Serafim’s 2025 Journal

Weekly cash flow for week ending mar 13.
TFSA $213.79
Margin -$2449.61.

Closed out 4 credit spread positions worth 4500 for a total loss of -2598.61. Purchased call debit spreads on SPY and QQQ June 20 contracts to hopefully offset the losses. The 2 positions were up roughly 400 by end of day.

Last week sold off hard, more than I expected. Wish I wasn’t so aggressive in purchasing stock last month. Would have got a better deal this month. Margin acct down roughly 12% YTD. Now I wait for prices to recover.

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Weekly investing cash flow for week ending mar 21.
Margin: $69.57
TFSA: $22.39.
Total 91.96.

A rather slow week. Still on vacay. Market still forming a bottom. Next week I see a good chance of being flat also. Big tariff announcement April 2 so the following week may be either a turning point or the next leg down. I’m 50/50 at this point. I’m well positioned to sell covered calls at the next rebound.

In hindsight I should have held Alibaba shares longer. Avg price was 96 on 100. Sold a $100 call when it was 91 and it rocketed upwards way past that by expiration getting called away at 100. Now hovering around 140. It was an unexpected move, was thinking it would hover in the 90’s range with tariffs and all but it seems capital got reallocated from US to China/European markets.

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Back to work today after 21 days off, 14 in Mexico.
KB4-S:EnTr and EOG st1 5 min each. WB 7 min.

Last cycle started out with LOS, switched out to WB mid cycle to add sexual performance for vacay and it has more to offer than LOS. Don’t care for the harem scripting but do like the physical shifting and the confidence/non chala ce and overall body/self image I get from it plus a small bit of wealth scripting in it. If new Wanted contains physical shifting in it I will Most likely swap out WB for Wanted OG when it drops.

Put on 10 pounds due to eating excess food/desert. Yesterday did low bar squats of 345x6, haven’t moved that weight/reps in 7 years. Weight before trip was 201, 211 this morning. Normally I fluctuate 5 pounds from days off to work days. Target weight by the end of the work set is 205.

March looks to be a slow month and negative overall for cash flow. Figured another cycle of EOG ST1 will work while I wait out the downturn then will switch to ST2 next cycle.

Still haven’t heard anything from that job I interviewed for yet, starting to think I didn’t get it as I’m sure I would have heard by now to take the next step based on experience.

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Weekly investing cash flow for week ending March 28.
Margin and total: $197.87.

Market had a huge rally Monday then proceeded to cough up all its gains finishing the week slightly negative. Bottom still forming, perhaps 2-4 more weeks.

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One side effect of the name embedded KB4/Synergy: Energetic Transcendence is less tolerance for extreme heat. Was fine in Mexico but my sauna time 20 minutes is the absolute max, previously was able to last 30 min.

I turn down the heat to 17C at night and the past few days I’ve left the heat there all day and been fine.

The reason I chose KB4 instead of ST3 is I feel ST4 has a bit more zip to it. It’s also the sub I’ve run the most. Some people run ST3 wondering if they should have stayed on ST1 or 2 a few more cycles. ST4 has that covered containing the other 3 stages.

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Weekly investing cash flow for week ending Apr 4.
Margin: $100.57
TFSA dividends: $90.10.

The last 2 days have been a massive sell off. One of the worst 2 day sell offs I’ve seen. Have to go back to 2020 to March or exceed. My portfolios are in rough shape. I got caught off guard by purchasing too much high risk high volatility stuff.

Sold off ENB:TO for a 37% gain over the last few years. It was only 3% off 52 week highs, held up very well through the past 6 weeks of the downturn. Sold it to buy back in to other beat down stocks. Will tip toe into small positions next week.

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Have swapped WB for Primal the past few listening days. Halfway through current cycle. Primal is the smoothest alpha title for me. I like the fun and the pure authenticity that it adds.

Might find a way to add HOM for the rest of this cycle to give me back that edge for investing that I seemed to have lost as of late. EOG ST1 has been hard on my portfolio haha. JK the subs I run don’t have the power to bring down the whole market. The timing of it is perfect as I derive too much of my self worth from my investing. I’ve asked myself today what would happen if my portfolio went to zero could I handle that?

