Alright, well I’ve had a draft journal for so long that my progress has exceeded my initial results so I scrapped the entire thing. I had said in previous comments I’d made that I would get around to this eventually but I guess getting something started is better than a draft that will likely sit forever.
Mostly right now I want to talk about my experience with Seductress. I’ve had results from the other titles in my stack but Seductress is the one I have ran most consistently. I actually just got over a long break from subs. It wasn’t really a conscious decision I made, which makes me wonder if perhaps it was my subconscious to take it easy for a while.
My progress on all levels have skyrocketed. When I started running Seductress I had realized that I was falling for a friend of mine, and unbeknownst to me, he had similar feelings. I was really low in my depression at the time. I just figured he’s a catch and there’s no way I could see myself being the person he would want. I just braced myself for the day when he would find a girlfriend and eventually drift apart, and was attempting to make peace with that until he started coming around more consistently. I still thought of him as a friend because it felt damaging for me to start thinking of him romantically, but then I finally realized that I was already feeling that way toward him thanks to him being really slick about it. It hit me really hard for some reason, and I realized that I want to be as good to him as he has been to me, and while we both hadn’t been direct with each other yet, my plan was to just enjoy our time together now that I noticed all his small efforts of caring about me, and reciprocate them. I still feared that perhaps I was just looking for something to make me feel better so I might have been making it into something it wasn’t, but at the same time, I was falling for him and so I started running Seductress to see what would happen.
I thought that it would help me live up to my potential more as a partner, because the more I thought of him, the more I wanted to be the kind of woman that would light him up as he did for me when I was honestly in one of the worst places in my life.
It has been about 5 months. Since then I put everything on the line. I moved, I lost 30 lbs and been preparing to start an online business. I feel way better than I did before. New opportunities are around all the time since I am in the city now. A lot of my friendships have strengthened, and my thought patterns have changed drastically.
I see a way hotter person when I look in the mirror. I even had two men in the last couple months just say to me “excuse me but you are really beautiful.”
Now back to my guy… I worked up the courage to tell him how I felt, and I wasn’t wrong at all, he is in fact crazy about me so we are together now. Now we can finally say all the things we wished we could say to each other and that feels amazing. He even said I restored his outlook on life, and honestly I am so thankful for him as he’s done more than that for me. It’s crazy how personal beliefs can help change everything because for the most part all I did was act on things that were possible but I simply didn’t believe in myself, and now I am seeing what happens when I do.