A little anxiety again today. With an aversion to social media. I think maybe the process of dissipating the old energies of unresolved or stuck stuff, makes me a little sensitive to “energy” and so social media just isn’t a feel good thing, generally. I get a lot of true crime stuff, and scary info, and what’s wrong with the world in my social media feed. Even though I attempted to set it up so I’d get at least fun, if not positive stuff.

I have done more of the parasympathetic breathing, starting yesterday. It’s called a psychological sigh, or even Dragon’s Breath I think. You take a sharp quick inhale through the nose trying to fill your lungs with a full breath, then you do another one to top off. Then you just slowly exhale through your mouth.

I do that 5 mins before the bike ride. I do it after the bike ride. Then I do it before the main exercise portion as well. After mobility.

Then I do some box breathing for 5 mins and a 5 mins of 4 count in 8 count exhale later in the day. I think I’ll keep that up just to help train the body to be in parasympathetic more often.

I may even try and do 15 seconds of AS instead of 30. It could be a title I’ve gotta micro loop as long as I have a healing title in the mix. Also has me considering maybe a move to regular Alchemist would be better for me.

Nights

I might actually switch Alchemist Singularity for the new GLM. Then start the new year with either KB or Alchemist multi stager.

My legs feel like they got a good workout already. I have some cossack squats in my mobility session. I felt like I got into some really good mind muscle connection today. I was focusing on getting lower into those hips on the cossack squats. Other exercises too I noticed increased mind/muscle connection.

So it’s only pushups and pulls after work. Knee/Leg workout will be tomorrow.

[ABC333]

Day 17: 2:30 SI, 5 mins CFW

7 hours of sleep. Got woken up early, had company.

I don’t have the energy for the workout I wanted. But I’ll just see what I can accomplish anyway.

My 2 custom module order took so long to get finalized. I’m kinda glad it did. Now I feel like I’ll wait until the end of the year to decide on a custom. That gives me more time with CFW and SI, and next up is GLM. That’ll give me a better idea if I feel I’ll want to continue with CFW for a full year commitment. Or if I’d like to go with a regular Chosen custom.

Took the day off working out. I’m going to get a quick round of foundation training in tho. I forgot I was planning on mwf as foundation training days. So I didn’t actually miss the workout I was thinking I did.

I decided that next cycle I’ll just run SI and CFW for a cycle. To get that 30 days off AS before starting a new title. That way I won’t have to take an extended washout after this cycle. Since CFW and SI seems to give me more positive feelings instead of stirring stuff up.

[ABC333]

Day 18: No listening

End of Nights

I decided at work that I gotta go with Sanguine next cycle. I’ll just start it at 30 seconds and move up from there. I remember last time I did Sanguine and I didn’t think it was as good as it used to be. So I think that’s because I jumped straight into 15 mins. When ZPV2 stuff came out I was still doing everything at 15 minutes. But I’ve since learned that yea starting at 30 seconds and moving up from there is probably the best course, for me.

I think the thoughts that want to associate with the anxiety are getting less impactful for sure. Seems to be possibly some stuck energy or something. I think it’s started to be freed, thus my awareness of it and the increased anxiety lately. It’s lower than it was. But I think it’s still time for Sanguine.

I finally did 20 minutes of my feel good meditation. Where when you notice a good feeling you stick with that feeling and just keep bringing your awareness back to it. It’s a passive thing and so simple but something I’m going to keep doing. Just to retrain that feeling good aspect.

[ABC333]

Day 19: 30s Alchemist Singularity

Tired today. 7 hours of sleep again. I was up until 6am last night.

Yea, Sanguine will be nice to get some of that relaxation into the mix. No anxiety today, just wish I would still be sleeping.

End of Nights

A little too much going on with company this week. I decided to take a week off keto. Still getting in the bare minimum on workouts this week.

