Currently running a loop of Total Breakdown. I will probably run Regeneration Q and Elixir either later today or tomorrow. I want to run one more loop each today of Limit Destroyer Ultima and Total Breakdown.
Iām not sure if itās from adding in Limit Destroyer Ultima and Total Breakdown but I just realized that yeah I want to be more mentally and emotionally mature and healthy but I also want to be more responsible. Seems like a weird thing to say at times but for a long time I would have conversations with people about personal responsibility not realizing at the time how my staggering lack of mental and emotional maturity was keeping from becoming more responsible myself and that lack of responsibility and accountability played a huge if not entire role in me making some very avoidable decisions and mistakes that I now understand on a deep level put my Wife and myself in our current situation. Awareness is important. I fucked up hardcore and thereās no other way around it.
Running Total Breakdown again before I make dinner. Iām going to run Limit Destroyer Ultima at least once more today as well.
Wouldnāt it be too dense?
I think the most important thing Iāve learnt about using subs is being in a rush is counterproductive. Sorry if Iām mistaken but Iāve got that impression reading @Jamesās posts.
@Sub.Zero - I agree. But experimenting is part of the process too. If itās working for @James, he will continue it. Else he will adjust his stack accordingly.
Thatās right maybe itās only me but his method of experimenting seems to me to be pretty chaotic. @James no offense meant itās only me being honest. Sorry.
I am experiencing serious brain fog so Iām going to take the rest of the night off and go back to just running Elixir and Regeneration for now. I guess I have to be more patient
Thatās the very impression I got, mate. Take a break, clear out your head and move forward. If I could advice you I would say, keep healing using Regeneration and Elixir for at least one month in total and then decide what to do next. You could keep healing or switch to Khan ST1 and Elixir or LD.
After doing the healing Iām moving to Emperor + Rebirth. I want to keep healing for 5 weeks in total and then move to that combo to build solid foundations. If Iām not mistaken @SaintSovereign used Emperor for building foundations for Khan. EoG, an QL.
I havenāt listened to anything yet this morning. Iāve been reading a little and doing some research on emotionally healthy people and what characteristics they have. I donāt see it around me at all in person so I have to find examples of that elsewhere. Seems so strange to have little to no idea what it really is. I honestly think the first time in a long time that I saw it was sadly when my wife was hospitalized. The nurses she had right after her bypass surgery were some of the most mature people I feel I have ever seen or met. They sort of unintentionally obviously ruined any other visit my wife had because I couldnāt help but look for the qualities those nurses had in any future care being given to my wife. I think the entire situation itself as well as well as feeling that I could have handled certain things better was a catalyst for change.
Running Regeneration while trying to ignore the shit music my landlord insists on playing at unnecessary volumes. Trying to get through a novel I have been putting off reading because itās the second to last in the series and I donāt want the series to end. Although itās what folks would probably classify as "urban fantasy " whatever the fuck that means I identify with the main character.
I have run one loop today each of Regeneration and Elixir. Not sure what Iām going to do the rest of the day as regards to listening to subs. After the horrendous brain fog I felt yesterday I am trying to be a bit minimalist with what I run for the time being. I will most likely take more time or days off as well. I was thinking that maybe no more than two loops a day of Regeneration and Elixir for now and then take a day or two off every five days. Instead of being chaotic about things as was pointed out I want to try and go with a " less is more " mindset. I realized this morning that given the random nature of my job I actually miss having a set schedule so to speak.
Ran a second loop of Regeneration and I am halfway through a second loop of Elixir. I was sort of hoping I might feel a bit better today emotionally but I donāt. Not at the moment anyway. I just wish I knew what the hell I was doing half the time instead of feeling like I have no fucking clue.
What book series? Urban fantasy is usually what they describe as supernatural stuff i think. Two of my favorite urban fantasy series are The Iron Druid Chronicles and Quincy Harker Demon Hunter.
I havenāt read the Iron Druid Chronicles but my Wife has. What I am reading is part of the Sandman Slim series by Richard Kadrey. The main character is a cross between Hank Moody , John Wick , and Harry Dresden. I havenāt read the Dresden Files but I know a little about the series from my Wife telling me about it.
I didnāt think I would like Californication much not really knowing the premise but on a lazy afternoon one day back in 2009 I believe I watched the first two seasons in one day. The second season is still by far my favorite
Like I posted previously I am sticking with Regeneration and Elixir for now. At this point the only way that would change is when Ultima customs become an option and I can build one with Attachment Destroyer, Total Nonchalance, and Rogue. Safe to say my dream subliminal
Just the thought of running something like that alongside Elixir and Regeneration is almost wet dream inducing
I wasnāt feeling much earlier so I have decided to run a loop of Elixir using a pair of headphones instead of earbuds.
Itās good to know youāre back on the track. I would try to find my āsweet spotā for the combo Regeneration and Elixir keep doing it for a while and then sack it with the custom you told us about decreasing the combo intensity for the intensity of the new stack.
To add to that suggestion @Sub.Zero and @James , these last couple of days on my custom Iāve been stressed. I included The Forge in my custom, and itās been nothing like Iāve felt before (for extended periods of time) with SC subs.
Yesterday I noticed I had v.1 of Sanguine on my phone, and I looped it for a couple of hours. The difference was clear. Under clearly stressful situations, Sanguine redirects my emotional energy. Since Iāve been a talker when on it, that may be why I had numerous casual conversations with customers yesterday. I felt good about myself. Sanguine was good for me.
Thatās definitely what I think @James needs. Redirecting his emotional energy and something which would make him internally solid and at peace. I think nothing better than Sanguine for that.
Yesterday I ran one loop of The Executive and nothing else for the rest of the day. I wanted to test that " less is more " scenario to see how it works and yeah I was bored and irritable which I took as a good thing and did way more than I planned on doing. Today I am going to run one loop of The Elixir and one loop of Regeneration and let that be it for the day. Give my brain a break and hopefully not be overwhelmed or even close. I sometimes think and I have been guilty of this myself a lot is that if one loop works well then three , four , five , six , or whatever number of loops will work great. I feel like that is where myself and others sabotage our own best efforts. That and making our stacks either too dense or unintentionally overwhelming. The nice thing about this as well is that it will obviously free up time and also hopefully create a better and more consistent listening schedule and experience.