The answer of course is yes but I wouldn’t like it. I still got my job and it pays well. It’s been 4 weeks since I had the interview and haven’t heard back anything so at this point I’m 70-30 that I didn’t get it. Still have mixed feelings about it since I think it would age me faster but the plan is to take it if offered and go hard for 5 years. Right now we are not doing night shifts. Have only done 1 set of nights this year. The other job does nights every second set and when we do nights currently it’s every third set.

If I don’t get the job the other option is to transfer to our branch that is at that same site. There is market turmoil and political uncertainty at this time as we have a federal election Apr 28 with huge consequences for my region. If I don’t get the position my plan is to wait till after that and see how it all plays out before requesting a transfer. Also once nights are reinstated at my current position it will make the other branch that much more attractive.

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Wednesday night I did a Firewalk ceremony, never done one before. We built a roaring fire then did an initiation ceremony. It was all men so a cultivation of warrior energy.

Thought I would have to sprint across the coals but just casually walked, even paused towards the end of the 10 foot track of fresh coals. Did 3 walks in total.

Got to bed late and was sleep deprived yesterday but felt hot most of the day.

Previously I mentioned being less tolerant for extreme heat like the sauna max time of 20 instead of 30 min. The last few times I’ve made it to 30 minutes again.

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Weekly investing cash flow for week ending April 11.
Margin: $96.94 USD
TFSA: Dividends $14.63 CAD

TFSA purchases: 200 x SOXL @8.69. 30 x QLD @69.26. Used roughly half the proceeds from the sale of ENB last week.

Looks like market may have found a bottom on Monday with SPY hitting around 480. Will most likely have a negative cash flow week next week as I have a credit spread that got in trouble and expires next week.

Found a new money podcast that has guests with differing opinions on the tariff situation. I like to take in a variety of different views to come up with my own analysis. This is the pod here

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Purchased DD:TS tonight. Will run it along with KB4 name embed and EOG ST1 the next 3 listening days which will wrap up the cycle. Will move on to EOG ST2 next week.

Have a once per year sit down meeting with the big bosses on Monday and from reading the copy I figure DD:TS would be perfect for that situation. My social skills could definitely use a lift. The new IC looks awesome as well. Figure I’ll give my social skills a boost for 2-3 cycles of DD:TS then switch to IC. A custom with DD, DD:TS, and IC would be badass.

Next cycle I May test out swapping KB4 name embed for KHAN ST4. I prefer to have one title in my stack that is a sexual energy powerhouse. Ran a micro loop the other day that gave quite the boost. Got wind of some layoffs on my last day off which brought up some fears around financial security. Khan ST4 quelled that fear in short order. Soon after I was comfortable with the idea of getting laid off for the adventure of the unknown that would have been thrust upon me.

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Haven’t read the copy for Emperor: Art of War yet I’m getting Chuck Rhoades vibes from it. He was the district attorney from Billions.

He was a master strategist. My favourite episode was the day of the Ice Juice IPO, second last episode of season 2. It was a take no prisoners, no holds barred, whatever it takes strategy that involved the sacrifice of not only his own fortune but also that of his father and BFF in order to take down his man.

His downfall was his sexual fetish of being dominated which led to his wife Wendy leaving him. They were the ultimate power couple. Therefore the ultimate Chuck Rhoads stack would be AoW and KB ST1 for 3-6 cycles then working up to KHAN eventually so that he could dominate his Wendy for a change.

Now for my controversial Billions take. Mike Prince was more Alpha than Bobby Axelrod there I said it. He was about to become president but it took the whole gang, enemies with one another, to put aside their differences and become a united front in order to bring down Mike Prince.

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Today I had a group meeting with 2 big bosses and 5 other co workers. I said everything I wanted to say, was very articulate and ensured everything I said was of value. I asked intelligent questions regarding the business key metrics. I believe it was well received as others chimed in to reinforce the points I made. I was well aware of the lack of value that a couple of the other guys gave as they spoke and rambled on.

I socialized with a few people that I normally don’t with at work today. I’ve come to the realization that I need to expand my social circle as a lot of the convo at work with my work buds revolves around subtly bad mouthing the company and certain leaders at work. Been having deep conversations with the guy in mentoring this week. I crave more meaningful conversations then company trash talk now. I sensed my mentee was off today and made sure to keep a close eye at critical times.