The new Wanted looks great. I may have to rethink my plans. I think I will go with CFW for a fourth cycle, SI for a second, and I’ll bring in Sanguine instead of AS. So I’ll get nice and relaxed and feeling good again and get everything calmed down for the next cycle. I’d like to get 4 cycles of SI, that seems to be my number before switching still. But yea, I think Wanted will get a spin very soon. I think the relaxation and joy scripting will be great. It also just seems like what I would want to have for my ideal attraction stuff as far as objectives. I think the physical shifting will be good as well. It’s also got voice improvement. Looks like a winner.

I’ve been kind of seeing lately how I wasn’t raised by people who weren’t real connectors. Yet I haven’t seemed to get those true connections either myself. Like I was loyal, and other people weren’t. I was honest and nothing to hide but other people had ulterior motives and just playing a game to get ahead kind of thing, or get outside approval to make up for lack. But it does seem like those true connections are rare. And I think that’s really what I’d like to find yet. So for me most social interaction is kind of that mask wearing stuff, or just to get the ego gratification, or playing out unconscious programs. I just find that I have an aversion to that kind of thing. I’m not a big judgemental version and yet that’s a bit of the norm, so if you don’t engage in that, other people tend to assume you think you’re this or that, when they have no clue. Just playing out their own biases and programs, and so that’s another reason I don’t judge or engage in arguments. I just would like to have those true connections. lol, another case for Inner Circle, which has again, fallen off my radar as of late.

Still feeling like I have that inner work to do. I think mainly just getting my nervous system to feel safe and okay. That seems to be the challenge. That’s why SI, and CFW, and Sanguine is my stack starting next cycle.

On the wardrobe front… I have been eyeing this new work jacket for a few years. I was going to save money and get it. Then I decided a work vest might be better. I can just wear my old jacket. But now I see a black leather jacket I want to get. I never had a leather jacket and I haven’t seen too many around recently. Earlier this year I got a black leather blazer because I got a good deal. But it’s too light to be a jacket on the cold days around here.

[ABC333]

Day 20: No listening

Anxiety hasn’t crept up yet after AS. I went to the store last night, and I did get anxiety just at the stores though. I used to get that all the time. Now I think it just got stirred up thanks to the work of AS. So it’s not a constant thing.

I decided to buy the leather jacket. It’s used. But it’s a good deal. I just like it. All I was wearing was a zip up thermal hoodie and a vest when it gets cold. But for whatever reason I wanted something a bit more stylish and cool.

I think my next title will be GLM after I feel like it’s time to switch of CFW. Maybe I’ll only get 4 cycles of SI just as a refresher. Then I’d like to try maybe the GLM, Genesis Joy combo before Wanted, just to ensure that I get the most out of Wanted. I want to run it but I don’t feel like during the winter months is best for it. To start the year or in spring would be best. I like SI for winter months. It also has some immune boost during that cold/flu season.

The challenging family member seems to be easing up a bit. They still communicate in a way that tries to make me out to be wrong no matter what, even if it isn’t a true intention, more their habit program. I don’t get firm I just don’t get reactive and just keep sailing, and they kind of soften up their tone a bit. CFW influence. Also SI has leadership stuff.

---

lols. That new Wanted looks great. Ideally my stack would be GLM, Wanted, and I’m planning to take on Alchemist to start the year.

So I gotta stay at it. I will probably run Chosen. I might even do Chosen, CFW, SI to end out the year. I think Chosen has enough positivity to overcome any anxiety. I think it’ll be good to finish the year on that stack. A bit more positivity. Plus Chosen has the bonus of being attractive to business/professional women, for me at least. Now if I can just get invited to some of those office holiday parties! lols.

[ABC333]

Day 21: 3 min SI, 5 min CFW

I just read through GLM thread and it just seems like the better title for me, before I try Chosen again I think.

No feeling like I need an extended washout anymore since dropping Alchemist Singularity to 30 seconds.

Maybe I’ll just try Beast Unleashed to reignite the momentum in my workouts after having a couple off weeks.

Lol now I’m thinking Chosen again. Chosen at 30 seconds and just slow roll it.

I saw jealousy in myself yesterday. I was looking at people and noticed I was jealous. Maybe deep down that part of me that thinks it was wounded just sees them as being able to have normal lives, and jobs without getting the hassle and unwanted attention that I did. I guess basically I see people in general as being programmed for the conflict, and so they almost thrive on it. In fact they create it out of thin air because that’s the program.

