Currently in washout Day 3
Next cycle I’ll switch Heartsong for LB
I’ll let it bloom a bit before taking it back again
Also I plan to still use my Custom that has wanted in it but I’ll altern the use of Strictly Wanted zp just to see more of it’s specific effects like physical shifting
So next cycle : Custom/Wanted and LB
Day 5 washout
I’ve been having plenty ideas about theorical next steps in coming months
Getting Khan
Making a custom with plenty boosters and a few modules to help my manhood grow to unamable height (yeah only making this one for fun and if money flows, maybe even in zpt2, I guess I’d dream about my manhood to height never seen before 
)
Custom to develop things about love matters
On multiple level Zp, ZpT and ZpT2
For different usage and different rest period in between
Custom about more sexual matter along status depending on how khan goes or a mix of khan and love stuff
Got plenty of little ideas to explore, just needed to make some more decent money to go for it
7 Days washout ended
Did 3min of both custom and LB
So far so good, felt some heat and good feelings around my chest
I think I might go for 3 mins only this month except for one or two 7 mins on wanted
Might go for 5 min next month and so on
Dreamt about someone who have felt love for me but I really didn’t return those feelings because she simply wasn’t my genre at all, good friends but that’s it
It’s the first time I dream about her, I don’t even understand why I did, maybe to remember that I’m always in an abundance of love? Might just not always comes from where I want but I’m always loved.
Also I keep having this feeling that I was cheated on just one time with one of my closest friend(in dreams) , I perfectly know that it couldn’t be the case.
It seems that I’m healing from some kind of feelings of inferiority toward that friend
Really considering getting khan for cycle 4 or 5
(currently starting cycle 3)
Keep seeing the ram and mountains on readings and such
Along with breakthrough/symbolism of having gone through the fire
Even in my last dream I was doing lot’s of climbing
Am powering through stuff I know 
Dreamt that I was taller and more muscular
I seem to integrate Wanted physical shifting better with those 3 mins
Definitely getting Khan
There’s a inner guidance a strong feeling that this year is my grant debu with that sub I never thought I’d run
But considering that I’m making also my grand debu in life, I feel more and more the urge to develop that man in me
Being that dude that surf and creates the wave
When I’ll start khan I feel that I’ll need a new journal
My manifestations always have felt slightly random
But now it’s at the level of me playing a bit at Hotline Miami 2 for a few hours some days ago
And now I keep earing sounds/music from the game every now and then
I think I’m growing a bit
People around me seems to express their emotions easier than when I’m not around
I think I’ve became even more some kind of cathaclist (is it even English???)
I forgot how much LB just feel so good
Like I try and try to feel a ton of lust and I end up almost not feeling a damn thing
I play 4 loops of 3min and woooply Doop
Here is heaven’s sent libido
I must be an angel then 
Lust never truly was enough for me to act upon it
Neither felt right on it’s own
And love DAYUM!!!
Gotta take note to stay on LB upon my futur khan up veiling
Did you had an heartgasm?
I did, was the best
Note : not on LB thought it could help??
Khan’t wait to play st1 to puke bullshit out of my being
I feel so much excitement at that idea
It’s a long due processus I should’ve started long ago, I owe it to myself
Wanted
Played 15 mind loops last time, gotta say it made me tired
I’m in need of so much food bruh
And when I wake up I’m looking like I barely ate anything looking slick like a model
Gotta eat even more
Wanted & LB
Feeling more peace and stability tho
I’m able once again to enjoy physical contact like I used to, that’s a great thing
Is that Luv Bomb you have… in your pocket? 
