Thank you so much for posting this!
Excellent! The exact clips I was thinking of!
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4/3/25
Struggling to decide on the listening queue this morning. Such is life. It could be far, far worse, I know. This is the journal though! Take my thoughts! Take them all.
I reached out to a former boss of mine yesterday. He had just started some medication for ADHD before our working time together ended, and I was interested in finding out if he had gotten officially diagnosed and how he went about that. I was surprised to see a reply within a couple hours. He told me he had self diagnosed before going to his doctor, but has since stopped the meds as they stifled his ‘creative personality’. He encouraged me to keep an open mind about it. All in all, a thoughtful reply.
I also spoke to a lady staff member on campus yesterday regarding diagnosis. She is the student activities director, and since I have been a ‘celebrity’ judge for a campus competition for the past few years we have gotten acquainted. Lady came by for food at dinner time and I felt compelled to ask her about her degrees. That got the conversation going. She told me about her stuff, getting diagnosed, etc. Her executive dysfunction and getting couch locked. Told me the tests I had taken were valid. She did give me the name of a counselor on campus that could direct me further if I chose. It does have me thinking now on my need for something official.
I will add here that “Instead of bemoaning your fate, strategize around your nature” has been helpful these past few weeks.
I’m looking to reform BDD for my upcoming birthday. NDE is very fun, but I feel I could do without it in a custom I’m angling to support my autistic needs a bit better. I do enjoy the emotional regulation of EmpD immensely, plus them other benefits, so that core’s gunna stay. BDLM core as well; I’ve had several interesting enlargement methods present themselves to me, and one of them has me in a curious temptation. Nearly enough to buy and use for a period of time.
Dropping PRom core and Synergy: Venus Unveiled in exchange for Love Bomb Core. I really feel Love Bomb acts as a cheat code in my life, and I like that.
Still a work in progress, but I want to figure it out soon, as 44 approaches quickly. Universe, send me the module list today!
10 min LB
15 min BDD
7.5 min AuraBoost
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Late night thoughts:
Wife stack result?
This afternoon, my wife listened to her NE Diamond (15 min) and her first listen - 3 min of Emperor: The Executive.
She just spent an hour fucking me silly! Really took the initiative during intercourse, telling me to switch differing positions, starting with a bj. 
Such enthusiasm, as on display tonight, is (was!) quite rare. After I came, she let me know that she was interested in having me cum again for her. She kept that up right until she came later on. PizzaShaman avoids the back to back orgasms now though, a harsh lesson learned. 
Anyways. I feel the experience I had this evening was definitely due to her listening today. Like she was executing the diamond script on my ass. It was wild!
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I just realized the significance of my daughter’s friend calling me PizzaDad !
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ROFLMAO! Happy for both of ya.
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4/8/25
The ongoing listening queue struggle! Thankfully my problems are light and that is the most distressing thing at the moment.
I completed my required tasks on my long weekend off. Daughter’s singing event attended, same with church. DMV yesterday- an older woman sitting next to me on a bench initiated conversation after we observed a dude getting heated over some plate registration issue. I realize that being autistic and having Gate 13 in my HD chart, in addition to having my magnetic presence (lol) has created the endless supply of awkward conversations. /sigh.
I am not exactly sure how to properly support my spectrum ‘gifts’ and ‘gaps’ with subliminal audio. I want to, I know that much.
15 min LB
10 min A:S
5 min BDD custom
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4/15/25
And now Art of War.
FFS
The concept of “mastery” is something I find ensnaring; it draws me in every time. Likely due to the desire to have that perception of myself, a master!
15 min BDD
1.5 min Art of War
5 min LB
Provided future testing proves fruitful, which I expect, I might be best served pairing TWTP with AoW in a 2 core custom. Give myself the flexibility to pair it with either H:O or an EmpD based custom. Time will tell!
44 tomorrow. Hopefully it’s a good day.
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Will be 44 in a few months myself. Happy Birthday in advance, PizzaShaman!
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Late night thoughts:
Today was very interesting. Art of War is some kinda hotness, let me tell you.
Only 90 seconds, but I noticed a difference in my day. The emotional distance part was super present, and (I gotta say) quite enjoyable. I felt like I had time to respond in all my interactions today, not just react. I felt (and still feel) calm and still internally, like my energy is just chillin’. The internal balance scripting is great and I find it very beneficial. How else to put it…I really like Emperor: DADDY for the emotional regulation, something I have lacked throughout most of my life. Art of War takes that to a whole 'notha level, at least based off my experience today.
- Subdue without struggle, resolving disputes through insight and negotiation rather than force.
Just used this on my 15yr old son regarding a…hygiene dispute. The discussion was executed flawlessly on my part, and he saw the wisdom inherent in my presented plan, so no argument or push back.
Recon:
15 mins of BDD usually gives me recon in the form of …it’s like facial sensations, maybe muscle tension in the face is the best term? Tiredness in the face? It wasn’t as bad today, although it was still present.
5 mins of LB gives me no recon normally and today was no different.
1.5 min of AoW-- I noticed nothing.
Yeah. Art of War has fucked up my stack.
Thank you Sub Club!
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Feeling saucy today, prolly delete it later!
Yeah man- made it the new profile pic for now.
Middle child got me a new water pipe for muh birfday. Time to test 'er out!
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Happy birthday!
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3 min AoW today!
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Happy birthday
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4/19/25
5 min Gen2.0
5 min AoW
5 min LB
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4/21/25
1.5 min TWTP
7.5 min AoW
15 min LB
Hands tingling just now while mentally reviewing past in law encounters
Some facial tension
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4/24/25
10 min AoW
10 min BDD
10 min AuraBoost
Yeah buddy. Got one in!
Subconscious suggested a stack of Emp D, AoW, and ALCH; came in a thought stream from within my mind.
Already working on finalizing a DADDY: Dong of War custom.
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NEMT LB /w King’s Radiance ordered! Wooooo
4/28/25
Oldest child is 21 today! The survival of my autistic genes continues apace.
I had ordered NE PN /w NDE core after LB /w King’s Radiance, but PN arrived first. Gave it 3 minutes last night before getting home. I already had “ordered” a BJ for after work last night, but it was exceptionally good, and I just got done with a round of mattress tag this morning.
Name Embedded Major Title Primal Nights with added NDE… Core----PizzaShaman approved! Most definitely on deck for the anniversary stack.
I have to go to the dentist this morning. 
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