Jealousy is not something I ever saw in myself, maybe like once or twice. So that might tell me that we did get deep with Alchemist Singularity. Oh that’s what it must be.

Recently I was finally accepting that yea for whatever reason some people are jealous and that’s part of the unwanted attention stuff I had to deal with from others. Just a case where generally people can’t see what the real cause of their upsets and triggers is, it’s not actually the event. But so many people believe that the outer is what controls their inner. It looked like that to me too when I was getting harassed and stuff. If only they could see beyond their program they’d leave me alone. But I also had to realize that yea, no changing them, unfortunately walking away was the best thing.

Many people get stuck in lives, and jobs they feel like they can’t get out of, thus compounding their experienced misery which they’ll then project onto others.

I am still basically hermit mode loner and sometimes still get anxiety just going out around people. So I think Chosen is probably good because it gets that positive attention, and in conjunction with the inner work will go along away for me.

———

Just saw this cool post. It said something like, you never see guys who actually compete in sports argue about working out or exercises. It’s the ones whose only physical activity is being in the gym who are the triggered ones.

Evenings

I was into some anger today. Not the external act out kind. Just that I rose up past the anxiety. Upward progress on the emotional scale.

I decide at work I need to do KB again. But then I realized that, yea, it’s Sanguine time. It’s too close to the holidays to try more healing. Sanguine is the best bet.

I want life to be fun again. Before the crab bucket tried to pull me down and stomp me out. So I’ll be looking at Primal again. I still have to consider new GLM.

I’m feeling like it’s time to dust off Primal and give it another run. Trade CFW for Primal. I felt like that title was pretty good to get rid of anxiety as well. Also not being bothered or worried with what other people might think of me.

So it looks like I’ll keep AS. AS with CFW healing was a bit much. So in theory I should be fine with Primal instead of CFW.

[ABC333]

Day 1 of 5: No listening

A little of the feel goods today. So at that rate I’ll have to keep CFW and SI in the stack. Planning to trade AS for Primal starting next cycle. I think I’ll keep all titles at 30 seconds for a cycle just for a bit of a breather and to give some space for any processing queue.

With new Wanted looking so irresistible, I think Primal is the way to go. It’ll lay some groundwork and plus it’s said to be a title that may be more well rounded in terms of applications.

Maybe I’ll go with new GLM though. Seems like it’s the ticket for what I most need right now.

Alright, GLM locked and loaded into the playlist. GLM wins.

Nights

Having some feelings come up now. So I decided to do a 15 day washout. Last one was 4-5 months ago, where i took at least 10 days off.

Was feeling good the first few hours of the day. Now I just feel like I’d rather be in bed sleeping. I did get a full night sleep, like 9 hours. I’ve probably had some deep work going on in in the unconscious background with AS and CFW.

I saw this man the other day. It just hit me that even though he has more money than me, he probably has a family, wife and kids. That he wasn’t higher status then me, certainly not energetically. Maybe some CFW/AS insight. I think that’s part of why I was never able to fit into work situations. School was fine, had friends, only when I had to work did I have these toxic people situations. I think that they could see something in me, an yet in my reality I never saw myself as any different than anyone else. So they could see my potential and wanted to stomp that out. These were more of the lifers at jobs who wanted to move up in those worlds. I never did because of the people issues.

I always felt like my main issues with toxic people started after I went the spiritual route. I wanted that happiness that depends on no other or outer. I got a taste of that and in this world, that was wrong, even though the people who said the bad things about me, were the ones saying and doing the bad things!

End of Nights

Definitely a rest and recuperate day. No workout. My plan was to hit the ground running this week. But Monday might be a day off, it has been for a few weeks.

Maybe the energy is still working through blocks or something.

Depending on how the 5 days goes. I might just do next cycle with 2 titles. Unless I end up taking more than five days off. I do feel like CFW and SI would be great alone for a cycle. It’d give me some time off AS then I could start GLM in 2 cycles.

