NewLease; Patient Journey

Journals - Major Programs
#1

Okay, so I listen to 30s of TB on Friday Jun 26th in the afternoon, didn’t feel much the rest of the day. The day after I felt horny and gave in to porn, I regret that. Listened to 30s again today, felt something for a while, I’m sure something is happening.

Each time I used Khan, I would always mess-up by either moving on to the next stage before I was ready, listen to full loops instead of micro loops, or just get impatient. I’m sticking with TB, no time frame. When I move on to Stage 2 it will be because the time is right to do so. The same with Stages 3 & 4.

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#2

Feeling anxious right now, felt it on the drive to the office as well. I’ve noticed that during the week, I feel these subs kick in. Something about being in this environment triggers something in me. I’m guessing because I have a desire to leave this job and do my own thing, create my own thing. That’s all for the time being.

#3

Thought about switching this morning, after a while, I remembered why I’m on the Khan Journey. I want to be someone who I can be proud of.

#4

Emperor is the only sub that feels right. But I’m so impatient for results that I shoot myself in the foot. I need to get this right.

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#5

May I ask, why you’re so impatient for results? What’s in you that’s making you so impatient for results?

How are you so impatient for results (Logically it doesn’t make sense to the conscious mind, yet the subconscious gets it)

What’s the feeling that you’re running away from or towards, or not willing to feel making you so impatient for results?

#6

Off the top of my head, it’s age. At 36 I feel like I should be so much further along personally, professionally, financially, socially, romantically and sexually, and I’m nowhere. It’s not like these subs aren’t giving me results, they are. It’s just I feel like too much time has passed and I’m about to lose the game if I haven’t already.

#7

I’ve had an on again off again relationship with Emperor. I always come back to it and always walk away from it. I always say I’ll stick with and don’t only to regret not doing so. Do I want to be someone who can be loved, admired and respected by others? Do I want to love, admire and respect myself? Do I feel like I deserve love, admiration and respect? I’m standing in my own way. I have to go through myself.