At toastmasters tonight I won the best table topics speaker award which is a 1-2 min improv talk. Was told it would make a good speech. It was a quick summary of my Firewalk experience last week. Unfortunately I also won the goblet award given to the speaker that used the most filler words. I start a lot of sentences with ‘and’. Said and 11 times tonight so there’s still more work to do with this sub.

First impressions is that DD:TS is very effective for work/business related conversation. I’ve been socially awkward most of my life, have improved significantly since starting subclub but it’s still somewhat of a weak point that has been holding me back and so far this sub seems very promising.

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Any recon? Or recon that dissolved?

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I did have some, from switching to a new sub. What I’ve noticed regarding the anti-recon is that I seem to come across the answer to whatever I inquire about by the next day. Twice now I’ve already had the answer, once from a podcast that’s been in my library for months and the second one from the book The Gene Keys by Richard Rudd that I’ve read in it’s entirety a few years ago that I am revisiting.

Had a healing dream regarding my 2 dogs that have since passed. Was grieving in my dream.

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The book Gene Keys book describes 64 fractals. Each one contains 3 elements.

  1. Shadow
  2. Gift
  3. Siddhi

You enter your birth date info and it creates a chart showing your 4 primary gene keys. Sounds like astrology but it’s not. My 4 are 4, 23, 43, and 49. Read through 43 and working my way through 23. Made notes on my highlighted sections of the shadow of GK 23 which is Complexity. A lot of it has to do with faulty communication. Seems like the ideal sub for this is none other than DD:TS. Discovered this 2 days after purchasing the sub.

I’ve been extremely critical of someone at work that has these shadow characteristics, which means this same shadow must be within me. Classic projection.

GK 23 shadow notes

Summary

At an individual level this shadow creates misunderstanding and division in 2 different ways—through individual saying the wrong things, and saying them at the wrong time. Some of the bloodiest wars on our planet have begun because of a few simple misconstrued words right understanding which leads to write speech has hit upon this great and simple truth— that language flows directly out of your state of consciousness the more profoundly you understand, and embrace the shadow, the free of it you become

The challenge within the 23rd shadow is found in its programming partner — the 43rd shadow of deafness. The 23rd shadow represents an overwhelming human urge to express yourself, coupled with the inability to hear either yourself or others. This creates a lethal cocktail.

Whenever this 23rd shadow speaks, it complicates the situation which intern catalyzes an exponential process of understanding that can soon escalate from a mental process to an emotional one. The fear beneath this 23rd shadow is of meeting intolerance and being excluded by others. Ironically This very fear drives the behaviour that manifest the fear.

Even though your brain may hear the language inside your head translating that to the vocal cords is another matter how successful this process is depends upon your overall frequency if you were caught in the victim patterns of the shadow, then the process of translation slightly misfires as a code has been copied incorrectly. This leads to a pattern that is not harmonized to the situation or listener.

When someone speaks or writes from their heart, you’ll understand the gist of what they’re saying, regardless of how they say it conversely when you read or hear something that leaves you feeling cold you’re probably hearing someone’s deep-seated fear people driven by the 23rd shadow speak in order to gain approval or recognition — and always without exception set them up to be misunderstood.

If you were choked by fear, you cannot speak clearly, if at all, and so these people slowly learn not to see what they really think, instead of lapsing into silence or superficiality. This is particularly true of children who have very oppressive parents.

The other side of the shadow is the expressive nature, which often cannot stop talking, however, because there is a general mistiming within their neurology, they create enormous interference, and fragmentation wherever they go these are people who always say the wrong thing or they say the right thing but the wrong time the language pattern of such people tends to overcomplicate and miss the essential meaning of things in enormous amount of energy trying to be to find that they are constantly pushed away. These people tend to talk in circles, explaining an unconscious attempt to conceal the anger that lies within them at not being understood on a much deeper level.

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Gene Key 23 Gift: Simplicity

Summary

The 23rd gift abhors clutter and jargon. It communicates precisely, clearly and with great economy.

The 23rd gift is an ongoing process in which more and more clutter is gradually removed from your inner and outer life as your mind clears spaciousness opens inside you, allowing you to see things with great clarity.