[ABC333]

Day 2 of 5: No listening

Today I just went for it and slept as long as I could. I probably got 10 hours.

I was kind of exhausted the last two nights around bed time.

Going to get the bike ride in and mobility first thing. I think it is better for me to start my day with my workout. Then I have it done. Still have some resistance to just doing it for some reason.

I feel like 15 days off subs would be good for me. I would like to get my energy back. On the libido front I feel like I still have some. But I think it’s still getting transmuted working on some healing or something. I’m finally starting to let the eggplant title be a possibility. I’d like to wake up with that strong eggplant. Lately I don’t have those strong morning oaks and as a man, I just want that back. Again I don’t have any release, don’t feel the need or desire. So I’m on like another 30 day run of no pmo. Not planned just happening and in progress.

Maybe I will go forward with just Sanguine and SI when I start up again. Take a little breather to finish out the year. Lately feeling like I need lots of rest again.

I got a 3 card oracle reading from this lady I know on the social media. Normally I don’t get readings, they’ve never been accurate for me. But this one was. It saw something like I like to be independent and don’t connect with the crowd, what everybody else is into. That I might be being called to leadership in a way. I forget the rest. But it was just accurate for me.

Today I feel like I could push the washout to 30 days. I’ll take it day by day. I think 15 for sure just to washout and reset a bit. I’ll even consider sticking with CFW of course, and I think it’ll be either Sanguine or Genesis Joy for the third title to finish the year.

End of Nights

I had some slight loneliness come up. Also there’s been some of that thing where I’m just not attracted to women I was anymore. Tonight I realized that I’d say I have more of a full palette of emotions. So that would correlate with CFW. Maybe I was a bit blocked up and that’s why so much anxiety in the past.

Here’s the CFW objective:

Develop the ability to automatically harness your emotions — positive and negative — to inspire those you lead to achieve their maximum potential

Also I would say I’ve been feeling burnt out lately. No workout today. Just the bike ride.

I want to let CFW and SI do some work. So I’ll definitely be dropping AS. But I might actually go with Beast at 30 seconds for some of that primal energy boost.

I was also thinking that I haven’t been taking 2 weeks off before switching titles. So I might want to start doing that from now on. I think knowing that I’d have to take 2 weeks off would make me have to be really sure I want to drop or add a title.

I was also thinking today that maybe I need to just get outside more. Definitely been staying indoors almost all the time lately. So I’ll have a cigar under the stars tonight just to wind down.

I’ve also found that at times my vibe is a slight positive one. So CFW is definitely at work. I would like to finish out the year on it for sure.

[ABC333]

Day 3 of No Listening

7 hours of sleep. Feeling a little positive again so far today.

Feeling optimistic and maybe like Chosen would be a good third title for the rest of the year. I plan on Wanted and GLM and either KB or Alchemist starting the new year.

So I can get some good work in with CFW/Chosen in the meantime.

Yea, I’m feeling some aliveness today. Like things are possible.

Welp, seems like a good time to be on Survival Instinct. Things appear to be heating up in the political people world. Maybe we’ll get one of those fall/winter’s of “love” as they say.

Just skimmed the Chosen copy. It says it helps build deep connections. Ideally I’d pair it with IC, but for now I think yea, it looks like I’ll be happy with it. Ironic since I have a circle of zero at the moment, lol. I realize it may be best to meet new people anyway, I have to let go of hope that it’d be a good thing to have all my old friends back. It’s been proven to me time and time again, that that’s not the direction to go. Anybody who wanted to stay in touch, well there are none. I used to be the put in the effort, loyal guy. But many of them get caught up in the typical drama type stuff with no aspirations for inner work and those higher aspirations that would probably leave one the odd man out from the crowd.

I finally saw the phenomenon yesterday, where I was driving by. And an old lady standing in front of her house was standing with her arms crossed. We made eye contact, and I guess she sensed my vibe, and then kind of dropped her hands to her sides. Going from that maybe guarded to open posture. That’s something I’d seen the first time I ran Chosen, CFW, SI. Where some people would pick up on my vibe and sort of let their guard down.

