Vivir Mi Vida - Matalexander305

Journals - Custom Subliminals
#14

Tomorrow I can resume exercising, is one day going to kill me? NO

Sure I can, while my nose is still healing, it won’t cause an infection or anything else. (I searched it up)

Yes I can, I can still drink coffee and use whitestrips. Just need to drink water w it to rinse my teeth and brush them after to prevent staining.

I literally bought whitestrips 2 years ago and haven’t used them until now all because I thought I’d have to quit drinking coffee… I’ve been drinking c4 pre workout for the last week because of it :rofl:

See what I mean? I place these artificial limitations on myself way too often.

#15

Funny you say that, I’ve been thinking about that🤔

1 Like
#16

You know what, I just read the CFW sales page and it’s exactly what I need right now.

I was going to run Ql st2 today, but I just changed my mind. That can wait.

Thanks @Deadpool

1 Like
#17

You are welcome, no problem. I am just gonna send you the number of my bank account and you can send me the amount of money of your choice :slight_smile:

1 Like
#18

LMAOOOO OKAYY HAHAHAHA

#19

LBFH does EVERYTHING the description says. I’m actually blown away, this sub is a masterpiece.

I played 2 loops so far. After my first loop, I dropped my ego, I was kind and approachable to others. I was going out of my way to say hi to people, smiling at everyone, holding doors.

People were also unusually kind to me. Maybe it sounds weird, but I’ve never had so small many interactions with people. I usually am very closed off, and just keep to myself. I’m also not very approachable and don’t often smile. But when I changed that, it’s like everyone’s suddenly talking to me lol.

I’m almost uncomfortable with how lovey dovey and kind I feel. I’m not used to being this positive. But I kind of feels good lol

7 Likes
#20

As for CFW, I wasn’t even halfway through the first loop and I already began thinking of past situations that pertained to the themes of CFW.

And one thing that’s different about the healing here, is how positive it feels. I think LBFH is also a large factor here, but I feel so strong and mature when I re examine these situations. And I’m discovering new lessons, blind spots, things I missed.

This is really something profound, I can actually feel myself healing and consciously see myself healing.

Total breakdown was a brutal, it was all over the place, I had no idea what was going on, I didn’t even know what was being healed. With CFW, I know exactly what’s being worked on and I love it.

4 Likes
#21

Maybe TB would be easier if you try it after some time on LBFH and CFW.

#22

Already did 3 months of TB

1 Like
#23

Alright new update:

Went downtown last night for a buddy’s birthday celebration. Was the first time going out in while, like it’s been at least 3 months. And because I’m really starting to feel khans power on st3, I was excited to see how things would go.

So first thing, last night was the first night I really felt put together. Like my outfit was on point from head to toe, and my fragrance was fucking intoxicating. (Side effect -Initio)

So my Uber dropped me off in front of a popular club, and theirs always a line up outside. When I got out… I just felt sexy asf. Like on some celebrity type shit lool. I could feel people staring at me.

And sure enough when I looked around, I caught a few girls starring at me with that classic deer in headlights look haha. I love it. It’s always surprising yet normal in a way. Part of me is like “Yeah of course they’re staring” and the other part of me is like “Wtf is going on right now, is this even real?”

Anyways, the party was at a bar downtown. Lots of new faces, so I took it as a opportunity to talk to some girls (and guys too, but mostly girls)

Continuing…

5 Likes
#24

So for most of my life, I’ve been a rather quiet and timid kind of guy. I just never had self confidence and always felt “secondary” to everyone else. Selfless in a way, like I just existed to complement other people and listen to them and make them feel good.

And I still battle this today, but to a much lesser degree. I’m still not entirely comfortable approaching people and striking up conversations, I always feel this reluctance to open up to people and make new friends. And don’t get me wrong, I like socializing but I’m just kind of insecure about who I am, my accomplishments, my social skills etc .

In my head, their this version of me that’s maxed out all his stats. Ripped to the gills, impeccable style, making over 6 figures a year as a freelance copywriter, driving a mustang gt, smooth asf with chicks and well known and connected.

So every time I open up about who I am and what I’m doing for work n stuff, theirs this alarm that goes off in my head. It reminds me that I’m not where I want to be and it makes me insecure and want to go home, to just work on myself. But… I need to socialize, it’s “muscle” I need to train so to speak.

