This is my first custom and my first journal, don’t know how to structure a journal properly, so I just spill all my thoughts into a paragraph.
Listening Time : 5 min
Listening Pattern : Alternate Days First 21 days the take 3 days off, repeat
First Update after one listen:
The day I listened was pretty normal, just noticed a few stares from however on my break day I noticed that I’m a little more wittier.
Particularly, this new girl at work who jokes around alot asked me, this, "do you like my clothing? " Outright I said (jokingly) "I don’t know, I don’t care", she was flabbergasted . I feel like this is from Stark, but I need more experienced users with Stark like @Invictus to confirm this.
I feel calmer and nonchalant, literally stress-free. Even when my sister was arguing with me, I didn’t even emotionally react or shout at her. I just calmly handled the situation
I feel more aware and concerned about my appearance and face. Like I literally researched online on the female gaze and what women want and compared myself with “their” beauty standards. Tho I still feel attractive. Is this normal with Wanted @Invictus?
I got too horny to the point where I did PMO. Not proud of what I did, but I don’t feel sad or depressed. Usually when something like this happens, post-n*t clarity kicks in, however, today it didn’t happen. However, I don’t want to continue this habit, as I have identified that it really hinders my potential. Read @Luther24 post about PMO, and gave me enough motivation to end this habit for good.
If it’s too hard to stop PMO completely, right away…
Just drop the Porn and solely use your hand, like your great grandfathers did. Lol
Internet Porn is extremely addictive and designed to screw men over. All of the psychological damage has to do with how it subconsciously programs, influences you and tricks your brain.
Realistically, no man who is on top of their shit should have time to be watching porn. Keep yourself busy, ambitious and motivated in life. Stay active, focus on your goals and keep building yourself. Create relationships and socialize, get fulfilling dopamine from everywhere in real life like how nature intended. Not only will you enjoy life more but you’ll be mentally, physically and emotionally healthier
Because you’re amusing yourself, you have Stark in there, which has a unique property when combined with WANTED, and that unique property makes you feel like amusing yourself.
I’ll give you an example from my own experience this week:
Since my girl doesn’t mind me booking up with chicks anymore, the door is now open for me, yet all I’ve been doing is leading a girl on for my own amusement, and already ditched her twice in the last 2 days, why? Because it’s a unique expression of “status”.
Do you think masturbation without porn is ok regarding subs? I am asking because on some subs specifically on Emperor after some time I had a problem that I have been thinking about sex too much and after some time it was almost unbearable.
I do not want to imagine how it could be on Khan, Diamond, SMX, or maybe PS, Primal.
I will play devils advocate here and tell you this;
Don’t beat yourself up about PMO’ing. I repeat: dont beat yourself up about it.
I myself did semen retention/no fap for a few years with my longest streak for about 8 months. Do you know what I learned? All of that stuff was in my head. Speaking purely anecdotally, and contrary to everything you read online I got laid more when I was PMO’ing. I’m more chill, down to earth and my horniness is HIGH without being that extreme no fap horniness which honestly just made it impossible to focus on anything. Last year throughout my first year on WANTED I was fapping to porn regularly and still got laid more then I had the previous years with less effort. Way less effort. Even now I fap to porn in addition to having sex and I’m STILL constantly horny (probably due to my extremely sexual stack but still…)
In my opinion the guilt and shame we induce in ourselves in response to PMO’ing does far more harm then any actual damage done to our physiology. That being said, if you still want to quit by all means do so but I just want to challenge the idea that as long as you are PMO’ing you are somehow failing.
Porn just screws up your brain lol. The entire process of clicking a video and your brain lighting up is not normal, it’s artificial. You have infinite novelty at the click of a finger. You’re training your brain and you’re programming your subconscious in a way that is unnatural + not aligned with millions of years of evolution.
If I decided to watch porn, I could continue to get laid like a mad man but I don’t. It’s disgusting to me, lol
Porn sex = not real
Pornstars = gross
Masturbating to porn = cheap, it’s like eating fast food and I have a far higher standard for myself and way of living.
That’s all tied to your self-worth… that’s what allows you to attract the higher quality women.
Most of all, I’m not interested in seeing other naked men and their private parts.
That’s f***ing weird to me lol
I’m not interested in watching other men have sex while I’m sitting there as a spectator - also f***ing weird to me.
Watching porn is like fooling yourself to get off. I don’t need to fool myself through a whole bunch of trickery and hijacking of my brain/perception to enjoy my sex life.
Masturbating without porn was one of the healthiest, most productive things I’ve ever done in my life. It takes a few months to really learn how to do properly, but it’s the beginning of learning how to have sexual control. Masturbating without porn and really learning what it feels like to do so could be considered taking action on any sexuality-enhancing subliminal like Diamond or SMX
I did PMO again, and I am not happy with myself, I have pernamentely decided to stop it and to find a real girl.
I think I am getting hit by recon, suddenly I am feeling insecure about my looks when I see other my age group or younger… all of a sudden I feel inferior when I see someone taller I just compare myself with themselves and feel bad…idk how to explain but I feel like all my insecurities are being broadcasted right now.
did get some looks at the gym tho, the only positive noted for today
I’m still procrastinating alot but I deciding to also to completely stop it along with PMO