It’s for sure
A Luv Bomb
At least that’s what I ear 
Just putting this out here, it’s really personal even tho there is not much details, because I can’t wait to get a new notebook to enter those thoughts
Damn I knew it but bro do I have a humungus fear of success, feels almost like trauma
It’s so obvious, as soon as I feel like a dude that has it all, everything in subs kicks in even harder, results, manifestation, etc…
Annnd shortly after, anxiety arises
Why… WHYYY…
I honestly think it started in my childhood obviously, I was that child that noticed that by not asking much I got praises, so obviously it became natural, I’m sure a lot of you know just too well about what I’m talking, and I reinforced that to over 9000 over pretty much all my life except in the last few years
Now every single time I shine I find ways to block it out and ruin it just enough to stay in the shadows
Bruh f’ it
That’s a big reason why I got Khan and that I am really impatient to play st1
I really need to let that old vison of the world burn to ashes
If I shine I ain’t gonna die, better I’ll really live for once
If I get what I want I won’t ruin everything, I’ll be enjoying, I’ll breath
God damn it I deserve it, I won’t even abuse it
So why is it so hard
No I know
It’s because I’m building my character from ground 0 (or even minus 100)
As a teenager I was so transparent that when I played sport I could walk behind someone and sprint shortly to get the ball that this someone should’ve have received, worse they panicked because they didn’t felt a damn thing
I’ve got plenty of stories like that
It wouldn’t be for my hair color that makes me noticed that I want it or not, I’d be the ninjiest guy on the planet against my will
I think I need one of those therapy walk to nowhere alone to shout with all that I have in my heart
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Washout after a bit more than half a cycle
Because Frick I wanna get that Khan in ma brain
I plan to do something like that :
Day 1 : Khan st1
Day 2 : Rest
Day 3 : Khan st1
Day 4 : Rest
Day 5 : 3min Wanted + 3min LB
Day 6 : Rest
Day 7 : Rest
Repeat
That way healing can happen 2/3 of the time and I get some reward for going through it toward the end of the week
Currently in day 8 or 9 of rest /washout
I’ve observed that I have the biggest results when I’m ball’s deep into recon it’s true only for zpv2 tho
I don’t know why this is a thing but it is
I’ve observed it each time I start grinding to my personal limit of listening time, Wich has become incredibly low BTW
I’ve tried 3 mins, I for sure don’t go into recon but telling if there is inner shift or results is hard, I can observe a tiny bit every now and then but it feels and is just too slow for me
I’m scratching my head trying to figure out how should I go about it…
Because recon is really not fun nowadays, it used to be slight headaches and tiredness
Now it’s total confusion, tiredness kaiyoken 10 times, some despair, etc etc
I’m still able to tell easily when I’m into recon territory but bro I don’t wanna be in it to have cool results
HHHUUUMMMMMMM
I’m glad I’ve started doing TWIM tho it feels really nice, first time I just cried and looked ugly, felt liberating, was really awesome 10 outa 10
It sure helps navigate recon more easily
Okay now my point on Zp vs Zpv2
If course don’t take it as ultimate, it’s my personal experience that I’m about to describe here
I’ve experienced a compound effect on zp, it start ‘’ slowly’’ (still acting quickly but slower compared to zpv2), but the effects add up the more and longer you play the sub. It’ s progressing like snowballing
For zpv2 I’ve found that in a matter of 1-3 loops or at max 1 cycle (but more often than not 1-3 loops), I got the full script blasting on at max effect
I’ve experienced 0 to none compound effect tho, to me it’s more a matter of keeping and staying aligned with the script by my own will and actions that helps cement the effects, or else I would have to go into recon territory to experience similar results
I really experience a difficulty finding the sweet spot with zpv2, it looks like I still can’t find it after 3 months
I’ve yet to use a sub like Ascension chamber to help the subs compound, I think I’ll try it after my Khan st1 cycle(s), so I still need to experience there
On another hand I think it has become even more critical to just listen to my intuition and instinct on zpv2 for the listening pattern, therefore I won’t impose one in the future, might go for 1 loop a week or more or less, I really don’t know
So brievly
Zpv1 : snowball faster than all previous tech (Wich had more a brick by brick feeling rather than snowball)
Zpv2 : here’s the f*ING house/manor but you gotta learn it by yourself how to maintain and keep it up, otherwise it start to fall apart, wich for me is harder
Zpv2 is better in all aspect to me except ONE
Big point : it’s so damn hard to dose it
Gotta find that sweet spot baby