So it’s a strange love hate type of thing. But I do think as I socialize more and keep working towards building my ideal self; that this insecurity of mine will disappear.

4 Likes
#25

So back on topic, I must’ve talked to like 4-5 girls that night. Like individually… and for me that’s unheard of.

Me? Getting to know people on a 1 on 1 basis? What happened to shy Mat???

I’m genuinely pleased and confused at the same time. Hell, I even initiated a conversation with a pretty girl at the bar. Like wtf… that’s so unlike the old me. I never initiate convos with new people, let alone pretty girls.

And you know what’s amazing? I went into all these interactions with ZERO expectations. I wasn’t trying to seduce, I wasn’t trying to get them to like me. I was just being myself and I took nothing personally.

The old me would’ve been upset that none of these girls asked for my IG or something like that, now I’m just like “maybe she has a boyfriend, maybe she’s talking to someone, maybe she’s in a mood, or having other issues.

I don’t take anything personally anymore haha it’s so freeing I love it.

5 Likes
#26

So at the end of the night, everyone’s getting ready to leave. I go use the washroom… and everyone’s already left.

So I walk out, check Uber and cheapest Uber is $89 fucking dollars!!! WTF THAT IS UNHEARD OF.

So I’m a bit tipsy and pissed off at the same time, so I’m walking up the road, eyes glued to my phone… and some girl cat calls me :rofl:

“Hey cutie, where have you been all night?”

I swear I just said “excuse you?” And laughed. She caught me at the worst time, I was so mad at Uber and I just casually get cat called lmao.

Worst part is she was actually HOT. I almost wanted to turn around and get her socials but I was so pre occupied with the Uber thing.

Anyways, 5 mins later I found a Uber for 48$ which is still stupid but good enough.

3 Likes
#27

Totally understand you. Like in this video where the guys are catcalled.

1 Like
#28

Lmao this video is a bit exaggerated, but yeah it felt a bit like that haha

1 Like
#29

I’m going through some of the strangest recon I’ve ever encountered. I’m not quite sure how to explain it. I feel completely lost, yet somehow I feel like I’m on the right track?

Idk, everything feels different now. I don’t feel like the same person, yet I do? It’s like I’ve jumped into an alternate reality suddenly.

  • I no longer have the same negative thoughts I used to have
  • Anytime I start to feel socially anxious, I now consciously think “Who tf cares? I don’t let random strangers decide how I think and act”
  • My personal hygiene has been taken to the max and I’m extremely content with my looks
  • Girls at my gym are becoming really obvious with their long stares, standing really close to me etc.
  • One girl in particular has become extremely obvious about her attraction to me, to the point where she’s tempting me to make a move (but more on that later)
  • I’m considering getting on dating apps. It’s been years since I actively pursued sexual and romantic relationships. I think it’s time to come out of my shell.

On the other hand…

  • I’m becoming anhedonic (extremely demotivated and just bored) especially with everything work related. I’ve stopped caring about copywriting, I don’t care to socialize with anyone at work.

  • I don’t know what to do about my social life, my best friend has been acting in ways that make me question the values of our friendship. His girlfriend is clearly the centre of his world and I’m no longer a priority.

  • People’s opinions are starting to annoy tf out of me. Idk why, but I’m just tired of hearing everyone’s stupid opinions on everything all the time. Maybe it has more to do with me than them, idk. But it really annoys me when they’re opinions are projected on to me, like when they have an expectation that I adhere to there world views… Like eww, F off, I’m my own person, I make the rules and I’ll do what I want.

5 Likes
#30

Remind me please what is your current stack.

#31

I can’t remember who exactly said it in the beginning of ZP, I think it was Luther24. Something about in 1 or 2 years down the line with ZP, people are going to drastically have changed for the better and have massive perceptual shifts in their life, and this because how ZP is working through you and making changes that are coming from your core.

I’m seeing that change in you now. That snap of the fingers where you are beginning to see through a lot of things, and having the realization that what matters to you needs to come through the filter of your own morals and values, and not others.

4 Likes
#32

Khan st3 , LBFH, CFW

2 Likes
#33

I have also CFW but in my custom and I am also experiencing some not-very positive recon. In my case, it is a headache and my usual anti headache medication even does not work.

1 Like