A good metaphor for simplicity is flying an airplane through and then above the clouds in the clouds the mind finds only complexity and it goes around in circles, trying to find the way out. In these lower frequency, clouds you pick up static all the time. At the higher levels of frequency, your mind sees more clearly. Beyond the clouds, the world is left below and begin to move into more silence

A final aspect to mention about this 23rd gift is its incredible sense of humour. The way in which this gift operates can give rise to hilarious, spontaneous expressions that in someway capture the essence of a person or a particular moment these people are on the ball. Because they do not plan what they are going to say, they often take everyone by surprise. At lower frequencies, this trait can cause hertz and rejection. At a higher frequency however, it usually causes laughter or awe. It is all a matter of frequency.

Above all, operating out of the 23rd gift are wonderfully clear, communicators and advisors. Their true genius lies in the economy of their language and the originality of their expression. There is noblest truth of all—the gift of simplicity.

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Gene Key 23 Siddhi: Quintessence

According the the Hawkins map of consciousness a Siddhi calibrates quite high. 580-590 IIRC. According to Gene Keys this state can’t be forced, more of an unfolding.

Rather then aiming to attain the Siddhi’s I think it’s more practical for me to move from the shadow to the Gift.

Summary

The 23rd Siddhi has an alchemical flavour to it. At a metaphoric level, this refers to the ability to extract gold from base metal— the goal of all alchemy. Therefore people of this Siddhi are able to touch the gold hidden within other human beings. They can transmit the power of the awaken state through a word or a book or a gesture. This is the Midas touch. Every person has a unique key that opens them to Hayer states of consciousness, and the people of this Siddhi hold all the keys. They do not necessarily know that they hold the keys— they simply respond spontaneously to each person, and then so doing, they touch the core of that person

The physical body itself contains the seed of the siddhic consciousness. It is concealed in your DNA and controlled by a hidden timing mechanism that is utterly spontaneous and out of your individual reach. There is no way for you to trigger this event because it lies beyond the reach of your mind, and anything you try to do to encourage the event actually gets in the way of your natural process

Once the 23rd Siddhi has fully dawned inside a person, they become an alchemical agent. Like Quicksilver, they bind themselves to people and their way into the cracks within their mental structure. Such a person will undergo a series of spontaneous simplifications as a continued presence of their aura slowly begins to extract the quintessence from the dross placed with you by your culture and conditioning. As a recipient to this vibration, you will inevitably go through a complete deconstruction, which may be very difficult for you. Like all such alchemical processes, it can be extremely dangerous to your mental health unless you complete the entire process.

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Last day of cycle.
KB4 name embed/EOG ST1 5 min each.
DD:TS 7:30.

Today was the most dialed in I’ve been in a long time. First couple loops of DD:TS had recon in the form of brain fog, that’s cleared up now.

Closed a loosing trade and remained unaffected, relieved that I didn’t have to watch the market anymore. Will have to re think my credit spread strategy as this was a sizeable loss, just under $1500 USD. When they go bad like this one it’s on the wrong side of an asymmetric risk/reward.

In spite of that I was in very good spirits today. Almost like I’ve lost attachment to my trading results at this time. It’s time to move on from EOG ST1 to ST2 next cycle. I believe ST4 has asymmetric risk reward scripting in it and some advanced finance concepts therefore I should spend some time on ST2,3 prior. Will have to re read the copy soon.

Loving DD:TS, I think it helped reconcile what EOG ST1 was working on.

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Weekly cash flow for week ending April 17.

Margin: -1314.64 USD
TFSA: $32.38 CAD dividends.

April is shaping up to be a negative month.

Day 1 of washout.

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Weekly cash flow for week ending Apr 25.
Margin: $388.65. Market starting to pick up.

Found out today I didn’t get the job I interviewed for a couple months back. Now the question is do I want to transfer to that same branch with my current company?

Still torn on that. One reason is they have suspended night shift for the foreseeable future. I’m thinking at least 6 months. The other position would be more cash for sure but with a toll on my health. I’d probably love it at first but it may soon feel like prison after a year or so.

Calculated my housing costs mortgage, property tax, insurance to be 36% of my take home pay. Having trouble getting ahead. Still able to afford a couple vacations a year. Would have liked to have more cash to top up investing accounts during the latest dip. Halfway through paying off the investing course. That’s $500 USD/month that I could be topping up investments with.

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