Viktor’s Victory Venture (LE + DRR)

Journals - Major Programs
#1405

This was my plan.
I chose Paragon to help with health & longevity.
But now that AEON is out, it has anti-aging scripting among other things.

Should I change the plan and use KB > Alchemist > AEON?
Using 3 multistagers + one of the most dense artisanal titles sounds like a bad idea though.
I’ll consider this one after I’m done with DRR. It will probably be a few years down the line.
AEON is supposed to mix well with HLB though, so i’ll not worry about combining both later.

Well, for now, that’s the plan for the far future.

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#1406

I haven’t used AC for almost a month.
Honestly, I can’t tell the difference.
Maybe it has seeped deeply into me that everything in it has become second nature? I did use it for 2+ years total after all.

There’s no dip in the manifestations either.

I’ll continue the break from AC to see what will change

#1407

I finally understood it.
The most impactful change i’ve had from 2 years of using SC.

When I look back at it, it’s pretty clear:

Selflessness.

This might be the biggest realization i’ve had so far, second only to when i learned how to just observe.

The more the sub draws me to be more selfless, the more it seems to bring the most improvement.

It’s clear now that i looked back at my favorite subs that are not “boosters”, LBFH & HeO. Both are about selflessness. They are also subs that i can stick to the easiest.

The more i become selfless, the easier i can pursue my selfish goals. As contradictory as it is, it seems like 1 theme that holds true even throughout all this time.

This explains a lot.

I think it is balancing my selfishness.
All i did was for myself, but the subs showed me the value of selflessness, which in turn gives me more capacity to pursue even more selfish goals.

Selfishness through selflessness.

Either through healthy attachment that LBFH showed me, or the adherence to the virtues & mastery from HeO.

I believe this is what i actually need to learn from subs, not necessarily the love & virtue, but the selflessness behind them.

This is why i seemed to lose grasp of HeO’s effects when i took a break from it.
This is why i felt like i’m done with LBFH’s goals after a year of using it.

I failed to comprehend the essence behind what drives me to adhere to the virtues, but i managed to subconsciously understood it with LBFH.

It is what i need and what i unknowingly crave for all this time.

Isn’t the manifestation too strong?
What led me to this realization was just as absurd.
But it took me more than 2 years to come to this, so maybe this one is a late bloomer instead, lol.

Now that I read this again, isn’t this what I’ve been saying for the past 2 years?
Yet I wasn’t aware of it.

It’s the depth of the knowledge, sometimes i can’t put it into words.
Or more like, words can’t really convey what it is.

Well, isn’t that also what I said about the fulfilment from the virtues?
It’s something that I can’t put into words, and even if I could, I wouldn’t be able to convey the understanding behind it.

#1408

It’s not about mastering everything.
It’s about mastering the essence of everything.

Presumptuous much, but i think there’s something to this.

Actually, I’ve been pretty scared to branch out.
I lack time to go deep even into those i’m currently focusing on.

But what if i cut out the extraneous stuff, focus on the important parts, and find ways to grow them in a way that will allow me to pursue other things.

In other words, it’s a gamble on ROI.
More than what i was willing to do/was aware of its possibility.

This seems pretty basic, but the simple & basic stuff are always the hardest to get right.

#1409

I don’t have the appetite to listen to subs.

Not that I don’t want to, but I feel like more is not necessary.
Everything works just as usual anyway, I got great outcomes in fact.

Strange, this is the only time I’ve ever gotten the intuition to add a rest days in between listening days.
Well, it’s working out well so far. It’s just as strong as usual, so there’s no need to revert to once every other day yet.

Listening to this little to the sub while still reaping the full benefits, it just shows how strong SC’s subs are. Well, I did listen to HeO for more than a year, so that’s to be expected, i guess.

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#1410

I went and did it.

I thought I was just taking an extra rest day, turned out i’m on the 4th day now…
Well that’s essentially just another washout.

I don’t mind this pace though. Even if it ends up being weaker, so what.
I’m already satisfied with what I got from HeO & DRR right now.

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#1411

I’ve been using 2-4 rest days in between listening days this cycle. Both because my intuition told me to and i forgot to listen, lol.

The results are similar to usual.
If anything, i find it more pleasant to use.

#1412

I’m becoming more aware that i’m sensitive to injustice.
I tend to overreact when I receive one and I tend to be moved easily when I see one.
It’s as if my survival depends on it. Weird, but i’ve just become more aware of this.

Among many things, this explains why LBFH worked so well for me.
It was helping me directly & indirectly with this.
Being able to shift my perspectives from survival to kindness & understanding helps me tremendously.

I didn’t think this was that bad of a condition, the are benefits too despite of the disadvantages, so I just left it alone. But now i realize what to do.

For starter, I need to gain more control of it instead of trying to “fix” it out of my being. Understanding more about myself & others will be crucial for this.

Is this what DRR2 is leading me towards? Is it because i stack it with HeO? I’m glad i ran LBFH first though.

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#1413

HeO 15m DRR2 45s

I don’t get recon from DRR2 with this short playtime anymore, but there’s no reason to rush either.
I’ll continue using +5s every listening day. No need to repeat my mistake of jumping ahead too quickly.

#1414

This stack is working well.

HeO + DRR.

Too well that I’m starting to lose interest in adding more & making customs.

It’s condensed enough to hit everything i want while still leaving 1 slot to use as a free space for emergency/extra desires.

Well, let’s see how it holds up after HLB is released, lol.

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#1415

I forgot to stop DRR2…
This is gonna bite me in the ass.

Well, here goes nothing.

Update 1:

I got no recon the whole day. Not even a slight one.
Have i finally beaten the recon from DRR2 after more than half a year?

Well, I can’t confirm it yet. I need to observe more.

If it is truly done, i’m gonna go to stage 3 next month.

Update 2:

It’s a full day after I listened to 15m, no recon.
I guess it’s really over this time.

I’ll use a microloop tomorrow then 15m again.

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#1416

I haven’t touched AC in 2 months. Nothing different.
I guess I’ll just drop it entirely. More doesn’t always mean better anyway.

#1417

Still no recon at all from DRR2.
Am I finally done with stage 2?

If i look at the new insights & perspectives i’ve acquired. I think it is actually done.
Now that it’s clear, i can roughly guess what caused the recon. The recon was washed away as it was solved.

I didn’t get any recon with DRR1, and i always mention it as a holistic sub.
Now that it has worked with DRR2, i can understand how useful the broad approach is for healing.

Update 1:

Here it comes.
Finally, after 2 days I could trace a bit of recon from DRR2.
But it’s significantly smaller than the usual.
It’s progressing well, but I won’t risk it. back to microloops.