Chosen & Wanted would be a whole new ballgame. Man.

I realize that Chosen, CFW, and SI might be my titles. I really could have used that stack back in my toxic work situations. Immune to the herd negativity and building connections with those people who saw the good in me. Maybe that good could have rubbed off with a bit of that LBFH effect, and I wouldn’t have been the sole point of projection. Maybe could have drained the will to fight out of some of the negatives, they’d have to be the ones to go elsewhere. I dunno. Just throwing spit balls while I procrastinate on working out again. I’ve been improving on the do it now habit. Don’t think, just get moving.

End of nights

My cat laid on me and purred for like 5-10 minutes. I can’t remember the last time he did that. I would attribute that to some positive vibe change.

[ABC333]

Day 4 no listening

I’m kind of opening up to more titles. Like OG stark. I could see myself trying that one out.

For now I gotta go with Chosen and CFW, because I like CFW, and Chosen is its companion title.

I’m realizing that CFW has some of those Love Bomb and Sanguine components, so rather than add those to the stack, I’ll let CFW just work that out.

I have noticed that with all the crazy going on in the media/news lately, I am not getting caught up at all in the emotional reactions that appear as the norm. I feel like it was perfect timing to get back on CFW and SI. I can see it, but at the same time I don’t even feel the need to comment on any of it. I guess part of it might be seeing that when people aren’t rational, there’s no sense in getting involved if you don’t need to. No immediate danger to myself or loved ones, it’s just emotional argument and name calling and ill wishing. Literally have seen people wishing death and cancer on each other and they’re serious. Over differing opinions/beliefs.

Also noticing my challenging family member seems more self aware of her communications with me. It’s not that I even argued about it. I brought it up maybe a year ago, but didn’t seem to help. Just running CFW seems to be smoothing things out.

I noticed I’m more focused on my How To Win Friends summary audio if I listen while at work. If I play it during the day it’s just like background noise and I don’t focus on it. But that could also be due to taking alpha gpc before work, since it’s not stimulant and helps focus.

Fell off the keto wagon already. But this week was a little unplanned. My dad’s woman passed away so there was a funeral yesterday. Haven’t gotten back into working out just yet either. Still getting better at the whole do it now thing. I heard Brian Tracy and some other guy talk about it. It’s just when you think of what you have to do you just say I do it now and immediately get into action. I still have some resistance to getting into action sometimes. It’s like I can workout but then I want to rest and recover, and that’s the thing about higher intensity training. But at least lately I’ve been getting in the 10 minute bike ride most days if nothing else. Also it’s been easy to start a meditation practice again. I can do that for 35 minutes to start the day.

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Feel like I’ll definitely go 7 days no listening.

Maybe I’ll even just do CFW and SI for a cycle.

I am feeling some heightened anxiety tonight. I did have an extra 100mg of caffeine at 7pm, for a total of 300mg for the day. So I am comfortable attributing the anxiety to the extra caffeine today.

End of Nights

At work I got the idea that Primal should get called back up. Primal is winning again.

[ABC333]

Day 5 no listening

I think I’m set on Primal now. Trade AS for Primal.

Because when I get to the new year, I’m doing either KB or Alchemist. And I might run the first stage solo, or one title. That would be Primal if it’s KB for sure. Plus it would help lay some groundwork for new Wanted which sounds amazing. I don’t think it wise to start a 3 title stack all at once. Plus I like the idea of running the first stage of a multi-stager solo.

I would like to get to Wanted Black one day. I think that’d require a year of Wanted, for me at least. To feel like I’m ready for that WB.

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Earlier today I was having a bit of an internal struggle, Chosen or Primal. I’m sticking with Primal because it has some anti-anxiety and seems to be more my style. There’s still the independent side who definitely doesn’t follow the crowd. I’ll just let CFW continue the healing and give it the Primal treatment. I do plan to take it nice an slow though. 30 second increases per cycle to ease into it.

2 weeks off from the workout programs. I should be fully recovered and ready to get back into it starting Monday. I had 6 hours of sleep last night. Got in a half hour nap today, it was a deep sleep too.