“It´s an insult to my potential not to embody the very best version of myself”
Khan Stage 1
Khan Black Stage 1
Ecstasy of Gold Stage 1
Diamond
Objective:
Clear whatever issues there are around self love, wealth, power, sexuality, success etc. etc.
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This is not cool, you have four subs.
Looks awesome wish you luck man!
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Khan Black is a title a part of me used to shy away from, there was fear surrounding facing my sexuality.
However, after running Total Breakdown with EoG st 1 for about 2 weeks, followed by a washout and a couple loops of my Custom, I felt ready for it.
Had 5 minutes of KB1 and K1 each at a relatives, while guiding the subliminals to destroy any form of negative programming, especially from porn. Felt pressure in my head as a response and a sense of lightness in my system, moving faster yet more grounded, mind was very clear.
While we were playing a dice game later on I´ve started tearing up and had a few minutes of deep emotional shifts in my torso, that I can´t really describe. Feeling very “by myself” even with people around me, stopped talking completely for about 10 minutes, just staring onto the table, my body going through the motions mechanically. It was like waking up to actual reality, to me, feeling grounded and present, had a very psychedelic feel to it.
Nobody responded to me tearing up, it was like I´ve entered my own world, them being unable to register anything than my physical presence., while I´ve started to wake up to the “real me”, my essence, and how it goes far beyond this physical body, these people only being able to experience the later.
The thought arrived “Of course, they´ve never really seen me”, but unlike before it felt rather…liberating than negative. A form of truce, an understanding of how limited and superficial their perception really is.
And that it´s okay, that´s just how they are. Just like I am how I am.
Instilling a sense of peace, forgiving them for the sense of neglect I´ve used to feel, understanding that my worth isn´t tied to them recognizing me, my energy/lifeforce, which rather feels like the same thing, but that I validate myself, without need for external recognition, just by purely existing.
Me = Lifeforce = Power = Presence = Existence = Unconditional Love
Man I can already tell Khan Black is a different animal lol, bridging the physical with the metaphysical.
Later that night I started journaling. A memory from childhood came up, how energetic I used to be as a young boy.
That I loved to move all day, running around, climbing, jumping, getting into (mostly playful) fights with other boys, pure lust for life, and how I was shut down, forced not to move for extended periods of time, when I got into school.
Constantly being told that I´d be too “hyperactive”, that somethings wrong with me, that I´d be talking too much, that I´d stop the other kids from studying, them putting me on a single, seperated table at times so I wouldn´t “disturb the class” etc.
This really fucked with me when I look back.
I´m not made to sit still and keep my mouth shut, and it resonates with what @SaintSovereign mentioned in the KB thread as well, (My) energy is meant to move, to flow around, not to be chastised and pressed into containters (classrooms), forced to stagnate and sit still in one specific place.
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Self love is so amazing, I can’t even put it into words.
Only the beginning too.
I am going through some profound changes on this stack (currently taking a break), and just overall feeling more aligned with a spiritual path.
Skimmed some of this journal and it´s incredible how much I resonate with the things SwedishBuddha mentioned in there.
I am utterly transforming, re-assesing not just my overall identity, but life, money, women, relationships, and my overall approach to it as well.
It blows my mind, I´m burning through pages in my offline journals, as I can barely keep up with the transformation and insights that are pouring from my consciousness. Every dream, every thought, every experience is an infinite well of inspiration and transformation.
The masculine archetypes, King, Warrior, Lover, Magician came into my mind, and how I am basically about to embody all of them in the most highest form.
I feel liberating, actualizing, in the fast lane torwards my true self and power.
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Im glad my old journal inspired you,
The spiritual journey is such a interesting thing,
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Khan Black is the shit lol, coupled with Khan?
Nothing you can´t do.
I´m stacking it with my custom now tho, so I should probably make a new journal.
@moderators please close this one 