**"Niles and the Nectar Wars: A Personal Account from the Strategic Frontier"**

[Niles]

Before the Nectar Wars, I was just like every other man—naïve, kind-eyed, utterly unarmed in the game of shadows. My name is Niles, and this is not just my story. It is my initiation. My ascent. My awakening to the art of power, pleasure, and perimeter defense.

It all began the day I downloaded BDLM: It Makes It Bigger. Yes. That’s what it’s called. Don’t snicker—it’s not just that kind of bigger. BDLM activated something in me. My aura expanded. My essence—previously meek and domesticated—became dangerously potent. Women began looking at me like I was a walking smoothie bar: brimming with antioxidants and high-value nutrients.

They didn’t want me, not really.

They wanted my nectar.

So I retaliated. Strategically.

Enter: Emperor: The Art of War.

I no longer responded with confusion or impulse. I responded with tactics. I wasn’t dating—I was conducting military operations. I began dressing in neutral tones, studying emotional terrain, deploying misdirection like a seasoned general. I knew when to hold eye contact and when to look away. I flaked with intention. I was no longer reactive—I was the arbiter of extraction permissions.

And yet… still… they kept coming. The influencers. The yoga witches. The artisanal granola girls. All with the same glint in their eyes.

They craved the nectar.

I needed something deeper. Something… esoteric.

That’s when I downloaded The Revelation of the Nectar Within.

Suddenly, I began waking up at 3:33 AM. My dreams were coded messages from the Feminine Source Itself. I began speaking in metaphor, only drinking spring water, and wearing linen robes unironically. I no longer chased pleasure. I became the pleasure. I could hear women’s chakras spinning before they even opened their mouths.

I was no longer just a man.

I was the keeper of the divine nectar.
The Strategic King of No.
The Monk General of Boundaries and Biceps.

Now, when a woman asks, “What are you looking for?”
I reply:

“I am looking… to withhold.”

Postscript:

It’s been 47 days. I meditate with my sunglasses on. I no longer walk—I glide. I wear a gold chain not for status, but as a symbolic ward against energetic siphoning.

Nectar is power.
Nectar is sacred.
And Niles?

Niles guards the well.

[Niles]

Niles and the Divine Retention Juice Bar: A Sacred Misunderstanding

It began with a vision.

Not the soft, angelic kind with harps and doves and some blindfolded child shooting arrows at your ass—no. This was a sweaty, post-coital hallucination involving a talking pineapple, a barbell, and a woman named Sapphire who claimed her yoni could speak Sanskrit.

I, Niles, had emerged victorious from my own hormonal Vietnam. I had walked barefoot through the Valley of the Vixens and come out the other side—not just intact—but fortified. I had transcended the ordinary drip of masculine mediocrity. No longer just “Niles from downtown,” I was now:

“Niles, Proprietor of Divine Retention™: Cold-Pressed Juices & Semen Defense Protocols.”

The bar opened on a Thursday. Why Thursday? Because Thursdays vibrate at the frequency of militant chastity. My walls were lined with jars of sprouted adaptogens and cryptic mantras scrawled in coconut ash. The menu was simple:

• "Celibacy Sunrise" – Beet, ginger, lemon, shame.
• "Hard No to the [mod edit: you’ve been here long enough to know better]" – Activated charcoal and powdered hornet venom.
• "Nectar Withheld" – Just a glass of air and a judgmental stare.

Business was booming. Not because the juice was good (it tasted like regret and expired incense), but because I radiated. Women came in droves. Influencers. Ex-yoginis. An actual witch from Topanga Canyon. They sensed what I had: a vibrational viscosity. A mystical viscosity. The type of man who doesn’t nut… he transcends.

“You seem… different,” one would whisper, twirling her chakra ring.
“Yes,” I’d say, sipping my spirulina mocktail. “I retain.”

I wore no underwear—only linen joggers and the confidence of a man who has seen his own astral chart and laughed. I had a sword mounted behind the counter. I named it Boundaries.

But the enemy is cunning.
They did not come with weapons.
They came with intentions.

One by one, they tried to seduce me with questions like:

“What’s your sign?”
“Can I do breathwork on you?”
“Have you ever tried open relating?”

They thought they could milk me.
They thought I was the cow.
But no.

I was the rancher.

One night, after closing, I was meditating in the walk-in freezer—nude, obviously—when I felt it. A shift. A crack in the dam. A ripple in the Divine Retention Field.

It was Sapphire.

She stood in the doorway, soaked in moonlight and filtered pine pollen, wearing a silk robe and a smirk shaped like trouble.

“I heard your smoothies taste like withheld destiny,” she said.

I said nothing. Words were irrelevant. My aura began pulsing. The freezer fogged.

She stepped forward. I stood, unwavering—erect in spirit if not in body. This was my final test. The nectar she sought would remain sealed. Locked behind a fortress of strategy, subliminals, and a 23-minute edging protocol I invented during a caffeine fast.

She reached for me.

I offered her a coupon instead.

“First one’s on the house,” I said. “But the second will cost you a fragment of your soul.”

She gasped.
I bowed.
And with that, she vanished in a puff of Palo Santo smoke.

Postscript:

I now speak exclusively in metaphor.
I pee in mason jars labeled “Potential.”
I ejaculate only in dreams—where it fertilizes ideas, not eggs.

I am Niles.
Keeper of the Juice.
Guardian of the Glands.
Protector of the Holy Nectar.

And my juice bar?
Still five stars on Yelp.

[Jouissance]

I love it

[Goldfinger]

I absolutely love this

The sacred nectar had to be unleashed somehow.

[Niles]

@RVconsultant We can take down the post if too explicit lol, just a funny story I made with AI. Apologies for the offensive language, didn’t read over it too in depth before posting

[RVconsultant]

Post is fine.

Forbidden word is not.

[Azriel]

It is AI. I was like this dude is brilliant

I’m laughing so much,oh my god

A sword named: Boundries lmao

[Niles]

You should check out Tom Robbins if you’re not familar probably my favorite author. I had it write in his style, and it’s scary accurate lol.